Chapter 13- Heartache
Celes didn't know quite how to react. She couldn't deny it though...she knew, in her heart, what she had wanted him to really say. And...he did not say it. Instead, he had said the worst possible thing to say, in her opinion...Celes couldn't stop herself from letting out the low moan of agony and pain that escaped her lips...
"Celes?" Locke cried, and suddenly released her. "Oh, I forgot about your back. Did I hurt you?"
Celes couldn't speak, so she merely nodded.
"I'm sorry." Locke said quickly, and smiled some. "Man, I'm just so glad to see you like this again...." Celes still couldn't reply, her heart still numb from the shock. She decided that this hurt ten times more then her last battle...
"Best friends, huh...." She murmured.
Locke smiled even wider at her saying it. He suddenly reached up and un- tied his bandana from his hair.
"Wh-what are you doing?" Celes questioned dully.
Locke took the bandana and handed it over to Celes.
"I want you to have this." Locke said. "Sort of as symbolism, of this day. Do you understand what I mean?"
"Yeah..." Celes replied, and felt the soft fabric between her fingers. Strangely enough though, she found that well...she didn't care...
"Thanks." Celes replied simply, her fingers now clutching it tightly.
"Now, lets get out of here." Locke said, and stood up. Celes just sat there dumbly for a moment, before standing up herself and slipping her hood back on with shaky fingers.
He'll....never see me as a lover now....or as anything closer then friends. Celes thought as they left South Figaro. Is this how I am doomed to be with him forever? Has fate shut the door in my face concerning my future with Locke? This can't be all! But....it....is....this is all it is.
**********
That evening, Celes told the Chancellor she could not make it to dinner with Edgar, Sabin, Terra, and Locke. She lied and said that the idea of food was not too appealing at the moment.
Edgar had arranged it so that Terra and Celes had their own rooms now, and Celes was sitting in hers, gazing out the glass doors that led to her balcony. It had long stopped raining, but evening was falling fast, and the sky was getting dark. Celes moaned again and slumped over on her bed. Despite this whole fiasco, she had still not shed one tear. Trying not to cry was exhausting enough, and Celes slipped into a deep sleep almost immediately.
"Celes...?"
Celes turned around and saw that Locke was in the doorway of her dressing room. When he saw her, his jaw dropped, and his face turned a deep crimson.
"Aye aye aye! Izzat....you!?"
Celes smirked and put her hands on her hips, her formal gown swishing a bit over the floor. Locke blinked and tried to pull himself together.
"Gah....um....uh..."
Celes suddenly dropped her smirk and looked over Locke carefully.
"Locke?"
"Uh-huh?"
Celes took a step forward towards him.
"Why did you save me back there?"
"What!?" Locke cried. "Come on, I told you already. It's cause I wanted to!"
"Really?" Celes questioned, and took another step closer. "Locke...I think.....somewhere inside, you were really saving Rachel, wern't you? Is that.....it?"
Locke couldn't bear to look at her any longer. He turned around and lowered his eyes.
"That....ribbon suits you."
Celes blinked and ran her fingers over the violet ribbon weaved in her hair.
"Maybe you had better run through that script one last time..." Locke said.
Celes turned to scan through her scriptbook, but when she turned the pages, she saw that they were all empty!
"What!?" Celes cried. "What kind of joke is this?! She frantically tried to find her part, but found nothing but all white. Suddenly, the book got warmer and warmer, until it burst into flame, without any warning to Celes! Celes screamed and pulled her hands back, seeing that her hands were badly burnt by the flame. She turned around, and saw that Locke was gone too!
"Noooooo!" Celes cried, her hands seething with pain. "Somebody help me!"
"Celes! Wake up!"
"Huh?"
"Wake up! You were having a nightmare!"
Celes opened her eyes slowly and saw that she was still in her bedroom at the palace. Sunlight was pouring through the glass doors and windows, washing over her. She looked at her bedside, and saw Terra. Terra was gazing down at her, with worry in her eyes.
"Celes, you were having a bad dream?" She asked.
"Yeah..." Celes nodded, and yawned. "What an awful night..."
"Did something happen with Locke?" Terra questioned immediately. "Is that why you did not join us at dinner last night?"
"Well, not exactly." Celes replied nervousy.
"Oh.....please share it with me..." Terra said softly, and sat down beside Celes. "Maybe I can help?"
Celes sighed, and decided not to keep it in any longer.
After a long, long time's worth of explaining, Terra nodded in understanding, and Celes collapsed back on her pillows.
"Do you know what I am going through?" Celes asked. "I cannot tell if this is normal or not..."
"This is quite normal." Terra offered. She sighed. "And the advice I am going to give you....you may not want to do it..."
"What is it?!" Celes cried.
"You simply need to talk to him." Terra said.
"Gah, no way!!" Celes cried. "How embarassing!"
"It isn't that bad!" Terra exclaimed. "Just tell him how you feel. Say 'Locke...there is something that has been bothering me about us lately. You told me how you feel about me, and now I will do the same for you...'"
"It is not that easy..." Celes said softly.
"This, I know." Terra said. "But...you must have proper timing to make it easier on yourself. Tell him when you two are alone, and nothing in the world can stop you. The words will flow right through you as if you had practiced them for years!"
"And what should I do about his reaction?" Celes asked.
"Expect the worst?" Terra suggested. "That way, when he tells you how he really feels, you'll feel great!" She giggled a little.
Celes sighed. "Hmmmph...can't believe I'm gonna go through with this...."
"Oh, I'm so happy for you!" Terra exclaimed, and hugged Celes. "You'll really be glad you did, promise..."
Celes smiled a little and nodded, but her mind could not help but waunder back to that horrible nightmare she had had. What did it mean exactly? Was it a figment of her messed up emotions, or something more? But Celes knew she had more important things to think about...like what she was going to say to Locke!
Celes didn't know quite how to react. She couldn't deny it though...she knew, in her heart, what she had wanted him to really say. And...he did not say it. Instead, he had said the worst possible thing to say, in her opinion...Celes couldn't stop herself from letting out the low moan of agony and pain that escaped her lips...
"Celes?" Locke cried, and suddenly released her. "Oh, I forgot about your back. Did I hurt you?"
Celes couldn't speak, so she merely nodded.
"I'm sorry." Locke said quickly, and smiled some. "Man, I'm just so glad to see you like this again...." Celes still couldn't reply, her heart still numb from the shock. She decided that this hurt ten times more then her last battle...
"Best friends, huh...." She murmured.
Locke smiled even wider at her saying it. He suddenly reached up and un- tied his bandana from his hair.
"Wh-what are you doing?" Celes questioned dully.
Locke took the bandana and handed it over to Celes.
"I want you to have this." Locke said. "Sort of as symbolism, of this day. Do you understand what I mean?"
"Yeah..." Celes replied, and felt the soft fabric between her fingers. Strangely enough though, she found that well...she didn't care...
"Thanks." Celes replied simply, her fingers now clutching it tightly.
"Now, lets get out of here." Locke said, and stood up. Celes just sat there dumbly for a moment, before standing up herself and slipping her hood back on with shaky fingers.
He'll....never see me as a lover now....or as anything closer then friends. Celes thought as they left South Figaro. Is this how I am doomed to be with him forever? Has fate shut the door in my face concerning my future with Locke? This can't be all! But....it....is....this is all it is.
**********
That evening, Celes told the Chancellor she could not make it to dinner with Edgar, Sabin, Terra, and Locke. She lied and said that the idea of food was not too appealing at the moment.
Edgar had arranged it so that Terra and Celes had their own rooms now, and Celes was sitting in hers, gazing out the glass doors that led to her balcony. It had long stopped raining, but evening was falling fast, and the sky was getting dark. Celes moaned again and slumped over on her bed. Despite this whole fiasco, she had still not shed one tear. Trying not to cry was exhausting enough, and Celes slipped into a deep sleep almost immediately.
"Celes...?"
Celes turned around and saw that Locke was in the doorway of her dressing room. When he saw her, his jaw dropped, and his face turned a deep crimson.
"Aye aye aye! Izzat....you!?"
Celes smirked and put her hands on her hips, her formal gown swishing a bit over the floor. Locke blinked and tried to pull himself together.
"Gah....um....uh..."
Celes suddenly dropped her smirk and looked over Locke carefully.
"Locke?"
"Uh-huh?"
Celes took a step forward towards him.
"Why did you save me back there?"
"What!?" Locke cried. "Come on, I told you already. It's cause I wanted to!"
"Really?" Celes questioned, and took another step closer. "Locke...I think.....somewhere inside, you were really saving Rachel, wern't you? Is that.....it?"
Locke couldn't bear to look at her any longer. He turned around and lowered his eyes.
"That....ribbon suits you."
Celes blinked and ran her fingers over the violet ribbon weaved in her hair.
"Maybe you had better run through that script one last time..." Locke said.
Celes turned to scan through her scriptbook, but when she turned the pages, she saw that they were all empty!
"What!?" Celes cried. "What kind of joke is this?! She frantically tried to find her part, but found nothing but all white. Suddenly, the book got warmer and warmer, until it burst into flame, without any warning to Celes! Celes screamed and pulled her hands back, seeing that her hands were badly burnt by the flame. She turned around, and saw that Locke was gone too!
"Noooooo!" Celes cried, her hands seething with pain. "Somebody help me!"
"Celes! Wake up!"
"Huh?"
"Wake up! You were having a nightmare!"
Celes opened her eyes slowly and saw that she was still in her bedroom at the palace. Sunlight was pouring through the glass doors and windows, washing over her. She looked at her bedside, and saw Terra. Terra was gazing down at her, with worry in her eyes.
"Celes, you were having a bad dream?" She asked.
"Yeah..." Celes nodded, and yawned. "What an awful night..."
"Did something happen with Locke?" Terra questioned immediately. "Is that why you did not join us at dinner last night?"
"Well, not exactly." Celes replied nervousy.
"Oh.....please share it with me..." Terra said softly, and sat down beside Celes. "Maybe I can help?"
Celes sighed, and decided not to keep it in any longer.
After a long, long time's worth of explaining, Terra nodded in understanding, and Celes collapsed back on her pillows.
"Do you know what I am going through?" Celes asked. "I cannot tell if this is normal or not..."
"This is quite normal." Terra offered. She sighed. "And the advice I am going to give you....you may not want to do it..."
"What is it?!" Celes cried.
"You simply need to talk to him." Terra said.
"Gah, no way!!" Celes cried. "How embarassing!"
"It isn't that bad!" Terra exclaimed. "Just tell him how you feel. Say 'Locke...there is something that has been bothering me about us lately. You told me how you feel about me, and now I will do the same for you...'"
"It is not that easy..." Celes said softly.
"This, I know." Terra said. "But...you must have proper timing to make it easier on yourself. Tell him when you two are alone, and nothing in the world can stop you. The words will flow right through you as if you had practiced them for years!"
"And what should I do about his reaction?" Celes asked.
"Expect the worst?" Terra suggested. "That way, when he tells you how he really feels, you'll feel great!" She giggled a little.
Celes sighed. "Hmmmph...can't believe I'm gonna go through with this...."
"Oh, I'm so happy for you!" Terra exclaimed, and hugged Celes. "You'll really be glad you did, promise..."
Celes smiled a little and nodded, but her mind could not help but waunder back to that horrible nightmare she had had. What did it mean exactly? Was it a figment of her messed up emotions, or something more? But Celes knew she had more important things to think about...like what she was going to say to Locke!