The Paper Bag
Accursed Kin!
Disclaimer: I don't own Lord of the Rings. Nor do I own Plot bunnies, which belong solely to SkyFire. She's funny. But don't try to take her plot bunnies without telling her. That's bad. It's stealing. And plot bunnies bite very hard.
Today's Plot bunny: Haldir receives a surprise birthday present from a dead Elf that had been walking in the woods near Weathertop.
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Haldir stood at the fringes of Lothlorien, massaging a stiff neck. He hated the early patrol. He hated the late patrol. He even hated the middle-of-the-day patrol. He especially hated it when he had to do all of them in a row.
Well! There was nothing to do for it now. He had approximately… five minutes before the patrol would be moving on.
A messenger-Elf ran up to him, identified by his green arm band and look of weariness written all over his normally Elven-fair face. "Package for Haldir, Captain of the Lothlorien guard," Said the tired Elf, waving a small envelope.
"That's me," Haldir said, accepting the envelope from the messenger. The other Elf stumbled in the other direction, yawning broadly.
Haldir investigated the package, and then dubiously opened it. Inside were three small stones, and a letter. He pulled out the letter first. It read:
Dear Haldie-Waldie!
This is your dear uncle Poppy! I've missed you, Haldie! I'm just passing by Weathertop now, and boy is the weather awful! Not only that, but some freak with a torch tried to burn me up! Only after I explained that I was not a black rider… whatever those are… did he apologize and pull the burning torch from my abdomen!
It's scarring horribly! But I'm okay!
Loves and hugs,
Your Dear Uncle Poppy.
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Haldir dropped the letter with a yelp. Then, after a few minutes, he ventured to pick it up again. That COULDN'T be his uncle Poppy… not only was his Uncle Poppy DEAD, he was too incredibly stupid to write.
Haldir investigated the rocks in the package. Maybe they would hold some clue to who sent the mystery package.
They were, much to his surprise, and dismay, the very same type of rocks that his Uncle Poppy used to collect.
Perhaps a coincidence. Poppy did not collect very special rocks. He found pebbles, and declared them rare, and kept them.
Just then, a dead Elf came walking up to him. Despite the fact that he was quite remarkably decomposed, he resembled Haldir's Uncle Poppy down to the last little (though decomposed) detail. "Hi, Haldie-Waldie! I bet you didn't expect me to come for a visit! I brought some board games! We can play for hours! Haldie? Haldie? Where are you going?"
Haldir ran away into the woods.
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Oboebyrd: Funny if you like Haldir a lot, which I do… unnatural, no? Ah well. Once again, visit Skyfire's site at http://www.geocities.com/rabid_plotbunny/