Ain't It Funny

by VivaGlam

Songfic. Kitty examines her relationship with Lance and decides the course that their relationship will have to take while preparing for their 6 month anniversary, while the song Ain't It Funny by J.Lo plays in the background.

Jennifer Lopez - Ain't It Funny

Ok, before I start this thing, I have to tell all you readers this. I've happened to be really busy on Saturday mornings since the new season starting showing, and so I'm really not up to speed about whether Lance and Kitty are actually going out- so I'm just assuming that they are. And also, I'm not a Lance/Kitty shipper- this just screamed to be written out for them, and since I go wherever my muse Ewan goes, I just wrote this.

And the characters mentioned here all belong to WB, I'm just playing around with them and generally listening to my muse- which is something I really shouldn't do, 'cuz he's ruthless. But yeah, this is the disclaimer, so heads up, you blood-sucking lawyers!!

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Kitty twirled in front of the full-length mirror in her room, watching the loose skirt of the pink dress that she was wearing flare out around her legs, showing off just a flash of thigh, and she smiled happily. This was the 6-month anniversary of her official relationship with Lance, and they were going to be doing something special for tonight. What, she wasn't really sure, but she knew that it was going to be good. It always was.

It seemed to be like the perfect thing for you and me

She remembered the first time that she had realized that Lance had had feelings for her. How she had known, she didn't know. It was one of those things that came with being a girl- the sixth sense that told one about such things.

When she had realized this, the thought had shocked and appalled her. She couldn't like somebody who was supposed to be the enemy!!

It's so ironic you're what I had pictured you to be

But that was only at first. Later on, she had realized that this would solve all the confusing, conflicting emotions she had felt towards the rebellious, handsome leader of the Brotherhood. It eliminated the need for the guilty glances in his direction every time she passed by him, and the torment that accompanied such feelings.

So, when Lance had finally asked her to the dance, she'd been more than glad to say yes. She giggled a little, grinning at the fact that 'more than glad' was a complete understatement. She'd been elated when he asked her, although she'd tried to hide that when in front of the others.

But there are facts in our lives we can never change
Just tell me that you understand and feel the same

Only Rogue saw through the façade. But she hadn't really been surprised when Rogue told her that night, when the two of them were lying in their beds, waiting for sleep to consume them that she was happy for her. Of course, it had been very gruff, and very Rogue-like, but it had clearly been a way of saying that she was glad for Kitty.

This perfect romance that I've created in my mind
I'd live a thousand live each one with you right by my side

Kitty sat down in front of the vanity mirror in the room that she and Rogue shared, and spent some time picking out a color of eye shadow, before applying an accompanying shade of lipstick and gloss to her lips. She thought back to the time when she had first met Lance. Sure, he was cute, but she'd never thought that they'd make it so far. She felt that some part of her had agreed so readily to going out with Lance because she felt that it was just too perfect to last.

But, after awhile, she'd felt that it really was too perfect to last, and so, wanting to save Lance and herself from future heartache, she'd decided break it off with him. Until she'd inadvertently revealed that to Rogue.

She recalled the tirade that had followed from the Goth girl. She'd been furious, calling Kitty 'stupid', 'idiotic', and other words that one generally didn't say in public. Then, Rogue had calmed down, and told her, as politely as possible (for Rogue, anyways) that this was a very unwise decision.

How had she put it? Kitty scrunched her face, doing her best to remember what exactly her words had been. She believed that it ran along the lines of "Lance really cares for you, and he'd never do anything to hurt you. Underneath that tough-guy exterior lies a very caring person, and he doesn't deserve something like this. And neither do you, because I guarantee that this is going to be even more painful for you than it is for him." She smiled as she realized that Rogue was really a very poetic soul, deep down inside. She was glad to call her a friend, even if they didn't get along all the time.
 Kitty mused about the past few months that she'd spent with Lance. They'd been sheer bliss, wonderfully pleasant and it really almost seemed like heaven on earth. She'd never realized how it good it felt to be in love, to feel like part of a whole. It was even better than she had imagined. She finally did not feel the intense need to fit in with the 'cool' crowd anymore, because she'd finally found acceptance with Lance.

She would have loved to spend the rest of her life with Lance, if she could.

But yet we find ourselves in a less than perfect circumstance
And so it seems like we'll never have the chance

She then paused. But this acceptance was not meant to be. It was temporal, and would only have worked in the present, and not the future. How on earth would she tell him? That this was the last time they'd ever be together?

Ain't it funny how some feelings you just can't deny
And you can't move on even though you try
Ain't it strange when you're feeling things you shouldn't feel
Oh, I wish this could be real

How could she have fooled herself into thinking that this was right? And how could she have thought that it was ok, simply because Magneto wasn't around anymore, or that Lance really wasn't that much of a threat to the X-Men anymore?  How on earth could she have allowed Rogue to convince her? The girl couldn't even handle her own life, let alone be handle hers. She'd been trying to live her life through Kitty, acting out feelings for Lance that she knew she could never do in real life.

Yes, that's right. It was merely jealously, plain and simple.

Ain't it funny how a moment could just change your life
And you don't want to face what's wrong or right
Ain't if strange how fate can play a part
In the story of your heart

Sure, Rogue was her friend, but she couldn't allow that to stand in the way of the fact that she and Lance could never be together. Or could they? Surely something that felt this good couldn't be bad for her.

Sometimes I think that a true love can never be
I just believe that somehow it wasn't meant for me

But then, Kitty remembered the first time that she and Lance had fought. His eyes had suddenly gone dark, his face turning as dark as the night. She could have sworn that she had seen his eyes flash red for a moment, and the ground had started to tremble.

Life can be cruel in a way that I can't explain
And I don't think that I could face it all again

Terrified, Kitty had spun around and run off, as quickly as her feet could carry her. She'd never seen Lance that angry before. It was a side of him that scared her so badly. Of course, in hindsight, she realized that Lance would never have hurt her.

Or would he? One could never be truly sure when it came to such things.

So, vexed and distressed, Kitty had sought out the Professor, and poured her heart out to him.

I barely know you but somehow I know what you're about
A deeper love I've found in you and I no longer doubt
You've touched my heart and it altered every plan I've made

She'd spent hours talking to the Professor. And he was sympathetic, and kind, and understanding, like she knew he would be. And somehow, over the course of the conversation, she found herself realizing just how silly she had been. The relationship was never going to work out. She and Lance were never meant to be. Why had she even done this in the first place? The Professor was right. She had to end this right away.

And now I feel that I don't have to be afraid

So this 6-month anniversary was going to be extra special, because she was going to break up with Lance. And it was for real this time. Nobody- Rogue, or anybody else, could stop her. It was for the best.

But if it was for the best, then why was Kitty feeling such apprehension? She faltered in her application of makeup, and stopped to look her blue-eyed reflection in the mirror. After all, something that felt so good couldn't be all that bad, now could it?

Ain't it funny how some feelings you just can't deny
And you can't move on even though you try
Ain't it strange when you're feeling things you shouldn't feel
Oh, I wish this could be real

The pause of regret grew, and grew, until it became more than just regret, and was transformed into a longing. A longing that this could be real, that she could really be with Lance, and that she would be able to carry out what her heart desired.

 
Ain't it funny how a moment could just change your life
And you don't want to face what's wrong or right
Ain't if strange how fate can play a part
In the story of your heart

But this was wrong. The Professor said so!! And she had to do what was right for her. After all, the Professor only wanted what was best for her. For the both of them.

I locked away my heart but you just set it free
Emotions I felt held me back from what my life should be
I pushed you far away and yet you stayed with me
I guess this means that you and me were meant to be

"Were we meant to be?" Whispered Kitty softly to her reflection. She couldn't decide, and the sad blue eyes of the reflection simply stared back at her, wordless.

Just then, her reverie was broken by Jean, who had stuck her head in the door. She grinned at Kitty, and beckoned to her. "Come on, Kitty!! Your Prince Charming's waiting downstairs for you."

Kitty grinned slowly, and nodded at her friend. "Ok. Tell him I'll be right down." With that, Jean closed the door again, and Kitty could hear her footsteps as she walked away from her room. All was quiet again, as Kitty was left to her thoughts.

And in the silence, Kitty made her decision. She had to do what was right.

Ain't it funny how some feelings you just can't deny
And you can't move on even though you try
Ain't it strange when you're feeling things you shouldn't feel
Oh, I wish this could be real
Ain't it funny how a moment could just change your life
And you don't want to face what's wrong or right
Ain't if strange how fate can play a part
In the story of your heart

Because the Professor said so.

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Author's Note:

I just managed to borrow the J.Lo CD from my pal, and just listening to this song made me think a little of Kitty and Lance, especially with the whole "It-really-wasn't-meant-to-be" thing. Ewan just whispered "Why not?" in my ear, and I was game. It was originally supposed to just be a straightforward Lance/Kitty thing, but then Ewan started putting some more ideas in my head, about how I could twist this around and make into a more… sinister thing than it appeared to be.

Read and review, if only to give me some constructive criticism, and who knows? Maybe Ewan'll get me to write some more!! J