Miss (Mr.) Congeniality
Authors: Wolfiegrl and Lily_Potter
Disclaimer: We don't own…don't sue…but we wouldn't mind if JKR shared James with us. ;)
After though to the disclaimer: Or Sirius, or Remus, We aren't that picky….
Note from Wolfie Grl: Ok , everyone has probably noticed the lack of anything resembling an update, but I have been oh- so busy and I haven't had any spare time. On top of that, I've been sick six times in the last three months, and had been suffering through one hell of a case of writers block.
There is a remedy though, try getting your heart broken, works like a charm.
Dedication: to certain people, who will never know who they are, and who, hopefully, aren't reading this.
And to Lily, cause she didn't yell at me for not writing, and was very supportive when I whinged during my lunchtime emailing sessions.
Feedback: take away my pain, post a review. Keep the world clean, eat a pigeon. J
Chapter 5
It had been sixteen excruciatingly painful hours (for all the Marauders) since their last run in with professor McGonagall. And now, it being rather late in the evening, the situation had not improved.
James was worried, he sat smack-bang in the middle of the common room and snapped at anyone who came within yelling distance. So far, three rather bubbly admiring first year Gryffindor girls had been given detention by the sixteen year old prefect. The power to give detentions was limited to his own house, but had finally came useful to James.
The girls had run crying to Lily, who had immediately revoked the detentions, but with a price, for the rest of the evening, they were to follow James around and giggle at every and any sight of him.
Remus was leafing through Witch Weekly's sessional catalogues, and was calling out formal-dress suggestions to Sirius, who, for revenge, had given up on silencing charms, and now was writing a rather racy poem to Professor McGonagall – from Remus, offcourse.
From his (Sirius') corner of the common room, mumblings such as "skin as soft as the summer breeze" and " I'd show you exactly what you could do with a feather" and finally "hands on" "pressed against" "lips against your …" could be heard. And in several fits of creative momentum, other more meaningful verbs were also cried out, enough so, to make several seventh years cringe and blush, and the HeadGirl to finally order anyone under fifteen out of the room.
Lily, on the other hand, was contend with her day, and had curled up in an armchair and went promptly to sleep, her books and last minute homework scattered around her.
Many minutes later, filled with strangled moments of laughter, and Lily's gentle breathing, James, in some part of his mind registered the ludicrousness of this whole situation and decided to go and find Snape and finally resolve everything.
Beyond rage, he didn't bother with the usual necessities such as the cloak, or the map, and instead, just walked out of the common room.
Remus, oblivious to who exactly Sirius was writing the letter to, decided that James could take care of himself, and went upstairs and straight to bed.
And Sirius - he finally signed the letter with a flourish, performed a quick copying charm, and then with one copy of the letter held carefully in his hands, went in search of an owl.
* * *
James, on the other hand, was not having such a peaceful evening. After leaving the common room, he had been intercepted by the giggling girl trio. The three girls, after getting kicked out of the common room, ( due to necessary Sirius-proof censorship, and were unable to return to the common room due to the run away portrait of the Pink Lady being far away,) had waited for him outside.
He did not find Snape, instead, he got caught by Filch because of the three giggling girls that had (on Lily's orders) continued to follow him.
On top of that, he was taken straight to the Headmasters' office where Filch accused him of "tricking these girls into sneaking outside so he could take advantage of their innocence."
Despite Filch so called psychological evidence, and James' record (and his tendency to get caught while making out with some girl), Dumbledore dismissed the entire claim immediately, that is - after a heartily explanation from the girl's, and one amused look at James' shocked and disgusted face.
For the billionth time, James made the trek from Dumbledore's office to the common room. And again, he was fuming.
Aware of the three girls who walked (subdued) behind him, he made every cell in his body reflective his rage.
They had, rather hurriedly, explained to him that it was all a joke, and had accidentally, let Lily's name slip.
In James' mind a plan was forming on its own accord. Yelling at her would not be enough. No, he needed oh-so-sweet revenge. Embarrassment, it was always the key.
The though that he would ever even think of such a disgusting idea made his skin crawl. His face flushed, somewhere between hurt (why would anyone think I could do such a thing?), embarrassment (I. Professor. no! I..), and anger (How dare they accuse me?).
No. No. Lily was going to pay. He just needed an idea.
As he went past the main entrance, James glanced at the notice board floating in the air. The sight of the pink pageant flayer caught his eyes.
He smiled.
Revenge would be sweet.
* * *
Lily had awoken to find an angry face looking down at her. She cried out and instantly shrank back into the armchair.
The person leaned down closer, placed both his hands by her sides, and was completely towering over her.
He, for it was a he, blocked almost all sources of light, and it was the sight of his messy, spiky hair, illuminated by the firelight, that had finally given him away.
"James… what are you doing?" Lily managed to ask. From her position, he seemed so tall, and huge, and angry.
He smirked. From his right pocked he produced a pair of white panties.
"Yours, I presume?" he asked.
Lily stared up at him, green eyes huge in shock. What was he? Her underwear? How dare he? But, it was James - never, he would never? Oh God.
"James!" She yelled, and snatched the offending garment from his hand.
"Guess what Lily? You like games. Like little funny games where you make girls follow people around. Like to see those people accused of things they would NEVER do? Huh? You like to see people get ridiculed? Think this stupid pageant wasn't enough for me? You wanted to do more?"
His voice was dangerously low, and deliberately slow. His breathing was even, and she could feel his breath brush against her forehead.
"Think I haven't been through enough lately? Wanted a couple of laughs? Well, why not? Doesn't everyone? How about we change the pace though? Ok, here is the plan Lily. You are going to be entering this pageant right next to Sirius and me. And you know what else,"
Slowly, he paused, picking her undies from her hand and dangled them in her face. His strange grin spread even further, " and baby, if you don't, a pair of those will be awarded to the highest bidder, and another pair, enlarged and risen on the main entrance flag pole."
He then, suddenly, moved away from her and with loud footsteps, walked up to his dorm room.
Lily stood still, frozen.
James and her got along fairly well. Why would he want to do something like that? Why would he want to hurt her so much? What did he mean by "games"?
Slowly, tears willed up in her eyes. And staring into the firelight, she sat in her armchair, crying.
And when morning came, nothing would ever be the same.
TBC
Wolife apologises for the desturbingess.. For the bad bad writingess. Wolfe girl is just very very upset lately, and very very sad.
Sorry. Very very sorry.