1.1 ATTENTION: As of 3/22/02, scene three is altered a wee bit- what she
thinks while looking at herself in the mirror, I'll make reference to it
later, so you might want to check it out!
1.2
1.3
Disclaimer: I don't own ALIAS, but I sure wish I did!!!
[Thoughts are in brackets]
…"Vaughn! What are you doing here!?!"
Scene 4
She quickly recovered from her shock and noticed that he sat with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands, slumped so far down that she thought she could actually see the 'world' weighing down shoulders. Thinking he might be ill, or have some horrific news, she knelt down and put a hand on his shoulder, "Vaughn are you okay!?"
He had been so deep in thought that he hadn't noticed her presence until she was eye level with him. He slowly lifted his head; when he saw with his own eyes that she was actually alive, all other thoughts cleared, a relieved smile filled his exhausted face, and he reached out to embrace her. The jolt of the plane starting to move broke their 'emotional attachment'.
They chuckled as Sydney moved to the seat facing him and buckled in, "So did you meet Captain Cowboy Carver!?"
"Yeah," he replied, while watching her toy with the gadgets of the very plush private plane.
[Will she tell me? Do I want her to? Is she as angry as I am? Does she want revenge?] He closed his eyes ashamed to look at her, afraid of the intensity of his own feelings of rage, not wanting her to think he was upset with her.
[AM I upset with her? DO I blame her? After all you only have one mom, even if she IS a psychotic murderer! What if she wants to save her, protect her? I don't know if I'm ready for this. I don't know if I can be the listener that she needs me to be. I want to be there for her, that's what I'm paid for right? RIGHT, like the taxpayers pay me to meet her at a pier while she drowns her pager, they certainly didn't pitch in for that expensive antique frame! I definitely don't get paid enough to willingly enter buildings filled with armed terrorists and C-4 explosives! (mental sigh)
Don't jump to conclusions Mike, you don't even know what she's thinking… whatever it is, she looks great doing it. (inward chuckle) I don't want to ruin our friendship over this. She trusts me, with her LIFE! Maybe that's why I'm so drawn to her, she needs me, like no one ever has; it's a powerful feeling to be the only one she can really turn to! I AM too emotionally involved, but I did this to myself! Man, 'ole Will couldn't have written a more pathetic story! Dad, can you hear me? What do I do? I wish stuff like this was in the handbook! I wish I could talk to her about it. But would it mess everything up? Would I loose her trust in me? I'll do it, but not tonight, later…]
As the plane began to speed up and take off Sydney was forced to sit back and look at her 'angel'. He had closed his eyes, so she was able to look her fill.
[(mental sigh) He looks heavenly even when he looks like crap!] She took note of his crumpled clothing and the puffiness around his eyes that said he'd either been crying a whole lot or had been cutting a bushel of onions! She watched as a million emotions flashed across his face [hmm, I'd give a BILLION pennies for his thoughts! (inward chuckle)] Just as soon as the thought came it was replaced by the image of what happened to the last guy she gave her all for, how ironic that in the end it was he who paid too high a price. She closed her eyes in pain.
[I can't fall for him, I can't do that to him. I can't do that to ME! I don't think I can stand loosing someone else I love. Oh, who am I kidding, I do love him. If not romantically, at least for everything he does for me, even if he is paid to do it! RIGHT, like they give him overtime to give me Christmas gifts, or to go against orders risking his life to save me from people like Cole, or to hold me when I cry! They certainly don't pay him to tell me about his Aunt Trish, hmm, I wish he would tell me more about his family. Its strange though, even with everything we don't share, even though we've never even kissed, I have so much more with him than I ever had with Danny (pang of guilt). Don't go there Syd, too painful!
If I really loved him, if I really cared, I wouldn't be so selfish; I wouldn't have done everything in my power to see that he remained my handler. I'd let him leave this madness I call my life, let him go live a normal life with a normal girl, one who won't potentially destroy the world!!!
Maybe I don't love him; maybe I just need him too much to let him go. If I told him about mom being alive he might leave. Would he go? Would he stay, but change towards me? Would I loose him, even as a friend? That's the one thing I don't think I could live without, he's like my journal, he knows my worst and best, and yet is always there for more! I wish I could do the same for him, maybe my greatest gift, the only way I could repay him is to let him go. I should tell him, I have to tell him, but not tonight, later…]
With eyes closed they both fell asleep to their rambling thoughts, and the hum of the plane soaring through the sky.
TBC
1.2
1.3
Disclaimer: I don't own ALIAS, but I sure wish I did!!!
[Thoughts are in brackets]
…"Vaughn! What are you doing here!?!"
Scene 4
She quickly recovered from her shock and noticed that he sat with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands, slumped so far down that she thought she could actually see the 'world' weighing down shoulders. Thinking he might be ill, or have some horrific news, she knelt down and put a hand on his shoulder, "Vaughn are you okay!?"
He had been so deep in thought that he hadn't noticed her presence until she was eye level with him. He slowly lifted his head; when he saw with his own eyes that she was actually alive, all other thoughts cleared, a relieved smile filled his exhausted face, and he reached out to embrace her. The jolt of the plane starting to move broke their 'emotional attachment'.
They chuckled as Sydney moved to the seat facing him and buckled in, "So did you meet Captain Cowboy Carver!?"
"Yeah," he replied, while watching her toy with the gadgets of the very plush private plane.
[Will she tell me? Do I want her to? Is she as angry as I am? Does she want revenge?] He closed his eyes ashamed to look at her, afraid of the intensity of his own feelings of rage, not wanting her to think he was upset with her.
[AM I upset with her? DO I blame her? After all you only have one mom, even if she IS a psychotic murderer! What if she wants to save her, protect her? I don't know if I'm ready for this. I don't know if I can be the listener that she needs me to be. I want to be there for her, that's what I'm paid for right? RIGHT, like the taxpayers pay me to meet her at a pier while she drowns her pager, they certainly didn't pitch in for that expensive antique frame! I definitely don't get paid enough to willingly enter buildings filled with armed terrorists and C-4 explosives! (mental sigh)
Don't jump to conclusions Mike, you don't even know what she's thinking… whatever it is, she looks great doing it. (inward chuckle) I don't want to ruin our friendship over this. She trusts me, with her LIFE! Maybe that's why I'm so drawn to her, she needs me, like no one ever has; it's a powerful feeling to be the only one she can really turn to! I AM too emotionally involved, but I did this to myself! Man, 'ole Will couldn't have written a more pathetic story! Dad, can you hear me? What do I do? I wish stuff like this was in the handbook! I wish I could talk to her about it. But would it mess everything up? Would I loose her trust in me? I'll do it, but not tonight, later…]
As the plane began to speed up and take off Sydney was forced to sit back and look at her 'angel'. He had closed his eyes, so she was able to look her fill.
[(mental sigh) He looks heavenly even when he looks like crap!] She took note of his crumpled clothing and the puffiness around his eyes that said he'd either been crying a whole lot or had been cutting a bushel of onions! She watched as a million emotions flashed across his face [hmm, I'd give a BILLION pennies for his thoughts! (inward chuckle)] Just as soon as the thought came it was replaced by the image of what happened to the last guy she gave her all for, how ironic that in the end it was he who paid too high a price. She closed her eyes in pain.
[I can't fall for him, I can't do that to him. I can't do that to ME! I don't think I can stand loosing someone else I love. Oh, who am I kidding, I do love him. If not romantically, at least for everything he does for me, even if he is paid to do it! RIGHT, like they give him overtime to give me Christmas gifts, or to go against orders risking his life to save me from people like Cole, or to hold me when I cry! They certainly don't pay him to tell me about his Aunt Trish, hmm, I wish he would tell me more about his family. Its strange though, even with everything we don't share, even though we've never even kissed, I have so much more with him than I ever had with Danny (pang of guilt). Don't go there Syd, too painful!
If I really loved him, if I really cared, I wouldn't be so selfish; I wouldn't have done everything in my power to see that he remained my handler. I'd let him leave this madness I call my life, let him go live a normal life with a normal girl, one who won't potentially destroy the world!!!
Maybe I don't love him; maybe I just need him too much to let him go. If I told him about mom being alive he might leave. Would he go? Would he stay, but change towards me? Would I loose him, even as a friend? That's the one thing I don't think I could live without, he's like my journal, he knows my worst and best, and yet is always there for more! I wish I could do the same for him, maybe my greatest gift, the only way I could repay him is to let him go. I should tell him, I have to tell him, but not tonight, later…]
With eyes closed they both fell asleep to their rambling thoughts, and the hum of the plane soaring through the sky.
TBC