I wrote this on 4/1/02 while I was in a silly mood. I hope you enjoy the
story, but I warn you it's quite strange. I don't own the characters and am
making no profit from this at all.
Well, My Day was Interesting, How About Yours?
Okay, before we get started on this story, there are a few minor details you should be aware of that have changed slightly. Some could consider them very insignificant, but I feel I must clear them up before we begin. Ready? Janeway happened to find a race called the Oni. They are genetically engineered humans, but are more powerful. The Oni can create strong forcefields called AT fields, and nothing can go through them. The Oni can fly, use energy as weapons, and have tremendous psychic powers. But that's not relevant right now. A few Oni that live on board Voyager are Shahara, Catmara, Wing, Saki, and Risaki. Oh, by the way, another Oni of importance is Mika, and Mika seems to want to kill Shahara. I'm not quite sure why. Now, a couple of more minor changes. Janeway and Chakotay have married (I can hear the J/C's cheering from here) and have two children. One is half Oni, but that's another matter entirely. Remind me to tell you later about that. Harry is married to Shahara (again, I hear cheers. How great for Harry!) and they are about to have a child. Hmm, anything else? Oh yes, there is a female Ensign on Alpha Shift who almost caused a warp core breach not too long ago. But now I'm moving too far off track. One last point: Enjoy the story. I hope you have as much fun reading it as I've had writing it. The Voyager's flight was running smoothly, and Janeway was in an unusually good mood. She was humming a cheerful tune while she walked around the bridge. The female Ensign looked a little gloomy. "Why the long face?" She smiled and asked. "My sister's baby didn't make it." "I'm so sorry. I'll give you time off if you need it." Janeway was aware of how traumatic that type of situation could be. She frowned. The Ensign shook her head. "I'm alright." "You know where I am if you need to talk." Janeway said sympathetically. She continued walking around the bridge. Chakotay, Harry, and Tuvok pulled out phasers and turned on the crew. They shot Janeway, Tom, and the Ensign. They three men turned to Shahara. "Do you have a problem with us taking over this ship?" Chakotay asked. Shahara was speechless. She just stared at them in disbelief. Harry put his phaser to her jaw. "You would kill your wife and baby?" She asked. "I'm taking that as a yes, you do have a problem." He said, and shot her. Shahara fell to the ground, but got right back up. Because of her engineered genes, she was immune to the blast. Tuvok put a forcefield around the Oni. She couldn't break through it, and Tuvok gave an evil grin. "Engage." Chakotay said, and Harry made the ship jump to Warp 13. Their plan was working perfectly, and they were almost home. The ship suddenly reversed course and increased speed until they were back where they had started. Chakotay was furious, and turned to Shahara. "What the hell was that?" "I don't know." She replied casually. Chakotay was certain she was lying. "I don't believe you." "Look then." She pointed to Mika, who was standing near her. Mika smirked. "Why'd you do that? You should be happy that we're leaving." Chakotay was fully confused. "Then I'd have no one to torture." She replied in an evil tone. "So true." Chakotay answered back and chuckled. He kicked Janeway in the face. She was already laying on the floor unconscious, and the sudden jumps in warp had already injured her. So what Chakotay did only made matters worse. He paused to think for a minute. "Why don't you join us?" Here, I need to interrupt. You, the audience, need to fully understand what the implications of this last statement our wonderful Commander just said. The audacity of it alone is almost beyond believable. Here we have Mika, who has repeatedly tried to kill Shahara and the Voyager crew. To ask her to join Chakotay's obviously mutinous actions is nothing short of insane. But obviously the Commander is not himself. We should continue now that you understand just how nuts he must be. "No." Harry shrugged. "Your loss." "I thought you'd like to help us inflict terror on billions of people. So if you're not going to help, get off my ship." Chakotay looked at Mika. "It's not your ship." She replied. "It is now. The Captain seems to be a little under the weather." With this Chakotay drove his elbow into the Captain's-his wife's, no less- forehead. She began to bleed. Chakotay took much pleasure from this. Tuvok laughed histerically at this. Chakotay got annoyed with the Vulcan's laugh, which sounded like fingernails being dragged across a chalkboard. "Shut up. First order of business is to get to Earth and help out the Borg. There's a few billion people that they'd love to assimilate." Chakotay sat in the Captain's chair, kicking Janeway like a rag doll farther away. "What's wrong with you?" Shahara shouted. "Nothing, m'dear. Now kindly shut the hell up." Harry said. Mika smirked. "Maybe they're learning from you, Shahara." Tuvok engaged the Warp Core again, and this time they got up to Warp 13.3. Mika hurled the ship back again, and Tom hit the front of the room. "Stop that!" Chakotay bellowed. "I told you no." Mika was acting so paradoxically, thought Chakotay. "Argh. I've had enough of you." Tuvok whined in a girly voice, and beamed Mika into space using a wide field, which would make her molecules scatter across a square kilometer of space. Mika just returned to the ship whole. "Do it again. Do it again." She said in a child-like voice. Now, I don't know about you, but if I were Chakotay, I'd be thoroughly pissed off right now. Maybe that's what led him to do what he did next, the absolutely unthinkable. Never the less, he said the unimaginable. "Q!" He screamed. A flash of white light, and the omnipotent Q appeared on the bridge. "You rang?" He inquired, leaning back in the commander's seat. "Yes, I have two wonderful women just dying to be your mates." He pointed toward Janeway and Shahara. "Just get this pest off my bridge." He motioned to Mika. "Oh, how wonderful! I knew you'd come to your senses." He grinned. Shahara gave him a gesture I'd prefer not to discuss in this story. Never the less, it gave Q the impression he wasn't well liked by her. "Goodbye." He snapped, and Mika disappeared. She was learning what a paramecium did all day. He snapped again, and Shahara appeared next to him. Janeway was awake and laying by his feet. "Now, that's really not becoming of a Q." He smiled and made her stand, and he also fixed the Captain's wounds. "Stop them, Harry." Shahara said. "Stop them yourself." He spat. "Sorry, she can't. I've decided she can't do that any more." Q replied, and put his two women in some nice blue robes. "This is insane! Stop this now!" Janeway screamed at the top of her lungs. All the unconscious officers stood, and Belanna and Seven stepped off of the turbolift. Every single person started to laugh, except for Tuvok, of course. Janeway had no idea what was happening, and really wasn't in a laughing mood. She had been awake the whole time Chakotay had stunned her, waiting for a good opportunity to take back control. She was unable to comprehend what was happening. They all doubled over in laughter, and a small giggle even escaped Seven's lips. "Happy April Fools Day, Captain!" They all yelled in unison. "I'll get you all back for this, just wait. Especially you, Commander." She put emphasis on the word Commander.
Well, My Day was Interesting, How About Yours?
Okay, before we get started on this story, there are a few minor details you should be aware of that have changed slightly. Some could consider them very insignificant, but I feel I must clear them up before we begin. Ready? Janeway happened to find a race called the Oni. They are genetically engineered humans, but are more powerful. The Oni can create strong forcefields called AT fields, and nothing can go through them. The Oni can fly, use energy as weapons, and have tremendous psychic powers. But that's not relevant right now. A few Oni that live on board Voyager are Shahara, Catmara, Wing, Saki, and Risaki. Oh, by the way, another Oni of importance is Mika, and Mika seems to want to kill Shahara. I'm not quite sure why. Now, a couple of more minor changes. Janeway and Chakotay have married (I can hear the J/C's cheering from here) and have two children. One is half Oni, but that's another matter entirely. Remind me to tell you later about that. Harry is married to Shahara (again, I hear cheers. How great for Harry!) and they are about to have a child. Hmm, anything else? Oh yes, there is a female Ensign on Alpha Shift who almost caused a warp core breach not too long ago. But now I'm moving too far off track. One last point: Enjoy the story. I hope you have as much fun reading it as I've had writing it. The Voyager's flight was running smoothly, and Janeway was in an unusually good mood. She was humming a cheerful tune while she walked around the bridge. The female Ensign looked a little gloomy. "Why the long face?" She smiled and asked. "My sister's baby didn't make it." "I'm so sorry. I'll give you time off if you need it." Janeway was aware of how traumatic that type of situation could be. She frowned. The Ensign shook her head. "I'm alright." "You know where I am if you need to talk." Janeway said sympathetically. She continued walking around the bridge. Chakotay, Harry, and Tuvok pulled out phasers and turned on the crew. They shot Janeway, Tom, and the Ensign. They three men turned to Shahara. "Do you have a problem with us taking over this ship?" Chakotay asked. Shahara was speechless. She just stared at them in disbelief. Harry put his phaser to her jaw. "You would kill your wife and baby?" She asked. "I'm taking that as a yes, you do have a problem." He said, and shot her. Shahara fell to the ground, but got right back up. Because of her engineered genes, she was immune to the blast. Tuvok put a forcefield around the Oni. She couldn't break through it, and Tuvok gave an evil grin. "Engage." Chakotay said, and Harry made the ship jump to Warp 13. Their plan was working perfectly, and they were almost home. The ship suddenly reversed course and increased speed until they were back where they had started. Chakotay was furious, and turned to Shahara. "What the hell was that?" "I don't know." She replied casually. Chakotay was certain she was lying. "I don't believe you." "Look then." She pointed to Mika, who was standing near her. Mika smirked. "Why'd you do that? You should be happy that we're leaving." Chakotay was fully confused. "Then I'd have no one to torture." She replied in an evil tone. "So true." Chakotay answered back and chuckled. He kicked Janeway in the face. She was already laying on the floor unconscious, and the sudden jumps in warp had already injured her. So what Chakotay did only made matters worse. He paused to think for a minute. "Why don't you join us?" Here, I need to interrupt. You, the audience, need to fully understand what the implications of this last statement our wonderful Commander just said. The audacity of it alone is almost beyond believable. Here we have Mika, who has repeatedly tried to kill Shahara and the Voyager crew. To ask her to join Chakotay's obviously mutinous actions is nothing short of insane. But obviously the Commander is not himself. We should continue now that you understand just how nuts he must be. "No." Harry shrugged. "Your loss." "I thought you'd like to help us inflict terror on billions of people. So if you're not going to help, get off my ship." Chakotay looked at Mika. "It's not your ship." She replied. "It is now. The Captain seems to be a little under the weather." With this Chakotay drove his elbow into the Captain's-his wife's, no less- forehead. She began to bleed. Chakotay took much pleasure from this. Tuvok laughed histerically at this. Chakotay got annoyed with the Vulcan's laugh, which sounded like fingernails being dragged across a chalkboard. "Shut up. First order of business is to get to Earth and help out the Borg. There's a few billion people that they'd love to assimilate." Chakotay sat in the Captain's chair, kicking Janeway like a rag doll farther away. "What's wrong with you?" Shahara shouted. "Nothing, m'dear. Now kindly shut the hell up." Harry said. Mika smirked. "Maybe they're learning from you, Shahara." Tuvok engaged the Warp Core again, and this time they got up to Warp 13.3. Mika hurled the ship back again, and Tom hit the front of the room. "Stop that!" Chakotay bellowed. "I told you no." Mika was acting so paradoxically, thought Chakotay. "Argh. I've had enough of you." Tuvok whined in a girly voice, and beamed Mika into space using a wide field, which would make her molecules scatter across a square kilometer of space. Mika just returned to the ship whole. "Do it again. Do it again." She said in a child-like voice. Now, I don't know about you, but if I were Chakotay, I'd be thoroughly pissed off right now. Maybe that's what led him to do what he did next, the absolutely unthinkable. Never the less, he said the unimaginable. "Q!" He screamed. A flash of white light, and the omnipotent Q appeared on the bridge. "You rang?" He inquired, leaning back in the commander's seat. "Yes, I have two wonderful women just dying to be your mates." He pointed toward Janeway and Shahara. "Just get this pest off my bridge." He motioned to Mika. "Oh, how wonderful! I knew you'd come to your senses." He grinned. Shahara gave him a gesture I'd prefer not to discuss in this story. Never the less, it gave Q the impression he wasn't well liked by her. "Goodbye." He snapped, and Mika disappeared. She was learning what a paramecium did all day. He snapped again, and Shahara appeared next to him. Janeway was awake and laying by his feet. "Now, that's really not becoming of a Q." He smiled and made her stand, and he also fixed the Captain's wounds. "Stop them, Harry." Shahara said. "Stop them yourself." He spat. "Sorry, she can't. I've decided she can't do that any more." Q replied, and put his two women in some nice blue robes. "This is insane! Stop this now!" Janeway screamed at the top of her lungs. All the unconscious officers stood, and Belanna and Seven stepped off of the turbolift. Every single person started to laugh, except for Tuvok, of course. Janeway had no idea what was happening, and really wasn't in a laughing mood. She had been awake the whole time Chakotay had stunned her, waiting for a good opportunity to take back control. She was unable to comprehend what was happening. They all doubled over in laughter, and a small giggle even escaped Seven's lips. "Happy April Fools Day, Captain!" They all yelled in unison. "I'll get you all back for this, just wait. Especially you, Commander." She put emphasis on the word Commander.