Can't fight this feeling
This second AAML fic of mine is dedicated to my good friend Sarah a.k.a Bellawaterflower. ^^ Hope you like this fic, Sarah. Check out her fics everyone, they're great. ^^
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I can't fight this feeling any longer
And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow
What started out as friendship, has grown stronger
I only wish I had the strength to let it show
I tossed and turned in my sleeping bag for at least the twelfth time tonight. We had set up camp rather early tonight and I have not been able to have a shut eye ever since I went to bed.
Irritated I opened my eyes and looked up at the dark sky, lit with hundreds of sparkling stars that greeted me every morning for the past three years. Three years, I've been following him on his Pokemon journey. Ash Ketchum - the boy that changed my life.
I tell myself that I can't hold out forever
I said there is no reason for my fear
Cause I feel so secure when we're together
You give my life direction
You make everything so clear
In him I have found a true friend and the one person that I love. From the very moment that I met Ash I knew that he was unique, but I never imagined that he would be that one special person in my life.
Slowly I turned my head to my right to look at Ash. His face was facing me. He looked so peacefully when he slept. A smile crept up onto my face. After a while I quietly slipped out of my sleeping bag, careful not to wake up Ash or Brock. So much for sleep. I walked near the edge of the hill that we were camping next to and sat myself down on the warm grass.
And even as I wander I'm keeping you in sight
You're a candle in the window
On a cold, dark winter's night
And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might
I turned back to look at the boy of my dreams. How I wish to tell him what I feel. We've been through so much together and I've been with him throughout his entire journey. I never left him, not even when the most wonderful opportunity was given to me. The Trovita Island gym leader, Rudy had wanted me to stay, but I couldn't bear to leave Ash. I have stuck by him the whole way through: through all of his losses and all of his success. I don't want to ever leave him: I want to stand beside him to see him achieve his life long goal. I will always be there for him, even if it's just as a friend and nothing more. But I don't want to be just friends, I want to be more than that. But I don't dare to risk our friendship, what if he laughed or made me leave? I rather be standing beside Ash as his friend then not stand beside him at all.
And I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I started fighting for
It's time to bring this ship into the shore
And throw away the oars, forever
I felt my tears sting my eyes and I hang my head. Why Ash? Why did you make me fall in love with you?
"Ash," I whispered to myself as I buried my face in my hands.
Just the mention of his name makes my legs go weak. I quickly whipped my tears away. I didn't want to be seen crying. I've always tried to look strong in Ash's eyes. In everyone's eyes, but if they only knew how hard it is for me to keep this secret from everyone.
Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I started fighting for
And if I have to crawl upon the floor
Come crushing through your door
Baby, I can't fight this feeling anymore
Suddenly a bright and warm light shone down on me. Quickly I looked up and saw that it was the sunset. I didn't even realize that I had been up for so long. The morning sky looked so beautiful: dashed with shades of pink and purple, like in a dream. I didn't even notice the presence of someone standing behind me, until he addressed me.
"Misty," I jumped in fright when I heard my name.
I spun around and saw that it was Ash.
"Ash! Don't creep up on me like that again. You scared me," I told him.
Ash didn't answer me, but merely smiled at me.
I felt my heart beating rapidly as he walked over to me and sat down beside me.
My life has been such a whirlwind since I saw you
I've been running round in circles in my mind
And it always seems that I'm following you
Cause you take me to the places that alone I'd never find
"What are you up so late for?" I asked, knowing that if I didn't start a conversation, an awkward silence would soon be upon us.
"I don't know. What about you? It's not like you to be up so late. Something wrong?" he asked me.
"Uh…I just couldn't…sleep that's…all," I stuttered.
"Oh," was his response.
I knew that he wasn't convinced by me answer since I was the one complaining about how tired I was just before we set up camp tonight.
And then the thing that I always hate happened. The big uncomfortable silence. I kept my eyes on my hands occasionally peeping at Ash. It was so nerve racking, sitting beside Ash, both of us not saying anything.
And even as I wander I'm keeping you in sight
You're a candle in the window on a cold, dark winter's night
And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might
'Now is the perfect time to tell him,' my head screamed at me. There is no one around except Ash and I. I couldn't give up this perfect opportunity. A chance like this might never happen again. But…what if he rejects me? I panicked, not knowing what to do as the two sides of my head fought. Ash, who was not lying on his back, seemed oblivious to the fact that I was almost trembling with nervousness. I turned and bent slightly over Ash. I took in a deep breath.
"Ash?" I whispered, hoping that he didn't suspect anything from the tone of my voice.
But thankfully being how unobservant as Ash is, he didn't notice anything or at least that's what it seemed.
"Yeah?" he replied, sitting up as I backed away slightly.
And I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I started fighting for
It's time to bring this ship into the shore
And throw away the oars, forever
Our heads were about 20 cms away from each other. I could only stare into his chocolate eyes that hypnotises me each time I look into them.
"I…I…," I couldn't speak. Hundreds of thoughts and emotions entered my mind.
"What'd you want to ask Misty?" Ash asked. I blinked and pushed myself away from him.
"Um…where are we heading tomorrow?" I finally asked.
"Well, Brock said that there's a town nearby so we'll be heading there," he smiled at me.
I felt my legs melt like jellies when he smiled at me. That smile of his captured my heart from the very start.
"I'm going to try and get some sleep. You better try and sleep as well Misty. We've got a fair bit of walking tomorrow. Goodnight Misty," Ash stood up and walked off towards his sleeping bag.
"Goodnight," I said, in such a quiet voice that I was certain that Ash didn't hear me.
And even as I wander I'm keeping you in sight
You're a candle in the window
On a cold, dark winter's night
And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might
It seemed everything had just fallen apart. I pounded my fists into the ground. The pain was horrible, but I didn't care. I did it again! I backed out. Nothing was stopping me that time. Nothing, but my own stupid fear. I hated myself: I hated myself for being such a coward.
That night I stayed in the same position, curled up on the ground, my face tear stained. I cried myself to sleep, shutting out everything.
I didn't want to think about anything. I didn't want to face Ash. I didn't know how to face him.
Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I started fighting for
And if I have to crawl upon the floor
Come crushing through your door
Baby, I can't fight this feeling anymore.
***************
This fic took me a while to write but I'm pleased with it and I hope that you all are as well. Like I said before this is for Sarah ^^. Please review everyone. Thanks heaps. I may do a 2nd chapter in the future.
This second AAML fic of mine is dedicated to my good friend Sarah a.k.a Bellawaterflower. ^^ Hope you like this fic, Sarah. Check out her fics everyone, they're great. ^^
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I can't fight this feeling any longer
And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow
What started out as friendship, has grown stronger
I only wish I had the strength to let it show
I tossed and turned in my sleeping bag for at least the twelfth time tonight. We had set up camp rather early tonight and I have not been able to have a shut eye ever since I went to bed.
Irritated I opened my eyes and looked up at the dark sky, lit with hundreds of sparkling stars that greeted me every morning for the past three years. Three years, I've been following him on his Pokemon journey. Ash Ketchum - the boy that changed my life.
I tell myself that I can't hold out forever
I said there is no reason for my fear
Cause I feel so secure when we're together
You give my life direction
You make everything so clear
In him I have found a true friend and the one person that I love. From the very moment that I met Ash I knew that he was unique, but I never imagined that he would be that one special person in my life.
Slowly I turned my head to my right to look at Ash. His face was facing me. He looked so peacefully when he slept. A smile crept up onto my face. After a while I quietly slipped out of my sleeping bag, careful not to wake up Ash or Brock. So much for sleep. I walked near the edge of the hill that we were camping next to and sat myself down on the warm grass.
And even as I wander I'm keeping you in sight
You're a candle in the window
On a cold, dark winter's night
And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might
I turned back to look at the boy of my dreams. How I wish to tell him what I feel. We've been through so much together and I've been with him throughout his entire journey. I never left him, not even when the most wonderful opportunity was given to me. The Trovita Island gym leader, Rudy had wanted me to stay, but I couldn't bear to leave Ash. I have stuck by him the whole way through: through all of his losses and all of his success. I don't want to ever leave him: I want to stand beside him to see him achieve his life long goal. I will always be there for him, even if it's just as a friend and nothing more. But I don't want to be just friends, I want to be more than that. But I don't dare to risk our friendship, what if he laughed or made me leave? I rather be standing beside Ash as his friend then not stand beside him at all.
And I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I started fighting for
It's time to bring this ship into the shore
And throw away the oars, forever
I felt my tears sting my eyes and I hang my head. Why Ash? Why did you make me fall in love with you?
"Ash," I whispered to myself as I buried my face in my hands.
Just the mention of his name makes my legs go weak. I quickly whipped my tears away. I didn't want to be seen crying. I've always tried to look strong in Ash's eyes. In everyone's eyes, but if they only knew how hard it is for me to keep this secret from everyone.
Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I started fighting for
And if I have to crawl upon the floor
Come crushing through your door
Baby, I can't fight this feeling anymore
Suddenly a bright and warm light shone down on me. Quickly I looked up and saw that it was the sunset. I didn't even realize that I had been up for so long. The morning sky looked so beautiful: dashed with shades of pink and purple, like in a dream. I didn't even notice the presence of someone standing behind me, until he addressed me.
"Misty," I jumped in fright when I heard my name.
I spun around and saw that it was Ash.
"Ash! Don't creep up on me like that again. You scared me," I told him.
Ash didn't answer me, but merely smiled at me.
I felt my heart beating rapidly as he walked over to me and sat down beside me.
My life has been such a whirlwind since I saw you
I've been running round in circles in my mind
And it always seems that I'm following you
Cause you take me to the places that alone I'd never find
"What are you up so late for?" I asked, knowing that if I didn't start a conversation, an awkward silence would soon be upon us.
"I don't know. What about you? It's not like you to be up so late. Something wrong?" he asked me.
"Uh…I just couldn't…sleep that's…all," I stuttered.
"Oh," was his response.
I knew that he wasn't convinced by me answer since I was the one complaining about how tired I was just before we set up camp tonight.
And then the thing that I always hate happened. The big uncomfortable silence. I kept my eyes on my hands occasionally peeping at Ash. It was so nerve racking, sitting beside Ash, both of us not saying anything.
And even as I wander I'm keeping you in sight
You're a candle in the window on a cold, dark winter's night
And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might
'Now is the perfect time to tell him,' my head screamed at me. There is no one around except Ash and I. I couldn't give up this perfect opportunity. A chance like this might never happen again. But…what if he rejects me? I panicked, not knowing what to do as the two sides of my head fought. Ash, who was not lying on his back, seemed oblivious to the fact that I was almost trembling with nervousness. I turned and bent slightly over Ash. I took in a deep breath.
"Ash?" I whispered, hoping that he didn't suspect anything from the tone of my voice.
But thankfully being how unobservant as Ash is, he didn't notice anything or at least that's what it seemed.
"Yeah?" he replied, sitting up as I backed away slightly.
And I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I started fighting for
It's time to bring this ship into the shore
And throw away the oars, forever
Our heads were about 20 cms away from each other. I could only stare into his chocolate eyes that hypnotises me each time I look into them.
"I…I…," I couldn't speak. Hundreds of thoughts and emotions entered my mind.
"What'd you want to ask Misty?" Ash asked. I blinked and pushed myself away from him.
"Um…where are we heading tomorrow?" I finally asked.
"Well, Brock said that there's a town nearby so we'll be heading there," he smiled at me.
I felt my legs melt like jellies when he smiled at me. That smile of his captured my heart from the very start.
"I'm going to try and get some sleep. You better try and sleep as well Misty. We've got a fair bit of walking tomorrow. Goodnight Misty," Ash stood up and walked off towards his sleeping bag.
"Goodnight," I said, in such a quiet voice that I was certain that Ash didn't hear me.
And even as I wander I'm keeping you in sight
You're a candle in the window
On a cold, dark winter's night
And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might
It seemed everything had just fallen apart. I pounded my fists into the ground. The pain was horrible, but I didn't care. I did it again! I backed out. Nothing was stopping me that time. Nothing, but my own stupid fear. I hated myself: I hated myself for being such a coward.
That night I stayed in the same position, curled up on the ground, my face tear stained. I cried myself to sleep, shutting out everything.
I didn't want to think about anything. I didn't want to face Ash. I didn't know how to face him.
Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I started fighting for
And if I have to crawl upon the floor
Come crushing through your door
Baby, I can't fight this feeling anymore.
***************
This fic took me a while to write but I'm pleased with it and I hope that you all are as well. Like I said before this is for Sarah ^^. Please review everyone. Thanks heaps. I may do a 2nd chapter in the future.