A/N: Some of these characters are not really canon, but I decided to toy around with this a bit. Here are the basic outlines.

Nathan Detriot: Harry Potter

Nicely Nicely Johnson: Draco Malfoy

Big Jule: Rubeus Hagrid

General Cartwright: Minerva McGonagall

Mission Band: Gryffindor Quidditch Team

Sinners: Slytherin House

Ack, so that last bit might be a bit biased. Deal with it.

Harry: We will now hear testimonty from Bother Draco Malfoy

Draco: Who me?

Harry: We will NOW hear testimony from Brother Draco Malfoy

Hagrid: Get up you fat blast ended scroot!

Draco: Well, it ah, happened to me kinda funny. Like a dream. Yeah, that's it, a dream.

McGonagall: Tell us in your own words!

Draco:

I DREAMED LAST NIGHT I GOT ON THE TRAIN TO HOGWARTS/

AND BY SOME CHANCE I HAD BROUGHT MY WAND ALONG/

AND THERE I STOOD/

AND I HOLLERED "MORDSMORDE"/

BUT THE STUDENTS KNEW RIGHT FROM WRONG/

Quidditch Team: RIGHT FROM WRONG

Slytherins: RIGHT FROM WRONG

Draco:

FOR THE STUDENTS ALL SAID WATCH OUT/

WATCH OUT YOU'RE USING DARK ARTS/

THE STUDENTS ALL SAID WATCH OUT/

WATCH OUT YOU'RE USING DARK ARTS/

AND THE DEATH EATERS WILL TAKE YOU UNDER/

AND THE EVILNESS WILL NEVER STOP/

SO WATCH OUT WATCH OUT WATCH OUT WATCH OUT/

WATCH OUT YOU'RE USING DARK ARTS

I CHUGGED AWAY ON THAT LITTLE TRAIN TO HOGWARTS/

AND BY SOME CHANCE I FOUND A TEXTBOOK IN MY FIST/

AND THERE I STOOD/

AND I STUDIED UP THE DARK ARTS/

BUT THE STUDENTS WEREN'T BOUND TO TAKE PART/

FOR THE STUDENTS ALL SAID BEWARE/

Quidditch Team: BEWARE

Slytherins: BEWARE

Draco:

BEWARE YOU WON'T GO FAR/

THE STUDENTS ALL SAID BEWARE/

AND VOLDEMORT WILL COME ON THE CAR/

AND THE DEATH EATERS WILL TAKE YOU UNDER/

AND THE EVILNESS WILL NEVER STOP/

SO WATCH OUT WATCH OUT WATCH OUT WATCH OUT/

WATCH OUT YOU'RE USING DARK ARTS

Quidditch Team and Slytherins: WATCH OUT

Draco:

AND AS I LAUGHED AT THOSE STUDENTS GOING TO HOGWARTS/

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA/

VOLDEMORT CAME AND DRAGGED ME FROM THE TRAIN/

AND AS WE FOUGHT/

I HOLLERED "SOMEONE SAVE ME"/

BUT THAT'S THE MOMENT I WOKE UP/

THANK DUMBLEDORE

Quidditch Team: THANK DUMBLEDORE

Slytherins: THANK DUMBLEDORE

Draco:

AND I SAID TO MYSELF WATCH OUT/

WATCH OUT YOU'RE USING DARK ARTS/

AND I SAID TO MYSELF WATCH OUT/

WATCH OUT YOU'RE USING DARK ARTS/

AND THE DEATH EATERS WILL TAKE YOU UNDER/

AND THE EVILNESS WILL NEVER STOP/

SO WATCH OUT WATCH OUT WATCH OUT WATCH OUT/

WATCH OUT YOU'RE USING DARK ARTS