(01102002 – sorry about lateness! I was too tired to go on much at all last night! ^^;)

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Four whole days.

Four days.

He's been missing a lot of classes, doesn't he know that?

I bet he's not eating right.

He's never eaten right.

Hell, I'm lucky if I even get him to eat toast!

What about that psycho at the department store? Did she find out where he was?

Is he sick?

Am I just being paranoid?

Probably.

I didn't want to do the dishes. I did them eventually. But every day so far, I've left them in the sink.

Hmmph. I can see it now- "Oi! Heero! Get your ass back here! You have dishes to wash!"

Keeping a gun with me was an almost unbreakable habit after the war, but I trained myself out of it.. Well, Hirde did. She kept complaining about the gun to the point that I just stopped carrying it so she wouldn't have something to whine about. I carried my gun because I was paranoid. Because I was uneasy. It was the only way you could tell I was a pessimist.

Heero. Get back here. I'm carrying my gun again.

****

The park was fairly empty, but considering that most people were eating dinner now, it wasn't surprising.

I wanted to go somewhere and think.

I wanted Heero to be there.

Why does everything go back to HIM!?

I sat down on the bench and looked towards the artificial pond, big help that would do.

Some inane hope in me formulated the idea that he'd be at the park. He always went to the park in the evening, before he came home. I don't know what he did out here. He just sat there every day. Here, I should say. On the bench where I am now. Maybe he was watching the kids play, thinking of his own childhood, perhaps? Thinking of missed opportunities?

Looking at the pond like it was going to give him some mystical answer?

It sure as hell wasn't doing any good for me at the moment.

There were a few people here though, mostly couples. They walked along hand in hand, smiling like there was no observant and idle bystander watching them…

That is one of the most awkward things you can do. You sit alone somewhere and watch people, and don't hope they realize that you're the one with the eyes drilling into their backs.

I bet Heero doesn't feel like this.

Someone sat on the bench one over from mine.

I couldn't help it.

I glanced ov-

Dammit. If you can find anyone, just ANYONE that has worse luck than me, please. Tell me.

I want to laugh at them and make myself feel better.

The girl on the bench stood up again and sauntered over to me, cute face still smiling like maniac.

I wasn't having a good week.

She stood before me.

"So.. What's your name?" I could see the gun in the pocket of her trenchcoat, and I really didn't care. She should get a holster like Heero has, considering how much she must carry that pistol around.

"Where is Heero Yuy?"

"I don't know."

Her face was strained. "Tell me."

I had a gut instinct that she got some grief about me telling her nothing the first time. "I don't know. He's been gone. What do you need him for anyway?"

"It's none of your business, Maxwell."

"Hey, is this one of those 'The American Is Too Dumb To Handle It' things cause if it is I-"

"Where is he?"

Okay, this was starting to piss me off.

"I don't know, dammit!"

"I have to find him before anything else happens… You really don't know where he is?" Her voice held something I recognized even more than the look in her eyes days earlier.

Empty hope.

"What would happen?"

She dropped her hands, and I could hear metal clack, "Nothing good… Nothing good."

Then she fell over.

Well, I could think about something other than He-

That guy who I split rent with.