This is a very amusing (I hope!) story about ending up in the Forgotten
Realms.
"I sat, no, I *perched*. Yes, that sounds much better! I *perched* on the edge of my chair in the crowded... no, I think I'll say cluttered instead. I *perched* on my chair in the *cluttered* English classroom.
Or should I say Language Classroom, what do you think Emma?"
"I think you should stop talking to yourself while you're writing!"
"But this is important, I have to finish this essay."
"And talking to yourself helps because...?"
"Just leave me alone," And with that, Shona began to mumble incoherently again as her pen continued to scritch-scratch across the paper. Cancel that, scritch-scratch almost makes it sound like she was being quiet! She ScRaPe-ScRaPeD across the paper to the tempo which she tapped with the fingers of her left hand on the desk - she managed this at a volume which suggested to the listener that a small militia was marching past the window.
"Sho..." No, there wasn't much point in me asking her to shut up. I sighed gloomily and stared at my own blank A4 sheet. "Summarise Your Entire School Day." was chalked shakily on the blackboard, what an uninteresting piece of writing and how were we supposed to make it sound even remotely captivating?
"Emma?" Mrs Laingk half-shrieked/half-barked at me like a starving dragon which had just spotted a person walking away from it very slowly, "Emma, have you finished?!?"
"No... not quite." I lied, something I don't even notice I'm doing when it comes to teachers, "I still have a little bit to do." and she seemed to lose interest in me as a hopeless victim of "pencil-breaking" approached her.
"How are we supposed to write an essay about our day at 10am, miss?" Someone shouted from the back of the class - but the question fell on deaf ears.
"Ffffffff...." I blew threw my teeth.
KNOCK-KNOCK
The whole class swivelled like mechanical globes in the direction of the door which had been rapped on, you could have heard a particle drop.
"Yes?" My teacher questioned suspiciously.
The door burst open.
Oh my god. It was... no, yes, no, yes, no, YES! It was Anomen? What the...
"Greetings fair lady! Prithee, do you know of a place known as "The English Staff-Room"? In the name of The Order I draw from a pool of holy light and I must cleanse that dungeon of all evils!"
"Second door down the corridor."
"Fare thee well."
I blinked, I shook my head lightly, I attempted to focus my eyes on a sign 500-metres away out of the window.
"Shona?" I stuttered.
"Emma?" Her eyes were opened wide.
"Was that...?"
"I..."
Mrs Laingk strode to the front of the class, "I am," She uttered with a great deal of authority to the class (whose reaction gave the impression that they obviously had never played BGII save for 2 occupants), "I am going to pick two volunteers from the class to find the television. It is required by my next class, you might have to ask around to see which teacher has it." Automatically a forest of hands sprouted from the barren desert of the classroom.
I gulped as my friend and I stretched our hands up at the ceiling, if that TV was in the staff room…
"Emma and Shona, go get the TV." Mrs Laingk shooed us out of the classroom and we levitated out of the room (well I'm not sure if we actually did the "floaty" thing but it certainly felt that way!)
"Better check the…"
"Dungeon first…" I turned to face the door of Anomen's Place. Rat-a-tat- tat. There was no answer, how strange.
"I'll open the door if you do." Shona whispered.
"Okay, I'll grab the side of the door and you, yeah, okay." We scrunched up our faces and pulled the door open. Nothing happened, but it was incredibly dark inside - pitch-black in fact!
"I'll step forward if you do." I murmured.
We put our feet forward, into nothingness.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
THUD!
"Damn, where are we?"
"I don't know! How am I supposed to know!" Then Shona just stopped talking.
"Shona?" There was no answer, why am I in a cage? I thought to myself.
"Ahh… the prisoner has awoken, time for… more experiments."
"Damn" I tried to think of ice-cream and of cute fluffy bunnies and of Haer'Dalis.
Dismal? Bad? Okay? Good? Amazing? Unrivalled? Just give it a review….
P.S. I'm trying to get an Icewind Dale column for the site because I've written a fic for it,
No luck though! Well, see ya in chapter 2!"
"I sat, no, I *perched*. Yes, that sounds much better! I *perched* on the edge of my chair in the crowded... no, I think I'll say cluttered instead. I *perched* on my chair in the *cluttered* English classroom.
Or should I say Language Classroom, what do you think Emma?"
"I think you should stop talking to yourself while you're writing!"
"But this is important, I have to finish this essay."
"And talking to yourself helps because...?"
"Just leave me alone," And with that, Shona began to mumble incoherently again as her pen continued to scritch-scratch across the paper. Cancel that, scritch-scratch almost makes it sound like she was being quiet! She ScRaPe-ScRaPeD across the paper to the tempo which she tapped with the fingers of her left hand on the desk - she managed this at a volume which suggested to the listener that a small militia was marching past the window.
"Sho..." No, there wasn't much point in me asking her to shut up. I sighed gloomily and stared at my own blank A4 sheet. "Summarise Your Entire School Day." was chalked shakily on the blackboard, what an uninteresting piece of writing and how were we supposed to make it sound even remotely captivating?
"Emma?" Mrs Laingk half-shrieked/half-barked at me like a starving dragon which had just spotted a person walking away from it very slowly, "Emma, have you finished?!?"
"No... not quite." I lied, something I don't even notice I'm doing when it comes to teachers, "I still have a little bit to do." and she seemed to lose interest in me as a hopeless victim of "pencil-breaking" approached her.
"How are we supposed to write an essay about our day at 10am, miss?" Someone shouted from the back of the class - but the question fell on deaf ears.
"Ffffffff...." I blew threw my teeth.
KNOCK-KNOCK
The whole class swivelled like mechanical globes in the direction of the door which had been rapped on, you could have heard a particle drop.
"Yes?" My teacher questioned suspiciously.
The door burst open.
Oh my god. It was... no, yes, no, yes, no, YES! It was Anomen? What the...
"Greetings fair lady! Prithee, do you know of a place known as "The English Staff-Room"? In the name of The Order I draw from a pool of holy light and I must cleanse that dungeon of all evils!"
"Second door down the corridor."
"Fare thee well."
I blinked, I shook my head lightly, I attempted to focus my eyes on a sign 500-metres away out of the window.
"Shona?" I stuttered.
"Emma?" Her eyes were opened wide.
"Was that...?"
"I..."
Mrs Laingk strode to the front of the class, "I am," She uttered with a great deal of authority to the class (whose reaction gave the impression that they obviously had never played BGII save for 2 occupants), "I am going to pick two volunteers from the class to find the television. It is required by my next class, you might have to ask around to see which teacher has it." Automatically a forest of hands sprouted from the barren desert of the classroom.
I gulped as my friend and I stretched our hands up at the ceiling, if that TV was in the staff room…
"Emma and Shona, go get the TV." Mrs Laingk shooed us out of the classroom and we levitated out of the room (well I'm not sure if we actually did the "floaty" thing but it certainly felt that way!)
"Better check the…"
"Dungeon first…" I turned to face the door of Anomen's Place. Rat-a-tat- tat. There was no answer, how strange.
"I'll open the door if you do." Shona whispered.
"Okay, I'll grab the side of the door and you, yeah, okay." We scrunched up our faces and pulled the door open. Nothing happened, but it was incredibly dark inside - pitch-black in fact!
"I'll step forward if you do." I murmured.
We put our feet forward, into nothingness.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
THUD!
"Damn, where are we?"
"I don't know! How am I supposed to know!" Then Shona just stopped talking.
"Shona?" There was no answer, why am I in a cage? I thought to myself.
"Ahh… the prisoner has awoken, time for… more experiments."
"Damn" I tried to think of ice-cream and of cute fluffy bunnies and of Haer'Dalis.
Dismal? Bad? Okay? Good? Amazing? Unrivalled? Just give it a review….
P.S. I'm trying to get an Icewind Dale column for the site because I've written a fic for it,
No luck though! Well, see ya in chapter 2!"