Disclaimer in part One…….

6:00, Westchester

Cafeteria

            Kitty, Jubilee and Rogue entered the cafeteria, or 'food zoo' as it was more commonly referred too.  The place was crowded with all the mansion's inhabitants gathered at the mouth of the food line.  The girls walked up to the end of their line and were shocked when Rogue continued on to the front.

            "Hey, chica, uh the back of the line is you know, here" Jubilee pointed out to her best fried.

            "This is true.  Which is why I should be at the front. That tends to be the natural place on the evolutionary scale for us" she finished up sounding disturbingly smug.

            "Who put the crack in her salad?" Kitty asked her roommate.

            "I'm not sure.  She's been really weird all day," Jubes concluded while watching Rogue shove her way to the front of the line.

            After dinner, instead of clearing her place like everybody else, Rogue simply left her cup, utensils, and plate at the table.  Upon the curious looks she received, she reasoned, "we pay people to clean for us, why should I have to?"  

            Not getting the desired look of understanding, she simply shook her head and muttered "you simpletons" before waltzing out of the room.

            "I'm starting to think she needs an attitude adjustment" Kitty replied. 

            "I don't know, something weird happened with this jar earlier…"

            The two looked at each other briefly; "nah, that only happens in the movies" they said simultaneously and headed for the stairs. 

Elsewhere in New York……………

            "Victor would you get the door please?" 

            "What do I look like? A fuckin; butler?"

            "No, but should you fail to obey me, you're not getting any."

            "Fine, MissTake!" Victor spat at the blue woman.

            "Oh very mature" she answered and stuck her tongue out at him.

            Sighing in defeat, Sabertooth walked to the door and pulled it open.  What he saw on the other side of the door made him quake in his bones.

            "Hello, Sabertooth.  Or should I say, Mr. Biglesworth  number one?"  Dr. Evil inquired, uh evily.

            "That was a long time ago! You have not power over me" Victor shouted and ran away.  

            Shifting into a brunette, Mystique walked over and took in the man in the door.  "Well, any man that can scare Victor is certainly a friend of mine.  Please come in."

            Erik Lensher strode into the doorway shocked to see a congregant of people in the room.  "Having a party without me?"  

            "Hello Erik." 

            "Aevil"

            "Evil.  Dr. Evil." 

            "You never gave up that childish nickname?"

            "Riggghhht.  Everyone, this is my brother Erik, also know as "Magneto."  "Magneto this is Frau Farbisino, Number Two, Mini-me and my son, Scott Evil."

            "Charmed I'm sure. And to what do I owe this pleasure?"

            "I want to rid the world of, Austin Powers, and you will help me.  By taking over the world." 

            "And how do you presume to undertake such an ambitious plan?"

            "With a little something I call, "Kick ass me. I developed it myself." 

            "You ass, Frau did all the work" Scot interrupted

            "Scott, what have I told you about interrupting me when I'm talking to adults?"

            " What? You actually think he's gonna fall for that 'I made it myself' crap? God you're dumb."

            "The young man has a point" Erik interjected, ending the quarreling between the two. 

            "Let's cut the crap doctor and get right to the point."

            "Fine Erik.  I shall explain everything to you, if you let me stay here for a few days.  Hotels are so expensive, and they wanted to count Mini-me as a dog.

            "Agreed.  Now tell me, what does this potion of yours do?" 

            "It brings on a slight case of………egomania!"

Westchester: 

            Jubilee and Kitty had decided enough was enough and were taking matters into their own hands. 

            "Come in" Professor Xavier called when he heard the knock on his study. 

            "What can I help you with?"

            "It's about Rogue."   Jubilee began

            "She's been acting really weird Kitty continued.

            "We think you should call Logan.  She's starting to sound like Magneto again, but more stuck up."

            The girls told him everything, beginning with the broken bottle and ending with the latest incident.

            "She won't let either of us into out room.  She claims there is an IQ prerequisite and that we fall far below it" Kitty spat out.

            "Thank you for your time girls, I'm sure we will get this all straightened out, not I must ask you to excuse me, I have a phone call to make."

            A few minutes later, Charles wheeled himself into Cerebro to pinpoint Logan's location.  Once he had retrieved the hotel's name and phone number he headed back into his office and picked up the phone.  It rang seven times before being picked up.

            "Whadya want?"

            "Logan it's Charles Xavier.  I need you to fly to London immediately and retrieve Austin Powers."

            "What the fuck for?"

            "It's about Rogue.  There will be an airline ticket waiting for you at the counter of the nearest airport.  Contact me as soon as you get to London." He concluded before hanging up the phone.  He just hoped Austin and Logan would return in time before Rogue's head got any bigger.