MANDA ISLAND MAYHEM
[Manda Island/Pokte Village Set in Fiji]
[Just before the Big battle with the Giant Crab.]
MM: I don't wanna hurt my Tron! u.u
D: Look. If she gets hurt, we'll postpone filming until she's fine again, and you still get to have that kinky scene at Saul Kada later, okay?
MM: But you'll censor that scene anyway so what's the point of doing it? [sob]
D: Just blow up the damn robot. If you do I'll let you...um...date her on the Sulfur-Bottom.
MM: Really? @_@ [gets all bambi-eyed]
D: Yes, really.
MM: Are you sure?
D: YES, I'M DAMN SURE. Look, I'll CG the explosions for you and later on, I'll book you a nice, private suite aboard the Sulfur-Bottom.
MM: With a closet?
D: JUST SHUT UP AND KILL THE FACKING ROBOT, OKAY?!
MM: Tch. Fine. But don't come crying to me if she gets killed!
T: [from Giant Crab] Could you make that a first-class suite? The economy ones just suck!
D: [facepalm] I gone to China to film with Ryu and Nina for the BOF movie...but nooo, the producers said I work better with these people...filthy little...oh [spots data]...Data's watching us again?
Stage Guy 1: Yup.
D: SHIT!
Data: Eek Eek!
[Pokte Island set in Fiji]
[Big fight with Tron's Giant Crab]
[Crab 'explodes' and Tron is thrown out]
MM: Tron! Are you all right?!
T: I guess...but now that you're here, I feel much better now! [she stands up]
D: Cut! You weren't supposed to be kind to Trigger after you get thrown out! Stage Guy 1, tell the Servbot ship to turn around for another try.
Stage Guy 1: I can't! The radio's not working!
D: [facepalm] Uh oh That must mean only one thing...
MM: Look out!
T: Where?! AAAAGH! [Servbot ship heading straight towards her]
Teisel: [in the Servebot ship] This'll teach you to stop hitting on Trigger even if it kills me!
MM: [to Tron] I'll save you!
[Trigger leaps in front of the ship and there's a spectacular mid-air collision resulting in some serious bone-breaking]
T: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! TRIGGER! O.O
[6 weeks and one painful surgery later, after refilming of battle with Giant Crab]
Stage Guy 1: [looking at a shaking hut] Hey, wasn't that hut supposed to be destroyed?
D: Yeah...why the hell is it shaking?
Stage Guy 2: Anybody seen Trigger and Tron?
D: O.O [looks at the shaking hut] Oh god. No. Please no. Not again.
Stage Guy 1: I guess they don't need their Sulfur-Bottom reservations, eh?
[Pokte Key Ruins]
[When Blue Security key is inserted and bridge pillar rises]
[Take 1]
D: ACTION!
R: Wow! Did you see that?
MM: Nah, I've seen bigger, that's just a little...
D: CUT!
[Watch Austin Powers 3: Goldmember in theaters soon!]
[Take 2]
R: Wow! Did you see that?
MM: Yeah, and I think something's oozing out of the top...
D: CUT! ENOUGH OF THE SEX TALK ALRIGHT!? X-O
[After fighting Bola Round 2]
[Take 1]
B: You'd better enjoy your youth while you can. Develop your skills, because your speed won't last forever.
MM: That means I'll have to learn the KarmaSutra real fast now...
D: CUT! I DO NOT WANT TO BE THE FIRST GUY TO RECEIVE THE AO RATING FOR THIS GAME!
[Take 2]
B: You'd better enjoy your youth while you can. Develop your skills, because your speed won't last forever.
MM: [looking down at something] I know THIS won't last forever so I gotta use it on Tron right NOW!
T: [offstage] Awwww...how sweet!
D: CUT! HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU...
[Coffee Break]
MM: So you don't want anyone else to know?
B: Yup, I want it to remain a secret. You can only tell Claymoor, alright?
MM: Deal. [Trigger and Bola shake hands]
[In comes Tron]
T: Hey guys, what was it that you two wanted to keep a secret?
MM: The fact that Bola has a gay relationship with Claymoor. Oops...
B: AAAAAAAAAGH! YOU LITTLE...[slits Trigger's wrists with his knives]
Teisel: Ha Ha!
[In comes Claymoor who sees Trigger bleeding out on the ground]
C: What happened in here? Who's got a gay relationship with me?
T: You don't want to know.
[1 month, 2 weeks, and 2 painful surgeries later]
[Preparing for the big boss fight in Pokte Key Ruins]
Stage Guy 1: That's the big frog reaverbot you'll be fighting. Stay on the platforms and you won't get hurt if you can evade his attacks.
MM: Are you talking about the frog with the really long tongue?
Stage Guy 1: Yup. Watch your wrists.
MM: O_o Keep that tongue away from my stash. I'm saving it for Tron.
Stage Guy 1: right...HEY! TEISEL, GET AWAY FROM THAT! PUT THAT DOWN!
[Fighting the big frog in Pokte Key Ruins]
AND NOW FOR THE COUP DE GREASE!
[The frog's tongue attack does a killer low-blow on MM.]
MM: AAAAAAAGH! FACK! XO
D: Cut the scene! Get a medic over there!
Teisel: [offstage] Yes! My plan worked perfectly!
[Stage Guy 1 shuts off all the reaverbots in the arena while Trigger writhes in agony on one of the platforms.]
[Medic, Director, and Stage Guy 1 make their way over to Trigger's platform. Data follows.]
Medic: Alright Trigger, I'll need you to calm down.
MM: HOW THE FACK CAN I CALM DOWN WHEN I'VE JUST BEEN NAILED IN THE NADS BY A GIANT TONGUE!
D: [noticing a large hole in the crotch part of MM's armor] WHOA! That is embarrassing!
Teisel: [from offstage] YOU DESERVE IT YOU PERVERTED BASTORD!
[You can't see the hole because the medic is blocking it.]
Stage Guy 1: [to cameraman off-screen] You! Get that footage deleted. We don't want this to become the feel-good movie of the year!
Cameraman: Got it! [smashes and burns his filming camera]
Medic: [Using chloroform on Trigger's face] Dang, the chloroform isn't working. We need to calm him down somehow while I apply bandages.
Stage Guy 1: I know, leave it to me! [leaves filming area]
[2 minutes later... Stage Guy returns with Tron]
Medic: He hasn't calmed down one bit even after all those painkillers! What now!
Stage Guy 1: I brought someone who can help. Tron, do your thing!
T: Alrighty! [Gives Trigger a big kiss]
[Trigger calms down but then...]
Medic: AAAGH! GADDEMET! Something poked me in the eye!
Director: O_X Ewwwwwwwww...
[After re-filming the Pokte Key Ruins Shots]
D: [facepalm] I'm having a very bad day today. I need to be cheered up. BRING ME THE MAYOR!
[The Sexy mayor of Pokte village comes in and feels up the director.]
D: [getting real hot] Ahhhh...that feels much better...
Stage Guy 1: [sweatdrop] Um...Director?
D: [frustrated at his interruption] What, can't a guy like me have a beautiful girl for himself too? Puhleeze...
Stage Guy 1: What I meant to say...was...uhh...that monkey-in-a-bowl, Data...um...
D: Spit it out man, and hurry cuz she's about to 'sharpen my pencil,' if you know what I mean.
Stage Guy 1: Umm...alright...Data's filming us again.
Data: Eeeek Eeeek! [puts his camera away]
D: [leaps out of his pants] AAAAAAAAGH! WAT DA FACK!?
Mayor: Now was that the number 1 or the number 2 pencil?
[End of Manda Island Mayhem, Bring in the Dancing Lobsters!]
[Manda Island/Pokte Village Set in Fiji]
[Just before the Big battle with the Giant Crab.]
MM: I don't wanna hurt my Tron! u.u
D: Look. If she gets hurt, we'll postpone filming until she's fine again, and you still get to have that kinky scene at Saul Kada later, okay?
MM: But you'll censor that scene anyway so what's the point of doing it? [sob]
D: Just blow up the damn robot. If you do I'll let you...um...date her on the Sulfur-Bottom.
MM: Really? @_@ [gets all bambi-eyed]
D: Yes, really.
MM: Are you sure?
D: YES, I'M DAMN SURE. Look, I'll CG the explosions for you and later on, I'll book you a nice, private suite aboard the Sulfur-Bottom.
MM: With a closet?
D: JUST SHUT UP AND KILL THE FACKING ROBOT, OKAY?!
MM: Tch. Fine. But don't come crying to me if she gets killed!
T: [from Giant Crab] Could you make that a first-class suite? The economy ones just suck!
D: [facepalm] I gone to China to film with Ryu and Nina for the BOF movie...but nooo, the producers said I work better with these people...filthy little...oh [spots data]...Data's watching us again?
Stage Guy 1: Yup.
D: SHIT!
Data: Eek Eek!
[Pokte Island set in Fiji]
[Big fight with Tron's Giant Crab]
[Crab 'explodes' and Tron is thrown out]
MM: Tron! Are you all right?!
T: I guess...but now that you're here, I feel much better now! [she stands up]
D: Cut! You weren't supposed to be kind to Trigger after you get thrown out! Stage Guy 1, tell the Servbot ship to turn around for another try.
Stage Guy 1: I can't! The radio's not working!
D: [facepalm] Uh oh That must mean only one thing...
MM: Look out!
T: Where?! AAAAGH! [Servbot ship heading straight towards her]
Teisel: [in the Servebot ship] This'll teach you to stop hitting on Trigger even if it kills me!
MM: [to Tron] I'll save you!
[Trigger leaps in front of the ship and there's a spectacular mid-air collision resulting in some serious bone-breaking]
T: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! TRIGGER! O.O
[6 weeks and one painful surgery later, after refilming of battle with Giant Crab]
Stage Guy 1: [looking at a shaking hut] Hey, wasn't that hut supposed to be destroyed?
D: Yeah...why the hell is it shaking?
Stage Guy 2: Anybody seen Trigger and Tron?
D: O.O [looks at the shaking hut] Oh god. No. Please no. Not again.
Stage Guy 1: I guess they don't need their Sulfur-Bottom reservations, eh?
[Pokte Key Ruins]
[When Blue Security key is inserted and bridge pillar rises]
[Take 1]
D: ACTION!
R: Wow! Did you see that?
MM: Nah, I've seen bigger, that's just a little...
D: CUT!
[Watch Austin Powers 3: Goldmember in theaters soon!]
[Take 2]
R: Wow! Did you see that?
MM: Yeah, and I think something's oozing out of the top...
D: CUT! ENOUGH OF THE SEX TALK ALRIGHT!? X-O
[After fighting Bola Round 2]
[Take 1]
B: You'd better enjoy your youth while you can. Develop your skills, because your speed won't last forever.
MM: That means I'll have to learn the KarmaSutra real fast now...
D: CUT! I DO NOT WANT TO BE THE FIRST GUY TO RECEIVE THE AO RATING FOR THIS GAME!
[Take 2]
B: You'd better enjoy your youth while you can. Develop your skills, because your speed won't last forever.
MM: [looking down at something] I know THIS won't last forever so I gotta use it on Tron right NOW!
T: [offstage] Awwww...how sweet!
D: CUT! HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU...
[Coffee Break]
MM: So you don't want anyone else to know?
B: Yup, I want it to remain a secret. You can only tell Claymoor, alright?
MM: Deal. [Trigger and Bola shake hands]
[In comes Tron]
T: Hey guys, what was it that you two wanted to keep a secret?
MM: The fact that Bola has a gay relationship with Claymoor. Oops...
B: AAAAAAAAAGH! YOU LITTLE...[slits Trigger's wrists with his knives]
Teisel: Ha Ha!
[In comes Claymoor who sees Trigger bleeding out on the ground]
C: What happened in here? Who's got a gay relationship with me?
T: You don't want to know.
[1 month, 2 weeks, and 2 painful surgeries later]
[Preparing for the big boss fight in Pokte Key Ruins]
Stage Guy 1: That's the big frog reaverbot you'll be fighting. Stay on the platforms and you won't get hurt if you can evade his attacks.
MM: Are you talking about the frog with the really long tongue?
Stage Guy 1: Yup. Watch your wrists.
MM: O_o Keep that tongue away from my stash. I'm saving it for Tron.
Stage Guy 1: right...HEY! TEISEL, GET AWAY FROM THAT! PUT THAT DOWN!
[Fighting the big frog in Pokte Key Ruins]
AND NOW FOR THE COUP DE GREASE!
[The frog's tongue attack does a killer low-blow on MM.]
MM: AAAAAAAGH! FACK! XO
D: Cut the scene! Get a medic over there!
Teisel: [offstage] Yes! My plan worked perfectly!
[Stage Guy 1 shuts off all the reaverbots in the arena while Trigger writhes in agony on one of the platforms.]
[Medic, Director, and Stage Guy 1 make their way over to Trigger's platform. Data follows.]
Medic: Alright Trigger, I'll need you to calm down.
MM: HOW THE FACK CAN I CALM DOWN WHEN I'VE JUST BEEN NAILED IN THE NADS BY A GIANT TONGUE!
D: [noticing a large hole in the crotch part of MM's armor] WHOA! That is embarrassing!
Teisel: [from offstage] YOU DESERVE IT YOU PERVERTED BASTORD!
[You can't see the hole because the medic is blocking it.]
Stage Guy 1: [to cameraman off-screen] You! Get that footage deleted. We don't want this to become the feel-good movie of the year!
Cameraman: Got it! [smashes and burns his filming camera]
Medic: [Using chloroform on Trigger's face] Dang, the chloroform isn't working. We need to calm him down somehow while I apply bandages.
Stage Guy 1: I know, leave it to me! [leaves filming area]
[2 minutes later... Stage Guy returns with Tron]
Medic: He hasn't calmed down one bit even after all those painkillers! What now!
Stage Guy 1: I brought someone who can help. Tron, do your thing!
T: Alrighty! [Gives Trigger a big kiss]
[Trigger calms down but then...]
Medic: AAAGH! GADDEMET! Something poked me in the eye!
Director: O_X Ewwwwwwwww...
[After re-filming the Pokte Key Ruins Shots]
D: [facepalm] I'm having a very bad day today. I need to be cheered up. BRING ME THE MAYOR!
[The Sexy mayor of Pokte village comes in and feels up the director.]
D: [getting real hot] Ahhhh...that feels much better...
Stage Guy 1: [sweatdrop] Um...Director?
D: [frustrated at his interruption] What, can't a guy like me have a beautiful girl for himself too? Puhleeze...
Stage Guy 1: What I meant to say...was...uhh...that monkey-in-a-bowl, Data...um...
D: Spit it out man, and hurry cuz she's about to 'sharpen my pencil,' if you know what I mean.
Stage Guy 1: Umm...alright...Data's filming us again.
Data: Eeeek Eeeek! [puts his camera away]
D: [leaps out of his pants] AAAAAAAAGH! WAT DA FACK!?
Mayor: Now was that the number 1 or the number 2 pencil?
[End of Manda Island Mayhem, Bring in the Dancing Lobsters!]