VIII: Confession
Yuna opened her eyes, seeing the dried blood on her fingers. She had two long scrapes across each of her palms; not very deep, but they stung. She sat up and pushed the damp blanket off her shoulders. Her eyes rose to meet Lulu's concerned gaze. Lulu had stayed by her side the entire time she was asleep.
"I'm so sorry." Yuna felt terribly ashamed. "I was just being stupid. I wasn't thinking… I just wanted to see him again."
"Yuna. You know that's not the way."
"I know… I know. I wasn't thinking." Yuna examined the caked blood on her hands. "I don't want to die." Yuna whispered with a terrified quiver in her voice.
"You aren't going to die. I wont let you." Lulu watched Yuna try to rub her hands clean with the damp blanket. "It's on your face too." Lulu teased as she pointed to a streak of dried blood on Yuna's cheek. Then Yuna saw the spots of blood on Lulu's black dress.
"Oh, Lulu, your dress."
"It's okay. Let's go try to clean up." Lulu helped Yuna to her feet and the two girls walked over to the water. Yuna bent down and scooped her hands full of water to splash on her face.
"Lulu, I don't want them to see me like this. Can we stay out here for a while?"
Lulu nodded. "Let's take a walk."
Yuna was asleep for probably close to two hours, and now it was late afternoon. They walked though the quiet forest paths, not saying much. Yuna was glad to be alive. Birds chirped high among the tree tops, and butterflies weaved in and out of the branches. Yuna looked at the beautiful forest around her, the cascading waterfalls, and she remembered Tidus… she was happy. For the first time, she was able to think about her lost love without crying. A smile came to her face.
Lulu stopped walking. "Yuna?" Yuna turned to her friend. "Yuna, was it worth it?"
Yuna stopped to reflect. "I can still remember his deep blue eyes… and the way he held my face when he kissed me… and his hair; it was gold like the sun… and even though I feel like my heart has been ripped in two…" a single tear rolled down her cheek, "I wouldn't trade a second of the time I spent with him."
"Oh Yuna, I didn't want to make you cry. You looked so happy."
Yuna smiled. "I am happy. I just miss him… that's all. You know, Lulu. Like Chappu."
Lulu's dark eyes filled with sadness at the sound of his name. Not necessarily because she missed him, but because his death meant her eternal unhappiness. Yuna knew something was bothering her, but Lulu never talked about her own feelings. Lulu always seemed sad. She always carried an unspoken sorrow with her. "I'm sorry. I know you don't like to talk about that."
Lulu shook her head. 'I want to tell her.' Lulu thought. 'I have to tell this to someone.' "No… It's not quite like that. Chappu and I never had love like that." Yuna looked at her with astonishment. Lulu never spoke of her feelings for Chappu. She continued to reveal her deepest secret. "Chappu always said that I looked grumpy… I wasn't grumpy, I was sad… I am sad." Lulu burst into tears, rivers pouring from her brown eyes. Yuna had never seen Lulu cry before. No one had ever seen Lulu cry before. Lulu was always the one who had it all together. The one who Wakka talked to for hours, and the one who Rikku wanted to be like when she grew up. Lulu was the one who Yuna cried to, but now Lulu couldn't hold it in anymore. "Yuna…"
Yuna took her friend in her arms. "Lulu, tell me what's wrong."
"The minute I saw him, I knew that I loved him. But he was Chappu's brother, so I could never… he would never… I was going to tell Chappu, and then he… Now we can never be together."
Yuna didn't know what to say. They had always been such good friends. Finally, the source of Lulu's unhappiness was revealed. "Lulu, I never knew."
"No one knows, Yuna, you can't tell anyone."
"I promise."
The girls had been missing for hours now. Wakka had gone to look for them, and saw them on the path up ahead. When he got closer, he saw that Lulu was crying. He ducked behind a bush so he wouldn't be seen. Wakka stared in disbelief. He was worried. He knew she didn't get emotional over nothing. She must really be hurting.
"Hey! Whatcha lookin' at?" Rikku ran up behind him.
"Shhh! Be quiet!" Wakka ordered, and pulled Rikku behind the bush without taking his eyes off Lulu. Rikku parted the branches to see what was going on. "Oh, no. She's sad." Both of them watched with concern as Lulu wept in Yuna's arms.
"I wonder what they're saying." Wakka wondered out loud. "Let's go, ya? Before they see us."
Wakka and Rikku hurried back to town before the girls could find them hiding in the bushes. Wakka hurt inside for her. 'Don't cry, Lu. I hate to see you sad.'
Lulu dried her wet cheeks, as Yuna watched with concern. "Lulu, please promise me something… I won't tell anyone… But you have to tell Wakka."
Lulu shook her head. "I can't… he would never betray Chappu."
"Chappu would understand. He would want you both to be happy." Yuna took Lulu's hands and begged her. "Please Lulu, do it for me… I took for granted the time I had with Tidus, and now I'll never see him again… Promise me that you'll try." Lulu didn't answer. "Please Lulu?"
"I'll try." Lulu wasn't sure if she meant it. She wasn't sure that Chappu would understand. Even if Chappu did understand, she and Wakka were just friends. Wakka had never implied anything differently.
As the two girls returned to the village, Wakka watched Lulu in the corner of his eye. She was smiling, but her eyes were red and swollen. He wanted so much to run up and hug her; to kiss her and tell her that it would all be okay. But out of respect for his brother, he didn't.
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More on the way...
Darcee :)
Yuna opened her eyes, seeing the dried blood on her fingers. She had two long scrapes across each of her palms; not very deep, but they stung. She sat up and pushed the damp blanket off her shoulders. Her eyes rose to meet Lulu's concerned gaze. Lulu had stayed by her side the entire time she was asleep.
"I'm so sorry." Yuna felt terribly ashamed. "I was just being stupid. I wasn't thinking… I just wanted to see him again."
"Yuna. You know that's not the way."
"I know… I know. I wasn't thinking." Yuna examined the caked blood on her hands. "I don't want to die." Yuna whispered with a terrified quiver in her voice.
"You aren't going to die. I wont let you." Lulu watched Yuna try to rub her hands clean with the damp blanket. "It's on your face too." Lulu teased as she pointed to a streak of dried blood on Yuna's cheek. Then Yuna saw the spots of blood on Lulu's black dress.
"Oh, Lulu, your dress."
"It's okay. Let's go try to clean up." Lulu helped Yuna to her feet and the two girls walked over to the water. Yuna bent down and scooped her hands full of water to splash on her face.
"Lulu, I don't want them to see me like this. Can we stay out here for a while?"
Lulu nodded. "Let's take a walk."
Yuna was asleep for probably close to two hours, and now it was late afternoon. They walked though the quiet forest paths, not saying much. Yuna was glad to be alive. Birds chirped high among the tree tops, and butterflies weaved in and out of the branches. Yuna looked at the beautiful forest around her, the cascading waterfalls, and she remembered Tidus… she was happy. For the first time, she was able to think about her lost love without crying. A smile came to her face.
Lulu stopped walking. "Yuna?" Yuna turned to her friend. "Yuna, was it worth it?"
Yuna stopped to reflect. "I can still remember his deep blue eyes… and the way he held my face when he kissed me… and his hair; it was gold like the sun… and even though I feel like my heart has been ripped in two…" a single tear rolled down her cheek, "I wouldn't trade a second of the time I spent with him."
"Oh Yuna, I didn't want to make you cry. You looked so happy."
Yuna smiled. "I am happy. I just miss him… that's all. You know, Lulu. Like Chappu."
Lulu's dark eyes filled with sadness at the sound of his name. Not necessarily because she missed him, but because his death meant her eternal unhappiness. Yuna knew something was bothering her, but Lulu never talked about her own feelings. Lulu always seemed sad. She always carried an unspoken sorrow with her. "I'm sorry. I know you don't like to talk about that."
Lulu shook her head. 'I want to tell her.' Lulu thought. 'I have to tell this to someone.' "No… It's not quite like that. Chappu and I never had love like that." Yuna looked at her with astonishment. Lulu never spoke of her feelings for Chappu. She continued to reveal her deepest secret. "Chappu always said that I looked grumpy… I wasn't grumpy, I was sad… I am sad." Lulu burst into tears, rivers pouring from her brown eyes. Yuna had never seen Lulu cry before. No one had ever seen Lulu cry before. Lulu was always the one who had it all together. The one who Wakka talked to for hours, and the one who Rikku wanted to be like when she grew up. Lulu was the one who Yuna cried to, but now Lulu couldn't hold it in anymore. "Yuna…"
Yuna took her friend in her arms. "Lulu, tell me what's wrong."
"The minute I saw him, I knew that I loved him. But he was Chappu's brother, so I could never… he would never… I was going to tell Chappu, and then he… Now we can never be together."
Yuna didn't know what to say. They had always been such good friends. Finally, the source of Lulu's unhappiness was revealed. "Lulu, I never knew."
"No one knows, Yuna, you can't tell anyone."
"I promise."
The girls had been missing for hours now. Wakka had gone to look for them, and saw them on the path up ahead. When he got closer, he saw that Lulu was crying. He ducked behind a bush so he wouldn't be seen. Wakka stared in disbelief. He was worried. He knew she didn't get emotional over nothing. She must really be hurting.
"Hey! Whatcha lookin' at?" Rikku ran up behind him.
"Shhh! Be quiet!" Wakka ordered, and pulled Rikku behind the bush without taking his eyes off Lulu. Rikku parted the branches to see what was going on. "Oh, no. She's sad." Both of them watched with concern as Lulu wept in Yuna's arms.
"I wonder what they're saying." Wakka wondered out loud. "Let's go, ya? Before they see us."
Wakka and Rikku hurried back to town before the girls could find them hiding in the bushes. Wakka hurt inside for her. 'Don't cry, Lu. I hate to see you sad.'
Lulu dried her wet cheeks, as Yuna watched with concern. "Lulu, please promise me something… I won't tell anyone… But you have to tell Wakka."
Lulu shook her head. "I can't… he would never betray Chappu."
"Chappu would understand. He would want you both to be happy." Yuna took Lulu's hands and begged her. "Please Lulu, do it for me… I took for granted the time I had with Tidus, and now I'll never see him again… Promise me that you'll try." Lulu didn't answer. "Please Lulu?"
"I'll try." Lulu wasn't sure if she meant it. She wasn't sure that Chappu would understand. Even if Chappu did understand, she and Wakka were just friends. Wakka had never implied anything differently.
As the two girls returned to the village, Wakka watched Lulu in the corner of his eye. She was smiling, but her eyes were red and swollen. He wanted so much to run up and hug her; to kiss her and tell her that it would all be okay. But out of respect for his brother, he didn't.
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More on the way...
Darcee :)