Woohoo! Who just scored all of Weiss Kreuz for $15 on ebay? It's all me baby! Oh…um, Jade, don't tell mom. I don't want her to be all like "How could you go on there? Who knows what kind of people you're dealing with! How do you know they aren't just out to rip you off!" Seriously, like I'd cry if someone ripped me off for that little. I think the risk is well worth it for those lovable bishie boys and their flowershop/assassinating ways of joy! Oh…okay, I'm getting kinda off topic, aren't I? Sorry, I was just…so pleased with myself. Okay, enough of my self-important babble! It's time for some writing! Oh, and just a warning: I'm getting antsy, so this chapter's gonna start right off with pointless, useless fluffy goodness. No, not the kind with a tail and a weird little…thing for a retainer who is mysteriously controlled by Rin Cuteness Power, I mean the kind with all that mush. Yeah, so…be warned.
P.S. Agent Kodama would most definitely approve of pointless fluff, wouldn't she?
*****
All I Needed Was You
Part 11
*****
I cannot help it
I couldn't stop it if I tried
The same old heartbeat fills
The emptiness I have inside
And I've heard that you can't fight love
So I won't complain
Cause why would I stop
The fire that keeps me going on
Cause when there's you, I feel whole
And there's no better feeling in the world
But without you I'm alone
And I'd rather be in love with you.
-Michelle Branch I'd Rather Be In Love
"Sango," a whisper woke the woman, warm breath on her cheek and a scent that put her at ease immediately. She snuggled back into her husband's arms, blinking drearily.
"Miroku, I'm sleeping." She told him, attempting to close her eyes again, but knowing already that it was futile. He had that tone in his voice. That tone that meant either one of two things. Whichever it was, she wouldn't be getting any sleep for a while, no matter how she protested.
"But Sango," he was pouting, she could tell without opening her eyes. "I wanted to talk to you, love." Heaving a highly exaggerated sigh, Sango rolled over to face him, blinking her deep maroon eyes in an attempt to become more fully awake.
"Alright then." She reached up casually to brush her fingers through his hair in a fruitless attempt to keep it out of his face. "What is it that can't wait until morning?"
"It's about tomorrow." He told her, sounding a bit uneasy.
"Don't worry, sweetheart. You know that Asako's more than ready to deal with some low class scorpion youkai." Sango assured him. "I know I seemed worried before, but that's just…I'm a mother and I can't help worrying over things, no matter how silly they are."
"It's not those youkai that I'm worried about her dealing with." Miroku's voice became very solemn, and Sango, still a bit tired, wasn't sure what he was talking about.
"But…I thought that only one group of youkai was bothering the village?" Sango's voice was full of confusion. Miroku didn't speak, but her body suddenly grew tense next to his when realization dawned on her. "Oh…that youkai…"
"Yes, Shippo." Miroku confirmed the direction of her thoughts. "He's grown up here with us, Sango, almost as though he was our own child. It's hard to remember that someone like Shippo is actually a full-blooded youkai. He seems tame and human to us, but Shippo…especially at this age…he's more at the mercies of his instincts than Inuyasha ever was. And I'm sure you haven't forgotten when Inuyasha's instincts almost overpowered him when he was first with Kagome? That memory still haunts him though she's forgiven him a thousand times I'm sure. And Inuyasha has been very careful always to control his instincts."
"But…Miroku, that was different." Sango was suddenly beginning to feel a bit nervous about this as well. "First of all, Inuyasha was…and Shippo would never hurt Asako…"
"Maybe, but we thought as much about Inuyasha and Kagome." Miroku told her. "And don't try to tell me that it isn't like that between Shippo and Asako, because you know it's obvious to anyone that she worships him and he completely adores her. They're almost worse than another pair I remember from not so long ago."
"I see what you mean. Shippo obviously is having a hard time coping with his feelings. It's almost as if he thinks there's something wrong with seeing the girl who was once his sister in that light." Sango chuckled lightly. "Damn men and their denial."
"What? I was never that way." Miroku protested. "If anything, I was overly obvious with my affections."
"You know what I mean, Mr. Noble Self Sacrifice." Sango teased him. "Why, just thinking about you and your idiotic ways still gets me worked up."
"Does it now?" Miroku teased back, his hand "accidentally" sliding down on her hips. Sango giggled, batting at his hand to no avail.
"Stop, Miroku, you know what I mean." She scolded him, her authority a bit undermined by the giggling. "I thought we were talking. Or did you change your mind?"
"Oh…you distracted me," Miroku smirked at her, his eyes gleaming in the dark, "evil temptress. You live to tease me, even after all this time."
"I have never—well maybe a bit…wait, we're getting off the topic." Sango blushed and buried her face in his chest to hide the color of her cheeks.
"Too true." Miroku sighed in contentment, smoothing her hair down with the hand that wasn't still lingering dangerously low on her hip. Sango chose to ignore the slight misbehavior. After all, some habits could never be broken, it seemed. "As I was saying, it's obvious that Shippo has some pent up issues that he needs to deal with, and much as I'm sure he'd never intend for it to happen, the two of them traveling alone…it's too much for him to resist. And if something starts innocently, there's no guarantee that those instincts won't take over."
"But Miroku, I trust Shippo completely with Asako." She sighed, enjoying how he was stroking down her hair. It was very relaxing, though it did make it hard for her to concentrate on the topic at hand.
"As do I, dear." Miroku concurred. "I just don't trust him with himself."
"So you think he won't be able to control himself alone with Asako?" Sango was definitely seeing how this could worry Miroku.
"I'm just worried…I mean, I trust Shippo with her." Miroku clarified. "I don't have a problem with the two of them being together. In fact, I can think of no one I'd trust Asako with more than Shippo. But what if…what happened to Inuyasha…what if it happens to him? And what if he can't stop himself?"
"Dearest, that's perfectly understandable, but you have to know that Asako is…well, Kagome was strong when it came to her untamed magical powers, but Asako is a trained fighter. She can handle herself with Shippo. Those two have been wrestling partners for ages. And besides, you realize what stopped Inuyasha from hurting Kagome?" Sango didn't wait for an answer. "He loves her, Miroku. We both know it. And love is something much stronger than any sort of youkai instincts. You know how that girl Rin changed Sesshoumaru. And she was human as well, with no obvious power as a fighter or a priestess that I know of. If she can stand up to a full blooded dog youkai of that power, I'm sure that our Asako will have no problems with Shippo."
"I…I guess you're right." Miroku agreed slowly, holding her close.
"Of course I am," Sango moved her head to kiss Miroku's throat softly. "I'm your wife. I'm always right."
"I seem to keep forgetting that somehow." Miroku laughed slightly. "How silly of me."
"Indeed." Sango cuddled against him and let her eyelids droop shut. "Now lets go to sleep."
"But Sango," and there it was again, that tone. Sango would have laughed if she didn't want to appear neutral. "I'm not tired yet." And there went that damn hand again. Sango sighed in mock exasperation.
"Miroku, how do I ever get any rest with you around?" she asked, but she was already leaning in to his embrace, and she didn't shy away from his touch.
"I don't know." Miroku answered before lowering his head for a kiss. "But I'll have to work on that."
"Mm, maybe later." Sango replied, returning his kisses.
----------
"And take this too," Sango handed her daughter a large packet of dried fish. "With the river so close, we hardly have need for these here and they'd be good for snacks." Sango disappeared back into the underground food store while Asako searched for a place in her sack for the oversized packet. Shippo smiled sympathetically at her as Sango reappeared. Noting her daughter's overstuffed sack, courtesy of her motherly concern, Sango went for Shippo instead. "And here, you'll need some more fruit I'm sure, so take these figs. They're very freshly dried. And here's some salt and a few more herbs. This one's for headaches and if you boil this it makes a good poultice and this is for fatigue and this one you chew on if you run out of water and—"
"Really, mom! Calm down! It's not like we're going on a yearlong foray through the desert! The village is only three days away and I hardly think a headache will prove life threatening on the way!" Asako could not take it anymore. From the porch where the others were watching, Shippo thought he heard muffled laughter, but when he looked, he could only see Kagome glaring at her husband viciously as she could while trying not to laugh herself. Aiko was watching it all with fascination and Miroku kept glancing nervously between Shippo and Asako and then licking his lips. "And we're not going to be able to eat this much food in a month, much less a week! You need to stop worrying."
"Oh…I know it! It's just…oh, look at you Asako!" Sango was obviously on the verge of tears and Miroku looked more worried than ever. Kagome seemed to think it was all very sweet, but Aiko rolled her eyes, as did her father. "You're all grown up and I just…I never thought I'd see the day when you and Shippo…and oh Shippo! Look at you! I remember when you used to ride in Kagome's bike basket and not even reach my knee and now…you both are so…oh!" Sango dragged her daughter and the dumbfounded kitsune together for a group hug, with her nearly crushing the others as they wore overly indulgent expressions.
"Oh, come off it mom." Asako smiled at her mother after being released. "I'm not that old yet, you know?" she sighed as her mother nodded emphatically.
"No, no you aren't, and yet…to think how far both of you have come. Oh, I just…" Sango sighed loudly and shook her head as though she couldn't believe it was truly her daughter standing before her. "Just…just take care, will you? Both of you. You're both my children, you know that?"
"Yeah mom." Shippo teased before giving Sango another hug. "I'll be careful. And I'll watch over her." He whispered in Sango's ear. She nodded, pride shining in her eyes as she turned to hug Asako once more. Everyone took this as a signal that it was time for farewells and made their way over.
"You two will do just fine, I know it." Kagome told them before hugging them both and smiling encouragement. As she was hugging Shippo, she whispered to him. "You're my son too, you know? You are very dear to all of us and we all believe in you." Shippo hugged her tightly before letting her move on.
"Hey, Shippo, don't do anything stupid." Inuyasha sounded serious, but he was smiling teasingly. "It'll piss me off if it gets out that I trained you and you couldn't fight for shit." He hesitated momentarily before hugging the kitsune. "Seriously, I know you'll be fine, and Asako too, but just…remember what I warned you about, okay?" Shippo nodded, blushing.
"Watch out for my daughter, will you?" Miroku gave him a nervous grin as he tried not to appear worried. "And…and yourself too. Just…be careful all the time. Promise you'll watch out for…things." He finished vaguely.
"Uh…yeah, I'll do that." Shippo shrugged, unsure of what to say. Aiko came last and she didn't seem worried for him in the least.
"Bring me back a piece of it, okay?" she asked, golden eyes gleaming in enthusiasm as she spoke to the two new demon hunters. "And you have to tell me all about it, promise?"
"Yeah, it's a deal Aiko." Asako shook hands with the other girl, both of them grinning eagerly. Shippo couldn't believe this. He'd thought Inuyasha enjoyed fighting, but these women…they were insane.
"You ready then?" Shippo asked Asako she nodded curtly, adjusting Hiraikotsu on her shoulder and they waved at everyone before starting toward the forest. Behind them, they could hear Aiko trying to convince her parents that she should be allowed to kill youkai as well, even though she hadn't ever trained the way Asako and Shippo had. Shippo smiled slightly as the sound of Kagome's loud and vehement protests faded into the distance.
"What's funny?" Asako asked him and he shook his head.
"Oh, it's just Aiko back there. She's so excited but I guess when you've never experienced real battle then…" Shippo drifted off as he realized that Asako had never been in a real battle either. "Oh, sorry, I just forgot that you haven't either…I mean, we've trained so long."
"I was always so jealous when mom would let you take some of her jobs." Asako sighed. "And now I'm finally the one that's going off to fight youkai."
"It's not fun." Shippo told her.
"I know…it's just that I've trained so long. Like you said, you know?" she smiled at him, her purple eyes flashing with laughter and causing Shippo's breath to catch in his throat.
Gods, she's so beautiful he stared at her profile as they continued to walk in silence. They shouldn't make women that beautiful, it's just cruel. I mean, the way her hair kind of ripples in the light…and how her lower lip juts out in a little pout without her even trying…
"Something wrong?" Asako looked back over at him after they had been walking some time. "You've been staring at me for nearly an hour now." Shippo turned red instantly and stared intently at the ground.
"That long huh? You'd have thought I'd trip on something." Shippo chuckled nervously. Stupid! You're so stupid! You practically admitted to staring! Stupid stupid stupid! He berated himself silently.
"Uh…yeah." Asako quirked an eyebrow at him curiously. "Yeah you were…so…"
"Oh no, nothing's wrong! Just like looking at you sometimes!" he answered, obviously nervous still. As soon as the words left his mouth, Shippo cringed at them. That was even worse than before! Next thing you know she'll ask if you want some fish and you'll blurt out that you love her! What, are you the biggest moron to ever live? What's your problem!
"Uh…huh…well then." Asako seemed to be blushing, but Shippo couldn't be sure. He was too busy staring at his feet and telling himself off.
----------
"Shippo, what are you staring at?" Asako yawned from under their blankets on the other side of the fire. Shippo had his back to her, and was being very careful to keep his distance from the girl, but she seemed completely opposed to that idea. In fact, she seemed to be running some sort of campaign to make things harder than they were originally for him. As they walked on the dust road through the forest, Shippo had tried to walk all the way on the edge furthest from her, but she seemed to think he was playing some kind of game. When she caught him, she had insisted on walking the rest of the day with their arms linked "so he couldn't escape again." That had been terrible, with her soft scent wafting into his nostrils all the time, and when he'd noticed that his elbow was basically pressing into her breast, his face had gone so red, she'd asked if he was feeling tired.
Later, when they decided to stop for the night, he'd wandered off alone to gather sticks, but she had followed him to help, going on about how great it was to camp out like they used to when they were younger, except with no adults to give them bedtimes. Shippo wished there were adults there. Oh, how he wished for them. Then when he had been boiling some of the fish with some roots and grasses, he'd tried to sit across the fire from her, but Asako had simply moved to be next to him, helping to shred the roots he'd found as they sat in a silence so comfortable and yet so tense that Shippo had nearly given up and just hugged her at least five times. After dinner, they had talked a bit before she decided it was time for sleep. Shippo's newest plan was to simply stand on watch all evening so he wouldn't have to do what he knew she expected, since they were camping after all. Just like when they were younger.
"Shippo, come to bed. I'm cold over here! You know it's not half as fun when I have to freeze by myself." Asako pouted, shivering slightly. Knowing Asako, she probably was freezing, but he couldn't just sleep with her! It would be…difficult. Very difficult.
"I'm keeping watch. Who knows what's out there?" Shippo justified himself, but Asako would have none of it.
"That's trash. You know that we'll both wake up if something happens! We never had to keep watch when we went camping." She shot out.
"We're not going camping. We're grown up now, Asako. You know that." Shippo told her in exasperation. Silence was his response. And more silence. Had she simply given up and gone to sleep? Shippo turned when he heard some rustling and his eyes were greeted with a very hurt looking Asako depositing his blankets beside him before going back to her own.
"Fine, if you're so dead bent on staying away from me for this entire trip, be that way." She huffed as she scooted her now depleted blankets close to the fire as she deemed safe and climbed inside, obviously repressing her shivers. "I don't know why it is that you've been so strange lately, but…if it's something I did then I wish you'd just tell me. I had thought that this trip would make you forget whatever it was that was bothering you, and we could be…just like we were. But I guess not."
"Asako…" Shippo winced. This had not been his aim at all.
"You know, there's only so far you can push me." Asako told him angrily. "If you want to hate me, that's just fine. But don't expect any more effort from me to fix things."
"I don't…" Shippo sighed. Maybe…maybe if she thought that he was mad at her then all of this would be better. Maybe then he wouldn't have to worry so much about how much he loved her and—
Wait a second. Wait just one second Shippo gasped as he felt something hit him in the chest so hard he felt like he'd fall back into the fire. I think maybe…no, I know it. I love her. Well dammit. All that work for nothing. I do love her after all. Now what am I supposed to do? Wait…is she…she can't be…crying? Shippo groaned as he realized that Asako's form was shaking silently, but in a fashion that was completely unmistakable. Great. She's freezing, crying, and she thinks I hate her, when really I'm in love with her. This is great. I'm amazing.
Sighing in defeat. Shippo scooped up his blankets and trudged around the fire to where Asako was rolled in a tight ball under her blankets, sobbing silently and shivering obviously. As though I could feel like a little more of a bastard. Shippo frowned in concern at the girl, gently covering her with his own blankets before climbing under them next to her. She only started to cry harder at that, pulling away from him even though he hadn't touched her. "Asako…" he began once more, reaching his hand over to her freezing arm, but she jerked away.
"Why won't you…just leave me alone then?" she managed between sobs. "If you can't…stand me then…just leave me alone."
"Asako, please." Shippo heaved a great sigh as he realized he was going to offer an explanation for all this. That made him feel almost worse than before. "Please, I don't hate you. Don't be silly."
"I'm not being silly! You've been acting weird for almost a month now! You keep looking at me strangely and…I don't know. It's just…confusing. I wish you'd just tell me you're sick of me and finish it. I mean, I know you said you were having a problem with me so…" She sobbed.
"Asako, I don't hate you, I swear! And my problem…wasn't like that. Just…just come here." Shippo pulled her toward him. "You're freezing and you need to warm up, so come on."
"But before…on the road…and with the firewood…and dinner." Asako's sobs subsided into small sniffles. "You were so…so cold to me. You keep avoiding me like you just can't stand to look at me. And before, you stared at me like there was something wrong with me. I just…I just don't want…"
"Asako, please, come over here." He urged her gently. "You aren't going to get any warmer over at the edge by yourself. Just…come on." Asako sniffled once more before letting him pull her to him. He wrapped his arms around her slender body, trying to warm her as quickly as he could. "Isn't that better?"
"Yeah." Her voice was empty though. She didn't believe him, and he knew he'd have to tell her the truth.
"Asako, the reason…why I've been strange…it's not your fault." He told her, rubbing her cold arms to work the blood through them better. She was warming up well now that they were both under the blankets, but he still felt guilty about all of it. "It's not your fault at all. It's mine."
"But what did I do that—"
"Dammit, Asako, I love you!" Shippo blurted it out without thinking, so frustrated with Asako blaming herself that the words just came out. The words made his cheeks glow red in embarrassment as her body suddenly became stiff next to him. Oh well, it was too late now. "Sorry. I didn't mean to…it's just…that's why I keep staring at you. But I wasn't sure and it was confusing. I thought it would go away if I just avoided you. I didn't want anything to happen…you know." Shippo knew that he'd never blushed more in his entire life, but he couldn't help it. Here he was, cuddling with a girl and telling her he loved her! This had definitely not been part of his plan.
"Shippo." She answered after a few moments of total silence. She heaved a great sigh and glared at him before starting to hit his chest in a repeated flurry of fists and slaps.
"Agh! What the!" Shippo finally let go of her, and she leapt from the blankets as though burned. "Asako, why'd you hit me!?"
"It wasn't funny!" she pointed at him angrily. "What you said! It wasn't funny at all!"
"What are you talking about?" Shippo was quite sure that he'd never understand women, and he'd known this one her whole life. Ridiculous.
"You said…said those words…but I know that you don't! You told me years ago that…we could never be together! I felt like it would be okay if I just loved you quietly, without saying anything ever again, but now…now you mock me!" she shouted as he stumbled out of the blankets.
"Asako! What are you saying? I wouldn't tell you I loved you if I didn't!" Shippo shouted back, exasperated beyond belief with how little sense she was making. "I love you, I love you, I love you! Are you satisfied? I've spent so much time trying not to, thinking you'd never love me back, and now you think I'm lying when I finally can't fight it anymore? Dammit, Asako!"
"I can't believe you if you ju—mmph!" Asako's rebuttal was cut off by Shippo, who growled in frustration before simply lunging forward to kiss her. At first he wasn't sure why he did it, whether to shut her up or convince her or simply because of the way the firelight danced in her eyes and made her look like some beautiful goddess of justice. But after a few moments of standing with their lips pressed together, hers began to melt against his, even pressing forward, if a bit hesitantly. And by that time, he'd stopped caring why he kissed her. He was too busy concentrating on the feel of it, the heat of her lips on his, her trembling hands finding their way around his neck, her sweet scent filling his world with a giddy sort of feeling he'd never known before. All of it was so good, so right; the only question he could concentrate on was why he hadn't done this before. After a while, he finally pulled away, his hands still gripping her shoulders firmly. "Shippo." She gasped finally, her shaking hands going back to her lips as though trying to feel for proof of the kiss.
"You're shaking." He told her, his voice strangely calm. He'd just kissed her and now he was calm? Dammit, why hadn't he just kissed her before? Stupid Inuyasha. He always had to be right.
"I am?" she looked down at her own hands and gave him a shaky half grin. "I guess I'm kind of surprised…you kissed me."
"I love you." Shippo repeated what he'd been trying to tell her before. "Of course I kissed you."
"I suppose that's right…" Asako gave him a goofy sort of adorable grin. "I guess I didn't believe you…but that…I felt it."
"I told you so." Shippo couldn't resist sticking his tongue out at her, dropping his hands. "Now, ready to get some sleep?"
"Uh…yeah." Asako looked at the blankets and then back at Shippo, blushing brightly. "You won't…um…"
"Of course not. You know I wouldn't, Asako." Shippo sighed, hoping he was half as sure as he sounded. Asako seemed to believe him though. She nodded and they both climbed back into the blankets. Asako snuggled into Shippo's arms and giggled slightly. "What's so funny?"
"It's just…we did this when we were kids." She told him. "But it's so different now, you know?"
"I know." Shippo blushed slightly. "I definitely know."
*****
The End (Of Part 11, That Is)