Everything You Want
BY: SleepyAngel
Don't Know Why
Surrounded by students, Marie smiled at Bobby when he looked her way in class.
He smiled, nodded, and turned back to the teacher, satisfied. She felt a little fake with that
smile, knowing that she hadn't really enjoyed hanging out with him last night, even though
he'd been sweet and listened to her and talked about whatever came to mind. For some
stupid reason, the only thing on her mind was Logan. She wished that he would just leave
her mind temporarily, just long enough to enjoy other things in life. Why couldn't she feel
for Bobby what she did for Logan? Bobby was available, closer her age, just as cute as
Logan, and was everything she could want.
Marie doodled in her notebook, once again distracted from school work for
Logan's safety. If she could have some way to contact him, like Jean, maybe she wouldn't
feel so isolated among everyone else. She thought that maybe she felt some of what Logan
did, the freak factor as she'd heard some students refer to it. The avoidance that came with
being a mutant, and then a step further with being a dangerous one, was something she
and Logan shared. Why this made her feel so close to him, she wouldn't have known, if
she hadn't overheard what the Professor had been explaining to Logan about memories he
didn't think were his. When she'd taken anyone's life force, she'd taken and given
memories, coming as close as blood with Logan, whom she'd shared life with twice.
Holding her head in her hands, Marie remembered another, the first, she'd touched
with this, this freak factor. Her first boyfriend, the only one she'd ever kissed besides her
parents, who didn't count for that anyway, was off living some other life, just like she was,
like the other had never existed. It was easier that way then trying to see why she had put
Matt in a coma, why she had left. Sometimes, she did wonder what her parents thought, if
they moved on.
Maybe it didn't matter. She had to let the past go and keep on living. Unlike
Logan, who couldn't let go, Marie knew she couldn't take dwelling in what was. She often
felt some of that longing he had, and wondered if it was her own heart tugging to be free
or just a different person's reaching for truth they couldn't touch.
What would Logan come back like? She knew he wouldn't give up until he found
what he was looking for. What if the past was supposed to be buried, the reason he
couldn't find it? Marie had tried to talk him out if it, though not very convincingly, using a
line he'd used for her. Running away and running to were too confusing, to easy to mix
up. Which was Logan doing? She wondered if he even thought about her, she wanted to
know what he was thinking with his spontaneity and confusing mind. She wished she
could be mad at him, with his abrupt departure and skimpy explanation. Still, there was
anger in her, just not at Logan, who she couldn't find a solid reason for to be mad at him.
Marie scratched the paper with such a rough pencil that it tore the paper. She
looked around to make sure no one noticed and decided to stare distractedly at her hands.
If there was anyone she was really angry at, it was Jean. That woman could find out his
thoughts without having to shift through all Marie did, the confusion and memories and
mixed signals. What if she could also influence his thoughts? Marie was sure she couldn't,
but the thought was still frightening. With that, she would have no chance at all. Logan
would never be hers.
"...due tomorrow. Don't forget," Orroro said, smiling as she saw blank, frantic
stares meeting her knowing eyes. Marie liked Orroro and her common sense, like knowing
few students would pay attention when it was their last class on a Thursday, so close to
the weekend. But today, Marie didn't appreciate the woman's easy going, it's-not-my-fault-
if-you-can't-take-responsibility attitude, especially since she was one of the blank stare
people.
Packing up her things when the class was dismissed, Marie felt some one standing
next to her and watching. She looked up, not very surprised to see Bobby's smiling face.
She tried to smile back, but felt so stupid that she looked down into her bag, hoping he
didn't take this as reject.
Luckily, he wasn't such a complex person that he'd take it the wrong way, or
analyze it. Marie was glad for that, but she craved something wilder, some one more
unpredictable. She wished that her mind would stop returning to Logan. She shoved the
rest of the books in her bag, not caring what it squished, and remembered her present
problem: homework.
"Did you get the assignment?" Bobby asked, seeming to read her mind, letting his
hand be free for hers. She wished she'd carried some books, because she could hardly
stand to keep setting Bobby up like this, knowing she'd ignore him when Logan came
back. If he did.
"Um, no. I was just going to ask you about it." She smiled, feeling her eyelashes
bat more than they should. No wonder he thought she was madly in love with him. No
wonder Logan thought she was a child. She acted totally wrong for every situation.
Bobby finally grabbed her hand himself, and grinned at her. "We could work on it
together. Even if you were there distracting me, I'd like it better than sitting alone, not able
to concentrate because I'd be thinking about you." He looked so hopeful, and was saying
things so right that Marie felt her hand melt in his. How could he be so perfect, but so
totally wrong?
BY: SleepyAngel
Don't Know Why
Surrounded by students, Marie smiled at Bobby when he looked her way in class.
He smiled, nodded, and turned back to the teacher, satisfied. She felt a little fake with that
smile, knowing that she hadn't really enjoyed hanging out with him last night, even though
he'd been sweet and listened to her and talked about whatever came to mind. For some
stupid reason, the only thing on her mind was Logan. She wished that he would just leave
her mind temporarily, just long enough to enjoy other things in life. Why couldn't she feel
for Bobby what she did for Logan? Bobby was available, closer her age, just as cute as
Logan, and was everything she could want.
Marie doodled in her notebook, once again distracted from school work for
Logan's safety. If she could have some way to contact him, like Jean, maybe she wouldn't
feel so isolated among everyone else. She thought that maybe she felt some of what Logan
did, the freak factor as she'd heard some students refer to it. The avoidance that came with
being a mutant, and then a step further with being a dangerous one, was something she
and Logan shared. Why this made her feel so close to him, she wouldn't have known, if
she hadn't overheard what the Professor had been explaining to Logan about memories he
didn't think were his. When she'd taken anyone's life force, she'd taken and given
memories, coming as close as blood with Logan, whom she'd shared life with twice.
Holding her head in her hands, Marie remembered another, the first, she'd touched
with this, this freak factor. Her first boyfriend, the only one she'd ever kissed besides her
parents, who didn't count for that anyway, was off living some other life, just like she was,
like the other had never existed. It was easier that way then trying to see why she had put
Matt in a coma, why she had left. Sometimes, she did wonder what her parents thought, if
they moved on.
Maybe it didn't matter. She had to let the past go and keep on living. Unlike
Logan, who couldn't let go, Marie knew she couldn't take dwelling in what was. She often
felt some of that longing he had, and wondered if it was her own heart tugging to be free
or just a different person's reaching for truth they couldn't touch.
What would Logan come back like? She knew he wouldn't give up until he found
what he was looking for. What if the past was supposed to be buried, the reason he
couldn't find it? Marie had tried to talk him out if it, though not very convincingly, using a
line he'd used for her. Running away and running to were too confusing, to easy to mix
up. Which was Logan doing? She wondered if he even thought about her, she wanted to
know what he was thinking with his spontaneity and confusing mind. She wished she
could be mad at him, with his abrupt departure and skimpy explanation. Still, there was
anger in her, just not at Logan, who she couldn't find a solid reason for to be mad at him.
Marie scratched the paper with such a rough pencil that it tore the paper. She
looked around to make sure no one noticed and decided to stare distractedly at her hands.
If there was anyone she was really angry at, it was Jean. That woman could find out his
thoughts without having to shift through all Marie did, the confusion and memories and
mixed signals. What if she could also influence his thoughts? Marie was sure she couldn't,
but the thought was still frightening. With that, she would have no chance at all. Logan
would never be hers.
"...due tomorrow. Don't forget," Orroro said, smiling as she saw blank, frantic
stares meeting her knowing eyes. Marie liked Orroro and her common sense, like knowing
few students would pay attention when it was their last class on a Thursday, so close to
the weekend. But today, Marie didn't appreciate the woman's easy going, it's-not-my-fault-
if-you-can't-take-responsibility attitude, especially since she was one of the blank stare
people.
Packing up her things when the class was dismissed, Marie felt some one standing
next to her and watching. She looked up, not very surprised to see Bobby's smiling face.
She tried to smile back, but felt so stupid that she looked down into her bag, hoping he
didn't take this as reject.
Luckily, he wasn't such a complex person that he'd take it the wrong way, or
analyze it. Marie was glad for that, but she craved something wilder, some one more
unpredictable. She wished that her mind would stop returning to Logan. She shoved the
rest of the books in her bag, not caring what it squished, and remembered her present
problem: homework.
"Did you get the assignment?" Bobby asked, seeming to read her mind, letting his
hand be free for hers. She wished she'd carried some books, because she could hardly
stand to keep setting Bobby up like this, knowing she'd ignore him when Logan came
back. If he did.
"Um, no. I was just going to ask you about it." She smiled, feeling her eyelashes
bat more than they should. No wonder he thought she was madly in love with him. No
wonder Logan thought she was a child. She acted totally wrong for every situation.
Bobby finally grabbed her hand himself, and grinned at her. "We could work on it
together. Even if you were there distracting me, I'd like it better than sitting alone, not able
to concentrate because I'd be thinking about you." He looked so hopeful, and was saying
things so right that Marie felt her hand melt in his. How could he be so perfect, but so
totally wrong?