Disclaimer: I do not own Animorphs, it belongs to K.A. Applegate, and whoever else. You know the deal.

One

I lay there in suspended animation.

I felt myself floating.

The bear was melting. Old grizzly bear, my friend. good old bear.

I demorphed.

I was Rachel again, the human Rachel, alive, unhurt. I could have bounded up and gone off to the mall to shop. But I didn't kid myself. I didn't hope.

I spit the snake out.

I was surrounded on all sides. I was only a weak human girl now. The polar bear loomed over me, his strength the equal of my own grizzly, but now I was just me, just Rachel.

I could see the viewscreen. I could see my best friend, Cassie. Jake. Marco, funny Marco. Ax.

Tobias.

He had morphed. He was his human self once more. He'd done that for me. And because he was crying. I understood. Humans cry, hawks don't.

"I love you," I said to the screen.

And, oh, god, how could so much regret and so much sweetness and so much sadness all be present in that single moment. I was already dead and missing my unlived life. I was already dead and Tobias was mourning.

I tried to smile. For him.

The polar bear said, You fight well, human.

Then he killed me with a single blow.

Time stopped.

He came to me. The Ellimist.

The puppet master come to watch my final act. it figured. He was in his saintly old man guise. As fake as everything else about him. The all-powerful weakling. The mighty manipulator.

"Ellimist," I spat.

"Yes?"

"Answer me something." I raged. "Was all of this worth it? The pain, the despair, the fear. The horror of the violence we suffered, and the violence we caused? Was it all worth it?"

"Rachel, I cannot answer that. The battle is not over." He had used my name. I don't think the Ellimist had ever called any of us by our names before.

But still, it really peeved me. How could he not know? This was a stupid game, between him and that disgusting filth, Crayak. There had to be some clue!

"You." I said accusingly.

"Yes."

"Who are you?" I demanded. "Who are you to play games with us? You appear, you disappear, you play games with us, you use us, who are you, what are you? I deserve an answer."

"Yes," he said yet again, calmly. "You do. To this question, I will give all the answer I know. And when you know me, you will ask another question. And I will answer that question, too. And then . . . "

His voice faded off. I knew what that meant. And then, I would die. I would never set foot on Earth again. I would never see the Animorphs again. I would die.

Then, for what seemed like a very long time, the Ellimist told me. I saw who this creature was. What he was. I understood.

But I also knew he would not save me. That he couldn't under the arcane rules of his millennia-long war with Crayak.

The Ellimist, or Toomin, was there to honour me, and I guess that was nice of him. Wasn't going to help me much.

"Now you know who I am, what I am." he said softly, bringing me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah," I sighed. "You were a kid. Like me in some ways, a kid who got in too deep and couldn't get back out."

"A kid."

"You were trapped. You still are. I've been trapped."

"Yes."

I thought for a moment. "Was I one of your game pieces? Were all six of us just game pieces?"

That made him stop and think. Eventually, he answered. "I did not cause you to be one of the six. You are . . . you were . . . a happy accident. An unwitting contribution from the human race to its own survival."

I was silent. I wanted so much to live. I wanted so much to stay and not to leave. In a moment, no answer would matter to me, but just the same, I wanted to know what I guess any dying person wants to know.

"You said I could ask one more question."

"Yes."

"I can't ask if we win, I can't ask if it will all turn out okay."

"I don't know those answers."

"Okay, then answer me this, Ellimist. Did I . . . did I make a difference? My life, and my . . . my death . . . was I worth it? Did my life really matter?"

"Yes," he said. "You were brave. You were strong. You were good. You mattered."

"Yeah. Okay, then. Okay then."

I wondered if -

A feminine voice interrupted my thoughts. "Oh, how touching, Toomin. I think I may need a tissue."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Yep, I added a few more things. Its still got the main storyline going, with Xander as an anomaly, but I needed to add a few more things to explain the One. And yep, this chapter is basically just a mixture of The Beginning, and the Ellimist Chronicles, but my story starts next chapter. R&R, and read on!