"TOW The Past Isn't At Rest" – Chapter Fourteen
"Really and Truly"
AN: THE REVISION: I revised the timeline slightly, because I decided it wasn't quite realistic. I was trying to stretch it out so Emma would be a little older at the end, but I don't think that's going to work. I'll just have to revamp the ending I had planned. So, for those of you that have already read and are wondering what the revision is, it comes about halfway through – changed from "Four months" later" to "Six weeks later". That seems more realistic. Oh, and the action is not necessarily continuous. So, when Monica and Chandler ran into Will, a couple of weeks passed before Chandler "didn't knock", etc. So if you go to the trouble to try to figure out the timing (which is probably useless…) just put the extra weeks into spaces in the story, okay? It doesn't really matter, except for those that might not believe Emma's talking. But if Emma is advanced for her age, she's just advanced for her age! Can't help it. She's not talking a lot! I should have made her older at the beginning and then I wouldn't have these problems!!! Oh, and thanks for Rose for confirming my thoughts on this and making me decide to change it.
Chandler ran up the stairs, hoping he wasn't too late. He had hurried home to change before dinner, knowing that that his khakis and casual pullover sweater wouldn't be good enough for any place Rachel would pick – especially not for such a "big" event as all six friends going out together had become. At times, he really hated living outside the city. It was so much easier when he lived within forty seconds of all of his friends – not to mention his daughter.
He didn't bother poking his head into Joey and Rachel's apartment, knowing they wouldn't leave without them. Instead, he glanced at his watch as he walked into Monica's apartment, relieved that the minute hand was just slightly past the 12. Close enough.
"Monica?"
"Coming!"
Before he could even take a seat on the couch to wait patiently, Monica walked out of her bedroom, still fastening an earring on her left ear.
"Sorry I'm running late – Mom and Dad just picked up Emma a few minutes ago."
"You're not late. Or if you are, we're late together. So do you know where Rachel's taking us?"
"No, the other four are still battling it out. Joey wants Italian as usual, Rach wants to try that new Japanese place down the street, Ross wants steak, and Phoebe's asking for a strictly vegetarian place just to get him riled up."
Chandler rolled his eyes. "This should be a fun night. Got your keys?"
Monica nodded, checking her purse to be sure and thinking sentimentally that Chandler used to carry the keys when they went out. Brushing the thought aside, she looked up at him and smiled as she walked past him and out the door. She waited for him to pull the door closed behind him and join her before going into Joey and Rachel's apartment.
"Hey guys! We're here."
"Ah, the star-crossed lovers have arrived," Ross remarked dryly, only to be jabbed in the ribs by Rachel's elbow. He yelped and glared at her.
"What? They are! Geez, they're a modern-day Romeo and Juliet."
"Yeah," Joey commented, unconcerned. "But I don't think Chandler and Monica are going to kill themselves."
They all looked at Joey, surprised by his knowledge of Shakespeare. He glanced up - noticing the looks - and frowned.
"That's the movie with Leonardo DiCaprio where they talk really weird and blow up the gas station, right?"
Chandler just shook his head, thinking that it was more ironic that Joey had actually watched a film version of Romeo and Juliet than it was that a blown-up gas station was what he remembered.
"Yes, in addition to being one of the greatest love stories ever told," Ross said sarcastically.
"But they shot themselves!"
Ross rolled his eyes, prepared to start arguing. Before he could open his mouth, Chandler interrupted.
"So where are we going to eat?"
The four different answers came so fast and so loud that Chandler didn't understand any of them. As his friends faced off and started to argue again, he glanced at Monica and tilted his head toward the hallway. She nodded in agreement, looking relieved.
"Hey, guys, when you decide, we'll be outside waiting."
That got no response and Chandler had a feeling that when they finally did decide, they would be starting a frantic search for Chandler and Monica. Instead of trying again, he just led Monica out into the hallway and closed the door behind him. Monica walked over to lean against the door to her apartment and gave him a brief, almost pained, smile. Chandler sat down on the step between the apartments and the stairs, and watched her for a moment before speaking.
"You okay?"
Monica shrugged slightly before nodding, and went to sit beside him, arranging her dress over her knees and stretching out her legs.
"Yeah, I'm okay. But doesn't it bother you?"
"That we're the number one topic of gossip?"
"Yeah. I wish one of them would do something stupid so we could all talk about something new."
"You don't think Joey wearing silly putty to get a part in a movie was stupid?"
Monica managed a smile. "But they're not comparing him to Hamlet, are they?"
"Well…at least they're doing it to our face now instead of behind our backs. I can only imagine how many hours they spent talking about us at first."
"Ugh…I would rather have them do it behind our backs. Then at least I don't have to stand there thinking about how I ruined everything while they're treating us like we're there for their entertainment."
Chandler leaned over and pressed a kiss against the side of her head.
"You didn't ruin everything. We're here – together – aren't we?"
Monica looked at him, then leaned her head against his shoulder with a sigh.
"Yeah, we are. You know, I'm actually starting to remember what we were like before London. I'd almost forgotten…how good you were at comforting me – without sex, I mean – and how you could always tell with a look whether I needed coffee or alcohol… You were my best friend. You are my best friend."
Chandler slowly lifted his arms to encircle her, his mind going back to the now-familiar refrain that he had been trying to push aside all day.
Dude, you didn't knock.
Was it just a coincidence that Monica was saying this now, when he had just discovered the same thing that afternoon? Was it some kind of sign?
"You're my best friend, too, Monica. Always." He sighed and pulled away so he could look into her face. "You know what I realized this afternoon?"
"That we're a 21st century Shakespearean tragedy?" Monica responded sarcastically, her words still bitter. No doubt she would have words for Ross later.
"Mon, you've really been spending too much time with me. You weren't this sarcastic even when we were living together." Monica looked like she was going to protest, but Chandler cut her off. "But no, I'm serious." He paused as Monica gave him her full attention, his tone telling her that this was important. "Since Emma was born, I haven't come over without knocking on your door first. At first…well, needless to say, when you were still engaged we weren't exactly friends. And then…Well, the thing is, as long as I was knocking, I felt like we were still getting over the past, trying to find common ground before we could even begin thinking about the future. But… today, I didn't knock. And it didn't bother you that I didn't knock. And…I realized that we're getting it back, Monica - everything we lost. Slowly, yes. But we're getting it back."
Monica wiped away a stray tear and leaned into his arms, sighing when he hugged her back tightly.
"It's only going to get better from here, Mon. I promise."
Monica nodded her head against his chest, wishing she didn't have to move for the rest of her life. But just as she was thinking that, Rachel came out into the hallway, interrupting the moment.
"Mexican okay with you guys?"
Chandler released Monica and stood up, holding out a hand to pull Monica up beside him.
"Who wanted Mexican?"
"Nobody." Rachel didn't elaborate further.
"Okay…well, yeah that's fine."
"Great," Rachel sighed with relief, then yelled over her shoulder for the rest of them to "Come on!" as she walked toward the stairs. Joey, Ross, and Phoebe walked out into the hallway, already engrossed in another conversation.
"But, Ross, why did they bury her if she wasn't dead? And how did Romeo get into a tomb, anyway? Is he like, Superman?"
"Yeah, and tell me again why the Post Office guy didn't just put the letter in his mailbox?"
(AN: If you've never seen the Bazz Luhrmann version – "Romeo + Juliet" – that came out in…1996? you won't understand all of that…sorry. But it's not like it's essential to the plot. I was just rereading the paper I wrote on this movie for my "Shakespeare On Film" class last spring, and the movie was just fresh in my mind.)
Six weeks later…(Emma is now about 9 ½ - 10 months old, by my rough calculations, and it's like October, just in case anybody's wondering. Even I'm losing track…)
Chandler strode into Monica's apartment, still wearing his work suit.
"Hey Mon, hey Emma!"
"Da!" Emma called, her face breaking into a happy grin as she toddled toward her father.
"Hey, beautiful!" Chandler greeted her as he scooped her up and covered her with kisses. Emma just giggled happily in response. Chandler walked over and sat down next to Monica on the couch, leaning over to kiss her on the forehead. "Hey, beautiful."
"Hey yourself. How was your day?"
"Eh," Chandler answered with a shrug. "Yours?"
"It was okay. Emma said "hi" to Ross."
"Really?" Chandler lifted up his daughter and gave her a big smile. "Did you say "hi", Em? Tell Daddy hi!"
Emma frowned at him, then squirmed to get down. Chandler stood her up on the rug beside the couch, and Emma plopped down on the floor, immediately reaching for his shoelaces.
"Yeah, she'll say hi to Ross but not to her own father?"
"Hey, her first word was "Da". Isn't that good enough for you?"
Chandler couldn't help smiling as he remembered the first time Emma had said it. He had almost cried. She was starting to add a few words to her vocabulary, which consisted of "Da", "Mama", "No", "Ba", which Chandler and Monica thought stood for her teddy bear, and now "Hi".
"Yeah, but you got her first multiple syllable word. I think she made a pretty good compromise between us."
"Yeah, I guess she did."
They were both silent for a moment, watching Emma as she happily untied Emma's shoes. Chandler finally took a deep breath and turned to Monica.
"Mon, can I ask you something?"
"Of course you can. Everything okay?"
"Yes. Everything's fine…I think. I…well, see what I wanted to know is…um, do you think we could find someone to watch Emma tomorrow night?"
That wasn't what he wanted to say. But maybe it would help lead up to the question he really wanted to ask.
"Yeah…probably." Monica was giving him a strange look. Somehow, this was strangely reminiscent of the night he'd tried to propose. "Why?"
"Umm…Monica, I wanted to ask you…Well, I was just wondering…Uh…Would you like to go out to dinner…or something…tomorrow night?"
Monica was still looking at him with raised eyebrows, obviously trying to read him.
"Yeah…dinner sounds nice." She paused and looked at him searchingly. "Are you sure you're okay?"
She answered too casually. She didn't realize what he was asking.
"Yes, Monica. I'm fine. I…I'm just nervous."
"Why are you nervous? It's just me."
"I know it's you, and that's an awfully good reason to be nervous, Mon. I never really…asked you out before. We never had a "first date" the first time around."
Her eyes widened as she took in the words, then just as quickly, she started to cry.
"What? Why are you crying? Is it too soon? I'm sorry, Monica. I just thought…"
"No." Monica stopped him with a finger on his lips. "No, it's fine. I would…I would love to go out to dinner with you."
"Really?"
"Really. Did you
think I'd say no?"
Chandler shrugged, not even
trying to hide his relief.
"I hoped you wouldn't."
"Oh, sweetie." Monica reached over and brushed her hand across his cheek, ignoring the tears that still rested on hers. "How could I say no?"
"No!" Emma yelled cheerfully, pulling herself up by Chandler's pants leg and attempting to climb into his lap. Chandler lifted her obediently, grinning as Emma put her hands on both sides of his face and squeezed, scrunching his features together. Chandler laughed and tried to kiss her with his puckered mouth, but Emma leaned away from him, screaming with laughter. She finally let go of his face and crawled over his lap to Monica, looking back at Chandler as if she expected him to come after her.
"So who are we going to inflict her on tomorrow night?"
"It's Ross's turn I think. I'm sure he'll be happy to baby-sit." Monica paused and thought about it. "Do you think we should ask him to keep her all night?"
"Miss Geller, I'm shocked!" Chandler teased her, making Monica blush at the implication.
"Chandler…I meant so that we don't wake her up to bring her home. You know how cranky she gets when she wakes up before she's ready. She'll be miserable for two days."
"Why can't Ross just stay here with her?"
Monica flushed and looked down at Emma.
"Well…I thought - if you were to want to kiss me goodnight - I wouldn't want anyone – especially my brother – around to ruin it."
Chandler studied her face, smiling at her embarrassment.
"Well…do whatever you want to do. Because I can guarantee you that I'm going to want to kiss you goodnight."
Chandler followed Monica up the stairs, both laughing animatedly as Monica told a story about Emma's latest antics. They stopped outside of Monica's door, and Chandler fished her keys out of his pocket so she could unlock the door. She did so, then turned to him before she opened it.
"Are you coming in?"
"Is that an invitation?"
Monica just raised her eyebrows and gave him a slight shrug.
Chandler smiled at her and nodded. "Okay."
He followed her inside, noting how quiet and empty it seemed without Emma there. Noticing the light blinking on the answering machine, Monica hit the play button as she kicked off her shoes and carried them into her bedroom.
"Hey, guys, it's Ross. Just letting you know that Emma's fine. It's about 8:00, and she's sound asleep…no problems at all. She loves her Uncle Ross! Anyway, enjoy your date. See you tomorrow." BEEP! "Chandler, don't forget - she's still my sister." BEEP!
Monica rolled her eyes as she came back out of her bedroom.
"I think I have THE most overprotective brother on the planet."
"I agree." Chandler loosened his tie and draped his jacket over a chair in the kitchen. "You can change if you want. I don't expect you to stay dressed up."
Monica glanced at him skeptically, but he just nodded toward the bedroom.
"Go ahead. I really don't mind."
"Thanks. I think I will."
Chandler sat down on the couch, waiting for her to come back. In a couple of minutes, she was back, wearing a pair of flannel pants and a fleecy sweatshirt. She still looked great.
"You want coffee or anything?"
"No, I'm fine. Just come sit down." He draped one arm around the back of the couch, inviting her to sit next to him and cuddle up. Monica sighed happily as his arms went around her, hoping he would keep them there.
"I had fun tonight," Chandler whispered against her ear, sending shivers down her spine.
"Me too. You're a great date."
"Me? Didn't you see all the guys shooting me dirty looks because I was with the most beautiful woman in the room?"
"You were hallucinating."
"No…you were definitely the most beautiful woman in New York tonight. Any night."
"You really think so?"
"Of course I do. I'm the luckiest man in the world." He paused and looked across the room at the stereo. "You know what? I've got a great idea."
He stood up and went over to rifle through the cd's Monica had, knowing most of his were probably still there. He found the one he wanted and popped it into the stereo.
"What are you doing?"
Chandler didn't answer her question. He simply held his hand out to her and smiled gently. "Come here."
Monica walked over to him, looking apprehensive. Chandler hit the play button, then took her hand and pulled her into his arms as the song started to play.
"I promise Janice won't ruin it this time," he whispered to her before he started to sing along with the lyrics.
Someday, when I'm awfully low
When the world is cold
I will feel a glow just thinking of you
And the way you look tonight.
Oh, but you're lovely
With your smile so warm
And your cheek so soft
There is nothing for me but to love you.
Just the way you look tonight.
"I love this song," Monica whispered, lifting her head from his shoulder so she could look at him. "And your voice is just a little bit better than Janice's."
"I'm not sure that's a compliment."
"You can take it however you want."
Chandler rested his forehead against hers, and sighed deeply.
"You know…if this wasn't our first date…I'd tell you that I love you."
Monica smiled softly. "And if it wasn't our first date and you told me that…I'd tell you that I love you too."
"Good to know."
Monica just nodded, too overcome to speak, and put her head back on his shoulder, hugging him tightly. When the song ended, they both pulled away without wanting to, eyes locked on each other. After a long moment, Chandler took a deep breath and a step backwards.
"Well…it's getting late. I think it's probably best if I go."
Monica just nodded and followed him to the door. He put his jacket back on and checked to make sure his care keys were in the pocket. Then he turned to Monica, pulling her close.
"Thank you for tonight. I'll stop by tomorrow after work, okay?"
"Okay."
Chandler hesitated a split second, then lowered his head to kiss her. Monica responded immediately, winding her arms around his neck and holding him as close as he was holding her. It was the first time they had kissed since the day they decided to be friends, but this kiss more than made up for the months of denying themselves. They finally ended it with several soft pecks, and Chandler smiled as he placed a final gentle kiss on her forehead.
"I want to kiss you good night every night for the rest of my life."
Without giving Monica a chance to respond, he gave her one last smile and closed the door behind him. He couldn't keep from whistling as he walked down the stairs and out to his car.
To Be Continued…
"Really and Truly"
Paul Brandt
If a fallin' heart could make
a sound
Then you would hear mine for miles around
If what I feel became a light
Then there would be no darkness in this night
They say you know when it's real
Baby I can tell you it's true
'Cause really and truly
I think we should be
Together like this for as long as we both are
Livin', breathin'
I'll be everything you need and more
I'll be really and truly yours
If love's a gift to give away
For you, I swear, it'd be Christmas every day
If love could keep you free from harm
The safest place for you is in my arms
And if I reveal too much too soon
Well, I'm just bein' honest with you
Really and truly
I think we should be
Together like this for as long as we both are
Livin', breathin'
I'll be everything you need and more
I'll be really and truly yours, oh
Have me, hold me
In that sweet moment
It'll be for sure
I'll be really and truly yours