Shades Of Gray

By princessofplanets

E-mail: princessofplanets@hotmail.com

Part 3 / 9

Alexandra frowned at her food, picking through it without interest. The mail had already come – nothing for her, as usual – and it was too early to leave. She mashed the eggs, tore up the toast, and crushed her bacon into tiny pieces. Not yet satisfied, she politely requested the oatmeal. When she received it she carefully added a large spoonful of the colorless cereal to her creation. After a moment's consideration, she poured orange juice over it and determinedly began stirring it around with her spoon.

Her three friends were looking at her with great concern. "Alex…?" Harry managed to ask after a long silence from the Gryffindor table.

"Mm?" she inquired, her blue eyes still focused on her invention.

"Are you… ok?" The blonde blinked at him for a moment in surprise before grinning.

"Course I'm fine!" she said. "I'm just not hungry, so I'm turning breakfast into a science experiment… or maybe it's a Potions experiment, since we don't have Science!" She flashed another grin before saying, "It's seeing which tastes better – the actual food, or this mush, which is really what it turns into once the stuff enters our stomach… Are you guys ok?"

Harry looked pale, while Ron looked almost green. Even Hermione looked slightly queasy, though she managed to answer, "I… don't think we really needed to know that, Alex."

"'K, 'Mione-chan," the blonde chirped cheerfully.

The trio stared at the girl, who was happily stirring around the grotesque creation in front of her. "You sure are lively today, aren't you Alex?" Seamus inquired, silently wondering about the fifteen-year-old's personality change.

"Hai!" came the agreement. Dean, a tall black boy, looked at her strangely before shaking his head and attempting to go back to his breakfast – though that was exceedingly difficult after seeing what the blonde had made of hers.

Brightly colored lights followed by an explosion of sound silenced the Great Hall. Alexandra looked up, worry seeping slowly into her forced cheerful face. "Excuse me for interrupting your breakfast," Dumbledore started, "but I wanted to give you all this announcement today. On Halloween there will be a dance accompanying the celebration. Parents are invited, and the students from Beauxbatons and Durmstrang will be there also, as well as the elves, centaurs, and even a few unicorns will be coming."

Fear seeped into Alexandra's bones as the Headmaster spoke, and she shivered involuntarily. Some were silent, remembering the previous year, while most cheered the news. "Ms. Star, could you please come up? Everyone else, enjoy the rest of your breakfast and don't be late to your classes, please."

Alex stood and walked to the head table slowly, feeling everyone's eyes on her. "Hai, Professor?" she asked quietly when she stood in front of Dumbledore.

"Does that sound like enough magic to you, Alexandra?"

"Yes, Professor, it does seem… tempting enough… But I think the thing we should really emphasize is that it's a parent/student thing. He loves showing he has power over me."

Dumbledore studied her carefully. "I will consider it," he said finally. "Now, Ms. Star, you had better get your books for class."

"Hai…" she murmured slightly. She turned and left the hall, only to be grabbed by the elbow and dragged into a closet. "What the h*ll…!"

"What's wrong with you?!" Draco demanded angrily, shoving the girl up against the wall. He pinned her there firmly, careful, yet unwilling to let her go.

"What d'you mean?" she wondered aloud, relaxing her body in hopes he would relax his hold on her.

"First you were CHEERFUL at breakfast…"

"Isn't a girl allowed to be happy?" she exclaimed defensively.

"No," the blonde boy replied. "Alex, whenever your 'cheerful' your really worried. And then you looked downright TERRIFIED when Dumbledore made his announcement! What the f*ck is up?"

Alex made a face at his language, never having tolerated swearing well. "I just had a bad night, ok? Now come on, I have a promise to fulfill, don't I? I promised that I'd help you and Harry get together this year and I will. But we have to start now." She was silent, adding in her thoughts, Because if things go the way I think they will I'll be dead in two months.

Draco examined his friend's face carefully, frowning at the precise expressionless mask. "Fine, I'll let you out this time, Star. Look, you have DADA, and I have Herbology. Think about our plan, and then we'll put it into action. Good idea?"

"Yeah, sure," she agreed weakly. The blonde slipped carefully out of the closet and raced up to Gryffindor Tower. She dug through her trunk madly for her DADA books before grabbing them and racing back down.

When she reached the Defense Against the Dark Arts room she was late and gasping for breath. "Gomen nasai, Professor Karr," she breathed out quickly before sitting in the first open seat she saw, one in the front row next to Neville.

"Apology accepted, Ms. Star. But I am curious – what took you so long?" Alexandra blushed, realizing how bad the truth sounded.

"Ano…" Um… "Well, in all truthfulness, sir, a friend of mine was worried about me and he… detained me." Malachi raised an eyebrow at her for a moment before turning his attention back to the class.

"Ok, class, put away your books, the first day is going to be explaining why I'm here." Some of the class groaned at the prospect of a lecture, while others cheered that they wouldn't be using the large textbooks. "Ok. Guys, we're at war now. Maybe it doesn't seem like it… but the terror has already begun for those unlucky enough to have to experience it. People are being slaughtered EVERY DAY… on both sides.

"Yeah, sure, Voldemort's bad. But we're no angels either. And who knows? Maybe he even did some good in his life…" The vampire was looking pointedly at Alex, who sat ridged in her seat. Harry raised his hand from the back row.

"Professor, are we talking about the same Voldemort?" Scattered laughs sounded from the room, even though the raven-haired teenager was deadly serious.

"I know of only one Voldemort – He-who-must-not-be-named – who are you speaking of?"

"So you're saying that you think he's *GOOD*?!?!"

"Harry, if you take the time to look humans are quite predictable. Throughout history they've been repeating the same boring problems again and again. And yet, at the same time, they can be extremely UNpredictable."

Hermione raised her hand. Malachi nodded at her and she stated, "Professor, that's impossible. A person cannot be unpredictable and unpredictable at the same time!"

"Humans manage it. Don't know how they do, but they do," the teacher stated frankly. "Look, however young I may seem, I'm actually a very old man. I've learned a lot through the years. NEVER have I met one creature that was pure evil, because none of them had always been that way. Even small, faint memories of a distant past keep a creature from completely falling into hate.

"Humans amaze me, sometimes. Some of your greatest fears – vampires, mummies, zombies… they were all human once. They know all of a human's weaknesses… but also all of his or her strengths.

"You see, things aren't always as black-and-white as they seem. And that's my job this year. Not to teach you dumb spells that may leave you in the time of greatest need, not even to teach you things even a muggle could do to save themselves from danger. My job is to teach you about all the shades of gray… and how complicated the true situation can be, even if from one point of view it was simple." Malachi's soft, hypnotizing voice was cut off by a bell signifying the end of class. His black eyes glanced up at the clock, even as he said, "You're free to go."

Students filed out quickly, talking loudly amongst themselves. Harry, Ron, and Hermione stopped at her desk while Alex patiently gathered her books. "You guys go on, ok? I have to talk to Professor Karr. I'll meet you at Potions?"

"Sure…" Harry said. As he left he started talking to Ron, and it was only Hermione who glanced back worriedly. The blonde smiled reassuringly before turning her attention to the vampire.

"It was a nice lecture."

"Thanks."

"May I ask you another personal question?" she inquired softly. Malachi glanced up from the paperwork he had been about to do. At his encouraging nod, Alex continued, "How are they feeding you?" She gasped almost as soon as the words left her mouth, flushing with embarrassment. "I'm sorry! That makes you sound so much like a pet… That wasn't my intention!"

"It's ok, Alex. They're giving me cattle blood."

"Mm, no wonder then," she murmured to herself.

"What?"

"It's just… you look so pale… Almost like you haven't fed in several days. Maybe even longer," the blonde explained. She glanced up for a moment, examining him critically. "I'm going to need study help," she said suddenly. "Do you think you would be able to help me with my work?"

"You think you'd pay me by opening a vein?" Malachi asked skeptically. "Alex, feeding a vampire voluntarily takes a lot of trust. And even if you had that trust of me I wouldn't let you do it."

"I've got to go," Alex murmured softly. "Think about it, ok? The offer stays open – and you know you'll die if you're kept on animal blood, and before that you'll lose control and hurt someone. Maybe even kill them. Think about it." The girl slung her bag over her shoulder and left the room, heading quickly to Potions. She walked into the dungeon room calmly and sat beside Hermione.

Professor Snape stormed in when class started, clearly in a bad mood. He proceeded to pair people: Harry/Draco, Ron/Crabbe, Hermione/Alexandra, and so on. When he reached the end of the pairings she felt anger seethe inside her. Damn it, Snape, how could you do this?!

The teacher grinned at the one lone student. Neville Longbottom. "You, Mr. Longbottom, will be working – "

"He can work with us, Professor!" Hermione quickly inserted. Alex nodded her agreement quickly.

"Longbottom will be working ALONE, Ms. Granger! And for daring to interrupt me, ten points from Gryffindor!"

Alex couldn't contain her anger, and snapped out, "Maybe I should take this up with my father, *PROFESSOR!* I'm sure he would *LOVE* to see his… friend… after all these years. My father's known for the extravagant, imagine the welcome *you* would receive."

Snape froze in cold fury. "You just cost your house fifty points, Ms. Star. I'd think twice before trying something like that again." The teacher's voice was dangerously soft, and his frozen glare chilled the blonde to the bone.

Alex clenched her fists in anger, only to grab the knife and start mechanically cutting the herbs for the potion, barely hearing through her rage, "Mr. Longbottom, at the end of the class period we will test your 'Draught of the Dead' on… yourself. If you mess up, even in the slightest, it could put you in a coma… Or worse, it could even *kill* you." The Potion master's grin was downright evil.

"Herm?" she inquired softly, careful to watch Neville and cut the herbs precisely. The brown-haired girl beside her nodded slightly to show she was listening. "I'm going to help Neville using my magic, 'k?"

Worry filled Hermione's brown eyes. "O… okay, I guess… It would save Neville…"

Alex nodded. She watched the boy in front of her like a hawk watches a mouse, carefully pulling on her strings of magic to keep him from ruining his concoction.

The end of the class period drew nearer, and five minutes from the dismissing bell Snape called the class to a halt. "Here in my hand I hold the counter-potion to the Draught of the Dead," he announced to the class. "So, if Longbottom here did it RIGHT – which would be a miracle – this will promptly wake him up."

Neville was shaking in his robes as he carefully poured some of his potion into a glass. Teeth chattering, he swallowed the glass in one large gulp and immediately fell asleep. The Gryffindors gasped, while the Slytherins laughed. Professor Snape pried open Neville's jaw and poured down the counter-potion. A moment later, Neville leapt up, grinning with joy. Cheers erupted from the Gryffindors as the bell rang and everyone filed out of the classroom. Just as he was about to leave, Draco glanced back at Alex to see her small, satisfied smile. He also noticed her exhaustion from working her magic.

"I can't believe you did that," he mouthed to her as he exited the room.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was the night after Neville's 'miracle', which the Gryffindors were still congratulating him for, and a certain blonde Slytherin was searching for Alexandra Star. Draco's head popped out of the small trapdoor on the roof. "I thought you'd be out here!" he called to the girl, moving onto the slanted ground with cat-like grace. He studied his friend's serious features, watching her stare at the blood-red sunset.

"Draco?" she asked softly, finally acknowledging his presence as the stars started appearing in the sky. "You… You know how they say when people die, it's like their moving into the light?"

"Yeah…" the blonde-haired boy answered doubtfully.

"Well I'm in darkness, Draco," she murmured softly. "But I can see the light at the end of the tunnel." She turned to her friend, revealing her tear-filled eyes. "I… I don't want to die, Draco, demo…" But… Tears again started falling down her already tear-stained face as she threw herself into her friend's arms. "But… If I don't…" Sobs broke her speech, and Draco tighten his arms around her in confusion. He had never seen his friend cry – not when she told him Voldemort was her 'father', not when she said she wasn't human, not when Cedric died – and now something had gotten the idea in her head that *SHE* would die, and he had no idea how to comfort her.

Come to think of it, I've never comforted anyone, ever, the teenager thought. He opened his mouth, but managed to bite back the rude retort about her being weak. "Alex… Dumbledore would never let us get hurt. And even if you *WERE* in a potentially harmful situation, you know I'd never let anything happen to you. You're like a little sister, and if there's one thing I never do it's that I never, *EVER* allow my family – well, those I consider my family – " he revised quickly, thinking of his father, "get hurt."

Alex was silent, reveling in the serenity of the night. "You're right," she murmured finally. The moon had risen high into the sky, and she found herself saying, "Well aren't I a baka!" Idiot! "Here I am ranting about my problems when you and Harry STILL aren't together!" She grinned. "How about this. You have to be EXTRA, *EXTRA* nice to him, starting bright and early tomorrow, ok? And you could be his secret admirer…" She trailed off. "Yes, I think that will do it! Then you should have him in a month or so, don't you think?"

Draco grinned slightly, only half listening to what his blonde friend was rambling about. What IS it that she's so worried about? he wondered.

TO BE CONTINUED…

I'd really appreciate it if you reviewed… Thank you, nevertheless, for putting up with me! ^_^.