Disclaimer: Gravi belongs to Murakami-sama.
The Difference Between Need and Want
by Miyamoto Yui
Chapter 12 - Kimeru. (To choose.)
"I just do!" rang through my ears like a silent melody never mentioned. And my tears just wouldn't stop. And I kept on whispering to myself, "He said it."
I have finally broken through that exterior that I tried so hard to pound on all this time. But when he finally came around, would I still accept it?
Still crouching on the ground, Hiro closed the door and knelt down to embrace me. I put my hands over his.
See? This is Hiro, Yuki.
Though he is bleeding, though he could be hurting from every bone in his body, though I should be attending to him, he will still protect me...
He will still care about me and abandon himself...
Holding onto Hiro, I whispered while crying, "This is why I love you, Hiro. You're very warm."
With Yuki, his touch is so cold...
"But...but..." I began to sob even more heavily. "Why...why do you have to make me choose?"
It was then that I saw Hiro's face change from his calm exterior to one of shock. But his grip on me was still firm.
"I cannot choose. I need both of you," I said. "It may be selfish, but you two are the most important people in my life."
We stayed there silent holding onto one another as the morning was to begin.
I cannot compare or contrast anything. I can't say who is better or who is worse. That is something I cannot do. I cannot even pick my own breakfast in the morning or make lyrics at the drop of a hat and you expect me to choose something as important as this?
You want to separate me from myself? This is how I'm feeling right now...
Yuki is someone that had started out as some infatuation because he was handsome and I wanted to get back at him for dissing my lyrics when we first met. I wanted so much to crush that mocking smirk he had on that day.
But then, I saw the side to him he wouldn't show to the world. And that means a lot to me. He trusts me that much...
...to come in here and fight for me...
Hiro is someone that has always taken care of me. If anything happened to me, he would be the first to have a say in it. He's been with me through thick and thin, whether or not he liked it. And I admire him for putting up with me...
...to care so much it hurt him...
Turning around, I silently got up and attended to Hiro's injuries. We didn't say a thing throughout the ordeal.
Then, as he sat on his bed, I slipped into his lap and hugged him.
I'm his blind game....
that's what he said...
his need and want...
But I...
my need and want is like this:
I want to be taken care of...
I want to feel needed even if you won't need me...
even...even if you don't...
Oh, Yuki...
These are the things you don't understand about me...
I can live without you, but then I can't just...
"I..." but I couldn't finish as I kissed Hiro with all the love that I couldn't say or show all this time. From all the suppression of these years, I finally let it out.
Holding Hiro more than I ever had, I whispered, "I..."
I don't know what I'm doing...
I may be making a mistake...
But whatever it is,
I know I feel secure...
And all those things I ask,
I have here without question...
Putting his hair behind his ear and lying my hand on his chest, I looked up to his face.
"I choose you, Hiro."
---
Author's comments: Ack...ack...i think i went to sappy. ;_; hope that isn't too much of a problem for you, but that's the flow of the story...
It doesn't help that I'm listening to Seishirou's theme, 'Solid Gold' while I'm doing these chapters, ne? -_-;;;;
The Difference Between Need and Want
by Miyamoto Yui
Chapter 12 - Kimeru. (To choose.)
"I just do!" rang through my ears like a silent melody never mentioned. And my tears just wouldn't stop. And I kept on whispering to myself, "He said it."
I have finally broken through that exterior that I tried so hard to pound on all this time. But when he finally came around, would I still accept it?
Still crouching on the ground, Hiro closed the door and knelt down to embrace me. I put my hands over his.
See? This is Hiro, Yuki.
Though he is bleeding, though he could be hurting from every bone in his body, though I should be attending to him, he will still protect me...
He will still care about me and abandon himself...
Holding onto Hiro, I whispered while crying, "This is why I love you, Hiro. You're very warm."
With Yuki, his touch is so cold...
"But...but..." I began to sob even more heavily. "Why...why do you have to make me choose?"
It was then that I saw Hiro's face change from his calm exterior to one of shock. But his grip on me was still firm.
"I cannot choose. I need both of you," I said. "It may be selfish, but you two are the most important people in my life."
We stayed there silent holding onto one another as the morning was to begin.
I cannot compare or contrast anything. I can't say who is better or who is worse. That is something I cannot do. I cannot even pick my own breakfast in the morning or make lyrics at the drop of a hat and you expect me to choose something as important as this?
You want to separate me from myself? This is how I'm feeling right now...
Yuki is someone that had started out as some infatuation because he was handsome and I wanted to get back at him for dissing my lyrics when we first met. I wanted so much to crush that mocking smirk he had on that day.
But then, I saw the side to him he wouldn't show to the world. And that means a lot to me. He trusts me that much...
...to come in here and fight for me...
Hiro is someone that has always taken care of me. If anything happened to me, he would be the first to have a say in it. He's been with me through thick and thin, whether or not he liked it. And I admire him for putting up with me...
...to care so much it hurt him...
Turning around, I silently got up and attended to Hiro's injuries. We didn't say a thing throughout the ordeal.
Then, as he sat on his bed, I slipped into his lap and hugged him.
I'm his blind game....
that's what he said...
his need and want...
But I...
my need and want is like this:
I want to be taken care of...
I want to feel needed even if you won't need me...
even...even if you don't...
Oh, Yuki...
These are the things you don't understand about me...
I can live without you, but then I can't just...
"I..." but I couldn't finish as I kissed Hiro with all the love that I couldn't say or show all this time. From all the suppression of these years, I finally let it out.
Holding Hiro more than I ever had, I whispered, "I..."
I don't know what I'm doing...
I may be making a mistake...
But whatever it is,
I know I feel secure...
And all those things I ask,
I have here without question...
Putting his hair behind his ear and lying my hand on his chest, I looked up to his face.
"I choose you, Hiro."
---
Author's comments: Ack...ack...i think i went to sappy. ;_; hope that isn't too much of a problem for you, but that's the flow of the story...
It doesn't help that I'm listening to Seishirou's theme, 'Solid Gold' while I'm doing these chapters, ne? -_-;;;;