Duality
By Risa
Disclaimer: See Chapter 1
Author's Notes: Yes, this story is nearing the end. Hopefully you'll enjoy reading this part and that it answers some of your questions! Also, the idea of Belthazor's return came after reading the book Peril's Gate by Janny Wurts – one of my favourite fantasy authors. And finally, thanks to all the reviewers who have given me such great comments!
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Chapter Nine
"It worked. It actually worked," Paige said, stunned.
Phoebe quickly removed the crystals on the floor and flung her arms around Cole, "I was so afraid that I'd lose you…" she said. The whole time they were doing the spell they couldn't see find any sign to see if the spell was working or not. Phoebe had to force herself to push her worries and anxieties away and simply focus on the spell.
Cole held her tightly in his arms. "Don't worry, the Source's gone…" he said as he ran his fingers through her hair. He couldn't do it. He couldn't tell her. She looked so relieved and so happy, he didn't want to do anything to ruin that. Perhaps he could tell them about Belthazor later…
"Leo!" Piper called. "We did it," she said with a grin after Leo orbed into the attic.
"Welcome back to the human world," Leo said to Cole with a smile as he moved beside Piper and held her hand.
Cole looked at the happy and relieved faces around him. No, much as he hated to, he couldn't keep the truth from them again. He had done it before and the experience was one he didn't want to repeat. "Not quite," he said softly and seriously.
"What do you mean not quite?" Phoebe demanded, with a sense of dread. She should have known. It had all been way too easy for there not to be a catch somewhere.
Cole sighed. "Belthazor's back."
"What!" Phoebe shouted in shock as she pulled herself out of Cole's arms. "How could that be? I thought we got rid of him."
"Phoebe, calm down," Piper said. She was shocked as well, but she knew that there was more that Cole wanted to tell them.
Phoebe took a deep breath. "How?" she repeated.
Cole sighed and told them what Belthazor had told them. "I had no choice," he said bleakly, "if I didn't accept his offer, I might have lost out to the Source and he could have gotten control. He felt extremely powerful. I didn't know if you could vanquish him and I didn't want to take the risk." He paused, waiting somewhat apprehensively for a response.
"It's okay," Phoebe said as moved over to the Book and began to flip the pages, "We could just do the spell again…"
Cole walked over to her and pulled her hands away from the book, holding them tightly in his. "No, it wouldn't work. Belthazor said that vanquishing him was what got me into this mess in the first place. He's a part of me, Phoebe. I have to accept that, and so do you."
Phoebe sighed as she sat down on the attic step, defeated. Piper motioned for the others to follow her out of the room to allow the two of them some privacy. Cole sat down beside her. "Is it really so bad?" he said softly. "We've just gone back to what it was like before I became human."
Phoebe shook her head. "It's different. For the past few months, you've been human. No more dodging from bounty hunters, no more worries that you'll turn evil. It isn't so easy to go back to what it was like before."
She saw the look of hurt pass over Cole's face which he tried to hide. "It doesn't mean that I no longer love you or want to marry you," she leaned her head against his shoulder and drew vague designs on the back of Cole's hands. "I do," she said, sighing. "But it wouldn't be as easy as before."
Cole wrapped one arm around Phoebe's shoulder and pulled her closer. Despite the hint of reserve in Phoebe's words, he was still relieved that she still accepted him for what he was. "I know," he said, "for one, I don't know how your sisters would take it, or the Elders."
"True," Phoebe said, "but I'm not so concerned about them. I love you, Cole Turner, and human or half-human, I'm taking what I can get. But how are you dealing with it?"
"Me?" Cole said, surprised. "I'm fine, I've had to live with Belthazor for the past hundred years or so, the past few months were more the exception than the rule." Then he confessed, "You accepted this much better than I expected."
Phoebe laughed. "Not really," she said, "true, Belthazor's back, but he was there before and I loved you all the same. You're still good."
Cole smiled as he softly kissed Phoebe on the lips. "I love you," he said, when he pulled away.
"You'd better," Phoebe said, grinning, "or I'll come after you with a sword and I promise it won't be pretty. After all, I was taught by the best."
Downstairs, Paige, Piper, Leo and Fortuna were waiting restlessly in the living room. Darien had left with the witches, saying that he needed to check in with Circle Daybreak.
"No sounds of fighting or screaming," Paige observed, "I think they should be okay."
Piper sighed, "I hope so. It's strange having Belthazor back, but I guess it's not much different from before."
"Are you sure we can trust Cole now that he's back?" Paige said, "Shouldn't we be more careful?"
"He helped us before when he was still a half-demon," Piper pointed out, "it's not as different as it was before."
"But how do we know that he's not making all this up?" Paige argued, "How do we know that he wouldn't become evil again?"
"If he was going to become evil again, then he needn't have told us about Belthazor's return, would he?" Piper said.
"I think we should be careful around Cole for a while," Leo said. Piper looked at him in surprise. "It's not that I'm suspicious of Cole," Leo said quickly, "it's just that we don't know what his evil half has up his sleeve. Cole might not have as much control over him as we think."
"You don't have to worry, whitelighter," Zimei said as she appeared in the room, "The terms of the agreement will hold. Cole wouldn't become evil again."
"Where were you?" Fortuna said irritably.
"I was helping Leo distract the Elders," Zimei replied innocently. "He wouldn't have been able to do it alone."
Leo glared at Zimei. "So you were the one who were sending the imps after all the witches."
"Imps?" Paige said blankly.
"Someone was sending imps after all the new witches to pester them. They aren't deadly, but they can be a real menace. And they're difficult to catch. These witches aren't familiar enough with their powers to find them and get rid of them. The Elders were busy summoning all the free whitelighters to help expel the imps. They can't kill the witches directly, but they could do something that might cause someone to die or get hurt."
Piper and Paige looked at Zimei in shock. Fortuna just sighed.
"They wouldn't have done anything dangerous," Zimei protested, "I threatened them not to. Besides," she smiled sweetly, "I knew you lot will be able to handle it."
Leo glared at Zimei. "Even then…"
Piper interrupted Leo. "Zimei, could you please not do that again? And are you sure those imps didn't do any permanent damage?"
"No, they didn't," Zimei said, "and if they did, I've already made up for it. And yes, I won't do it again." She grinned mischievously and said, "After all, one shouldn't reuse the same tactics."
Piper sighed. Zimei's methods were a little… underhanded but there again, she had told them before that she didn't work for good. There was nothing Piper could do and since there wasn't any serious damage, they just had to let it go. She decided to change the topic. "Why are you so certain that Cole wouldn't become evil?"
"You just have to trust me on this," Zimei said, her voice becoming serious, "What Cole told you is true. Cole's demonic half is under control, or I'll be able to tell. All of us who have to serve the Balance have been taught how to tell if someone's good or evil. And the radar says that Cole's not evil."
Fortuna nodded in agreement. She looked at Zimei suspiciously for a while before saying, "Zimei, could I talk to you in private?" She glanced at the others, asking the same question. They nodded.
Fortuna pulled the ghost to the kitchen with her. "Did you have something to do with this?" she demanded.
"With what?" Zimei said, confused.
"With Cole getting his demonic half back," Fortuna said exasperatedly. "What else could I be referring to?"
"Where did you get that idea?"
"You said before that Cole was supposed to work for us. Now, if he was half-demon, that would make him balanced between good and evil – just the right person. So, why shouldn't you have interfered?"
"Flattering as it is to have you think of me as being omnipotent," Zimei said dryly, "I didn't have anything to do with this. Think child, Belthazor and Cole are basically two sides of the same person. You can't just get rid of one side as easily as that. And why shouldn't Belthazor intervene? As I said, they're basically part of the same person, if one dies, so would the other."
Fortuna looked at Zimei apologetically, "I guess you're right." Then something occurred to her. "If that's the case, why didn't Cole die when Belthazor was vanquished?"
"You really need to get sharper," Zimei sighed. "The spell treated Cole and Belthazor as two separate entities. It thus had only enough power in it to vanquish half of Cole. And since when could you vanquish just half a person?"
"So what it did was just separate the two of them, which was what left Cole vulnerable to possession by the Source," Fortuna said slowly.
Zimei nodded. "As for Cole working for us, he probably wouldn't for a long time. Phoebe's on the side of good, remember? Working for the Balance might require him to go against good, and it will be difficult for him to do that." She smiled sadly. "You've been lucky Fortuna. Ours can be a rather lonely road. Let Cole enjoy what he has."
"Compassion, Zimei?" Fortuna said in mock shock, but there was a gentle smile on her face.
"I'm getting soft," Zimei said with a grin.
"C'mon then softie, let's get back outside."
Late that night, Cole found himself lying in bed, unable to sleep. He felt uneasy. Despite what he told Phoebe, he actually felt different from the days when he was a half-demon. Within him, he felt as if there were two distinct, separate beings, something which he never felt before. There seemed to be no explanation for it. But Cole was also worried. Did this mean that he had less control over the evil within him than he had before?
He got out of bed quietly and carefully, not wanting to disturb Phoebe who was still sleeping soundly. He decided that he needed to just walk around for a while, to work out the nervous energy racing around him. He had reached the living room when he heard a voice behind him.
"Can't sleep?"
He turned to see Zimei standing behind him. The darkness of the house made the light surrounding her more obvious. "What are you doing here this late?" he asked.
"Just checking on my niece," Zimei said, "she overstretched herself today, and is just beginning to feel the effects. If I don't do something, she's going to have a massive headache tomorrow. So why are you still up?"
"I just couldn't sleep," Cole said.
"It's about re-joining with Belthazor, isn't it?" Zimei said.
Cole sighed. "It's strange. I feel as if there are two people inside of me – myself and Belthazor. The Belthazor half isn't doing anything at the moment but I just have this feeling that it isn't going to last."
"You know what your problem is?" Zimei said. "You're treating your human and demon halves as two entirely separate entities. They aren't. It's only when you accept Belthazor as part of yourself – which you did before – will you have control over him. Otherwise, you'll probably go mad."
"I have accepted him – "
"No, you haven't," she interrupted. "You have accepted him back into your body, yes. But you're still distancing yourself from your evil half. If you regard your demonic half as a separate being, then that's what's going to happen. Then you'll either go mad or lose control."
"So what you're saying is that I've got to assimilate my demonic half into my human half?"
Zimei nodded. "That's the problem with the spell that Phoebe did to get rid of your demonic half. It made you think that he was something entirely separate."
"All right, let's try it." He closed his eyes and focused himself inward, following Zimei's instructions. After a long while, he opened his eyes in surprise. "It worked," he said. He felt a sort of balance within. Belthazor was simply the evil aspect of himself, just a slightly more intensified version of the evil that was within all humans. Something that he had control over and something that could grow weaker with time. "Thanks," he told Zimei.
"No charge," she said, grinning.
"I wanted to ask you this before, but we just didn't have the time. What happened after we got rid of the organisation? How did you die?" Cole asked.
"I never told you this before but my soulmate was like Darien, a lamia. I had actually been sent to kill his family – you do remember that I was an assassin?"
Cole nodded. Zimei had told him that story before, about how people from the side of good had killed her family so that they couldn't interfere against them. She had been left at the doorstep of the headquarters of an assassin guild and had been brought up by them. It was not until her teens that she found out about the Balance.
"Well, that's how we met actually. I was trying to get an opening into their household when I met him. I didn't realise he was my soulmate until later. But I still had to do what I came to do – to repay the debt I owed the person who hired me. Not long, before we were supposed to be married, I made an excuse to carry out what I was supposed to do with you. After that, I came back and I decided that I couldn't marry him. I had betrayed him. I decided to just complete what I came to do and leave. But they found me out." She paused, taking a deep breath.
"Anyway, even after knowing what I had done, he still tried to help me escape. I refused to because I know that he would suffer the consequences if I did. I killed myself in the end so that he would escape any implication." The expression on Zimei's face was one of pain and sadness.
Cole didn't know what to say just then. This was the last thing he expected. His heart went out to Zimei in sympathy. He had gone through something similar to that with Phoebe and he knew that under the same circumstances, he would have done the same thing.
"Anyway, that was a long time ago," Zimei said, forcing the memories to the back of her mind. "You'd better get some sleep."
Cole nodded. "I'm sure you'll see him again someday," he said.
"I hope so," Zimei said sighing, before she vanished as silently as she had appeared.
"Do you guys have to leave so soon?" Phoebe said, as she showed Fortuna and Darien to the door.
Fortuna nodded. "We've still got things to do back at home. But once that's done, we'll be able to come visit," she said, grinning. "You won't get rid of us so easily."
"Hopefully things would be a lot calmer next time," Phoebe said wryly. "Thank you for everything," she added softly.
"We were just doing what we were supposed to do," Fortuna said. "You guys take care all right?"
Phoebe nodded and smiled. As she watched the two of them leave, she felt a sense of peace and calm. The threat of the Source was now gone and their lives could finally assume something close to normality. She looked out at the bright morning sun and knew that it was going to be a beautiful day.