Warfare of the mind and heart: chapter two of 'Ranma Boy'
By Kalio
Disclaimer: see first chap.
A/n: Wow... I know that I've gotten more reviews for other stories, but most of the reviews for this one were pretty powerful. I've never had someone threaten my life for more writing (for manga, by my bestfriend... now that's a different story...) *stares pointedly at reviewers*. Anyway, due to the frustration of reviewers and the unconscious desire on my part to write an angsty thing from Ranma's POV, I decided to, well, finish this right! Oh, and those of you who are waiting for 'Maybe that's the problem, then' 's third chapter, I'm sorry, but I'll get to that soon, I hope.
Warning: If you haven't read the last two books of the manga (the anime doesn't count since I don't know what happened there), I suggest you do so before you read this, unless someone has already spoiled the ending, cuz this is definitely going to ruin the ending. Don't say I didn't warn you. Oh, and I wish the ending hadn't been ruined for me, so take my advice and come back to read, K?
Still with me? Good.
***
'Dammit,' Ranma swore quietly as he packed. He did not want to go to China anymore. He had always dreamed of a cure for his curse, actively sought it, even went to great lengths to be rid of it, in fact. So why was he trying desperately to get out of the chance of a lifetime to cure it? Simple. One reason.
Akane. He would be breaking both of their hearts.
He wouldn't have believed it up until two minutes ago, but Akane did NOT want him to go. He heard her very clearly, even though she was sobbing. It was not something a man like him could miss. She said she loved him. The girl who called him baka, hentai, and dummy said she loved him, and it was not something a girl like her would say lightly. In fact, she had never even said she loved Dr. Tofu.
Ranma stopped his movements and stared past his pack into empty space, lala land. 'Dammit,' he said again. If he were only going for his own selfish reasons, he wouldn't go. Or he would take her with him... No, it would be dangerous if she accidentally fell in a pool.
But the trip was not for his own selfish reasons, and there was no way in hell that he would take her to such a place with such people around him. There was no way he could get out of going, either. His sense of duty would not allow the poor little girl, Plum, to face such things alone. Nor would the other cursed ones let him out of the trip. He was stuck between a rock and a hard place, to be cliche. It was not his decision to make, but he couldn't help feeling horrid for breaking her heart, or angry at the other's ambitions for shattering his.
***
(A/n: this whole fic will have scene changes till the end of the Manga, so bear with them... I told you you should have read it ^.~)
It wasn't enough that he was leaving in mere minutes, but he couldn't figure out why Akane wasn't there. He tried to act nonchalant, but acting casual when something was really making him churn, was not Ranma's strong suit. His life energy (ki) hummed with mixed emotions. Why isn't she here? Doesn't she care that I'm leaving? Doesn't she love me? Why can't she just wish me farewell? He couldn't decide whether to be angry, sad, or just plain upset.
After the boat sinking as a result (a/n: *snicker*) of his inner turmoil, and Akane showed up, he calmed down. She didn't want to see him leave because she had been afraid. It made sense, but it still hurt him deeply.
It had been the same when he had moved out briefly. His ego ran away with him, and when she had put on a brave face for him (i.e. said she thought he'd be happy going to live with his mother). He had taken it completely the wrong way, trying to neither admit the desire to stay, nor let himself believe that Akane would be happier without him in the house. The resulting fight was not a happy one, and the scars from that fight had never left his mind, taunting him for his foolishness.
The goodbye could not be described as tearful, nor could it be described as joyful. It was simple, in it's own right, but he had a sinking feeling like the goodbye would be final. With a heavy soul, he and the others pushed off, he watched her watching him until he no longer could, and sighed. Such love was painful.
***
Ranma couldn't believe it when he say Akane's still form in the middle of the road in China. It had been a major shock to his system. Shaken would be the best word to describe it, and possibly stirred, too. He was happy to see her, but not remotely happy that she was in China where all the freaky stuff was happening. Something had bothered him, though, she didn't seem herself.
When he was in the furo, of course, he found out why he had this stinking suspicion. It was not like Akane to be so open with her body. To him, or anybody. She was not the same girl who had been crying over his soon-to-be absence. No, she was someone else with the image of Akane. What was worse, she knew of his love for Akane, and was exploiting it.
All Ranma knew, was that Akane was somewhere in China, and needed his help. Oh God, did he need her help.
***
(a/n: you should really read the whole last book if you're gonna keep reading this fic...)
Dead.
That's how he felt inside and that's what she was. As he stared up at the Chinese outfit the Akane had been wearing before she was vaporized, Ranma couldn't process the thought. Her clothing floated down to him and he held and stared at it. Gone. No longer with him. It just wasn't right.
Ryoga was dragging him away as he held onto the outfit, not daring to move, not daring to breathe. Her last act of life had been to save him from being eaten alive by Saffron's egg, and now she was dead. Ryoga was shouting at him to move, but to Ranma, it no longer mattered. There was no point in life if the person you planned on spending it with, was not around to spend it.
***
It wasn't until the guide had showed him the mini-Akane doll, was Ranma really convinced that Akane could somehow be alive. That glimmer of hope brought him back to reality. He was slightly embarrassed for attacking the guide when he had taken her clothes away, but he couldn't help feeling the desperation and the anger for him taking away his last reminder of her.
There was one way to save her. And if there was one person to save her, it would be him.
***
He finally did it. He beat Saffron and got Akane the water from the Jusendo source. His girl self held her naked form as the fell from the sky, Ranma so happy that it wasn't too late, and that even though her eyes were closed, she was smiling. He grinned and said her name.
Seconds later, his face died again. She was not breathing. He was too late. Oh Kami-sama... he was too late.
***
Kettle by his side, he wrapped Akane in his shirt, trying to cover her still form. He held her on his lap, having a few minutes with her to himself as the others had somehow allowed. Cradling her in his arms, began to speak softly to her, trying desperately to release the words from his heart that he had never said, never told her, never thought he'd have to tell her.
Now that she... he could speak freely without fear of rejection or fear of the truth, so he tried to spit it out, how he had wanted to tell her he loved her.
***
A miracle beyond any miracle had happened. She had held on, she didn't die. Of course this lead to a few awkward moments ensuing, but Ranma was just happy she was alive. It was all the more the Kami would provide him with.
His curse wasn't curable due to an over abundance of water flooding the springs of drowned whatevers, but he tried not to stress. She didn't seem to mind his curse so much, so he didn't, either. He was just glad to be going home...TOGETHER.
***
The wedding attempt was a fiasco. Horribly planned, and it hadn't helped that Nabiki sent out invitations in bulk. And, of course, it didn't help that the bride and groom to-be would be the only couple, in the history of man, to argue over whether the 'I love you' was said out loud or not, and whether it even mattered. The whole thing was a sham, but it was a special sham.
'Maybe,' Ranma thought, 'Maybe one day, we can get married on our own terms. And maybe someday, I will tell her I love her out loud, and in my right mind. And maybe, just maybe, we can be happy.' Ranma sighed a contented sigh, staring out the window. The sigh of a man dream about kids and a dojo, and, most importantly, a loving wife to share it with...
*~The real Owari~*
A/n: Okay, what do you think? It's been awhile since I wrote the song fic part, and this is written much differently. It's not as sad, well, parts of it are, but most of it is not so bad. Did I do okay in satisfying all of you reviewers cravings for a sequel? Review please. Da button's right there!