Chapter Nineteen:
"You know," she said, looking into his gray eyes, "you could have just told me the truth. That it was just going to be the three of us." He stuffed his hands in his pockets and turned around. He couldn't look at her. He felt guilty for misleading her. The trip to Boston wasn't just a way to spend time with her. He wanted to show Josh a good time. He really admired the kid's toughness. He was so sick. But he was a fighter. Just like Jenny.
He decided to tell her the truth. Not an easy decision. But the right decision. He turned when he felt her hand on his arm and met her blue eyes. "Jenny. I'm sorry. It was wrong of me. I know that. But the truth of the matter is..." He paused. Unsure of how to go on. Afraid of her reaction. "What? You can tell me. Anything. I won't judge you." She implored him to open up to her. Be honest.
"Okay. I'll tell you the truth," he said. "I knew if I told you that it was just me, you, and Josh, you probably wouldn't have agreed to go. You would have turned me down. And I wouldn't have blamed you. You don't really know me. And for all the time I cared for you as your doctor, I guess I don't really know you. But I do know that you're a beautiful person. Inside and out. I like to spend time with you. You make me happy."
He went on. Despite the look of astonishment on her face. He had to get it all out. "So I invited Josh. Got the okay from his mother. Josh really loves you, you know?" She smiled at the mention of the little boy who had stolen her heart. "I really love him, too. He's so brave," she said softly. "At first it was just because I wanted to make sure you didn't back out on me. But the more I got to know him, really know him, the more I liked him. I want to do something good for him, Jenny. And if you still want to go with us, well...that's just an added bonus."
They stood there. Neither saying a word. He ridiculed himself for being so stupid. For scaring her away. "I'm sorry," he said gruffly as he walked past her and back down the hall toward Josh's hospital room. "I'll go tell Josh you can't go." She stayed rooted to the spot. Dazed. She hadn't known he cared for her so. Only that he was a good and kind man. All the nurses loved him. He was well-liked. It never occurred to her his feelings went further than concern of a doctor for his patient.
She waited a few more minutes before she went after him. Went to Josh's room. Entered quietly. Careful not to disturb their fun. Their card game. "Hey, Jenny. I'm beating Dr. Nick. He's so bad at cards. You're much better." She returned his smile and crossed the distance to stand by his side. Her eyes stayed locked with Nick's as she said, "How are my two friends doing today?" Understanding--and a tiny, momentary flicker of disappointment--washed over Nick's face. Josh, however, beamed at her and said, "Great! I'm really looking forward to going to Boston with you guys. We're going to have so much fun. Even if Dr. Griffin gave me a lecture on what to do and not to do." She listened to his excited chatter. Praying she hadn't lost Nick. He was an important person in her life. A dear friend. She only hoped that was enough.
"You know," she said, looking into his gray eyes, "you could have just told me the truth. That it was just going to be the three of us." He stuffed his hands in his pockets and turned around. He couldn't look at her. He felt guilty for misleading her. The trip to Boston wasn't just a way to spend time with her. He wanted to show Josh a good time. He really admired the kid's toughness. He was so sick. But he was a fighter. Just like Jenny.
He decided to tell her the truth. Not an easy decision. But the right decision. He turned when he felt her hand on his arm and met her blue eyes. "Jenny. I'm sorry. It was wrong of me. I know that. But the truth of the matter is..." He paused. Unsure of how to go on. Afraid of her reaction. "What? You can tell me. Anything. I won't judge you." She implored him to open up to her. Be honest.
"Okay. I'll tell you the truth," he said. "I knew if I told you that it was just me, you, and Josh, you probably wouldn't have agreed to go. You would have turned me down. And I wouldn't have blamed you. You don't really know me. And for all the time I cared for you as your doctor, I guess I don't really know you. But I do know that you're a beautiful person. Inside and out. I like to spend time with you. You make me happy."
He went on. Despite the look of astonishment on her face. He had to get it all out. "So I invited Josh. Got the okay from his mother. Josh really loves you, you know?" She smiled at the mention of the little boy who had stolen her heart. "I really love him, too. He's so brave," she said softly. "At first it was just because I wanted to make sure you didn't back out on me. But the more I got to know him, really know him, the more I liked him. I want to do something good for him, Jenny. And if you still want to go with us, well...that's just an added bonus."
They stood there. Neither saying a word. He ridiculed himself for being so stupid. For scaring her away. "I'm sorry," he said gruffly as he walked past her and back down the hall toward Josh's hospital room. "I'll go tell Josh you can't go." She stayed rooted to the spot. Dazed. She hadn't known he cared for her so. Only that he was a good and kind man. All the nurses loved him. He was well-liked. It never occurred to her his feelings went further than concern of a doctor for his patient.
She waited a few more minutes before she went after him. Went to Josh's room. Entered quietly. Careful not to disturb their fun. Their card game. "Hey, Jenny. I'm beating Dr. Nick. He's so bad at cards. You're much better." She returned his smile and crossed the distance to stand by his side. Her eyes stayed locked with Nick's as she said, "How are my two friends doing today?" Understanding--and a tiny, momentary flicker of disappointment--washed over Nick's face. Josh, however, beamed at her and said, "Great! I'm really looking forward to going to Boston with you guys. We're going to have so much fun. Even if Dr. Griffin gave me a lecture on what to do and not to do." She listened to his excited chatter. Praying she hadn't lost Nick. He was an important person in her life. A dear friend. She only hoped that was enough.