Chapter Eighteen:
Gwen tapped her fingers nervously on the tabletop. She didn't know what possessed her to do this. After all this time. Where was he? He'd promised to meet her here this afternoon. She looked at her watch. He was late. Five minutes to be exact. A war raged in her head as she debated whether or not to give him five more minutes. She was so busy silently arguing back and forth with herself that she didn't notice his presence. Until he cleared his throat.
"Gwen," he said. Politely. Curiousity lacing his voice. "Ethan," she breathed, getting to her feet. Standing there awkwardly. Wondering what to say. Trying to force something to come out of her mouth. Anything. WHY had she done this? she wondered again. Asked him to meet her. She didn't know why. She just felt it was something she needed to do. Something a long time coming. "Would you like to sit?" she finally asked. He looked wary as he settled opposite her.
She opened her mouth to speak, but the words stuck in her throat. "Want some coffee?" she forced out. That wasn't what she wanted to say. Not that at all. "Okay," he agreed. Answering her slowly. They gave their orders to Beth. Not making eye contact with each other until she was gone. Ethan waited until Beth set their steaming mugs of coffee in front of them and left to go back to the counter before he asked, "Why did you call me, Gwen? After all this time. What is it you want?"
She reached within herself. Deep within herself and said the words she knew needed to be said if she were ever to be free. "Ethan," she began haltingly. "Ethan, I asked you to come here today so I could say goodbye to you." Ethan's brow furrowed in confusion as he said, "What are you talking about Gwen? We already said our goodbyes. Years ago. When you told me you had had enough and wanted nothing more to do with me."
"Yes," she said. Her voice gaining strength. Her words more forceful. "At least I thought I had. But I realize now, that I was lying to myself. The truth is, I've never let go, Ethan. I've never let go of the memory of our time together. Over ten years, Ethan. Over half my life I loved you. Letting go of you was harder than I thought. Hanging on to that memory has kept me from being happy. Truly happy."
"Gwen, I'm so sorry. I was a jerk. I see that now. I never meant to hurt you. Either of you," he said quietly. She smiled sadly at him as she covered his hand with her own and said, "You weren't always such a jerk, Ethan Crane. You used to be the most wonderful man in the world to me. I loved you. I think a small part of me always will." Ethan looked up into her eyes and saw the sadness in the them. The sadness he had caused.
"But only a small part. My heart belongs to someone else now. My son. Jake is the love of my life, Ethan. And if you hadn't been such a jerk," she said with a smile, "I wouldn't have him in my life. I guess what I'm trying to say, Ethan, is thank you." "What?" Ethan said in disbelief. "Did I hear you right?" "Oh, you heard me right, Ethan, so wipe that stunned look of your face," she said with a laugh. "Yes, I'm thanking you for being a jerk. Stranger things have been known to happen."
"Gwen," he started. But realized he no longer had her attention. Her whole face brightened with a smile. And her eyes shone with happiness. Love. He turned around slowly to see what made her so happy. Eyes landing on two people who had just walked through the Book Cafe's entrance. Two remarkably similar figures. Jake Bennett was the mirror-image of his father. He saw Hank's eyes narrow as they settled on him. Then shift to Gwen in concern. He turned back to meet Gwen's gaze. "So this is goodbye? Goodbye, Gwen. I always valued your friendship. Maybe we can be friends again someday. I wish you all the happiness you deserve."
Gwen rose to her feet and hugged him. For the last time. And sighed in relief. Finally. Finally, she had closure. She waved to him as he walked away. Watched as he said something indistinguishable to Hank. Said hi to her son. Then he was gone. Gone from her life forever. She thanked Beth as she passed her. Smiling warmly at her. And walked up to the two most important men in her life. Then she took one of Jake's hands as Hank took the other. And together they walked out the door.
Gwen tapped her fingers nervously on the tabletop. She didn't know what possessed her to do this. After all this time. Where was he? He'd promised to meet her here this afternoon. She looked at her watch. He was late. Five minutes to be exact. A war raged in her head as she debated whether or not to give him five more minutes. She was so busy silently arguing back and forth with herself that she didn't notice his presence. Until he cleared his throat.
"Gwen," he said. Politely. Curiousity lacing his voice. "Ethan," she breathed, getting to her feet. Standing there awkwardly. Wondering what to say. Trying to force something to come out of her mouth. Anything. WHY had she done this? she wondered again. Asked him to meet her. She didn't know why. She just felt it was something she needed to do. Something a long time coming. "Would you like to sit?" she finally asked. He looked wary as he settled opposite her.
She opened her mouth to speak, but the words stuck in her throat. "Want some coffee?" she forced out. That wasn't what she wanted to say. Not that at all. "Okay," he agreed. Answering her slowly. They gave their orders to Beth. Not making eye contact with each other until she was gone. Ethan waited until Beth set their steaming mugs of coffee in front of them and left to go back to the counter before he asked, "Why did you call me, Gwen? After all this time. What is it you want?"
She reached within herself. Deep within herself and said the words she knew needed to be said if she were ever to be free. "Ethan," she began haltingly. "Ethan, I asked you to come here today so I could say goodbye to you." Ethan's brow furrowed in confusion as he said, "What are you talking about Gwen? We already said our goodbyes. Years ago. When you told me you had had enough and wanted nothing more to do with me."
"Yes," she said. Her voice gaining strength. Her words more forceful. "At least I thought I had. But I realize now, that I was lying to myself. The truth is, I've never let go, Ethan. I've never let go of the memory of our time together. Over ten years, Ethan. Over half my life I loved you. Letting go of you was harder than I thought. Hanging on to that memory has kept me from being happy. Truly happy."
"Gwen, I'm so sorry. I was a jerk. I see that now. I never meant to hurt you. Either of you," he said quietly. She smiled sadly at him as she covered his hand with her own and said, "You weren't always such a jerk, Ethan Crane. You used to be the most wonderful man in the world to me. I loved you. I think a small part of me always will." Ethan looked up into her eyes and saw the sadness in the them. The sadness he had caused.
"But only a small part. My heart belongs to someone else now. My son. Jake is the love of my life, Ethan. And if you hadn't been such a jerk," she said with a smile, "I wouldn't have him in my life. I guess what I'm trying to say, Ethan, is thank you." "What?" Ethan said in disbelief. "Did I hear you right?" "Oh, you heard me right, Ethan, so wipe that stunned look of your face," she said with a laugh. "Yes, I'm thanking you for being a jerk. Stranger things have been known to happen."
"Gwen," he started. But realized he no longer had her attention. Her whole face brightened with a smile. And her eyes shone with happiness. Love. He turned around slowly to see what made her so happy. Eyes landing on two people who had just walked through the Book Cafe's entrance. Two remarkably similar figures. Jake Bennett was the mirror-image of his father. He saw Hank's eyes narrow as they settled on him. Then shift to Gwen in concern. He turned back to meet Gwen's gaze. "So this is goodbye? Goodbye, Gwen. I always valued your friendship. Maybe we can be friends again someday. I wish you all the happiness you deserve."
Gwen rose to her feet and hugged him. For the last time. And sighed in relief. Finally. Finally, she had closure. She waved to him as he walked away. Watched as he said something indistinguishable to Hank. Said hi to her son. Then he was gone. Gone from her life forever. She thanked Beth as she passed her. Smiling warmly at her. And walked up to the two most important men in her life. Then she took one of Jake's hands as Hank took the other. And together they walked out the door.