Disclaimer: Gravitationd doesn't belong to me, but Megami does.
The Difference Between Need And Want
by Yui Miyamoto
Chapter 2 - Le Masque
As usual I stood in the back rearranging the music. Again, I secretly sighed.
There was Hiro. And once more, he was longing for Shuichi. He hid it so well though. So, I don't think anyone really notices this.
But I do.
I know it all too well.
Whether it's because I've seen this type of thing before or if it's because I'm good at reading people. I don't know.
I just can't tell the difference. It's a thin line and it doesn't help that it's becoming more and more blurry.
Sighing again in my mind and reacting the best I could to these types of situations, when it was break time, I went over to Hiro and patted his shoulder. "Hey you."
Hiro smiled and turned around. "Yeah?"
"Want to have lunch?"
Shrugging his shoulders and holding that smile that didn't fit his mood, he answered, "Sure, why not?"
I didn't like this smile. Ever.
We sat down in a cafe across the street to grab a quick thing to eat. As we sat there, I cleared my throat as Hiro leaned on a fist and watched the cars passing by on the busy street.
For a while, I didn't say anything but close my eyes and poised as usual as I sipped some of my tea.
When I was about to open my mouth to stop the disturbing silence, that damned song, 'Le Masque' by Megami Nemutteiruno*, came on and I immediately closed my mouth.
"...I hate playing this masquerading game
Where I must hide behind a mask
that holds no promise for
it's owner.
Everyone plays that game,
you know you do,
and yet you try to deny
The only you,
the real you.
If you could just see what I mean,
you'd understand
my need is only
your want.
And your want is
what I really need.
This feeling cannot change
because I cannot change it,
we seem to be standing in time,
but we are only silent...
Only silent..."
"You seem really quiet today, Fujisaki-san." Hiro finally commented to pick me out of my daydreaming.
Wow, I've never done that before...or at least, while people are around...
"Daydreaming?" I gave him a look that told him otherwise. "I'm just thinking about something."
"What are you thinking about?" He began to take out a cigarette.
Putting my hand out, I requested, "Can you please not do that?"
I know you get this way when you're nervous Hiro. You always do that.
"Oh, okay." He answered back as put it back into his pant pocket.
I don't want you to make your life shorter on me...
I won't accept that...
"To put it truthfully, what's wrong?" I looked at him concerned. Actually, what I wanted was to just go and hug him, but I was going to hold my reserve.
I was a professional at this. I would always be...
"What are you talking about?" He looked back at me as if there were nothing in the back of his mind.
But I knew better. I knew Hiro too well by now.
I've hung out so much with him that I should know what's going on in his head.
Besides, I observed him quite carefully...
He was an interesting personality that I had not dealt with and wanted to know more about.
The Seguchi family motto: "You either know, or you know more. There is no uncertainty. It isn't in your vocabulary."
My eyes became slits and I gave him a look of 'I'm not convinced.'
And so I countered with, "You're slouching. You're not listening to your own song. You are 1/16th away from the rhythm. So if you tell me that there is something not wrong, tell me to my face."
With a stubborn look on his face, he stared at me. "There is nothing wrong, Fujisaki-san."
Closing my eyes in frustration, I kept my calm exterior. "Fine."
At that moment, the song repeated as if to torture me more,
"...If you could just see what I mean,
you'd understand
my need is only
your want.
And your want is
what I really need.
This feeling cannot change
because I cannot change it,
we seem to be standing in time,
but we are only silent.
(fades to instrumental)"
Kill me with the violin now...
I loved Megami, but she always seemed to come up at important phases of my life.
Getting up in frustration, I said something that I knew I was going to regret. But, even the mature mind can give out to childish things.
Without turning around, I harshly said, "If you stare at Shindou-san for too long, you'll only hurt yourself more."
In silence, I walked away to the front to pay and left the cafe.
When I first met you, you had this smile on your face that I couldn't understand if you were happy or about to cry because you made it possible with the way you did it. And so, I started to watch everyone closely, but you most of all.
More and more I found myself falling in to you...
All my life, I was able to hold those type of emotions that were considered weak or imperfect to the human race. I was invincible. No one could hurt me if I kept my calm exterior out.
Smooth and in control, I thought my mask was inpenetrable.
"Yeah..." I went into an alley and leaned in back of it. Hitting my fist on the wall I started to cry.
And that haunting song came back to me. A girl started to sing aloud as she passed by,
"There's a silence you'll hear.
A whisper that calls from the depths of the heart.
If you could just see what I mean,
you'd understand
my need is only
your want.
And your want is
what I really need..."
Crying harder, I looked down. "Damn you, Hiro."
Need and want are not the same.
I didn't know that they could be until I met you Hiro.
---
Author's note: Suguru-kun~! Wah~!
* note *: Megami Nemutteiruno is an original character of my story 'The Voice Actress'. She is supposedly a famous seiyuu and singer. And if you think this sounds like Megumi Hayashibara, yes, I did model her after her. She is my idol.
The Difference Between Need And Want
by Yui Miyamoto
Chapter 2 - Le Masque
As usual I stood in the back rearranging the music. Again, I secretly sighed.
There was Hiro. And once more, he was longing for Shuichi. He hid it so well though. So, I don't think anyone really notices this.
But I do.
I know it all too well.
Whether it's because I've seen this type of thing before or if it's because I'm good at reading people. I don't know.
I just can't tell the difference. It's a thin line and it doesn't help that it's becoming more and more blurry.
Sighing again in my mind and reacting the best I could to these types of situations, when it was break time, I went over to Hiro and patted his shoulder. "Hey you."
Hiro smiled and turned around. "Yeah?"
"Want to have lunch?"
Shrugging his shoulders and holding that smile that didn't fit his mood, he answered, "Sure, why not?"
I didn't like this smile. Ever.
We sat down in a cafe across the street to grab a quick thing to eat. As we sat there, I cleared my throat as Hiro leaned on a fist and watched the cars passing by on the busy street.
For a while, I didn't say anything but close my eyes and poised as usual as I sipped some of my tea.
When I was about to open my mouth to stop the disturbing silence, that damned song, 'Le Masque' by Megami Nemutteiruno*, came on and I immediately closed my mouth.
"...I hate playing this masquerading game
Where I must hide behind a mask
that holds no promise for
it's owner.
Everyone plays that game,
you know you do,
and yet you try to deny
The only you,
the real you.
If you could just see what I mean,
you'd understand
my need is only
your want.
And your want is
what I really need.
This feeling cannot change
because I cannot change it,
we seem to be standing in time,
but we are only silent...
Only silent..."
"You seem really quiet today, Fujisaki-san." Hiro finally commented to pick me out of my daydreaming.
Wow, I've never done that before...or at least, while people are around...
"Daydreaming?" I gave him a look that told him otherwise. "I'm just thinking about something."
"What are you thinking about?" He began to take out a cigarette.
Putting my hand out, I requested, "Can you please not do that?"
I know you get this way when you're nervous Hiro. You always do that.
"Oh, okay." He answered back as put it back into his pant pocket.
I don't want you to make your life shorter on me...
I won't accept that...
"To put it truthfully, what's wrong?" I looked at him concerned. Actually, what I wanted was to just go and hug him, but I was going to hold my reserve.
I was a professional at this. I would always be...
"What are you talking about?" He looked back at me as if there were nothing in the back of his mind.
But I knew better. I knew Hiro too well by now.
I've hung out so much with him that I should know what's going on in his head.
Besides, I observed him quite carefully...
He was an interesting personality that I had not dealt with and wanted to know more about.
The Seguchi family motto: "You either know, or you know more. There is no uncertainty. It isn't in your vocabulary."
My eyes became slits and I gave him a look of 'I'm not convinced.'
And so I countered with, "You're slouching. You're not listening to your own song. You are 1/16th away from the rhythm. So if you tell me that there is something not wrong, tell me to my face."
With a stubborn look on his face, he stared at me. "There is nothing wrong, Fujisaki-san."
Closing my eyes in frustration, I kept my calm exterior. "Fine."
At that moment, the song repeated as if to torture me more,
"...If you could just see what I mean,
you'd understand
my need is only
your want.
And your want is
what I really need.
This feeling cannot change
because I cannot change it,
we seem to be standing in time,
but we are only silent.
(fades to instrumental)"
Kill me with the violin now...
I loved Megami, but she always seemed to come up at important phases of my life.
Getting up in frustration, I said something that I knew I was going to regret. But, even the mature mind can give out to childish things.
Without turning around, I harshly said, "If you stare at Shindou-san for too long, you'll only hurt yourself more."
In silence, I walked away to the front to pay and left the cafe.
When I first met you, you had this smile on your face that I couldn't understand if you were happy or about to cry because you made it possible with the way you did it. And so, I started to watch everyone closely, but you most of all.
More and more I found myself falling in to you...
All my life, I was able to hold those type of emotions that were considered weak or imperfect to the human race. I was invincible. No one could hurt me if I kept my calm exterior out.
Smooth and in control, I thought my mask was inpenetrable.
"Yeah..." I went into an alley and leaned in back of it. Hitting my fist on the wall I started to cry.
And that haunting song came back to me. A girl started to sing aloud as she passed by,
"There's a silence you'll hear.
A whisper that calls from the depths of the heart.
If you could just see what I mean,
you'd understand
my need is only
your want.
And your want is
what I really need..."
Crying harder, I looked down. "Damn you, Hiro."
Need and want are not the same.
I didn't know that they could be until I met you Hiro.
---
Author's note: Suguru-kun~! Wah~!
* note *: Megami Nemutteiruno is an original character of my story 'The Voice Actress'. She is supposedly a famous seiyuu and singer. And if you think this sounds like Megumi Hayashibara, yes, I did model her after her. She is my idol.