Disclaimer: If I was J. K. Rowling I would be too busy writing Harry Potter
and the Order of Phoenix, among other things, to write this.
A/N: Parvati and someone. Who is someone? Don't ask me (not that you did), I'm just as clueless as you are. So is everyone else. So it's up to me to find out who it is! Even as I type this I actually don't know who it'll be; I'm going to make it up as I go along.
Parvati and Someone
Parvati
Me: Hi! How are you? I haven't seen you for ages!
Parvati: I remember you! You insulted Padma.
Me: Did I do that? It must have been MY twin sister.
Parvati: I'm not stupid.
Me: Well, you're definitely dumber than Padma if you're in Gryffindor and she's in Ravenclaw.
Parvati: Shut up!
Me: Did I say that out loud? Let's talk about something else. Is it true that you've got a new boyfriend?
Parvati: I'm not talking to you.
Me: You actually ARE talking to me. So, since you're talking to me I really need to know who you're going out with because Voldemort is disguised as a certain student and I'm afraid this person might be that person. I can't tell you who this person is because, of course, you'll all avoid him and he'll notice that everyone knows.
Parvati: You're lying.
Me: How did you know? I'm a good liar! There's only one person who can tell when I'm lying and even she doesn't always know. Was my lie that unbelievable? (A/N: That's actually true. I don't know how Josephine knows. I've asked her and she just says "I don't know".)
Parvati: It seems that I'm smarter than you thought!
Me: Yeah, whatever. You're not the only person at Hogwarts that I can ask.
Lavender
Lavender: Does she have a boyfriend? She never told me. How did you find out.
Me: Nisha told me.
Lavender: Is she Parvati's friend?
Me: I don't know. Can you ask Parvati who it is?
Lavender: Why would she want you to know?
Me: We're good friends.
Lavender: Then why can't you ask her?
Hermione
Me: Have you noticed Parvati with any guys?
Hermione: Dean, Seamus, Neville, Ron and Harry mostly.
Me: No one else? So you think she might be going out with one of them?
Hermione: Maybe Dean.
Me: Thanks Hermione.
Dean
Dean: Parvati? No. I wish!
Me: Are you sure?
Dean: I think I'd know.
I wondered what to do. Then I saw Dumbledore. He knew everything that happed at Hogwarts! I'd ask him.
Dumbledore
Dumbledore: That's Parvati's own business.
Me: But I'm just curious.
Dumbledore: Curiosity killed the cat.
Me: I'm not a cat.
Dumbledore: I didn't say you were. I jus don't want to tell you.
Me: Do you know who it is?
Dumbledore: Actually I don't. That's why I don't want to tell you.
Padma
Me: Has Parvati told you who her new boyfriend is?
Padma: No. I didn't even know she had one.
Me: There's only one person it could be if she hasn't told anyone: Neville.
Neville
Me: what were you doing in the girls' dorm just now?
Neville: I wasn't in the girls' dorm. This is the boys' dorm.
Me: Then…that can't be right!
Neville: But it is. I've come to this school for over four years now.
Me: Is there a map?
Neville: No.
Me: Anyway, how well do you know Parvati?
Neville: Not very well. I know she doesn't like me.
Me: Are you sure? What about you, do YOU like her?
Neville: She's not very likable.
Me: That's true. You wouldn't consider being her friend?
Neville: She wouldn't consider being my friend.
Me: Okay. So which way out of here?
Neville: The way you came in.
Me: I knew that.
As I walked out, I noticed crumbs going from what I assumed was the girls' dorm, to the portrait. And they weren't just any crumbs they were Doritos! Whether this was Parvati's boyfriend or not, I had to find him or her.
I followed the crumbs all the way to the Slytherin tower. They stopped just outside. I broke into the common room and hoped no one would notice the damage I had caused.
They continued all the way up to the fifth year boys room and stopped when they came to a bed. I asked whose bed it was. They asked why I was there. I said I had to make sure they dorms were clean and if they weren't I had to make sure whoever caused the mess, cleaned it up. They told me it was Malfoy's bed. I asked where he was and they said "he went somewhere".
Then I realised the trail had started from the Slytherin tower and ended up in the Gryffindor tower. I went back to Gryffindor and went into the girls' dorm and bumped into Malfoy. His bag of Doritos was empty.
Malfoy
Me: HOW CAN YOU WASTE DORITOS? YOU SHOULD BE PUT IN AZKABAN! They're all over Hogwarts, all the way from Slytherin to here! Don't you realise how important it is not to waste Doritos? The muggles can only make so many before something goes wrong! This is worse than anything Voldemort could ever do.
Malfoy: They're just chips.
Me: (appalled) Just chips?
I fainted.
When I woke up I was in the Hospital Wing. Ginny and Malfoy were talking to Mme. Pomfrey.
Me: I'm okay!
Malfoy: It's all your fault. Now everyone's wondering why I was in Gryffindor tower.
Me: Why were you in Gryffindor tower?
Malfoy: Because of Ginny.
Me: Oh. I thought you might have been there for Parvati.
Seamus
Seamus: I have no idea.
Me: Do you know who might know?
Seamus: No.
Me: That's helpful.
Colin Creevy
Me: Don't ask me why I'm asking you but, do you know who Parvati's going out with?
Colin: Why are you asking me?
Me: I told you not to ask me.
Colin: I barely know who she is except that she went to the Yule Ball with Harry Potter!
Me: Yes, you would notice that, wouldn't you?
Hermione
Hermione: What's Krum doing at Hogwarts?
Me: I don't know or care.
Hermione: He's with Parvati!
Me: IS HE?
Hermione: How did that happen? They didn't know each other. She probably only likes him because he's famous.
Krum: Hello Parffati.
Hermione: (laughing) He can't pronounce her name either!
Me: A happy ending for everyone. (Sees Malfoy walking past with trail of Doritos behind him) Well almost everyone. (Runs after him yelling)
A/N: That was actually pretty good compared to the last chapter. In case you haven't noticed, I LOVE DORITOS! The next one is McGonagall with Snape or Dumbledore (I haven't decided yet). I don't know what the chapter after that is, but you might, so tell me in a review.
A/N: Parvati and someone. Who is someone? Don't ask me (not that you did), I'm just as clueless as you are. So is everyone else. So it's up to me to find out who it is! Even as I type this I actually don't know who it'll be; I'm going to make it up as I go along.
Parvati and Someone
Parvati
Me: Hi! How are you? I haven't seen you for ages!
Parvati: I remember you! You insulted Padma.
Me: Did I do that? It must have been MY twin sister.
Parvati: I'm not stupid.
Me: Well, you're definitely dumber than Padma if you're in Gryffindor and she's in Ravenclaw.
Parvati: Shut up!
Me: Did I say that out loud? Let's talk about something else. Is it true that you've got a new boyfriend?
Parvati: I'm not talking to you.
Me: You actually ARE talking to me. So, since you're talking to me I really need to know who you're going out with because Voldemort is disguised as a certain student and I'm afraid this person might be that person. I can't tell you who this person is because, of course, you'll all avoid him and he'll notice that everyone knows.
Parvati: You're lying.
Me: How did you know? I'm a good liar! There's only one person who can tell when I'm lying and even she doesn't always know. Was my lie that unbelievable? (A/N: That's actually true. I don't know how Josephine knows. I've asked her and she just says "I don't know".)
Parvati: It seems that I'm smarter than you thought!
Me: Yeah, whatever. You're not the only person at Hogwarts that I can ask.
Lavender
Lavender: Does she have a boyfriend? She never told me. How did you find out.
Me: Nisha told me.
Lavender: Is she Parvati's friend?
Me: I don't know. Can you ask Parvati who it is?
Lavender: Why would she want you to know?
Me: We're good friends.
Lavender: Then why can't you ask her?
Hermione
Me: Have you noticed Parvati with any guys?
Hermione: Dean, Seamus, Neville, Ron and Harry mostly.
Me: No one else? So you think she might be going out with one of them?
Hermione: Maybe Dean.
Me: Thanks Hermione.
Dean
Dean: Parvati? No. I wish!
Me: Are you sure?
Dean: I think I'd know.
I wondered what to do. Then I saw Dumbledore. He knew everything that happed at Hogwarts! I'd ask him.
Dumbledore
Dumbledore: That's Parvati's own business.
Me: But I'm just curious.
Dumbledore: Curiosity killed the cat.
Me: I'm not a cat.
Dumbledore: I didn't say you were. I jus don't want to tell you.
Me: Do you know who it is?
Dumbledore: Actually I don't. That's why I don't want to tell you.
Padma
Me: Has Parvati told you who her new boyfriend is?
Padma: No. I didn't even know she had one.
Me: There's only one person it could be if she hasn't told anyone: Neville.
Neville
Me: what were you doing in the girls' dorm just now?
Neville: I wasn't in the girls' dorm. This is the boys' dorm.
Me: Then…that can't be right!
Neville: But it is. I've come to this school for over four years now.
Me: Is there a map?
Neville: No.
Me: Anyway, how well do you know Parvati?
Neville: Not very well. I know she doesn't like me.
Me: Are you sure? What about you, do YOU like her?
Neville: She's not very likable.
Me: That's true. You wouldn't consider being her friend?
Neville: She wouldn't consider being my friend.
Me: Okay. So which way out of here?
Neville: The way you came in.
Me: I knew that.
As I walked out, I noticed crumbs going from what I assumed was the girls' dorm, to the portrait. And they weren't just any crumbs they were Doritos! Whether this was Parvati's boyfriend or not, I had to find him or her.
I followed the crumbs all the way to the Slytherin tower. They stopped just outside. I broke into the common room and hoped no one would notice the damage I had caused.
They continued all the way up to the fifth year boys room and stopped when they came to a bed. I asked whose bed it was. They asked why I was there. I said I had to make sure they dorms were clean and if they weren't I had to make sure whoever caused the mess, cleaned it up. They told me it was Malfoy's bed. I asked where he was and they said "he went somewhere".
Then I realised the trail had started from the Slytherin tower and ended up in the Gryffindor tower. I went back to Gryffindor and went into the girls' dorm and bumped into Malfoy. His bag of Doritos was empty.
Malfoy
Me: HOW CAN YOU WASTE DORITOS? YOU SHOULD BE PUT IN AZKABAN! They're all over Hogwarts, all the way from Slytherin to here! Don't you realise how important it is not to waste Doritos? The muggles can only make so many before something goes wrong! This is worse than anything Voldemort could ever do.
Malfoy: They're just chips.
Me: (appalled) Just chips?
I fainted.
When I woke up I was in the Hospital Wing. Ginny and Malfoy were talking to Mme. Pomfrey.
Me: I'm okay!
Malfoy: It's all your fault. Now everyone's wondering why I was in Gryffindor tower.
Me: Why were you in Gryffindor tower?
Malfoy: Because of Ginny.
Me: Oh. I thought you might have been there for Parvati.
Seamus
Seamus: I have no idea.
Me: Do you know who might know?
Seamus: No.
Me: That's helpful.
Colin Creevy
Me: Don't ask me why I'm asking you but, do you know who Parvati's going out with?
Colin: Why are you asking me?
Me: I told you not to ask me.
Colin: I barely know who she is except that she went to the Yule Ball with Harry Potter!
Me: Yes, you would notice that, wouldn't you?
Hermione
Hermione: What's Krum doing at Hogwarts?
Me: I don't know or care.
Hermione: He's with Parvati!
Me: IS HE?
Hermione: How did that happen? They didn't know each other. She probably only likes him because he's famous.
Krum: Hello Parffati.
Hermione: (laughing) He can't pronounce her name either!
Me: A happy ending for everyone. (Sees Malfoy walking past with trail of Doritos behind him) Well almost everyone. (Runs after him yelling)
A/N: That was actually pretty good compared to the last chapter. In case you haven't noticed, I LOVE DORITOS! The next one is McGonagall with Snape or Dumbledore (I haven't decided yet). I don't know what the chapter after that is, but you might, so tell me in a review.