19 short Harry Potter stories inspired by Barenaked Ladies songs
AN: Just what the title says. I have a CD of their greatest hits, 1991- 2001, and all these have one line from the song, and are about a paragraph each.
1: The Old Apartment
(Takes place 10 years after Hogwarts, HP days. R and H and their children.)
"You know, 'Mione, we should take Ella, John and Luka (Borrowed, I am aware) to Hogwarts." "Yeah. EL! JOHN! LUKEY! Please go to the fireplace."
~This is where we used to live, broken glass, broken hearts and broken bones, this is where we used to live~
"Where are we going?" John asked. "To our old house. HOGWARTS!" yelled Hermione. "Whoa," breathed Ella. "I don't see anything but a ruin," Luka remarked. "Uh oh," said Hermione "take him home, Ron," "All right. Castlebrook!" ~this is where we used to live, broken glass broken hearts and broken bones; this is where we used to live. ~
"Well, guys, this is where we used to live."
2: Falling for the First Time
(The Marauders and Lily's first year. Lily isn't quite fitting in. Lily, James, Sirius, Peter and Remus.)
~I'm so cool; too bad I'm a loser. I'm so smart; too bad I can't get anything figured out. I'm so brave; too bad I'm a baby. I'm so fly, that's probably why it feels like I'm falling for the first time. ~
Lily Evans didn't fit in. She had always been a bit odd, but here, she was the biggest loser in the world. Boy, she could do magic, that was true, but she couldn't find the toilets, the classrooms or anything, which made her the laughingstock of the school. She was a BABY! And she HATED that James Potter. Loathed, really. 'Oh well,' she thought to herself. "Better get to potions.' Quickly, she put all of her angry thoughts out of her head and headed to potions class with renewed confidence.
3: Brian Wilson
(Hp times. After a long day, Hermione thinks about a lot of things, including a secret… 7th year)
~Lying in bed, just like Brian Wilson did, oh yeah, I'm lying in bed, just like Brian Wilson did, just starin' at the ceiling~
Hermione Granger flopped on the bed. The child inside of her kicked angrily. She climbed under the covers, and stared at the ceiling. 'Well,' she thought. 'Today was the longest day EVER!' "Mmph!" she said, shooting up suddenly. The pain disappeared, and she lay back down. 'Arrgh. This baby won't be a secret much longer,' she thought. "Mmph!" she said, as another contraction came, she wriggled out of bed. "Ron," she said softly, entering the boy's dormitories. "Ron, you need to come. I-" Hermione stopped short and gasped. Ron looked alarmed. "Hermione, it's okay, really. Hang on! I'll get Madame Pomfrey. Lay down." Ron bolted form the room. Hermione lay down on the bed. Madame Pomfrey and Ron entered as a contraction came. Hermione moaned, and Madame Pomfrey gave instructions. Hours later, a tired Hermione held her daughter, and stared up at the ceiling.
4: One Week
(MWPP days. A fight between a then-together Sirius and Lily)
~It's been one week since you looked at me, cocked your head to the side and said 'I'm angry'. It's been 5 days since you laughed at me, said, 'Get back together and come back and see me'~
"Lily, I'm-" "No need, Sirius. I am angry, and you don't look together yet," Lily said, surveying Sirius's rather dejected appearance. "And anyway," piped up Remus, it's two days till you actually make up." "Oh, yeah. Let's go play Quidditch. Bye, Lily!" Lily sighed. "Oh, Sirius. You are an idiot," she sighed, "go ahead. Play Quidditch."
5: Be My Yoko Ono
(HP days. Harry has a problem. Ginny is following him around. 2nd year.)
~You can be my Yoko Ono, you can follow me wherever I go~
"Oooh!" squealed a little redheaded SOMETHING and disappeared behind a suit of armor. "Ginny," Ron explained. "Oh," Harry replied, "Ron, you look peeved by something." Ron looked wistful. "I miss Hermione." Ron turned a deep scarlet. Harry put his arm on his best friend. "Quit following us, Gin- gin!" Ron yelled in exasperation. "No, that's okay," Harry, said to his friend. "Where're we goin'?" Ginny asked. "To Herbology," Harry answered. "Oh," said Ginny. She broke off, wandering around, humming.
~You can be my Yoko Ono, you can follow me wherever I go~
6: Alternative Girlfriend
(MWWP, James is dating an Elizabeth McCann. Lily is also going out with him. What will happen when he gets two dates the same night?)
~You're my alternative girlfriend; I love you, now you cannot pretend. Last night, we slept on the lawn, when you woke, I was gone, back to the dream I dream to leave My life with her is a bore ~
"Hello, Lily," James said nervously. Lily smiled. "Shall we dance?" "But of course." Lily and James danced for a while, and eventually collapsed onto the ground. Lily pointed out all the constellations until she fell asleep. James made sure she was indeed asleep, and snuck off to meet Elizabeth. "Hello, Lizzie," he said. Elizabeth and James headed to the Leaky Cauldron to go to the nightclub. They fell asleep in the common room together. When Lily awoke, James was gone.
~You're my alternative girlfriend, I love you, and you cannot pretend. ~
AN: I am going to post this now, and if I get 3 reviews, then, I'll do the rest.
AN: Just what the title says. I have a CD of their greatest hits, 1991- 2001, and all these have one line from the song, and are about a paragraph each.
1: The Old Apartment
(Takes place 10 years after Hogwarts, HP days. R and H and their children.)
"You know, 'Mione, we should take Ella, John and Luka (Borrowed, I am aware) to Hogwarts." "Yeah. EL! JOHN! LUKEY! Please go to the fireplace."
~This is where we used to live, broken glass, broken hearts and broken bones, this is where we used to live~
"Where are we going?" John asked. "To our old house. HOGWARTS!" yelled Hermione. "Whoa," breathed Ella. "I don't see anything but a ruin," Luka remarked. "Uh oh," said Hermione "take him home, Ron," "All right. Castlebrook!" ~this is where we used to live, broken glass broken hearts and broken bones; this is where we used to live. ~
"Well, guys, this is where we used to live."
2: Falling for the First Time
(The Marauders and Lily's first year. Lily isn't quite fitting in. Lily, James, Sirius, Peter and Remus.)
~I'm so cool; too bad I'm a loser. I'm so smart; too bad I can't get anything figured out. I'm so brave; too bad I'm a baby. I'm so fly, that's probably why it feels like I'm falling for the first time. ~
Lily Evans didn't fit in. She had always been a bit odd, but here, she was the biggest loser in the world. Boy, she could do magic, that was true, but she couldn't find the toilets, the classrooms or anything, which made her the laughingstock of the school. She was a BABY! And she HATED that James Potter. Loathed, really. 'Oh well,' she thought to herself. "Better get to potions.' Quickly, she put all of her angry thoughts out of her head and headed to potions class with renewed confidence.
3: Brian Wilson
(Hp times. After a long day, Hermione thinks about a lot of things, including a secret… 7th year)
~Lying in bed, just like Brian Wilson did, oh yeah, I'm lying in bed, just like Brian Wilson did, just starin' at the ceiling~
Hermione Granger flopped on the bed. The child inside of her kicked angrily. She climbed under the covers, and stared at the ceiling. 'Well,' she thought. 'Today was the longest day EVER!' "Mmph!" she said, shooting up suddenly. The pain disappeared, and she lay back down. 'Arrgh. This baby won't be a secret much longer,' she thought. "Mmph!" she said, as another contraction came, she wriggled out of bed. "Ron," she said softly, entering the boy's dormitories. "Ron, you need to come. I-" Hermione stopped short and gasped. Ron looked alarmed. "Hermione, it's okay, really. Hang on! I'll get Madame Pomfrey. Lay down." Ron bolted form the room. Hermione lay down on the bed. Madame Pomfrey and Ron entered as a contraction came. Hermione moaned, and Madame Pomfrey gave instructions. Hours later, a tired Hermione held her daughter, and stared up at the ceiling.
4: One Week
(MWPP days. A fight between a then-together Sirius and Lily)
~It's been one week since you looked at me, cocked your head to the side and said 'I'm angry'. It's been 5 days since you laughed at me, said, 'Get back together and come back and see me'~
"Lily, I'm-" "No need, Sirius. I am angry, and you don't look together yet," Lily said, surveying Sirius's rather dejected appearance. "And anyway," piped up Remus, it's two days till you actually make up." "Oh, yeah. Let's go play Quidditch. Bye, Lily!" Lily sighed. "Oh, Sirius. You are an idiot," she sighed, "go ahead. Play Quidditch."
5: Be My Yoko Ono
(HP days. Harry has a problem. Ginny is following him around. 2nd year.)
~You can be my Yoko Ono, you can follow me wherever I go~
"Oooh!" squealed a little redheaded SOMETHING and disappeared behind a suit of armor. "Ginny," Ron explained. "Oh," Harry replied, "Ron, you look peeved by something." Ron looked wistful. "I miss Hermione." Ron turned a deep scarlet. Harry put his arm on his best friend. "Quit following us, Gin- gin!" Ron yelled in exasperation. "No, that's okay," Harry, said to his friend. "Where're we goin'?" Ginny asked. "To Herbology," Harry answered. "Oh," said Ginny. She broke off, wandering around, humming.
~You can be my Yoko Ono, you can follow me wherever I go~
6: Alternative Girlfriend
(MWWP, James is dating an Elizabeth McCann. Lily is also going out with him. What will happen when he gets two dates the same night?)
~You're my alternative girlfriend; I love you, now you cannot pretend. Last night, we slept on the lawn, when you woke, I was gone, back to the dream I dream to leave My life with her is a bore ~
"Hello, Lily," James said nervously. Lily smiled. "Shall we dance?" "But of course." Lily and James danced for a while, and eventually collapsed onto the ground. Lily pointed out all the constellations until she fell asleep. James made sure she was indeed asleep, and snuck off to meet Elizabeth. "Hello, Lizzie," he said. Elizabeth and James headed to the Leaky Cauldron to go to the nightclub. They fell asleep in the common room together. When Lily awoke, James was gone.
~You're my alternative girlfriend, I love you, and you cannot pretend. ~
AN: I am going to post this now, and if I get 3 reviews, then, I'll do the rest.