Disclaimer: I own nothing. All characters belong to Grant Naylor.

Warnings: this is slash. If you don't like this, hit the back button please.

Dedicated to Tronny, who hit my flamers with her stick, and to Lauren Greenleaf for writing Floor 13.



Rimmer, the 'new' one, was worried. After the initial honeymoon period, things between him and his alter ego had not been going well at all. Tension had been building throughout the ship, and it was beginning to seem that one of them would have to go. And, he reflected, he knew which one it would be. Him. Of course it would be him. He was the new boy, the one who had upset the balance. And he was scared. He didn't want to be annihilated, didn't want to just become nothingness once again. Desperate measures were required. He has to become essential to the other Rimmer, had to offer him something which made him irreplaceable, indispensable. Suddenly, he had it. A slight smile spread across his face. Yes, it was weasely and degrading, but what the smeg? It was better than the alternative. Tonight, he would put his plan into action…



Later that night, in the room that the Rimmers shared, he was bent forward over the bottom bunk. No, he wasn't enjoying this, but it was worth it. Honour, is his experience, wasn't always a survival trait- those who survived where the ones who adapted to situations and did what was necessary. He thought of earlier that night, and how smoothly his plan had gone…

The other Rimmer had come back from categorising the cargo in the hold, exhausted and snappish. Seizing his opportunity, he moved into full-on seductive mode. "Oh, come over here, I'll rub your back for you.", "Is there any way I can help you relax?" and so on. And it worked. Magnificently. It had been so long since the other Rimmer had got laid, with no women on the ship, that he really had found a service he could provide that no one else would, or even could, as they were both holograms. And so, he had been more than willing to take him up on his offer, with tiredness lowering his defences and the lack of physical contact for so long adding to his weakness. He gave in, using the 'new' Rimmer, exactly as he offered himself.

Later, as they lay in bed, the new Rimmer smiled to himself, sure that he was safe now. As long as he kept on providing sexual services, then there was no way he would be switched off. Full of self-satisfaction and confidence, he rolled over and went to sleep, with no concern for the cheapness and cynicism of his actions.