Chapter 4: Thin Ice
Albert could not be consoled when they returned to Bale. Rumor had not gone far, reached only the closest of villages to the capital of Serdio, but as the group got wind of it, they practically had to restrain the sovereign to keep him from rushing foolishly out into the countryside to get to Indels faster. Sullen and thoughtful, he spoke little during the short trek back into the city and the moment they crossed the threshold, he left his burden beast at the gate and ran across the cobblestones. Dart called after him and gave chase, with Haschel and Meru at his heels. Only Miranda and Kongol remained behind to find their way through the city at their leisure.
"Kongol not understand. Why Human King so upset over castle breaking?" the Gigantos asked, voice rumbling with concern. Miranda shrugged her shoulders and looked toward the ruins of Indels. Her throat constricted, thickening to observe how the tower had crumbled. Mortar dust and limestone chunks had sprayed over all of Bale, some of which had yet to be cleaned. She understood Albert's panic, his need to see to his people and his friends. She felt the same way when Deningrad fell under the might of the Divine Dragon. But, how to put it into terms that a Gigantos would understand was beyond her ken and patience. Albert and Haschel were far better and enlightening Kongol's limited ability to comprehend humanity. It wasn't that he was stupid, far from it. It was simply that his people lived far differently, far more naturally than humans did and sometimes their ways confused him.
"Because inside of the castle were people that Albert cares about, Kongol. People who might have been hurt," she finally ventured. To her relief, the Gigantos nodded solemnly and lapsed into thoughtful silence as they both came to the staircase that lead into Indels. Most of the castle remained intact, all but the first tower. Glistening beneath the sun, Miranda realized she could make out the spiral staircase somewhat, but the rest of it was gone completely. It had been the guest wing, where Princess Emille had been residing for quite some time.
"No wonder he was so anxious to return," the Sacred Sister mused. Realizing she spoke aloud, a gloved hand waved off the askance in Kongol's eyes. "I'm talking to myself."
The pair entered the chaos of the castle, finding a number of Knights lining the staircase, armed and nervous by their stances. A Black Burst Dragon had attacked them, or so the claims were made, and everyone knew that dragons were nigh impossible to defeat for humans. It took a special sort to be able to tackle their ilk. A Dragoon, specifically. Miranda idly touched the stone she knew remained fused to her flesh, feeling its warmth beneath her blouse. If dragons managed to somehow overpower their Dragoon masters, where would that leave humanity?
Indeed, who had seen a dragon lately anyway? The last Miranda knew of had been the Blue Gill dragon defeated by the others before they ever came to her homeland. Or the Divine Dragon, who was one of a kind. Albert mentioned Feyrbrand, too. But since the end of the Dragon Conflict, there had not been a single sighting of an actual dragon beyond a few rumors that lead to cold trails and false allegations. There were no dragons anymore, only their Spirits remained.
"Just leave him alone, Dart!" Haschel's voice echoed from down the corridor as Miranda and Kongol eventually caught up with the rest of the group. Dart, Shana, Meru, and Haschel all stood before the looming doors to the Dragoon Chamber. Dart growled something unintelligible, clearly frustrated. Shana hung back, rocking the child in her arms back and forth and shushing it back to sleep while Meru stood on her tiptoes to get a better look at the babe despite all the tension and anxiety in the air.
"It's no use, Dart. Let's leave him alone for now, we can gather later to discuss this," Haschel repeated himself, reaching out toward his grandson to rest a hand against his shoulder. Dart turned his head sharply, blonde locks swaying with the motion and his eyes betrayed the ire and frustration dominating his thoughts.
"It's not--" he began and then cut himself off, sighing finally in resignation with his shoulders slumping, "I just worry, Albert's my friend. I don't like feeling so, so helpless!"
Haschel smiled ruefully and nodded. "I know, Dart. He's my friend, too. But, I think we all know what it's like to lose someone important in our lives." Turning toward the door, he raised his voice to shout past the locked and barred barrier. "Albert! We'll leave you be for now, but come on out when you feel ready to talk to us again!"
With that, he patted Dart's shoulder and gestured for everyone to follow him back down the corridor. Only Miranda hung back, her steps slowing and halting altogether as she looked back toward the double doors from over her shoulder. Watching to make sure the others didn't realize she'd fallen behind, she began to back pedal, pausing before the Dragoon Chamber before resting her hands against it, pressing her cheek to the cool wood and brass fittings. "Albert?" she said, her voice loud enough to carry past the thick doors but quiet enough not to attract attention from elsewhere. "I'm sorry. For everything. If I could bring her back to you, I would."
The suddenness of the door's opening nearly brought Miranda stumbling into the Dragon Chamber. Instead, she found herself pressed against the taller frame of the King of Serdio. Albert caught her, surprised and startled even in his grief. "Miranda?" His hands rested against her hips at first, and then with the shock of her presence wearing off he had the good sense to brace them against her shoulders instead. Face flushed with chagrin, she straightened immediately, brushing back at her hair and smoothing the fabric of her skirt.
"Aye, Your Majesty. I... should have apologized a long time ago. Her Highness did not deserve my comments, I wish it were not too late to apologize to her personally."
"Oh Miranda," Albert lamented with a exasperated sigh and a shake of his head. Then, he pulled her into the chamber before closing and barring the doors again.
Meru held her hands over her ears, eyes nearly squinted shut to block out the horrendous wail of the babe in Shana's arms. She had never really been exposed to that many babies, being the youngest of her wingly siblings. Besides, Wingly children weren't that loud, were they? Shana eventually got up, excusing herself from the rest of the group. "I think he's hungry. I'll be back later. No, Dart--" she said to her husband with a shake of her head as he got up to follow her, "You stay here, I'm not involved with this but I understand that you are. Albert's my friend, too." And with that, she left the room, the sound of squalling fading with her distance.
"Wow... human children are sure loud," Meru commented, rubbing at her ear as if that might chase away the memory of the disturbing wail.
"You should hear him at three in the morning," Dart added, chuckling softly. "Shana's good with children, though. He'll be quiet soon enough."
"Does she sing that lullaby to him?" Haschel couldn't help but ask, a fond crinkle to his aging eyes with the memory of his own daughter creating the very tune that soothed his grandson and now his great grandson to sleep at night. Dart smiled and nodded. It was strange to them both to have known one another for so long and only recently realized the bond they both shared through Claire.
"Kongol never see Gigantos babe cry so loud. Humans dominate for loud voices?"
At first, everyone stared at Kongol as if they believed him dense again, his ignorance of the world displayed in the questions he persisted in asking. But there was a glint of wry humor in the Gigantos warrior's eyes and after a shocking moment of silence and realization, the others digested the joke and all of them began laughing. Even Kongol, eyes shining with pride at having made a funny, joined in the humor he normally did not partake of. His friends, he knew now, were the only people in the world who laughed with him, not at him.
"By the Gods, I think Kongol's finally figured it out! What a plot humanity has wrought! We shall dominate by the sheer volume of our voices!" Haschel hooted. Dart and Meru laughed even harder, the Wingly clutching her stomach until she suddenly and unceremoniously tipped backwards in her seat and landed on the tile flooring. It only made the laughter that much louder.
"Hey, that's not funny!" Meru cried and yet she giggled despite herself, remaining flat on her back until Kongol reached down to help her back up to her feet. "Hey..." she trailed off, dusting her skirt-tails with her hands as gold eyes darted about the room furtively. "We're missing a Miranda. Where'd she go?"
The laughter faded, then, even if the mirth remained in their countenances. Dart took quick inventory of those present with a flick of his eyes and suddenly gold brows furrowed in contemplation. "I don't know. Last I saw of her was back at the Dragoon Chamber, I think. Did she fall behind?"
Meru snorted derisively, then, fitting her hands onto her hips, "I bet she stayed behind to touch lips with Albert."
"Meru!" Haschel scolded. The Wingly lowered her gaze to the floor, shuffling her toes against the tiles there absently with her chagrin, believing the scolding had been issued for her badly placed comment. But, she had a habit of opening her mouth at the wrong time.
"It's called kissing," Haschel finally corrected and couldn't help but grin at the wingly as her head lifted suddenly and she stomped her foot to realize she'd been fooled.
Dart cleared his throat then, finding the whole conversation amusing, but not terribly realistic. "Should we look for her or you think she'll catch up with the rest of us later?"
"Miranda's a big girl," Haschel replied with a shrug of his shoulders. "Maybe she did stay behind to talk to Albert, who knows. She'll find us when she's ready to. Unless you think she's in danger or something, which I doubt."
Dart nodded in agreement with Kongol mimicking the motion while Meru rubbed at her nose idly, glancing toward the exit to the dining hall. "Hey... I hear someone coming, Shana, is that you?"
The doors swung open to reveal a pair of Knights dressed in their serdian armor. "If you would please come with us, Minister Noish has asked that you speak to him."
Sighing in relief, Shana walked the halls of Indels Castle quietly, enjoying the solitude and the fact that her son now slept peacefully in her arms again, his cries silenced now that she had the time to see to his needs. His birth was a blessing, for it fulfilled all of Shana's dreams at last. How it staggered her to realize two years had passed since her ordeals in the Dragon Conflict. Married to the only man she'd ever wanted to love and now the mother to his child. She smiled gently, smoothing back the smattering of pale hair atop the babe's head. Still unnamed, she wondered what Dart would eventually settle on. Her suggestions so far had been mused over, but no decision rendered, yet. She felt Zieg was a perfect name, just as she wanted a daughter someday to name after Rose, but Dart hesitated to agree with her and Shana could never insist on something if her husband didn't want it. She wasn't like Miranda, demanding and strong willed, defering instead to the tradition of being housewife and mother.
The sound of voices drew her out of her reverie suddenly. She glanced up in time to realize she'd wandered back down toward the Dragoon Chamber. Pausing, she began to pivot when she recognized one of the voices as Albert and then the other as Miranda. Curiosity propelled her forward, after that. Shana never considered herself noisy or an eavesdropper, but last she knew Albert refused to speak with anyone and locked himself away to have time to think. How did Miranda somehow manage to convince him to let her in?
"... shouldn't worry over it. I'd gotten over it a long time ago, so please don't apologize again," Albert said.
"Albert..." came Miranda's imploring voice, "... what happened?"
"This is my own guilt, Miranda. Emille and I... she knows about that night, what we-- I couldn't lie to her. I can't help but believe my infidelity is what somehow caused this in the end."
Shana blinked, lifting her free hand to splay fingers over her mouth as her jaw slackened. The rest of the conversation fell to deaf ears, shame brightening the Moonchild's cheeks with a splash of crimson. She had no right to overhear this, not something so personal between Albert and Miranda. But it certainly answered a lot of questions that nagged at the back of her mind, things long ago forgotten and now suddenly resurfacing. Feeling sick and disgusted with herself, she darted away from the doors before another word could register within her earshot.
The Dragoon Chamber hardly needed the torchlight that lined the wall from fixed sconces. Atop two of the three pedestals that dominated the room shone the bright red and golden-white light of the Red-Eye and Divine Dragoon Spirits. Just in sensing two other Spirits within the room, they glowed with an incandescent light, responding with a low crooning that only Dragoons could detect. The call of one Dragoon to another. Miranda turned her back to the brightness, concentrating her gaze on the king before her and the melancholy gaze that dominated aristocratic features. Despite herself, she could not help the sudden rapidity to her heartbeat, the thickness in her throat that simply could not be swallowed away. To look at him was to behold Adonis in all his glory.
"You shouldn't speak of that as if we had lain together, Albert," she finally croaked, cheeks flushing to realize how hoarse her voice sounded. "What we shared was nothing more than a moment of weakness between two people who needed to share comfort in desperate times. Your love for Emille never wavered, I refuse to believe it did."
Albert chuckled ruefully, shaking his head again as hazelnut eyes lifted to seek out Miranda's sky hued gaze. She felt naked when he looked at her, as if he could somehow read her very thoughts, know the truth of her feelings psychically. "No, Miranda, my love for Lavitz never wavered. Emille? I-- I have done her a great injustice. And you, as well. I have not been honest with myself and it has come around full circle. Now Emille has paid for my mistakes."
Gold brows furrowed, Miranda giving the king a quizzical look. "I don't understand... I know that Lavitz was your lover once but--"
"He was more than that!" Albert snapped reflexively. Shoulders slumped afterwards, sighing ruefully, "Forgive me, I shouldn't snap at you. You're innocent of this."
To her chagrin, Miranda felt her anger die at the sound of his voice. No one yelled at the First Sacred Sister of Mille Seseau, not unless one wanted to receive the same in kind. She fit gloved hands on her hips, caught in the limbo of anger and concern cloying like vastly different perfumes. "Forgiven, this time. But I cannot read your mind, Albert. I never knew Lavitz other than our battle at Mayfil. All I know is what Haschel told me, that he lived and died for you. Love like that... is something out of the fairy tales. I didn't mean to imply that he's just another conquest of yours."
Hazelnut eyes closed, then, Albert breathing in deeply while gathering his thoughts. "Miranda, no matter who I might marry, who I might love in the future, Lavitz will forever overshadow them. To love someone that deeply is not something that ends upon death, it is eternal. Remember that."
He turned from her then, the green cloak swirling around his regal figure while his boots clacked against the tile flooring, carrying him to the doors to unlatch them at last and disappear to the corridor beyond. She remained where she stood, feeling that her legs might turn to gelatin and refuse to carry her if she followed. Why did she care? Miranda had learned long ago how to rely on herself and herself alone. Abandoned at a young age by her mother, forced to care for a drunk and ailing father, she knew well the price of relying on others for support. Yet, even as she sank to her knees to rest before one of the Dragoon Spirit pedestals, all she could think of was the look of despair in Albert's eyes. He still grieved for Lavitz, and couldn't even see the love in front of him for what it really was.
Sky hued eyes narrowed, then, the reality of it and the stark unfairness of it all rankling the Sacred Sister's sense of justice and pride. Get yourself together, girl. No one is going to save you. This is not a fairy tale and you are not some weak and simpering princess. Getting back to her feet, she closed the doors behind her upon leaving the Dragoon Chamber and then turned on the toes of her boot to follow after Albert. One way or another, she would force him to wake up to a new reality.