A lot of stuff has been hashed out on my review board and a lot of people have been hurt in the process. So let's just stop the hating! Please? Anyway, I'm trying to focus on the positive instead of the negative… which isn't too hard because I absolutely adore the lot of you… in particular:

Burned Vamp: thank you for your in depth review! you made me blush! people like you make posting fics worthwhile…

Saiyan Serpent: (as if I didn't go on enough about her the last chapter) but seriously… anyone who is at all confused about my story… read her review! She captures so eloquently (and much more concisely then I) exactly what I was trying to get at. Her review is exactly what I wanted this story to be about! You rock girl!

Secretsguirl: You're awesome! I was waiting for someone to mention Emeril… I'm like in love with him! I can't help but think were soul mates… after all he loves to cook and I love to eat!

Nekoni: yeah…that was way more then a little bit early. What I meant by that scene (which didn't come across too clear, sometimes I forget to explain things because I understand it and I forget not all my readers have esp!) is not that bulma kissed goku… at least not in a romantic sense. She was just feeling pretty worthless and she was trying to prove her desirability/ validate her self worth by kissing the guy next to her. Kind of to 'prove she still got it' if you would. Of course it backfired and only made her feel worse. The point is though, that she might have reacted that way with any guy next to her. It didn't reflect on her feelings for Goku at all. Reading it over, it is a bit confusing and I'm going to go back later and add some more after that part to clear it up a bit. Thanks for catching that!

ssjprincess: make all the speeches you want! You were right on about the encouragement thing.

I know, I know… y'all aren't here to read about me and I'm sure you want to get to the story. But do me a favor and read this message from Vegeta's Princess first. Thanks!

Hey, PLEASE stop writing your problems about me on this fic. If YOU have a problem with ME, then hit ME with it sweetheart DON'T take your problems out on anyone else, they don't have ANYTHING to do with me and you. If you're too chicken to bring your problems to me, then they obviously aren't THAT important anyway. Just one quick question though, if you don't like incest fics, then how exactly do you know I reviewed one? Hmm? Or did you just find a fic that was different, and flame it's reviewers. But, you my dear, are the WORST kind of flamer. The chicken kind. Leave an email address, I DARE YOU!! Better yet, come read one of my fics, you ignorant wench. I'm sorry if you can't handle the fact that not everyone in this world conforms to what YOU want them to be, I REALLY am. But, like I said before, You got a problem with me, then bring it baby!

Ok… (cue music: 'why can't we be friends? why can't we be friends?…') on to the story….

'is this a nightmare?'

The night of the ball, Bulma pulled up to the house feeling like Cinderella. So her 'prince' had left her. She'd do fine on her own. She opened the door to her car and stepped out, careful of her long skirts. She saw Chi-Chi through the kitchen window and waved to her as she stepped into the house.

"Hi Bulma, you look beautiful."

"Thanks, is Goku ready?"

"Ready? For what?"

"The ball-" she noticed the confused look on the other woman's face, "didn't he tell you?"

"Goku!" She screeched. He skidded in quickly, his rented tuxedo askew. "Was there something you wanted to tell me?"

"Hmmm." Goku scratched his head, and looked between the two women, "Oh, I'm going with Bulma to a CC ball tonight."

"Tonight? Don't you think you've been spending enough time with Bulma recently?"

"Yeah, but with Vegita gone-"

"I've been cooking for four hours straight preparing your favorite meal. You didn't think to tell me you weren't going to be here at all during that time?"

"Oh it's ok Chi Chi. There's going to be food there."

There was no point in arguing with Goku. She spun around to look at Bulma.

"This is all your fault!"

"I'm sorry. I didn't know Goku hadn't told you."

"When would he have found the time? He's practically with you every second of the day! Just because you can't hold on to your own man doesn't mean you can steal mine!"

"What? I'm not trying to steal Goku away-"

"You know, you think you're some sort of princess. You think you can just have whatever you want and who cares about the consequences. Think again!"

"It's not like that Chi-Chi. With everything happening, I've been feeling pretty low. Goku's just been trying to cheer me up."

"I'm sure."

"It's true. I've been miserable for so long, Vegita leaving was just the straw that broke the camels back. And Goku's been helping me a lot. Some days, he's the only reason I wake up in the morning. I'm sorry… I've just been so sad lately…"

"You're sad? That's your excuse? You can break up my family because you're sad?"

"Look, let's not do this. Goku… why don't you just stay here ok? I'll save you the leftovers from the ball."

"Oh, playing the martyr? Go with her Goku."

"No, just stay. It's ok."

"Go."

"Really, just stay here."

Goku looked between the two women. His basic survival instinct was telling him to escape. Whatever happened, it couldn't be good. Chi-Chi's loud voice settled the matter.

"Go with her Goku. Frankly, I don't think I can stand to look at either one of your faces tonight anyway."

That seemed to settle the issue and the two left quietly.

The car ride was tense and strained. The silence seemed deafening. Goku smiled, and made an effort to lighten the mood.

"So, what menu did you decide on?"

Bulma played along and smiled too, though it didn't reach her eyes.

"It's a surprise."

More silence.

"Look, Goku, maybe you should just go back and work things out with her."

"No."

"She seemed really upset. I wouldn't mind if you did, really. You're marriage is more important then some stupid ball."

"Bulma…" he called her named softly but she wouldn't take her eyes off the road to meet his gaze. "I'm here because I want to be. She'll get over it."

"Maybe she's right. I have been monopolizing a lot of your time lately. Maybe we shouldn't hang out as much."

"I don't think-"

"We're here. Let's just go in and have a good time. We can talk about this later."

"Ok, Bulma."

Goku had a good time at the ball –the food was amazing! But Bulma went straight to work as soon as she got there. He watched her flit from one group to the next, playing the hostess and securing business partners with practiced ease. She'd laugh and touch a man's arm, flutter her eye lashes and describe the prediction for next fiscal years profit margins versus the cost ratio of packaging and shipping. She was beautiful, intelligent and absolutely undeniable. There wasn't a man in that room that wasn't ready to sign over his company when she turned her attentions on him.

Power oozed out of every pore, she was clearly in her element.

But Goku hated her 'party laugh'. It was fake and held none of the beauty of her real one. He hated the men that stared into her crystal eyes, but didn't notice the carefully hidden bags beneath them. And he hated the way she swayed to the music as she talked, but couldn't go out and dance.

The party began to dwindle down until there was only a dozen odd guests left from the original hundred or so. With a triumphant grin, Bulma finally made her way over to him.

"Hey Goku, Murphy Co. wants us to produce the digi-tech chip in their new cyber pets!"

"Is that a good thing?"

"It's a 7.8 million dollar deal so yeah, I'd say it qualifies as a good thing!"

"That's great Bulma."

"So, did you enjoy the party?"

"Yeah, it was good. I guess you didn't really need me though, you seemed to handle it all on your own!"

"Oh, but I'm so glad you came. Just being able to look over and see a familiar face was such a comfort to me Goku. Thank you so much for coming."

"No problem Bulma. Do you have to stay until everybody leaves?"

"There's not too many people left, why don't we take a walk. I could use some fresh air."

They walked through the gardens in a comfortable silence. After the noise of the party, it was a welcome change. The two stopped at a wrought iron bench and sat down, they could still hear the music of the party far away in the distance.

"I'm really sorry about what happened earlier with Chi-Chi, Goku." Bulma started, "I hope you can work things out with her."

"She's been acting weird recently, but she always calms down. I'm sure she'll be over it by the time I get home." Goku told her confidently. In truth, he had already forgotten about the incident.

"I hope so. I know how it feels to lose someone you love."

Goku made an odd sound beside her.

"What?"

"I don't know. Just, sometimes I wonder whether or not I love her."

"Goku!"

"That sounded bad." he sent her a sheepish grin and scratched the back of his neck. "I meant, I wonder if I can love at all. Maybe saiyans aren't capable of love."

"Vegita always told me saiyans didn't love, but that could be something that's taught, not necessarily something that's genetic."

"What if it is genetic? What if there's some sort of code in your DNA that let's you love, and what if I don't have it? I like Chi-Chi… most times. I have affection for her, and I'd never want anything bad to happen to her, I'd never let anything hurt her… but is that love? What about what she said? If I really loved her, would I still rather spend time with you?"

"I don't know about that Goku, but you can love. I know you can because you have one of the biggest hearts of anybody I've ever known. You love this whole freaking planet, you wouldn't risk your life to save it again and again if you didn't. You're love is self-less and unconditional, that's the best kind there is."

"I hope you're right Bulma."

They stared out at the night sky.

"There is a difference between romantic love and friend love though. Like you wouldn't do the same things with me you'd do with Chi-Chi!" She laughed and he sent her a goofy grin.

"I don't know… I'm you're friend and you kissed me!"

"I hate you!" she laughed again –a real laugh and not one of her fake party laughs. "I thought I made you promise to never bring that up again! Besides, that was different. I was drunk, and upset and I don't know…. I just wanted to feel beautiful."

"You are beautiful."

She sighed and leaned her head against his shoulder.

"Why aren't there more guys out there like you?"

"Because most of my race was annihilated?"

She laughed again, he loved hearing her laugh.

"Don't give me that! I know there weren't any other saiyans like you!"

"Why are you so interested in Saiyans anyway? Chi-chi never talks about it… I think it bothers her that I'm an alien. She tries to pretend it's not true."

She pulled back to look at him.

"I don't know, I think it's interesting. Besides, it's a part of you… even if you don't remember any of it."

She was exhausted, her eyes were glassy and the makeup she had applied hours earlier had all but worn off. The bags under her eyes were now fully visible and the night highlighted just how pale her skin had become. Even the elaborate chignon her long hair had been swept up into had come undone, and loose strands hung down.

But then she gave him a smile and everything seemed to disappear.

The moon light shone down on her, bouncing off her hair and giving her an ethereal appearance. Her lips were red and full and her eyes were so blue they could drown him.

Blue was his favorite color.

Goku knew enough to follow his instincts and leaned over and captured her lips in a gentle kiss.

She pulled away immediately.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" She was shocked and confused but she felt like maybe she knew it all along.

"I don't know." He seemed to echo her emotions.

He leaned over and kissed her again, more insistently.

She pulled away once more, this time lingering a bit longer then necessary.

"Goku… it's wrong. It's so wrong for so many reasons on so many levels."

Each sat back and stared out into the night sky.

He was everything she had ever wanted.

This time she initiated the kiss and the voices telling them just how wrong it was faded.

She lay in bed with him hours later, the sheets tangled around their naked bodies, the stench of sex and lies in the air.

It wasn't how she thought it'd be.

She thought there'd be some sort of great revelation, that'd she have an epiphany and every thing would suddenly make sense. She was wrong. She was no less confused then before. She supposed she should feel guilty. She supposed she should feel ashamed. But all she felt was... tired.

…I don't know… minor revisions made… still not too thrilled but It'll do for now…