Hey there people! My first fic on fanfiction.net! Hurray! Well.. I don't own FF8, nor Fujin.. in actuality.. I am only own a ferret and a box of raisins. If you want the box of raisins, feel free to sue.
And so.. we get on with the show..
The Fujin Kazeno Show
Author: Thank you all for joining us! This is yet another one of those wonderful ideas that sprout up in my demented little head. So sit back, and I personally welcome you all to the Fujin Kanezo show!
Fujin: VIEWERS, WELCOME. RAIJIN?
Raijin: Huh? Ohh right! Now's where I announce the guests tonight, ya know. Right Fu-sama?
Fujin: RAGE! RAIJIN, MORON!
Raijin: Oww! Jeez! I didn't deserve that, ya know… well our first guest tonight is….. ::Whispering:: Could you raise that cue card a little higher ya know?
Fujin: Grrrrrrrrr…
Raijin: There ya go, ya know! Our first guest tonight is… Rinoa Heartilly, ya know!
Fujin: Of all the stupid, retarded people in the game it just had to be WELCOME, RINOA!
Rinoa steps out onto the stage.
Rinoa: Hi there!
Raijin: Wow! I could cut down a tree with those legs, ya know!
Fujin: BOTHERING, GUEST!!
Raijin: There's no need to screech at me like that, ya know.
Seifer, who is operating the camera, takes this moment to pop up.
Seifer: You think she's bad now? You should see her in the sack! She lets out this glass shattering screech when you lick..
Fujin(Blushing a bright red): RAGE!! SEIFER SHUT UP!!!!!
Fujin hurls her coffee mug at Seifer, clocking him in the head.
Rinoa: Hey! I thought I was supposed to be the guest here!
Fujin: OH! GUEST, RIGHT! HOW LIFE?
Rinoa: Great! I'm currently dating Squall, the commander of SeeD! Him and me have saved the earth from evil sorceress's!…. Ohh hi there Seifer honey!
Seifer tries desperately to hide himself.
Rinoa(Turning to Fujin): He was always such a great lover! Seifer would do the cutest thing when we went out on dates. He really likes it when you nibble on his left ear lobe and…
By this point, Fujin's left eyebrow is twitching.
Fujin: RAGE!!
Fujin presses the 'Reject' button on her desk, and Rinoa gets catapulted through the ceiling.
Raijin: See see?! I told ya you'd use that button, ya know! Can I get my candy now Fu-sama?!
Fujin calmly hands Raijin the package of candy corn.
Raijin: Yeeesss! I love candy corn!
Seifer: Hey Fu-chan, now's when you do your special segment just before the commercial.
Fujin: AFFIRMATIVE!
……………………………………………………………………………….
Announcer(Formerly known as the author): And now it's time for… Fu Thinks. The segment where Fu-sama tells you how she feels about life and humanity.
Camera cuts to Fujin, sitting in front of a red velvet curtain. Fujin clears her throat, then picks up the mike. Camera zooms in on Fujin's face.
Fujin: Hello good viewers, and welcome to Fu Thinks. Today, we will be discussing people that build protective barriers around themselves to protect themselves from emotional pain. These people must realize that this isn't a way to protect yourselves. Running from your pain only brings more pain. Furthermore…
The camera suddenly moves down and zooms in on Fujin's crotch. Seifer can be heard chuckling in the background. Fujin looks over on the monitor and sees where the camera is pointing.
Fujin(Blushing again): RAGE!!! SEIFER ASSHOLE!!!
Fujin thens dashes at the camera, and beats Seifer. The camera falls to the floor, focusing on Fujin's feet which are kicking Seifer in the ribs. Curses and screams of horror can be heard in the background. Raijin then begins trying to break up the scuffle.
Announcer: Thank you for joining us for, Fu Thinks.
Suddenly, Raijin screams.
Raijin: NOOOO!!! Not my candy corn, ya know!! Why hyne, why?!
And so.. we get on with the show..
The Fujin Kazeno Show
Author: Thank you all for joining us! This is yet another one of those wonderful ideas that sprout up in my demented little head. So sit back, and I personally welcome you all to the Fujin Kanezo show!
Fujin: VIEWERS, WELCOME. RAIJIN?
Raijin: Huh? Ohh right! Now's where I announce the guests tonight, ya know. Right Fu-sama?
Fujin: RAGE! RAIJIN, MORON!
Raijin: Oww! Jeez! I didn't deserve that, ya know… well our first guest tonight is….. ::Whispering:: Could you raise that cue card a little higher ya know?
Fujin: Grrrrrrrrr…
Raijin: There ya go, ya know! Our first guest tonight is… Rinoa Heartilly, ya know!
Fujin: Of all the stupid, retarded people in the game it just had to be WELCOME, RINOA!
Rinoa steps out onto the stage.
Rinoa: Hi there!
Raijin: Wow! I could cut down a tree with those legs, ya know!
Fujin: BOTHERING, GUEST!!
Raijin: There's no need to screech at me like that, ya know.
Seifer, who is operating the camera, takes this moment to pop up.
Seifer: You think she's bad now? You should see her in the sack! She lets out this glass shattering screech when you lick..
Fujin(Blushing a bright red): RAGE!! SEIFER SHUT UP!!!!!
Fujin hurls her coffee mug at Seifer, clocking him in the head.
Rinoa: Hey! I thought I was supposed to be the guest here!
Fujin: OH! GUEST, RIGHT! HOW LIFE?
Rinoa: Great! I'm currently dating Squall, the commander of SeeD! Him and me have saved the earth from evil sorceress's!…. Ohh hi there Seifer honey!
Seifer tries desperately to hide himself.
Rinoa(Turning to Fujin): He was always such a great lover! Seifer would do the cutest thing when we went out on dates. He really likes it when you nibble on his left ear lobe and…
By this point, Fujin's left eyebrow is twitching.
Fujin: RAGE!!
Fujin presses the 'Reject' button on her desk, and Rinoa gets catapulted through the ceiling.
Raijin: See see?! I told ya you'd use that button, ya know! Can I get my candy now Fu-sama?!
Fujin calmly hands Raijin the package of candy corn.
Raijin: Yeeesss! I love candy corn!
Seifer: Hey Fu-chan, now's when you do your special segment just before the commercial.
Fujin: AFFIRMATIVE!
……………………………………………………………………………….
Announcer(Formerly known as the author): And now it's time for… Fu Thinks. The segment where Fu-sama tells you how she feels about life and humanity.
Camera cuts to Fujin, sitting in front of a red velvet curtain. Fujin clears her throat, then picks up the mike. Camera zooms in on Fujin's face.
Fujin: Hello good viewers, and welcome to Fu Thinks. Today, we will be discussing people that build protective barriers around themselves to protect themselves from emotional pain. These people must realize that this isn't a way to protect yourselves. Running from your pain only brings more pain. Furthermore…
The camera suddenly moves down and zooms in on Fujin's crotch. Seifer can be heard chuckling in the background. Fujin looks over on the monitor and sees where the camera is pointing.
Fujin(Blushing again): RAGE!!! SEIFER ASSHOLE!!!
Fujin thens dashes at the camera, and beats Seifer. The camera falls to the floor, focusing on Fujin's feet which are kicking Seifer in the ribs. Curses and screams of horror can be heard in the background. Raijin then begins trying to break up the scuffle.
Announcer: Thank you for joining us for, Fu Thinks.
Suddenly, Raijin screams.
Raijin: NOOOO!!! Not my candy corn, ya know!! Why hyne, why?!