Please check out my website- http://devoted.to/x5
LACRIMA AMARE - Chapter 2
Her eyes slowly opened though she hadn't remembered falling asleep. She jumped slightly as she caught sight of her brother, sitting watching her in the arm chair beside her bed. She blinked.
"Jondy," he said.
"Krit," she acknowledged; the sound came out as sort of a rasp because she hadn't spoken for so many days. She licked her dry lips and brought a hand up, running it through her newly-cut hair. She laughed suddenly as she felt the length but the sound was wild and hollow. Krit's eyes were fixed on her raised wrist, on the still-healing slice across the pearly white skin, his face filled with shock and sadness and worry and love. She lowered her arm.
"How long have I been asleep?" she asked.
"At least an hour," he told her, standing up. "That's when I got here."
"Why are you here?" she asked, watching him warily as he approached her and took a seat beside her on the bed.
"I was worried."
"Zack," she tried not to spit his name. "He told you to check on me."
"No." Krit reached out, touched her short hair, forced a smile. "I like it."
"Liar."
"Yeah." He dropped his hand. "Hungry?"
"No."
"I'll get us something." He reached for the phone on her bedside table. "Chinese? Pizza?"
"I'm not hungry."
"I like hawaiian, what about you?"
"Ham is gross. So is pineapple."
"Pepperoni, then," he said, dialling. She glanced away from him, out the window, listened to him order politely. Birds were chirping outside; spring was coming. A moment later she felt his weight on the bed; he was lying next to her. She rolled over to face him and watched him as he stared up at the ceiling for several moments.
"What are you doing?" she finally asked.
"Worrying," he said. That was obvious, written all over his face; she touched his cheek with a hand that was now always cold.
"I'm fine."
"No," he said, meeting her dull blue eyes. His were as dark and pensive as always. She tried to smile at him but couldn't make her lips turn upwards. She dropped her palm from his face to his shoulder and he cringed, reaching up and gingerly moving her hand.
"What?"
"Nothing," he said. "I got in a scrape; I'm healing."
"With Zack?"
"And Syl. Max."
"How are they?"
"Good. Worried about you."
"And Zack?" she asked, hating herself for wanting to know. "Where is he?"
"I don't know," Krit admitted.
"Not worried," Jondy concluded from his tone. He looked at her, touched her cold face.
"Always worried," he countered, his dark eyes boring deep into hers, full of truth and love. This time she almost managed to smile at him.
He convinced her to get dressed and wash her hair; by the time she was done the pizza had arrived. She stared at the haircut she'd given herself in the mirror and groaned.
"It's almost as short as when I was little," she complained, sinking into a chair across from Krit at the kitchen table and tugging absently at one of her blonde locks.
"Not quite that bad," he said, setting a plate of pizza down in front of her. She picked up a piece, suddenly famished, and took a bite of cheese and crust and delicious sauce. Krit, satisfied, began to eat his own food. He was done much sooner than she was and she pushed away her helping of pizza without finishing even half.
"My stomach hurts," she said by way of explanation.
"When was the last time you ate?" he asked her. There was a pause before she shrugged. He frowned. "That long, huh?"
"When are you staying till?" she asked.
"I don't have to be anywhere."
"Won't Syl be missing you?"
"She understands. It's not as if I've ditched her for just anyone." Jondy glanced up at him; he was smiling. "Anyway," he continued, "We're not so much like that anymore. So, I'm here until you get sick of me." She managed to turn her lips up slightly.
"Thanks," she said, and meant it.
On the third day he handed her a glass of water and told her, "Zane's
alive." There was a long pause.
"I tried to kill myself last week," she said, watching him, taking a sip of the drink and hugging her legs. He sat on the sofa next to her, nodded, wondered if she'd even heard him.
"I know." The stars were shining outside. He didn't push it.
"I couldn't do it." She stared down at her wrists; the cuts were completely healed now. There was no evidence it had ever happened and for some reason that made her sad. Krit was gazing at her.
"Yeah." He looked so afraid. Jondy glanced down at herself and was pleased to see that she wasn't quite so pale, and her hands weren't shaking as much they had been before. Her skin was almost warm. She looked at Krit and didn't have to force her smile.
Two days later she glanced up from the book she was half-reading and
asked him, "Why did you say that about Zane?" So she had heard him. He shut off
the television, looked at her.
"Because it's true." He could tell that she didn't believe him. He was scared though he didn't show it; what was wrong with her? This wasn't the Jondy he remembered.
After a momentary pause, she asked, "Can we eat out tonight?"
"Wherever you want to go," he told her softly.
"Krit?"
"Yes?"
"I'm glad you're here."
"Me too."