Disclaimer: see part 1
Chain of Command
Part 8
Relent
By Random1377
"Hand me my uniform."
Shinji looked up from the report he was reading, "Hmm?"
"I said hand me my uniform," Asuka repeated, leaning out of the bathroom, "I've got to get ready, honey…"
He sighed, nodding as he stood up from the couch.
Walking to the bedroom, he frowned. –I don't know if I can watch her put this on…- he thought grimly.
He picked up the uniform with some distaste. It had been a shock to him to see Rei wear it the first time, but he had gotten used to that.
Now… his lover was going to wear it.
"Here…" he whispered, holding the garment out to her, "Commander…"
She took it with almost as much reluctance as he offered it. "I don't want to do this…" she whispered, staring at the black coat and pants, "God, I really don't want to do this…"
"I know, honey…" he said gently, "and I don't want you too…"
She sighed, "Out in a sec…"
As the door swung closed, he started for the living room. "Take your time…" he mumbled to himself, "I'm in no rush…"
Before he could sit back down, the phone rang.
"Ikari," he said absently, his mind still pondering the thought of Asuka dressed as the commander of NERV.
"Shinji," the voice on the other end of the line derailed his train of thought, "it's me… I need to talk to you…"
"Now?" he whispered, looking at the bathroom door, "this isn't a good time…"
"Tonight?" the woman replied, "I… it has to be soon, Shinji…"
He took a deep breath, "Seven o'clock…" he said, willing the woman to hang up, "I'll be home alone then…"
"Seven…" the voice replied hesitantly, "ok, I'll be there…"
He hung up just as Asuka opened the bathroom door, "Who was that?" she inquired, straightening her coat.
"David," Shinji replied, "wanted to know if I was free tonight…"
"Isn't he on shift?" Asuka asked, frowning slightly.
"Yeah," Shinji answered, cursing himself for choosing the wrong person, "but he wanted to know if I could feed his dog."
"Oh," the redhead replied, relaxing slightly, "how do I look?"
He looked her up and down, then looked away. "Like the Commander…" he said quietly.
Asuka looked at the clock, then back to Shinji's face, chewing her bottom lip thoughtfully.
After a moment, she said, "If it bothers you that much, honey… take it off me…"
He blinked and looked up at her, "Huh?"
"I've got a little time," she whispered, smiling seductively, "if the uniform bothers you so much… why don't you take it off of me?"
He smiled as she headed for the bedroom, looking back over her shoulder expectantly as she reached the door. "Is that an order?" he asked.
"You're damn right," she said softly, "but you'd better hurry… I can't be late my first day."
He nodded, "Aye aye, Ma'am!" he said, saluting her smartly.
As he headed towards her, Asuka turned away, smiling sadly. –Stay mine…- she thought, closing her eyes as his hands came around her, seeking the buttons on the black outfit, -stay mine forever, Shinji… don't leave me… please…-
Several moments later, the uniform lay on the floor… mute witness to the urgent coupling that took place less than five feet from where it had been discarded.
**
Misato looked up as Asuka came onto the bridge.
"Commander on deck!" she called out.
"Thank you, Major," Asuka said, heading for the assembled pilots.
Misato nodded and fell in at her side. "How's Shinji?" she asked softly, grinning as the younger women nearly stumbled.
"Oh shut up," the redhead grumbled, "I'm on time…"
Misato said nothing… but her smile spoke volumes.
"Good morning," Asuka said, coming to a halt in front of the group, "protocol requires that a newly appointed Commander address the pilots… so here we are." She took a deep breath, "I'll make it brief, since we all have things to do-"
"Like Ikari," Mira whispered, smirking as the Second Child stopped in mid-sentence.
-Already?- Asuka thought, -I didn't think I would get a chance like this until later.- "Pilot LeBeau," she said, caught halfway between relief and frustration, "step forward."
As Commander, she knew she could not have anyone question her, so she would need to show her strength. On the one hand, it was nice to get it out of the way immediately… on the other hand, it would have to be done with care, lest she should alienate all of the pilots.
"Yes, Commander?" Mira asked, stepping forward.
Asuka noted that the French girl was still smirking.
"Let's get this out of the way," she said quietly, speaking to Mira alone, "you don't like me, I don't like you… everyone knows it…"
"I don't know what you mean, Commander," Mira replied sweetly, "I don't dislike-"
"Shut… up…" Asuka whispered, leaning close to the woman, "I will not tolerate insubordination."
"Oh, you're so tough, Souryu," the French woman replied, "just because the real Commander made a bad choice, you think you're all high and-"
"Think carefully before you finish that sentence," Asuka whispered, smiling softly, "I'll say it again, LeBeau… I don't give a good goddamn if you like me or not – my job isn't to be liked by you."
"Is there a point to all this?" Mira said, looking bored, "Or are you just going to establish how much I don't like you?"
"The point?" Asuka said, dropping her voice even lower, "The point, LeBeau, is that I'm not the only one paying attention to what you say and do…"
Mira blinked, casting her eyes around at the assembled pilots… and Misato, and Hines, and all the bridge crew. She swallowed, feeling suddenly very self-conscious, but said nothing.
"You're sync-ratio is decent," Asuka pressed on, "but nothing compared to Klashnikov or Yamato…" she smiled, showing the girl all of her teeth, "and there are other pilot candidates…"
"You wouldn't…" Mira whispered, horrified, "I'm a Child, I'm-"
"Replaceable…" the redhead cut her off briskly, "out of all the pilots, only Shinji can't be replaced."
This was true. For reasons Maya still could not quite explain, Unit 01 would accept no one but the Third Child.
Mira lowered her eyes, her face going rather pale.
"I don't care what you think of me," Asuka concluded, "but so long as I wear this jacket, you will respect me. Do we have an understanding?"
"Yes… Commander…" Mira replied, standing stiffly at attention and staring straight ahead.
"Good… now step back in line, please…" as the French woman did what she was told, Asuka surveyed the pilots, "as I was saying, I don't have anything to add to the orders Ayanami has standing."
She turned to Hines, whispering something quietly, then thanking him as he handed her a sheet of paper.
"The only change to the duty rosters is as follows," she said, making a notation on the paper, "Guteriez, you are now third watch, and LeBeau will take first, since her scores on the last procedure drill were highest." She suppressed a smile as the French woman thanked her, "That is all. You are dismissed."
As the pilots dispersed, Misato nodded. "Well done," she said approvingly, "dress the girl down, then make her thank you for giving her the choice assignment… showing her – and everyone else – that you won't take her shit… but you'll still treat her fairly."
Asuka shrugged. "She knew what I was doing… not that I care, but she's not going to go out of her way for me."
"No," Misato conceded, "but I'll bet she'll show you some respect… at least in front of the others."
Asuka nodded and headed for the command dais. "I just want to get through this…" she said softly, "if Wondergirl hadn't gone and gotten hurt… ooo!! I could just strangle her!"
"Easy…" Misato said soothingly, "it's not like she did it on purpose… and it's just for a little while."
"I know," Asuka sighed, "but I won't get to be with Shinji…"
The purple-haired woman considered this for a moment, wondering if she should ask the younger woman why she was so possessive all of the sudden.
Really, Shinji should have been there for the address… but it wasn't exactly a secret whose bed he shared, and no one really wanted to make an issue out of it. He would be kept up to speed.
"Anything you need, Commander?" Misato said, finally deciding that the redhead had enough on her mind without her prying into her personal affairs.
"Yeah, actually," Asuka said after a moment, "get me the video files of the last two angel attacks. I want to study them."
Misato nodded, smiling faintly, "Looking to kill some time?"
Asuka snorted, "Yeah… that's it. No, I just want to see how we could have fought better… both fights were sloppy."
The Operations Director's smile widened, "How very Commander-like of you."
"Oh shut up…" Asuka said tiredly.
Misato bowed, "Yes, Commander…"
Before Asuka could reply (or throw anything) the purple-haired woman departed, smiling as she thought that Rei had definitely made the right choice.
**
"Commander? Are you awake?" Maya opened the door slowly, peering in.
"I am, Misses Ibuki," Rei replied, "but I am not the Commander."
The brown-haired woman smiled. "You're still Commander," she said, stepping into the room, "even if you're off for a little while." She took a seat by the red-eyed girl's bedside, "And what I have is only for your eyes."
Rei sighed, "Understood…" she said, taking the plain, manila envelope the woman offered her, "these are the test results?"
Maya nodded, "Yes… the prototype has been fitted to Unit 11, and the pilot has been trained in its use."
"He understands it is still in the test-stage, correct?" the blue-haired girl asked, leafing through the report.
"He does," Maya confirmed, "and as you can see, we have had three successful tests."
"But never in a combat scenario," Rei pointed out, closing the folder, "and there have been several failures."
"Well, yes," the brown-haired tech admitted, "but I believe that the unit is stable. Sempai designed it very well… I just wish she had gotten to see it in action."
"You… miss her…" the younger woman said gently, handing the folder back.
"I do…" Maya said softly, "I looked up to her… I respected her… I might have even loved her, somehow…"
"It is… unfortunate that she chose the route that she did…" Rei said, "she was a very talented scientist."
"I was her understudy," the brown-haired woman pointed out, meeting Rei's eyes, "I still feel like I need to apologize for her actions, some days…"
"You could not have known," Rei replied, "no one foresaw her actions… or her suicide…"
Maya nodded reluctantly, "Maybe… but if I had known, maybe you would still…" she didn't quite know how to finish.
And truly, there was not much to say. How do you apologize for another person's actions… when the nature of the crime (and the one it was perpetrated against) was so unusual?
"It is a good thing, I believe," Rei said after a moment of reflection, "in an odd way – it was a gift."
"I don't think that's how she meant it," Maya said sadly, "when she pushed that button… destroying… all of them, I don't think she wanted you to feel good about it."
"Perhaps not," the blue-haired girl acknowledged, "but as a result, I have more respect for life… my own, especially…"
"What was it like?" the older woman asked suddenly, leaning forward with an intense look on her face, "To know you could never die?"
Rei pondered this for a moment, then shook her head. "Terrible…" she whispered, "my life meant nothing. I knew that I could be replaced, so I did not bother with things like personal safety… or making friends… or striving to better myself. What was the point? Any time, I could be killed, and another would take my place – remembering only what the Commander chose to allow it to remember…"
She looked away, "Nothing that made me me would have survived," she said softly, "it was a living purgatory." She turned back to Maya, smiling softly, "I am sure that you did not want to know that much, Misses Ibuki… but now perhaps you can understand why, when I think of Doctor Akagi, I don't think of the woman that destroyed the dummy plug system and the other bodies… I think of the woman that set me free…"
Maya nodded thoughtful, thinking that she understood the enigmatic girl much better now. "Thank you for sharing that with me," she said quietly, "it can't have been easy to tell me that."
Rei shrugged. "No one has asked me how I felt about her before," she said, "and I do not mind talking about myself anymore…"
"I'm glad," Maya said, smiling gently, "I need to go finish the installation of the unit, but I would like to talk to you some more later… if you don't mind."
"You would?" the blue-haired girl asked softly, "Are there more tests to review?"
"No," the older woman said, smiling gently, "I just want to talk to you."
Rei considered this for a moment, then nodded. "I would… like that."
"That is," Maya said with a grin, "if I can get past your guard dog."
The blue-haired girl frowned for a moment, not understanding, then smiled gently. "Mister Aida is very dedicated to his job," she said softly, unable to meet the other woman's eyes, "he does not leave his post except to sleep… and I believe he is not sleeping much."
"Why doesn't he come inside?" Maya inquired, "It would be a whole lot more comfortable for both of you to have someone to talk to."
Rei blushed slightly, twisting at her bed sheets. "He does not think it would be… appropriate," she said softly.
The brown-haired tech smiled (she knew how the young Section Two agent felt for his superior – even a blind man could see that) and answered, "Well, I'll tell him you're resting comfortably."
Rei nodded and leaned back as the older woman left, closing her eyes.
As Maya passed Kensuke, she paused. "Commander Ayanami wants to see you," she said, suppressing a smile, "you'd better see what she needs."
Kensuke blinked, then nodded. "Yes, Ma'am," he said, unable to hide the faint smile that appeared on his lips.
As he opened the door, Maya walked away, humming quietly to herself.
-Children…- she thought with a smile, -what would they do without us older folks around to give them these little pushes?-
**
Shinji stood pacing back and forth in the hallway leading to the front of the apartment.
It was ten to seven.
She would be there soon.
-How can I talk to her?- he thought, folding his arms over his chest as he walked, -It's awkward enough every time I see her… I can't keep going on like this, wondering what she wants…-
His head came up as the doorbell rang, and he took a deep breath.
"Hello, Shinji…"
He smiled at her. "Hello… Hikari."
Hikari looked around surreptitiously, "Can I… come in?" she asked quietly, "I don't want anyone to see me standing here…"
Who would see her, Shinji didn't know, but he nodded and stepped out of her way, leading her into the kitchen. "What did you need to talk to me about?" he asked, forcing his voice to stay light.
"You know," she said, unable to meet his eyes, "don't make me say it…"
He nodded. "Yeah…" he admitted, "I kinda thought you would want to-"
"It can't ever happen again, Shinji…" she said, her voice shaking as she cut him off, "it shouldn't have happened in the first place…"
He nodded, feeling relieved, "I know…" he said softly, putting his arms around her, "and you're right…"
She tensed as he held her, then relaxed against him "And Touji can't ever know…" she whispered, "he's… not as strong as people think, Shinji… it would hurt him."
"Neither is Asuka," Shinji replied, "it's best if no one knows… agreed?"
She nodded quickly. "Thank you, Shinji…" she said after a moment, "I'm sorry I got us into this…"
"It's ok," he said gently, holding her close to him, "I was there too…"
"Yes," she said, "but you didn't want to, and I made you, and I-"
"Shhh…" he cut her off, "I didn't do anything I didn't want to do…"
She blushed, "Asuka's lucky," she said, stepping back.
"Touji's luckier," he answered sadly, "I think he got the better deal…"
Before she could ask what he meant, he gently took her by the elbow and led her towards the door.
As he opened it, he leaned forward, "Only you and I will ever know about this…" he whispered, almost softer than she could hear, "marry Touji and try to forget all about this. He's a good man, Hikari… let's put this behind us, ok?"
She took a deep, wavering breath and nodded. "Just you and me…" she whispered, smiling halfheartedly, "our secret…"
He smiled. –Too many secrets,- he thought, closing the door as the future Misses Suzuhara moved off down the hallway, -way too many…-
Sighing, Shinji rested his head against the door… deciding to forgo the partying that night –Who knows what I might start mumbling about?- he thought, -I'll just make dinner for Asuka… and go on pretending that everything is just fine…-
"Well…" he whispered, heading towards the kitchen, "maybe just one – to get me by…"
And for the first time in many months… he actually managed to hold to his one-drink limit.
Continued…
Reworked scene
This scene was changed, as I thought it was a little too graphic, and didn't quite fit the tone of the rest of the story. I've included the original here because I thought some people might be interested in knowing how it might have gone ((shrug))
Misato looked up as Asuka came onto the bridge.
"Commander on deck!" she called out.
"Thank you, Major," Asuka said, heading for the assembled pilots.
"A moment, Commander," Misato said quickly, approaching the girl.
"What is it?" the redhead asked, "I've got to get-"
"Shhh…" Misato whispered, reaching out, "you have… something on your cheek…"
Asuka flushed bright red as the purple-haired woman wiped the evidence of her recent activity away. "Thanks…" she said quietly.
"Don't mention it," Misato said, grimacing as she wiped her hand on a Kleenex, "to anyone… ever…"
Asuka nodded, flushing deeper, and headed to address the Children…
Author's notes: think you've got it all worked out? Well… you might, I'm not that subtle. ^_^ But hopefully, I've still got a couple surprises left…
How many different ways can I thank Ryoma for pre-reading this story?? Guess we'll see. ^_^ Thanks man.
Feedback is always welcome at random1377@yahoo.com