Kell's Story

by Tallulah Grammar Songstress

Kell hates the GGs and resolves to destroy them...but they aren't the only problem in her life. Prequel to Down And Out. OCs, but the GGs are involved. Features sexual abuse.

3. Losses

Chapter 03 – Losses

(I don't own JSR, or associated gangs or place names – they're all © Sega. Nor do I own the names Giga or Data – they're all © NoiseTank13. And guess what? I don't own Garam either – he's © Sega. However, I do own everyone else in this chapter, I think. Thank you very much for r+ring the last 2 – please don't forget this one!)

The next day Akina and I walked to school together, just like old times. Sort of.

"Okay," I said as we neared the gates. "We just act completely, totally normal. Right?"

"Right," Akina said, and giggled.

I bit down the urge telling me to kiss that laughing mouth, and carried on walking. Once we got into the playground, I said, "Meet you at second break, okay? In the cloakrooms."

They were out of bounds during break. That should be perfect.

Once there we kissed surrounded by old raincoats and piles of trainers. I could hardly believe this was happening. I wanted to sing, wanted to laugh, wanted to stay just doing this forever…

"Alex? You in here?"

We leapt apart. That was San's voice.

"Who's there?"

I dropped to the ground and started peering under the coats. "It's no good, Akina, I can't see your trainers anywhere."

"Oh, it's you," San said as she came into view. "Do you know where Alex is?"

"I don't know and I don't care," I snapped.

"Sorreee. Just thought I'd ask." She walked on and out of the cloakroom.

"That was close," Akina said. "We've got to be careful."

Over the next few days we met up wherever we could. But we could never be together for long. Someone always came along and interrupted us.

Overall, however, things seemed to be going okay. Shiro was working late at the moment, so he couldn't come near me, Akina liked me in that way, and the Sable Blades were actually being nice to me.

We had a few run-ins with the Noise Tanks, but nothing serious.

Until a week after the first battle.

We were in the square again, giving it a makeover, when they arrived.

Three of them. They stood tall and angry against the neon lights.

"Well, well, well," Chiyo called over to them. "It's the pocket calculator squad. What do you want?"

"Either you get out of Benten-cho," Data said, "or we kill you."

We all rolled our eyes. I could feel excitement rising inside me. This was gonna be fun.

"Kill us?" Chiyo laughed. "Really. Sorry, but we're not leaving just because of the threats of the official nerd brigade. By the way, where's your other member? Haven't seen him all week."

Angry silence from the other gang. Chiyo smirked at me. "Looks like your little tap dancing routine on his head was better than we thought."

"Are you leaving?" Data called.

"Nope."

They rushed towards us.

Data was the one who attacked me. I only really registered a white blur, then a sickening pain on the head. I stumbled, and felt myself falling.

Data's skate caught me in the ribs. "Enjoying yourself now?" she shouted. "This is what you did to Giga, isn't it? Fun, right? A real bundle of laughs!"

She kicked out again and again. My thoughts were broken up by the pain. Desperately I tried to dodge her, but it was no good.

Suddenly someone else grabbed Data's arms and pulled her back. Jin.

"What's wrong?" I said. "What happened to him, anyway? Did I make him stupider than he already was?"

Data didn't answer. Jin shook her. "My friend asked you a question."

"Well, I'm not gonna answer her," Data gasped, struggling to get free. "She hurt him bad, but why should she need to know that?"

"Is he dead yet?" I said, wondering how badly I could make her crack. "His skull looked pretty thick. Or is he just comatose?"

Data managed to shake Jin off her, then punched me. I managed to keep upright this time. Jin caught Data's wrists again and twisted them, and then I hit the Noise Tank so hard my knuckles ached.

Suddenly my radio blared out practically the same message about gang violence in the square that we'd heard before. Jin let go of Data, and the Noise Tank hurried over to her friends. I looked round for mine. Ringo was grappling with Gamma, and Chiyo –

Omega had a sharp piece of metal that he was trying to stab Chiyo with. The Sable Blade was dodging nimbly, but I could see blood covering one hand.

I could hear sirens echoing in the streets around us.

Data, Gamma, Ringo and Jin started to scramble. Omega didn't.

He lunged out, and the metal sank deep into Chiyo's side.

I think I screamed. Omega laughed, and flung the bloodstained metal to land at my feet. "Sorry, blackie. We did warn you."

Then he raced away.

"Kellaani, move it!" Jin yelled.

"You go on!" I replied. Then I rushed over to Chiyo. She'd dropped to her knees, and I could see her black shirt becoming heavier and damper as the blood soaked through.

"Kellaani, you're…you're a fool…" she gasped. "Run."

"I can't just leave you."

"I'm…I'm going to die…I think…or failing that…have a nice long stretch in…in Sing Sing. No juvenile hall…'m too old…"

"Don't be dumb. I'll help you."

"No…it's all fate, you know…I meet you…I thought you were a wimp but you're not…you're as good as me…then this happens…it's time for me to retire…I got to tell you one thing…"

"What?"

"The thing is…" Chiyo said, speaking faster as the sirens got louder. "If you want…if you want to be successful then…then don't be nice. You're good…you're good at hurting people, I saw. Don't just…"

She took a deep, painful breath.

"Don't just hit out…don't use physical pain…that heals. Use…use mental pain…what they're scared of…what they hate…what burns their minds…listen, find out, you can learn that stuff when you keep your ears open…you did it to that Noise Tank bitch, right? Then strike. If you want to succeed…"

"Okay, Chiyo. I'll remember." I would have said that to anything at the time.

"Now go!"

I got to my feet, not knowing what to do.

"Is she okay?"

Gamma. He hadn't run. He'd been watching us.

"No, of course she fucking well isn't! Your buddy stabbed her!"

He stopped and ran back.

"Are you nuts?" I yelled.

"Go! I can't leave anyone like this…"

Gamma rushed back towards Chiyo. He dropped down next to her.

The police car tore into the square.

I turned and ran, dodging through people, jumped up the truck and into the billboard passage. From there I watched as two cops ran towards Chiyo. Picking her up, they shoved her into the car. Two others grabbed Gamma. He didn't struggle. They knocked him about anyway.

The car drove off, and the square was empty.

The Noise Tanks and Sable Blades were waiting on Main Street when I ran out of the passage.

"Where's Gamma?" Data demanded.

"Screw him, where's Chiyo?" Jin rushed over to me.

"Arrested. Both of them." I slumped down. I was feeling sick.

"What?" all the rudies yelled.

"Chiyo got stabbed, remember?" I said to Omega. "She told me to run. Then, for some unfathomable reason, Gamma decided to get all Sir Galahad and ran back to her. The cops grabbed them both."

"You're lying," Omega said. "No way would any of us try and help any of you."

"I can say exactly the same thing, but that's what happened. They're gone. Both of 'em."

"We'll get you for this," Omega said. "First Giga and now Gamma. We'll get you for this."

"I'm so scared," Jin snapped. "Just butt out and leave us alone."

The Noise Tanks skated away.

"I'd better go," I said. "I'm sorry –"

"Nah, it's okay. Thanks for trying to help Chiyo." Ringo sighed. "See you tomorrow."

"I can't believe it, though," Jin said. She was starting to cry. "Chiyo's never let them get her before…"

Ringo put his arm round her, and I left them.

I was just about to cross back into Kogane-cho when someone grabbed my arm and I shrieked.

"Shut up!"

It was Omega.

"Going to stab me in the night, are you?" I snapped.

"No. I just wanted to say thank you."

"For what?"

"For putting Giga out of action."

"Is he dead?"

"No. He's sitting back at our HQ bawling like a baby. Data will have to dump him soon, I'm betting. Then I'll be in with a chance. So thanks, Kellaani Sable Blade."

"You're scum," I said, and dashed away.

I was trembling when I reached home. I kept seeing Chiyo falling. And hearing the choking sound in her voice. And watching a crumpled, tiny dark figure being carried away by two cops.

That could have been me. If Data had gone for Chiyo, it was quite likely Omega would have attacked me. I could have been stabbed and left bleeding. I could have been driven away in a cop car. I could have been…

Whatever was happening to her now, I didn't think it could be good.

And Gamma had gone with her.

I wished I had. She'd told me she approved of me. I should have stayed with her and I hadn't.

I remembered what she'd stuttered out to me. Don't be nice. Find their weak points. It sounded cruel. And yet…it sounded sensible.

If I could only find Shiro's weak point…that would be fun.

And I couldn't deny that it was fun to make people furious and upset. Especially Data.

And Omega…well, he was even more of a rat than I'd thought. Don't go with him, Data, I said silently. Stick with Giga. At least he's trustworthy.

Traitors. Oh, please.

When I got back in the house was silent. My mum was asleep. I wondered if Shiro had been one of the ones called to Genkijomae.

He'd love it if he arrested me.

Well, I wasn't going to let that happen.

I undressed slowly. There was dried blood on my knuckles and on the knees of my clothes. Data's and Chiyo's.

Suddenly the phone rang. I jumped, then nervously answered it.

"Hello?"

"Laani, is that you?"

Akina.

"Yes. What's wrong?"

"Oh, god…Laani, I saw on the news…gang violence in Benten…I knew that's where you'd gone…"

"Why on earth were you listening to the news at that hour?"

"I was sticking with my parents. Are you sure you're all right?"

"I'm fine. I was involved but…I'm fine."

"Are the rest of your gang?"

I swallowed. "No. One got stabbed, and then arrested."

"I'm sorry." Akina sounded shaken. "Laani, why are you doing this? It's too dangerous."

"It's as risky as anything in life, it's healthy, and I get to find a way out of my current situation."

She sighed, and I felt even more guilty. "Akina, look. I know you worry, but I gotta do this, don't you see? I've told you, I promised you, I'll be careful. And I'll always be with you."

"I know. I'm sorry I keep getting at you, I just worry about you. You know that, right?"

"Course I do. And I appreciate it."

We chatted a little more, then she said, "I'd better go."

"Where are the brat pack?"

"Out partying. I wonder if they saw you?"

"Hopefully not. If I'd have seen them I'd have made sure they got caught up in the gang violence as well. Take care, okay?"

"Sure. Love you."

"Same here."

The phone clicked down, and the house grew silent again.

I turned off my bedroom light and crawled into bed. My feet were cold, and the mouldy river smell was seeping through the air.

It was a long time before I got to sleep.

The next day all hell broke loose.

It started off okay. Akina and I walked to school together like we'd always done. But I was finding it harder and harder to act like just a friend towards her. Wanting to touch, wanting to hold, wanting to…love, I guess, was burning inside me like I'd drunk fire. And I couldn't do anything. Not in public. Everyone knew I was protective of the girl, but there was a definite line which I couldn't afford to cross.

Akina scurried inside as soon as we got to school. I went over to Shar and Dash.

"Why're you hanging with Akina so much?" Shar asked.

"She's my friend, isn't she?"

"Yeah, but we hardly see you now."

"I'm sorry, guys." I meant it. If I lost them Alex would make mincemeat of me. "It's just…I really…uh…like hanging with Akina, and you know…"

If only she'd been a guy. Then they'd have understood perfectly. They did that sort of thing all the time.

"I guess so." Dash sighed. "But we're your friends too, right, Kellaani?"

"Course you are. Don't be daft."

We chatted a little more until we had to go in. I wondered how long I'd be able to keep this up. All the time I'd been making small talk I'd been wondering if I could have made a break for it and gone to find Akina in the classroom, even though I knew it was a stupid idea. It was a weird feeling, not being able to think rationally. I wasn't sure if I liked it.

I sat through the double maths lesson impatiently, glancing at the clock every few seconds. Akina was sitting over the other side of the room still, and I didn't dare look at her. I felt like everyone would be able to see my feelings in my eyes.

At last our teacher stopped talking, gave out the homework, and left. People immediately started to follow suit. I pretended to be extra slow at packing my bag.

"Laani?"

Akina was standing in the sunlight. It tipped her hair and skin with gold.

I literally ran over to her. I couldn't remember feeling this obsessed with anyone else, ever.

"I thought I'd go crazy, sitting there watching you," she said.

"You too?"

She laughed, and I kissed her. This felt right, this felt good. The heat inside spread through my bones.

A sharp crash made us spring apart.

San stood at the door, mouth gaping.

"I – I came back to get my maths book –" she stammered.

I quickly snatched my hands off Akina's waist. "Well, get it and go."

San went over to her desk and picked up the book. She was staring at us both like we'd each sprouted an extra head.

"Close your mouth, the flies'll get in," I said. "Oh, and keep it closed. I don't want my social life becoming classroom gossip."

San bolted from the room and slammed the door behind her.

"She won't keep quiet, will she?" Akina said.

I wanted to contradict that, but I knew she was right. "No."

"What are we going to do?"

"Deny everything?"

Akina shook her head. "I don't think that'll work. People will still believe."

"Don't worry," I said. "I'll look after you. I promise."

"Look after yourself more."

I hugged her, feeling how small she was, how fragile. She wouldn't last a day against Alex and Co.

"Come on," I said at last. "Let's go face the music."

We walked into Chemistry and the classroom went silent as everyone stared at us.

"Kellaani," Alex said. "How nice to see you!"

"I can't say the same." I could feel myself trembling. For the first time she'd got something she could really hurt me with.

"You should have told us," Alex purred. "We'd have got the church booked."

"Give it up, Alex. I'm not in the mood." I went over to a desk and slammed my bag down onto it.

"According to my sister, you sure were a minute ago. Begging for it." She turned to Akina, who went pale. "Did she have you down on your knees, honey? Licking away?"

Hot fury hit my stomach. "You shut up," I snapped. "You wouldn't be doing this if it was a guy San had seen me with. You shut up right now."

Alex widened her eyes. "I'm sorry, Kellaani. I just don't want you corrupting Akina's innocence, okay? I mean, screwing in an empty classroom, shame on you."

Akina had let her head drop now. I could see tears shining on her skin.

"What did you do, Kellaani?" Alex came closer. "I mean, are we talking chocolate body paint here? Whips? Taking each other across Mrs Naganumi's desk?"

I punched her so hard it hurt my hand. Alex shot back a few feet, blood oozing from her nose. I didn't wait for her to get up, I just started kicking out, feeling sick as I did, yearning to wipe out this situation, no, yearning to go back in time and not start kissing after Maths…

Jay and San threw themselves into the fray, but for the first time ever, Shar and Dash just sat there. And afterwards, even when our science teacher came in and they had to get the caretaker to drag me off Alex, even after that, the two girls who'd said they were my friends turned away from me and talked among themselves.

During Biology that afternoon I tripped Alex up when she went to write something on the board. It wasn't much, but it was a start.

Chiyo said find their weak points. She was right. Punching Alex in Chemistry may have made me feel good, but it hadn't done anything. I needed to hurt that girl, show her what it felt like to have someone rip the things you loved out of your soul.

Think, Kellaani, think. How could I really hurt her?

"Will you pair up and get on with the experiment right now!"

My biology teacher's voice knocked me out of my thoughts and I looked round. Everyone else was paired up and Akina wasn't there. I had a feeling she'd run out, and the thirst for revenge strengthened in my stomach.

Hang on. Not everyone was paired up. San Gilbert stood there, a nervous smirk on her face.

"Come on, Sandra, Kellaani, get started."

"Oh, do I have to go with her?" San pleaded. "I don't feel comfortable with it…"

Someone tittered. I tried to ignore it, and said, "Geez, San, you don't think I'd make a move on you, do you? It's not like you're attractive or anything."

San sneered at me, but she walked over to the bench and started setting out the equipment. Alex was a few benches away from us, working with Jay.

Suddenly I realised what I could do.

I set out a dusty benchboard, test tubes, Bunsen burner, then handed San the box of matches.

"Light it, baby."

And I knew what I'd remembered was right, as San dropped the matches and said, "No. No, I won't."

"What, are you scared?" I took out a match and lit it. Then I held it up, close to San's face. I heard her whimper. Suddenly she sounded very young.

The light flickered in her eyes. I said, "What, are you scared I might do something? Something nasty?"

"Put it out, Kellaani," San said, not even trying to hide her fear. "Get it away…"

I blew out the match before it could burn my fingers. "Come on, Sandra. Someone's got to light the Bunsen, haven't they?"

"I won't do it and you can't make me!" The words snapped out like breaking plastic.

I lit another match. Yes, the memory was growing stronger now…Alex and Jay and San smoking round the back of the bike sheds…San cringing back as Jay flicked her lighter on and off, on and off…And Alex saying, nervously, "Stop it, I don't like it either…"

Gently, I passed the match across San's line of vision. "Nice, isn't it?" I said. "And so small. It could leap, you know. Onto your hair. Onto your clothes. Burn you all up. It hurts a lot, to be burnt alive. I've heard, anyway."

"Stop it!" San's voice shrilled out into the classroom. "Stop it! Stop it!"

"Leave her alone!" Alex came hurrying towards me.

"Then leave me alone," I said. "I mean it, Al. Quit getting at me and Akina, and I'll stop giving your little sis nightmares." I brought the match nearer to San's hair.

"Fine, I won't get at you," Alex snarled. "Just stop that. Stop it right now."

I blew the match out as it burnt my fingers. Trying to ignore the pain, I said, "Cool. Glad that's all sorted out. Now, shall we get back to biology?"

There was hate in Alex's eyes. It startled me. I'd never seen her look that furious before.

My hands were shaking as I put down the matchbox. I didn't understand what had happened. I hadn't thought I could pull that off, but I had. Somehow.

I caught my reflection in the window, streaked with dribbles of rain. My eyes looked very dark, almost hollow. But I'd done it. I'd got Alex off my back at last.

After Biology was History. As usual, I dozed in my seat by the window.

Akina had come back into school. She sat there, red-eyed, giving me the occasional miserable smile.

Alex wasn't there now.

And Shar and Dash still weren't talking to me. They chatted loudly together, backs turned. I didn't want to open myself to rejection. They were my friends. Or had been. Why do something to underline the point that they weren't any more?

Outside the rain was falling harder. I stared down at the drenched street, speckled with mud. Kogane in the rain. Just great. And I'd have to walk home in it.

There was a damp figure running down the street, hair blood-coloured and dripping.

What was Alex doing?

If I'd got her to run out, that was a first for me. And it paid her back for doing the same to Akina.

I grinned. Don't cross me, bitch. I'm not letting you grind me down. I'm not letting anyone grind me down. Not you. Not Shar and Dash. And definitely not Shiro.

Alex crept back in five minutes before the end of the lesson, soaked to the skin. She didn't offer an excuse and none was asked for.

As the lesson finished and we began packing our books up, San yelled, "Gonna stay behind and play hunt the pussy again, Kellaani?"

"Burn in hell, Gilbert." I emphasised the first word.

San walked over and picked up my history textbook. She flipped through the pages, and said, "No lesbians in here. Shame. Maybe we should tell the school that there's an unrepresented minority in our class."

"Give it back and grow up."

"Come and get it." She waved it and swung her hips.

I ran over, slapped her, and tried to grab the book. San turned and ran out of the classroom. I followed, not caring so much about the book, more about not letting her win.

I finally caught up with her outside the geography classroom and wrested the book back. San sneered at me, then dashed away.

I walked back up to the history classroom. It was empty. A little hurt that Akina hadn't waited, I picked up my bag and set out into the rain.

The playground was empty. Geez, couldn't she have even said goodbye? It wasn't like we'd rowed or anything.

I shivered in the cold, damp air – and the shivering seemed to unlock something in my brain, and I remembered with horror Alex's words.

I won't get at you.

You.

No mention of Akina.

San's timing had been very good, just now. She'd decoyed me out of the classroom – and when I'd got back Akina had been gone.

And where exactly had Alex run to during history?

I was standing there, trembling, when San rushed up to me.

"Message from Alex," she said. She was trembling too. "She's taking Akina for a swimming party along with her brother and sisters."

I stared at her, hardly able to take it in. "You're making this up. Stop it."

"I'm not…" San didn't look too happy. "Look, I hate you, but I don't mind Akina…and I'm scared…Alex is really mad about that fire trick. And everyone knows Akina's sisters are psychos."

"Where are they?" I shouted.

"The river, where else? Near the entrance to the sewers."

The history book dropped from my arms, and I ran. San followed me, splashing through the puddles.

"Alex wanted you to know…" she gasped.

"She told you to steal my book, right?"

"Yes."

"Then move it. I don't know what she's planning, but it ain't gonna be good."

Kogane River runs all around the north-east edge of Tokyo-to, but most of the district is built high above it. There's only one point where you can actually get into it without plummeting.

I ran down the steps, nearly slipping on them, and faced the sight in front of me.

A cluster of people. Akina's siblings. Alex. Akina herself. Everyone was covered in rain, but Akina was drenched.

There was a splash, and I saw Akina's bag begin to sink in the water.

Red fury rose in front of my eyes. I ran forward, and shouted, "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

Alex turned. Her eyes gave me a shock. They were determined, gritted teeth, I'm-not-giving-up eyes.

"Hey, Kellaani," she said. No laughter in her voice now. "I'm showing you you're not the only one who can play the fear game."

Akina was shaking. Her chest rose and fell in quick, nervous breaths.

"Let go of her right now," I shouted.

"Make us, babe." Her brother was holding one of her arms, one of her sisters the other.

"I'm glad you've turned up," Alex said. "Now you can watch the fun."

There was no gloating in her words. She was as furious as I was, I realised.

"Akina, baby, have another swim," she said.

Her siblings flung her forward. I heard Akina sob, the sound catching in her throat, and then she hit the water. They gripped her arms as she sank and rose again.

It was deep there. When they dragged her up she was crying, not caring that we could see.

I felt tears in my own eyes, and quickly blinked them away. I had to be strong. I rushed forward, and hit out at Alex.

It was one of my most pathetic charges ever, and I'm not surprised it failed. Akina's other sister caught one of my arms, Alex grabbed the other. She twisted it up behind my back, and said, "Take a look, Akina. Your girlfriend's come to rescue you!"

Akina looked at me, and tried to speak, but she couldn't get enough breath.

"Let go of me," I shouted, trying to twist away. "And let go of her, she can't breathe!"

"Can't she? Oops, I don't see how that could have happened."

I heard the same tone in Alex's voice that I'd heard in Data's when she'd been kicking me. Hurt. And deep, deep fury.

They pushed Akina to her knees, and shoved her face in the water. Akina struggled, but I could see it was no good. I fought against the hands on my wrists, my throat tightening from rage and fear. I had to help her, I had to…

They dropped her on the soaked concrete, and she lay there, coughing and choking like a fish out of water. I saw her chest leap and fall again, I heard her struggling to find air, I remember her hands convulsing against the ground as she gasped.

She coughed, a deep painful sound that echoed round the alleyway.

"What's wrong with her?" Alex sounded shaken now.

"She's bloody well got asthma, you stupid cow!" I screamed. "Let go of me and do something!"

They did, and I dropped down next to Akina. There was a terrible wheezing sound coming from her throat, and my heart stopped a second as I saw that her lips were blue.

"Is there anything we can do?" Alex said. "Doesn't she have any medicine or something?"

"Oh, sure she has medicine," I snapped. "She has medicine in her bag, which you just threw into the river!"

"Shit!" San rushed down the steps towards us. "What're we gonna do?"

"Call an ambulance!" Alex yelled. "Quick!"

San turned and ran back up the steps to the street.

"Akina," I said, trying to keep my voice calm. "Akina, honey, it's me. Come on. You're okay."

She looked up at me, but I don't know if she saw me. Her eyes were unfocused.

"Can't…breathe…"

Her siblings were crowding round her. Her brother looked shocked, but her sisters' faces were impassive.

I took her damp hands, tried to lead the normal Akina out of this horrible, dying thing. I'd never seen her get this bad before. "Sssh…Sssh, it's okay…"

I could dimly feel Alex standing behind me, horror radiating from her. Rain ran down the back of my neck.

Akina choked again and her eyes rolled up in her skull.

"Oh, my god…she's not breathing…"

"Can you do mouth-to-mouth?" her brother asked.

"I'll try…"

I laid Akina on her back, pinched her nose, and placed my lips on hers. Shit, I couldn't remember how many times you had to do it…

I breathed in, and her chest rose, then fell. Breathe in. Breathe in. Akina's hair floated damp and dirty in the puddles around us. Her lips were soft and cold.

Breathe in. Breathe in. Come on, Akina, bite, take the bait, start breathing again, damn you!

Her sisters had melted away into the shadows. Her brother and Alex stood there still, rain pouring over them.

Breathe in. Breathe in.

San came running back. "I called them…they're on their way…"

Alex gave a sharp sob.

Breathe in. Breathe in.

Nothing.

I felt tears pool up in my eyes again, mingle with the rain already covering my face. I kept on breathing for her, desperately trying to keep her alive. Me kneeling, her lying, both soaked, under a grey sky.

I don't want to write any more. It hurts to think about this.

Oh, do I have to spell it out for you? She died, okay? The ambulance came, but it was too late. She died. I couldn't save her.

I hate myself. I hate Alex. And I hate you, you for making me tell this. I'm crying again. I haven't done that for ages. You better review this. I'm not putting myself through the pain for nothing.

Oh, well. On with the story.