Title: Asha's Life Sucks. Whoohoo!
Author: UNKNOWN
A/N: Ok, here it is, I'm gonna kill her off. Thanx everyone for the great reviews. Sorry I can't do more, but I'm just too busy with Dreams, school, friends, parents, you get the picture. Well, it's been fun writing this, now kick back and enjoy the last chapter of Asha's sucky life!
The writers of Dark Angel (who are some of the stupidest people on earth) call Asha into their office.
"Asha," they say. "You're stupid. You're pointless. Everyone hates you. So we're going to kill you off."
"No, you can't do that!" Asha said.
"Yes, we can. We're sorry, Asha, but it's what the people want." They open the window and there are bunches of people screaming "WE HATE ASHA!! WE HATE ASHA!!" over and over.
"Now go back to the show. We'll kill you there."
"When? How?"
"None of your business you stupid bitch now GO!"
The writers use their evil powers to zap her back into the show.
Asha finds herself in an especially bad part of Seattle. She looks around and realizes that this is where she lives. She goes up to her apartment, thinking that if she sits up there all day they can't kill her. She sits there a for a while and eventually forgets that anyone is trying to kill her, because she's just stupid like that. She decides to go out and see Logan, who by the way has forgotten she ever existed.
Out in the street some gangs are having a shoot-out. Asha, dumb bitch that she is, walks right in the middle of it. She gets shot 50 times, but the writers didn't want to kill Asha like that, so they let her live. She walks toward Logan's, covered in blood, and on the way gets stabbed, mugged, and run over by a bus. But this happens to her every day so she didn't think much of it. Neither did the writers.
She walks into Logan's apartment to find Logan cooking breakfast. Logan looks up.
"Who the hell are you?" He asks, cause remember, he forgot Asha ever existed.
"Asha, remember?"
"Oh, Asha…didn't I run you over?" He takes a good look at her. "Why are you covered in blood?"
Max walks in then from Logan's bedroom. "Morning hon." She says as she wraps her arms around his waist. She notices Asha.
Max looks up toward the ceiling and yells: "OK, that is totally no fair. How come you can kill off Ben, Tinga, and Lydecker, but you can't kill some stupid bitch that everyone WANTS dead?"
"Hang on, we're working on it", say's this big powerful voice that everyone can hear but Asha.
"Oh, screw this." Max said. "I'm gonna kill her myself!" She took a long pole (don't ask me where she got it from) and tried to hit Asha with it. Asha ducked and the pole flew out the window.
"Oh, that's it you little bitch!" Max launched herself at Asha and pushed her out the broken window. Asha was impaled on the pole, which had landed sticking straight up. The writers liked this and decided to leave Asha there for a couple of days.
No good ol' Ames heard about this girl impaled on a pole down in sector nine that was still alive. He figured that if she could stay alive that long while impaled on a pole, she must be a transgenic. So he came late at night when there was no one looking and took Asha down to the lab, where the guys at forensics took her apart alive, only to find nothing special. She was still alive so they threw her in a cage and didn't feed her or anything. The writers liked this, and Asha finally died.
That night the writers, James Cameron, FOX, Max, Logan, and everyone else on the show had a big party to celebrate her death, and all the fans had one to. UNKNOWN was glad that they finally listened to her and the rest of the fans about Asha, and began to plot about what it would take to get them to fix the rest of the show…
A/N: So did she suffer enough for you?
Author: UNKNOWN
A/N: Ok, here it is, I'm gonna kill her off. Thanx everyone for the great reviews. Sorry I can't do more, but I'm just too busy with Dreams, school, friends, parents, you get the picture. Well, it's been fun writing this, now kick back and enjoy the last chapter of Asha's sucky life!
The writers of Dark Angel (who are some of the stupidest people on earth) call Asha into their office.
"Asha," they say. "You're stupid. You're pointless. Everyone hates you. So we're going to kill you off."
"No, you can't do that!" Asha said.
"Yes, we can. We're sorry, Asha, but it's what the people want." They open the window and there are bunches of people screaming "WE HATE ASHA!! WE HATE ASHA!!" over and over.
"Now go back to the show. We'll kill you there."
"When? How?"
"None of your business you stupid bitch now GO!"
The writers use their evil powers to zap her back into the show.
Asha finds herself in an especially bad part of Seattle. She looks around and realizes that this is where she lives. She goes up to her apartment, thinking that if she sits up there all day they can't kill her. She sits there a for a while and eventually forgets that anyone is trying to kill her, because she's just stupid like that. She decides to go out and see Logan, who by the way has forgotten she ever existed.
Out in the street some gangs are having a shoot-out. Asha, dumb bitch that she is, walks right in the middle of it. She gets shot 50 times, but the writers didn't want to kill Asha like that, so they let her live. She walks toward Logan's, covered in blood, and on the way gets stabbed, mugged, and run over by a bus. But this happens to her every day so she didn't think much of it. Neither did the writers.
She walks into Logan's apartment to find Logan cooking breakfast. Logan looks up.
"Who the hell are you?" He asks, cause remember, he forgot Asha ever existed.
"Asha, remember?"
"Oh, Asha…didn't I run you over?" He takes a good look at her. "Why are you covered in blood?"
Max walks in then from Logan's bedroom. "Morning hon." She says as she wraps her arms around his waist. She notices Asha.
Max looks up toward the ceiling and yells: "OK, that is totally no fair. How come you can kill off Ben, Tinga, and Lydecker, but you can't kill some stupid bitch that everyone WANTS dead?"
"Hang on, we're working on it", say's this big powerful voice that everyone can hear but Asha.
"Oh, screw this." Max said. "I'm gonna kill her myself!" She took a long pole (don't ask me where she got it from) and tried to hit Asha with it. Asha ducked and the pole flew out the window.
"Oh, that's it you little bitch!" Max launched herself at Asha and pushed her out the broken window. Asha was impaled on the pole, which had landed sticking straight up. The writers liked this and decided to leave Asha there for a couple of days.
No good ol' Ames heard about this girl impaled on a pole down in sector nine that was still alive. He figured that if she could stay alive that long while impaled on a pole, she must be a transgenic. So he came late at night when there was no one looking and took Asha down to the lab, where the guys at forensics took her apart alive, only to find nothing special. She was still alive so they threw her in a cage and didn't feed her or anything. The writers liked this, and Asha finally died.
That night the writers, James Cameron, FOX, Max, Logan, and everyone else on the show had a big party to celebrate her death, and all the fans had one to. UNKNOWN was glad that they finally listened to her and the rest of the fans about Asha, and began to plot about what it would take to get them to fix the rest of the show…
A/N: So did she suffer enough for you?