1 Memories of Bitter Pain
By: I Am Shinigami
Squall sighed and headed back to his dorm. Ever since Seifer had come back to Garden one month after Ultimacia's defeat it was as though Squall was a distant memory to everyone around him. It didn't matter to them that Seifer was the Sorceress' knight or that only months before he'd tormented them as head of the Disciplinary Committee. Instead that seemed to make his friendship even more desirable and so the people that had once promised him that he would never be left behind again had abandoned him for the second time.
Once again he was left alone with only himself for company. What hurt the most was that this time he wasn't sure why they left. He couldn't blame it on his mask of cold indifference because it had cracked long ago. That was why he faced despair, without his mask he had nothing to hide behind and no protection against the bitter truth. They had left because he wasn't good enough. He wasn't arrogant enough to believe that he deserved friends but he had thought it would last a little longer, all he really wanted were memories. Memories of happiness and contentment; was that so much to ask?
After spending so much of his life alone it shouldn't have been so hard to readjust to the familiar rhythm. Instead he found it beating down on him each day, he felt as though soon there wouldn't be anything left. Only an empty shell that hunted and stalked in the shadows.
The golden haired boy had enchanted even the president of Esthar, Laguna Loire. He saw them now, walking past him towards the gardens. Laughing and swapping jokes as though they were father and son. Their laughter reached him even as he hid behind a giant oak tree and he clenched his hands into fists and finally admitted his true problem. He was furious that all his comrades, siblings even, had deserted him.
He didn't know why they left, what was it about him that was so appalling? Rinoa, his princess (A/N He refers to her as that because he thinks she's pure, untouched and untainted by greed and corruption), had looked at him in scorn the time she had talked to him. She had shattered all his illusions in one single day, even now he remembered her mocking laughter as she caressed his scar with gentle hands.
~Flashback~
TBC…
Sorry about the cliffhanger but it's 12:47am and I need to finish the first chapter of my GW fic and I'm not quite sure what to write next…but there will be a Rinoa bastardization (not that I like her anyways).
Anyway I don't own FFVIII (no shit!) it belongs to Squaresoft (if I did own ff8 several FMVs would have been dedicated to Squall and Seifer screwing like easter bunnies…did I actually write that?).
To continue I need at least 1 review…hope you like (this will be a SeiferxSquall and it won't be a deathfic…I love happy endings ^_^ with Rinoa dying…slowly…painfully etc.)
By: I Am Shinigami
Squall sighed and headed back to his dorm. Ever since Seifer had come back to Garden one month after Ultimacia's defeat it was as though Squall was a distant memory to everyone around him. It didn't matter to them that Seifer was the Sorceress' knight or that only months before he'd tormented them as head of the Disciplinary Committee. Instead that seemed to make his friendship even more desirable and so the people that had once promised him that he would never be left behind again had abandoned him for the second time.
Once again he was left alone with only himself for company. What hurt the most was that this time he wasn't sure why they left. He couldn't blame it on his mask of cold indifference because it had cracked long ago. That was why he faced despair, without his mask he had nothing to hide behind and no protection against the bitter truth. They had left because he wasn't good enough. He wasn't arrogant enough to believe that he deserved friends but he had thought it would last a little longer, all he really wanted were memories. Memories of happiness and contentment; was that so much to ask?
After spending so much of his life alone it shouldn't have been so hard to readjust to the familiar rhythm. Instead he found it beating down on him each day, he felt as though soon there wouldn't be anything left. Only an empty shell that hunted and stalked in the shadows.
The golden haired boy had enchanted even the president of Esthar, Laguna Loire. He saw them now, walking past him towards the gardens. Laughing and swapping jokes as though they were father and son. Their laughter reached him even as he hid behind a giant oak tree and he clenched his hands into fists and finally admitted his true problem. He was furious that all his comrades, siblings even, had deserted him.
He didn't know why they left, what was it about him that was so appalling? Rinoa, his princess (A/N He refers to her as that because he thinks she's pure, untouched and untainted by greed and corruption), had looked at him in scorn the time she had talked to him. She had shattered all his illusions in one single day, even now he remembered her mocking laughter as she caressed his scar with gentle hands.
~Flashback~
TBC…
Sorry about the cliffhanger but it's 12:47am and I need to finish the first chapter of my GW fic and I'm not quite sure what to write next…but there will be a Rinoa bastardization (not that I like her anyways).
Anyway I don't own FFVIII (no shit!) it belongs to Squaresoft (if I did own ff8 several FMVs would have been dedicated to Squall and Seifer screwing like easter bunnies…did I actually write that?).
To continue I need at least 1 review…hope you like (this will be a SeiferxSquall and it won't be a deathfic…I love happy endings ^_^ with Rinoa dying…slowly…painfully etc.)