Title: Struggle
Part: 31/31
Author: Issei
Genre: Yaoi
Paring: Hee Make a guess…
Rating: PG
Archive: Sdfic ML , Jem's homepage and www.fanfiction.net!
1
2 Apologise for any grammar and spelling errors
Disclaimer: the characters do not belong to me……dun sue!!
3
Warning: The characters may be OOC.
Writer's Note: Finally, I have completed the whole fic. *Bounce around* after a long 8 months or so. This is going to be long, about the length of two chapters… well hope you had be able to enjoy it, because there will be no more afterwards! And please leave your comments behind!
4 Words in * * is action
5 Words in ^ ^ is character's thoughts
Words in [ ] refer to the setting
Words in ( ) are words by writer…^_______^
5.1 Epilogue
The morning sun rose slowly from the horizon, its rays brightening the dark sky, as time passed, the sky turned from a navy blue to a brilliant clear blue sky. Yet, the winds were cold, winter was not over. But soon, it will end as spring embraced the land again. The snows on the streets were already forming puddles on the ground, the frosted windows were clear again. The air of spring was arriving, but when, nobody had a clue, there was only anticipation.
It was two days after the closing ceremony of the Winter Championships and the team was back in school again. This was their last training before they break for exams and would only return to train during March. Exams start in February and it was already January, they had barely one month before the exams and had lots to catch up on. The team was not in their best of moods; there was no joy, no cheer amongst the players. No one was smiling, only grim faces. They had lost their captain overnight and had absolutely no idea how they were going to carry on.
Ayako saw the team in depression; something that was not to be allowed on her team. No, they will have to carry on despite all the happening and they will carry on. There will be new players joining them in April and if they were lucky enough, they would be able to get some good year ones. That was her only hope. She had prayed their captain would stay but to avail, there was no sight of him and he was always the earliest there. Ayako forced the thoughts behind her, she had to stand strong, she will have to carry on, she will not let the team shatter. Yet, the vivid feelings swelled up in her, like the opening of a floodgate, her emotions gushing out, drowning her…
[Flashback]
She was lying on her stomach on her bed, a team photo spread out before her. She turned herself around and stretched, her gaze falling onto a clock on the wall. Half past nine the clock hands showed. What a beautiful morning, she had not gotten the chance to sleep late for many a night. The reason- Her thoughts were being cut off. The reason, the reason, she dashed out of her bed and grabbed some clothes out form the wardrobe and in a flash, she was on her way to the train station. Ryota was leaving at ten. She must at least send him off, if she could not make him stay, she had something to tell him, something important…
At last, she made it to the train station at ten, yet she caught no sight of him. No matter how many a time she looked, she did not find him. She had lost him amidst the crowd. Eventually, she only watched as the train rolled by in front of her, reminding her of her defeat of her lost, forever.
[End of flashback]
She forced herself to carry on, she banished the thoughts to her back of her mind. And it was to stay there she told herself. With her usual energetic self, she went around with her paper fan and started whacking people with it.
Ayako: You, you and you, now get up and start practising, this may be the last training but it will not be any easier than before. Get onto your feet.
The players who were in gloom saw the seriousness in Ayako's eyes and the adrenaline pumped in them again, there was a renewed energy to fight again. They could carry on if Ayako could, they will carry on because they were part of the Shohoku team.
As the team's sprit picked up, a lone figure walked briskly into the courts and began apologising profusely about being late and all. But seeing the stunned look on the faces of everyone, he stopped half way. Then from amidst the silent, came a voice.
Voice: Miyagi! Miyagi, you are back.
Then as if by magic, everyone started moving again, except for two persons. Ayako stood stock still, as if still in shocked.
Ayako: ^He did not go. ^
It was the only thought that ran through her mind, nothing else. Her joy was indescribable. Her joy was overwhelming she was simply too happy, too elated to see him, so much that the sudden change in emotions caught her too quickly and she had not recovered from it all. Rukawa stood away from the rest. It had come to him as a shock, but he knew he had been able to carry on with or without Ryota. Yet, he was glad he came back; the team would be stronger this way. There was no panic in him except for an answer, a long awaited answer. As everyone crowed around the captain, there were exclaims and explanation made. Then as the commotion went on, another person joined them. Hanamichi entered the court, an angry look on his face.
Hanamichi: Ryota, Haven't I told you to wait for me.
Ryota: Sorry. But I was not going to be later than you.
Hanamichi: What!
When finally Ryota got tired of all the attention (does he?) and announced that he would tell them as much as they wanted to know when training ended. And with that, he led the team on to a fruitful training.
Ayako remained quiet, she thought she would have lots to tell him about, but she was speechless now and she simply watched the training go on. However, Rukawa was more interested with the reason why the two- Hanamichi and Ryota had came together. And Hanamichi seemed to know everything before hand. What was going? He wanted to know. He wanted to know badly.
When the break came, the tired players trooped off to the water cooler or headed for their bottles. Rukawa took this chance to approach the red head. He sat down beside him and asked.
Rukawa: Sakuragi, Erm, how come Ryota came with you?
Hanamichi looked up and stared in disbelief. What other shocking thing was this raven hair boy going to do? He had actually wanted to know about others. Taken aback, Hanamichi simply told him everything.
Hanamichi: On that day he was supposed to leave, he looked me up at my house. And asked if my offer is still up. Offer? What offer? I thought to myself. Then he reminded me that I had promised to let him stay at my house if he wanted to. So, he is staying at my house now. And if you think that he is running away from home, he did not. He had begged his parents to let him stay on the condition that he would work hard to get into the university. Seemed impossible to me though, how was he going to get in, most probably only with basketball.
Hanamichi gave a shrugged and realised that he had said quite a lot and remembering the tense situation between them. Hanamichi felt the stress on him again. He knew he had to tell him his decision. But he did not know how. But he knew he would tell him. Hanamichi knew that the fox boy would ask him for an answer in his next question and quickly avoided the question.
Hanamichi: I think we better get back onto the court, break is almost over.
With that, he left Rukawa alone sitting by himself.
It was break and Ryota moved toward the Ayako that had been usually quiet. She had not said a word since his returned. He approached her and declared.
Ryota: I am back, Ayako.
As if still somewhere far off, she only nodded and said nothing more. Ryota eyed her worriedly; he did not know what was wrong. Quiet was not the word to describe her. He tried again.
Ryota: Ayako? Anything wrong?
This time she replied. Her shoulders seemed to be quivering slightly.
Ayako: Nothing. Welcome back Ryota. Glad that you came back.
Ryota: Are you sure?
Ayako: Yes and so how come you came back. I thought you were so sure about leaving.
There was a hint of hurt and sarcasm in her words. And Ryota knew at that moment, she was angry, an anger that was directed at him.
Ryota: Well, I asked my parents to let me stay and they agreed. I will be joining them in Tokyo after high school and I am staying with Hanamichi now. And all these thanks to Mitsui, he came on that night and talked to me. And where is he now, I had not seen him at all this morning.
Ayako: I see. He is sick, down with flu, he called me this morning and said he was not coming. If he know you came back, he would be so glad.
Ryota: He knew already, I looked him up yesterday but he looked fine then.
Ryota wanted to say more, but the break was over. And he had no choice but to go back on court.
The training ended as Ryota briefed the team for the last time before their long break in the changing room.
Ryota: Firstly, I would like to apologise for causing any distress to anyone of you and I am not going to leave this team until after the IH competitions. And well the long break is coming and there will be no more activities until after the exams but do go for a jog once in a while and try to maintain your agility and fitness. Lastly, please study hard because if you happen to do badly, you will not be able to play in the team due to the school rules set by the school which everyone of you should know, especially you and you.
He looked at the two year ones, Rukawa and Hanamichi. Rukawa as usual was half asleep through the briefing showed no sign that he was even listening while Hanamichi was fuming proclaiming that he was the tensai again.
When the "tensai" finally settled down again, Ryota continued with his briefing.
Ryota: And well, that is all for now, the first training is on the Saturday of the last week of the exams. Any changes, you would be informed. All right, you are dismissed.
As soon as Ryota said the word " dismissed" everyone begin chattering, telling one another about how they were going to study for exams asking if they wanted to meet up for a training session of their own. They went on and on while they prepared to leave. Ryota knew he had to appease Ayako and pulled her to a side as she was going out of the changing room. Ayako caught by surprise used her fist to punch her "attacker" and Ryota was hit squarely on his chin. Ayako turned around and saw that it was Ryota and quickly rushed forward to tend to him.
Ayako: Are you all right? Sorry about that, thought you were some pervert.
Ryota: You have not change one bit, still as violent as before.
Ryota laughed as he remembered the times when he got hit and punched by Ayako. Yet, he still liked her. Ayako looked guiltily at the swelling chin and started towards the changing room to get the first aid kit.
Ayako: You hang on for a minute; I will go get the first aid kit.
But before she could run away, Ryota caught hold of her.
Ryota: I will not leave you again.
Ryota blurted out and looked away, at the same time letting her go. Yet Ayako did not go. She had always felt irritated by Ryota and his plans to get her out on a date with her. He was always immature then. But this time she knew he was dead serious and she too had been touched. She knew she will never be able to get rid of him and she knew she would not want to anyway.
Ayako: You better not.
Ayako gave him a grin and ran off for the first aid kit. Ryota looked up in shock.
Ryota: What did you say?
He asked but Ayako was nowhere in sight. Instead, Hanamichi peeked out from behind the wall and answered him.
Hanamichi: She said you had better not.
Hanamichi gave Ryota a smile and put out his hand.
Hanamichi: Congrats, your wish had been fulfilled!
Ryota numbingly reached out for his hand and was still in too much a shock. He had succeeded. All this while, his efforts had paid off and he felt like announcing it to the whole world. He was elated. The amount of joy trapped in him was overwhelming. He had won his princess's heart.
Hanamichi watched as Ryota rejoiced. He was heading for the court when he saw the couple before him. As much as he did not want to watch the two, his curiosity forced him to stay behind. How he wished he could join in on Ryota's celebrations, but he had something else in mind. He had to let his decision be known. He had to find Rukawa and there was nowhere else better than to find him at the basketball courts.
He pushed the door opened and as he expected, Rukawa was practising his shoots alone. Hanamichi allowed himself to watch for a while the near perfect execution of shoots and when finally Rukawa came to a rest. He coughed a little and walked towards the raven hair boy.
Hanamichi: Erm, Rukawa…
He could not bring himself to say out the words. They were stuck in his throat, refusing to come out. By then Rukawa had already stopped his shooting and was gazing straight at Hanamichi in the eye, waiting for his response. When Hanamichi did not say anything, Rukawa decided it was his turn to ask him.
Rukawa: I wonder if you have come to a decision yet.
Hanamichi: Yes, I have.
Hanamichi replied quickly, that was why he was here. Rukawa awaits the decision, his mind was swirling, he was panicking. Hw was not prepared, but he knew he had to stay clam and he maintained his silence, awaiting the judgement to be mend out. Then Hanamichi finally found the words and in one long breath, he told Rukawa his decision.
Hanamichi: I am… sorry Rukawa. But I cannot accept you. Or rather, I like someone else already. I didn't know when it all started, but it did anyway. And I am sorry, I know you had been trying to win me over all this while but no, I think we could only be friends. Good friends and team mates we can be and nothing more. I will not avoid you, but I will think of you no more than a friend. Sorry if I have hurt you in anyway, but I no longer want this to drag on.
Hanamichi breathe out a sigh of relief, he had done it he had said all that he had planned to say. He waited for a while for Rukawa to say something, but he did not. And Hanamichi thought it was best for him to leave him alone; maybe when he got over it, they could be friends.
Rukawa felt his cold heart froze. At the moment when he heard the three words, "I am sorry". Those were not the three words he had wanted and now torn apart he did not know what to do. He had no idea how to react, he knew he had to do something or at least say something. Then as if by instinct, he asked.
Rukawa: Who is that someone? Mitsui sempai?
Hanamichi turned and face the fox boy again. He owned him an explanation at least but he did not want to push the knife deeper into he wounds of an injured man. But he knew Rukawa would want to know before he would be satisfied.
Hanamichi: Yes, it is him.
Rukawa: Does he know?
Hanamichi: No, but I will look him up later to tell him.
Rukawa: Good luck then and we are still friends right?
Hanamichi smiled, he had not expected Rukawa to be this gracious.
Hanamichi: Yes, we still are.
Hanamichi gave a wave and left Rukawa with his basketball. Rukawa had a look of disbelief painted on his face. What had he just said, he did not know. But he had put up a brave front and congratulated his enemy. Was he crazy, he did not know, but maybe he was, after all. After all, he had nothing much left to love except for his basketball. He was once again back at the same point, the point where only coldness lived and the warmth he thought he had found was only a dream. And now he was denied of even a dream, banished forever into the deep coldness.
The songbirds were back again and the days were warmer. The winter cold had been locked up in the wheel of time and was not to come in another year. And for that one-year, they could enjoy the warm sun. Two boys were standing near a blooming sakura tree beside a river. Thousands of flowers covered the tree a healthy pink. They were both panting hard, tired from the long run. One of the boys looked as if he was on the brink of collapsed, but the other still looked energetic.
Hanamichi: Micchy, get up and continue!
Mitsui: Let me rest for a while and what a beautiful morning, can't you just sit down and enjoy the scenery.
Hanamichi: No, you are supposed to build up on your stamina not go on a tour.
Mitsui: But-
Hanamichi did not wait for Mitsui to say another word but dragged an unwilling Mitsui along.
On a bridge overlooking the very same river, another boy observed the two. How he wished he was with the red headed boy, running together. But he knew it was impossible. He had a notebook in his hand and a pen. He had enjoyed writing and drawing unknown to many, a quiet activity that allowed him to think and express his own feelings. He opened his notebook and in it was lines and lines of words and on some pages drawing, sketches of scenery and of people. He turned away from the river and leaned on the railings. He uncapped the pen and began to write.
There were no tears tonight.
Because they were trapped,
Behind a cold mask
How long it could last, I do not know.
Until the floodgate opens,
There will be no tears tonight.
Your firmness turned me away.
I did not persist.
There would be no answer,
No future.
Hard as I try,
All was in vain.
For your firmness turned me away.
And alone in a darkness I walked,
Away in defeat.
A cold solitary figure,
Against the dark of the world.
Until we meet again,
I shall but walk in the darkness alone.
Rukawa looked up from his notebook. He did not know how many times he had written such poems. He hated himself for that, he had to be strong, he still had basketball. Trying to pushed all his emotions away, he grabbed hold of the sheet of paper where the poem had been written and in one swift motion, he torn the paper out from the book and crashed it before he flung in now into the river, hoping that all his hurt and pain could be carried away by the river.
The paper was finally washed up against the bank, where the two boys came to rest. Sitting next to one another, they enjoyed the presence of the other in silent, when finally the younger boy spoke.
Hanamichi: Let's go. I need some food.
Mitsui: Let's stay a while more, it is a beautiful day with such good weather moreover, the exams are just over so let's just relax.
Hanamichi: But-
Mitsui: Just say for another ten more minutes?
Hanamichi: Fine then.
The two boys stayed under the blue sky and white fluffy clouds, beside the clear river, enjoying the peace. Then they finally picked themselves up from the riverbank and hand in hand returned to the bustling streets of the city. They were contended. They had found what they wanted in life.
5.1.1 OWARI
Yeah! I am finally done with this fic! It took me more than half a year to write that… and it is my first ever fic so do give me your opinions. I know many of you might not like the pairing and may be disappointed with the ending. But I did give my best to the fic and hope all of you will like it. Thanks, to all who had read this fic and those who had commented on the fic. Thanks to many people who had been very supportive through out the whole writing process. I had struggled through it and guess it is time for a break… I will not be writing again in sometime to come and well that is all folks! Please leave your C&Cs behind, I would love to hear what you all have to say about the fic.
Issei_kun_@hotmail.com
Part: 31/31
Author: Issei
Genre: Yaoi
Paring: Hee Make a guess…
Rating: PG
Archive: Sdfic ML , Jem's homepage and www.fanfiction.net!
1
2 Apologise for any grammar and spelling errors
Disclaimer: the characters do not belong to me……dun sue!!
3
Warning: The characters may be OOC.
Writer's Note: Finally, I have completed the whole fic. *Bounce around* after a long 8 months or so. This is going to be long, about the length of two chapters… well hope you had be able to enjoy it, because there will be no more afterwards! And please leave your comments behind!
4 Words in * * is action
5 Words in ^ ^ is character's thoughts
Words in [ ] refer to the setting
Words in ( ) are words by writer…^_______^
5.1 Epilogue
The morning sun rose slowly from the horizon, its rays brightening the dark sky, as time passed, the sky turned from a navy blue to a brilliant clear blue sky. Yet, the winds were cold, winter was not over. But soon, it will end as spring embraced the land again. The snows on the streets were already forming puddles on the ground, the frosted windows were clear again. The air of spring was arriving, but when, nobody had a clue, there was only anticipation.
It was two days after the closing ceremony of the Winter Championships and the team was back in school again. This was their last training before they break for exams and would only return to train during March. Exams start in February and it was already January, they had barely one month before the exams and had lots to catch up on. The team was not in their best of moods; there was no joy, no cheer amongst the players. No one was smiling, only grim faces. They had lost their captain overnight and had absolutely no idea how they were going to carry on.
Ayako saw the team in depression; something that was not to be allowed on her team. No, they will have to carry on despite all the happening and they will carry on. There will be new players joining them in April and if they were lucky enough, they would be able to get some good year ones. That was her only hope. She had prayed their captain would stay but to avail, there was no sight of him and he was always the earliest there. Ayako forced the thoughts behind her, she had to stand strong, she will have to carry on, she will not let the team shatter. Yet, the vivid feelings swelled up in her, like the opening of a floodgate, her emotions gushing out, drowning her…
[Flashback]
She was lying on her stomach on her bed, a team photo spread out before her. She turned herself around and stretched, her gaze falling onto a clock on the wall. Half past nine the clock hands showed. What a beautiful morning, she had not gotten the chance to sleep late for many a night. The reason- Her thoughts were being cut off. The reason, the reason, she dashed out of her bed and grabbed some clothes out form the wardrobe and in a flash, she was on her way to the train station. Ryota was leaving at ten. She must at least send him off, if she could not make him stay, she had something to tell him, something important…
At last, she made it to the train station at ten, yet she caught no sight of him. No matter how many a time she looked, she did not find him. She had lost him amidst the crowd. Eventually, she only watched as the train rolled by in front of her, reminding her of her defeat of her lost, forever.
[End of flashback]
She forced herself to carry on, she banished the thoughts to her back of her mind. And it was to stay there she told herself. With her usual energetic self, she went around with her paper fan and started whacking people with it.
Ayako: You, you and you, now get up and start practising, this may be the last training but it will not be any easier than before. Get onto your feet.
The players who were in gloom saw the seriousness in Ayako's eyes and the adrenaline pumped in them again, there was a renewed energy to fight again. They could carry on if Ayako could, they will carry on because they were part of the Shohoku team.
As the team's sprit picked up, a lone figure walked briskly into the courts and began apologising profusely about being late and all. But seeing the stunned look on the faces of everyone, he stopped half way. Then from amidst the silent, came a voice.
Voice: Miyagi! Miyagi, you are back.
Then as if by magic, everyone started moving again, except for two persons. Ayako stood stock still, as if still in shocked.
Ayako: ^He did not go. ^
It was the only thought that ran through her mind, nothing else. Her joy was indescribable. Her joy was overwhelming she was simply too happy, too elated to see him, so much that the sudden change in emotions caught her too quickly and she had not recovered from it all. Rukawa stood away from the rest. It had come to him as a shock, but he knew he had been able to carry on with or without Ryota. Yet, he was glad he came back; the team would be stronger this way. There was no panic in him except for an answer, a long awaited answer. As everyone crowed around the captain, there were exclaims and explanation made. Then as the commotion went on, another person joined them. Hanamichi entered the court, an angry look on his face.
Hanamichi: Ryota, Haven't I told you to wait for me.
Ryota: Sorry. But I was not going to be later than you.
Hanamichi: What!
When finally Ryota got tired of all the attention (does he?) and announced that he would tell them as much as they wanted to know when training ended. And with that, he led the team on to a fruitful training.
Ayako remained quiet, she thought she would have lots to tell him about, but she was speechless now and she simply watched the training go on. However, Rukawa was more interested with the reason why the two- Hanamichi and Ryota had came together. And Hanamichi seemed to know everything before hand. What was going? He wanted to know. He wanted to know badly.
When the break came, the tired players trooped off to the water cooler or headed for their bottles. Rukawa took this chance to approach the red head. He sat down beside him and asked.
Rukawa: Sakuragi, Erm, how come Ryota came with you?
Hanamichi looked up and stared in disbelief. What other shocking thing was this raven hair boy going to do? He had actually wanted to know about others. Taken aback, Hanamichi simply told him everything.
Hanamichi: On that day he was supposed to leave, he looked me up at my house. And asked if my offer is still up. Offer? What offer? I thought to myself. Then he reminded me that I had promised to let him stay at my house if he wanted to. So, he is staying at my house now. And if you think that he is running away from home, he did not. He had begged his parents to let him stay on the condition that he would work hard to get into the university. Seemed impossible to me though, how was he going to get in, most probably only with basketball.
Hanamichi gave a shrugged and realised that he had said quite a lot and remembering the tense situation between them. Hanamichi felt the stress on him again. He knew he had to tell him his decision. But he did not know how. But he knew he would tell him. Hanamichi knew that the fox boy would ask him for an answer in his next question and quickly avoided the question.
Hanamichi: I think we better get back onto the court, break is almost over.
With that, he left Rukawa alone sitting by himself.
It was break and Ryota moved toward the Ayako that had been usually quiet. She had not said a word since his returned. He approached her and declared.
Ryota: I am back, Ayako.
As if still somewhere far off, she only nodded and said nothing more. Ryota eyed her worriedly; he did not know what was wrong. Quiet was not the word to describe her. He tried again.
Ryota: Ayako? Anything wrong?
This time she replied. Her shoulders seemed to be quivering slightly.
Ayako: Nothing. Welcome back Ryota. Glad that you came back.
Ryota: Are you sure?
Ayako: Yes and so how come you came back. I thought you were so sure about leaving.
There was a hint of hurt and sarcasm in her words. And Ryota knew at that moment, she was angry, an anger that was directed at him.
Ryota: Well, I asked my parents to let me stay and they agreed. I will be joining them in Tokyo after high school and I am staying with Hanamichi now. And all these thanks to Mitsui, he came on that night and talked to me. And where is he now, I had not seen him at all this morning.
Ayako: I see. He is sick, down with flu, he called me this morning and said he was not coming. If he know you came back, he would be so glad.
Ryota: He knew already, I looked him up yesterday but he looked fine then.
Ryota wanted to say more, but the break was over. And he had no choice but to go back on court.
The training ended as Ryota briefed the team for the last time before their long break in the changing room.
Ryota: Firstly, I would like to apologise for causing any distress to anyone of you and I am not going to leave this team until after the IH competitions. And well the long break is coming and there will be no more activities until after the exams but do go for a jog once in a while and try to maintain your agility and fitness. Lastly, please study hard because if you happen to do badly, you will not be able to play in the team due to the school rules set by the school which everyone of you should know, especially you and you.
He looked at the two year ones, Rukawa and Hanamichi. Rukawa as usual was half asleep through the briefing showed no sign that he was even listening while Hanamichi was fuming proclaiming that he was the tensai again.
When the "tensai" finally settled down again, Ryota continued with his briefing.
Ryota: And well, that is all for now, the first training is on the Saturday of the last week of the exams. Any changes, you would be informed. All right, you are dismissed.
As soon as Ryota said the word " dismissed" everyone begin chattering, telling one another about how they were going to study for exams asking if they wanted to meet up for a training session of their own. They went on and on while they prepared to leave. Ryota knew he had to appease Ayako and pulled her to a side as she was going out of the changing room. Ayako caught by surprise used her fist to punch her "attacker" and Ryota was hit squarely on his chin. Ayako turned around and saw that it was Ryota and quickly rushed forward to tend to him.
Ayako: Are you all right? Sorry about that, thought you were some pervert.
Ryota: You have not change one bit, still as violent as before.
Ryota laughed as he remembered the times when he got hit and punched by Ayako. Yet, he still liked her. Ayako looked guiltily at the swelling chin and started towards the changing room to get the first aid kit.
Ayako: You hang on for a minute; I will go get the first aid kit.
But before she could run away, Ryota caught hold of her.
Ryota: I will not leave you again.
Ryota blurted out and looked away, at the same time letting her go. Yet Ayako did not go. She had always felt irritated by Ryota and his plans to get her out on a date with her. He was always immature then. But this time she knew he was dead serious and she too had been touched. She knew she will never be able to get rid of him and she knew she would not want to anyway.
Ayako: You better not.
Ayako gave him a grin and ran off for the first aid kit. Ryota looked up in shock.
Ryota: What did you say?
He asked but Ayako was nowhere in sight. Instead, Hanamichi peeked out from behind the wall and answered him.
Hanamichi: She said you had better not.
Hanamichi gave Ryota a smile and put out his hand.
Hanamichi: Congrats, your wish had been fulfilled!
Ryota numbingly reached out for his hand and was still in too much a shock. He had succeeded. All this while, his efforts had paid off and he felt like announcing it to the whole world. He was elated. The amount of joy trapped in him was overwhelming. He had won his princess's heart.
Hanamichi watched as Ryota rejoiced. He was heading for the court when he saw the couple before him. As much as he did not want to watch the two, his curiosity forced him to stay behind. How he wished he could join in on Ryota's celebrations, but he had something else in mind. He had to let his decision be known. He had to find Rukawa and there was nowhere else better than to find him at the basketball courts.
He pushed the door opened and as he expected, Rukawa was practising his shoots alone. Hanamichi allowed himself to watch for a while the near perfect execution of shoots and when finally Rukawa came to a rest. He coughed a little and walked towards the raven hair boy.
Hanamichi: Erm, Rukawa…
He could not bring himself to say out the words. They were stuck in his throat, refusing to come out. By then Rukawa had already stopped his shooting and was gazing straight at Hanamichi in the eye, waiting for his response. When Hanamichi did not say anything, Rukawa decided it was his turn to ask him.
Rukawa: I wonder if you have come to a decision yet.
Hanamichi: Yes, I have.
Hanamichi replied quickly, that was why he was here. Rukawa awaits the decision, his mind was swirling, he was panicking. Hw was not prepared, but he knew he had to stay clam and he maintained his silence, awaiting the judgement to be mend out. Then Hanamichi finally found the words and in one long breath, he told Rukawa his decision.
Hanamichi: I am… sorry Rukawa. But I cannot accept you. Or rather, I like someone else already. I didn't know when it all started, but it did anyway. And I am sorry, I know you had been trying to win me over all this while but no, I think we could only be friends. Good friends and team mates we can be and nothing more. I will not avoid you, but I will think of you no more than a friend. Sorry if I have hurt you in anyway, but I no longer want this to drag on.
Hanamichi breathe out a sigh of relief, he had done it he had said all that he had planned to say. He waited for a while for Rukawa to say something, but he did not. And Hanamichi thought it was best for him to leave him alone; maybe when he got over it, they could be friends.
Rukawa felt his cold heart froze. At the moment when he heard the three words, "I am sorry". Those were not the three words he had wanted and now torn apart he did not know what to do. He had no idea how to react, he knew he had to do something or at least say something. Then as if by instinct, he asked.
Rukawa: Who is that someone? Mitsui sempai?
Hanamichi turned and face the fox boy again. He owned him an explanation at least but he did not want to push the knife deeper into he wounds of an injured man. But he knew Rukawa would want to know before he would be satisfied.
Hanamichi: Yes, it is him.
Rukawa: Does he know?
Hanamichi: No, but I will look him up later to tell him.
Rukawa: Good luck then and we are still friends right?
Hanamichi smiled, he had not expected Rukawa to be this gracious.
Hanamichi: Yes, we still are.
Hanamichi gave a wave and left Rukawa with his basketball. Rukawa had a look of disbelief painted on his face. What had he just said, he did not know. But he had put up a brave front and congratulated his enemy. Was he crazy, he did not know, but maybe he was, after all. After all, he had nothing much left to love except for his basketball. He was once again back at the same point, the point where only coldness lived and the warmth he thought he had found was only a dream. And now he was denied of even a dream, banished forever into the deep coldness.
The songbirds were back again and the days were warmer. The winter cold had been locked up in the wheel of time and was not to come in another year. And for that one-year, they could enjoy the warm sun. Two boys were standing near a blooming sakura tree beside a river. Thousands of flowers covered the tree a healthy pink. They were both panting hard, tired from the long run. One of the boys looked as if he was on the brink of collapsed, but the other still looked energetic.
Hanamichi: Micchy, get up and continue!
Mitsui: Let me rest for a while and what a beautiful morning, can't you just sit down and enjoy the scenery.
Hanamichi: No, you are supposed to build up on your stamina not go on a tour.
Mitsui: But-
Hanamichi did not wait for Mitsui to say another word but dragged an unwilling Mitsui along.
On a bridge overlooking the very same river, another boy observed the two. How he wished he was with the red headed boy, running together. But he knew it was impossible. He had a notebook in his hand and a pen. He had enjoyed writing and drawing unknown to many, a quiet activity that allowed him to think and express his own feelings. He opened his notebook and in it was lines and lines of words and on some pages drawing, sketches of scenery and of people. He turned away from the river and leaned on the railings. He uncapped the pen and began to write.
There were no tears tonight.
Because they were trapped,
Behind a cold mask
How long it could last, I do not know.
Until the floodgate opens,
There will be no tears tonight.
Your firmness turned me away.
I did not persist.
There would be no answer,
No future.
Hard as I try,
All was in vain.
For your firmness turned me away.
And alone in a darkness I walked,
Away in defeat.
A cold solitary figure,
Against the dark of the world.
Until we meet again,
I shall but walk in the darkness alone.
Rukawa looked up from his notebook. He did not know how many times he had written such poems. He hated himself for that, he had to be strong, he still had basketball. Trying to pushed all his emotions away, he grabbed hold of the sheet of paper where the poem had been written and in one swift motion, he torn the paper out from the book and crashed it before he flung in now into the river, hoping that all his hurt and pain could be carried away by the river.
The paper was finally washed up against the bank, where the two boys came to rest. Sitting next to one another, they enjoyed the presence of the other in silent, when finally the younger boy spoke.
Hanamichi: Let's go. I need some food.
Mitsui: Let's stay a while more, it is a beautiful day with such good weather moreover, the exams are just over so let's just relax.
Hanamichi: But-
Mitsui: Just say for another ten more minutes?
Hanamichi: Fine then.
The two boys stayed under the blue sky and white fluffy clouds, beside the clear river, enjoying the peace. Then they finally picked themselves up from the riverbank and hand in hand returned to the bustling streets of the city. They were contended. They had found what they wanted in life.
5.1.1 OWARI
Yeah! I am finally done with this fic! It took me more than half a year to write that… and it is my first ever fic so do give me your opinions. I know many of you might not like the pairing and may be disappointed with the ending. But I did give my best to the fic and hope all of you will like it. Thanks, to all who had read this fic and those who had commented on the fic. Thanks to many people who had been very supportive through out the whole writing process. I had struggled through it and guess it is time for a break… I will not be writing again in sometime to come and well that is all folks! Please leave your C&Cs behind, I would love to hear what you all have to say about the fic.
Issei_kun_@hotmail.com