Why I am on an apparent songfic binge at the moment, I do not know. Good luck figuring it out. Guess I've gotta take my slash-goggles off and stop seeing every bit of written and recorded media as slashable! :P

Introspective Pietro angst fic -- Pie-Pie misses his daddy! Aww! :D Major father issues. And implied slash -- you know the drill. Lance/Pietro slashy goodness. Wheee! XD Just to warn you, I wrote this on a whim in the middle of the night. No promises on quality. Also, this takes place in the same AU as "Bittersweet" although you do not have to be familiar with the story to understand it... yadda yadda yadda... ^_^

Disclaimer: I don't own X-Men: Evolution... it's the other way around! Uh, I mean, um... ::shifty eyes:: never mind. -_- Aaand, I do not own the song. (Duh...?) It is from Yentl, and I snagged the lyrics from a Charlotte Church CD because I couldn't find my Yentl one... Woo. XD


Papa, Can You Hear Me?





"Father." A curt nod.

May the light

Illuminate the night, the way your spirit

Illuminates my soul

"Spirit? Hardly -- I'm sure you're out there, somewhere. You had one asteroid, why not another? Many more? For all I know, you could be creating another sanctuary for us all as we speak. `As we speak' -- that's a joke. No communication whatsoever. Why can you not see how badly I need to know that you're all right? How much I need to hear that I'm not an orphan, not really..."
 
Pietro pressed his forehead to the smudged, streaked windowpane, relishing the feel of the cool glass against his flushed skin. Talking to a person who isn't here, he reflected bitterly. It's a sign of genius, I swear, he consoled himself, a sardonic smirk playing upon his beautifully curving lips. His hair caught the hazy, unreal glow of the streetlight down the road, streaking slivery-gold highlights through his pale mane.

Papa, can you hear me?

Papa, can you see me?

Papa, can you find me in the night?

A small sigh. "Do you check in on me? On any of us? Would you bother? Or are you convinced that I have been trained well enough to keep myself out of harm's way? That would make sense, truthfully -- you trained us yourself. We are your prodigies. We should be able to care for ourselves on our own. But I don't have to -- I have Lance. Or did you already know that, somehow...?" Pietro blinked back the tears threatening to spill from his heavily lashed eyes.

Papa, are you near me?

Papa, can you hear me?

Papa, can you help me not be frightened?

"Yeah, I admit it -- I'm afraid. Afraid of what might happen; afraid of what might not happen. Either way, nothing's gonna be the same. I'm probably gonna be killed someday because of this mutation, but I'll live happily, or not-so-happily, until that time." Pietro hadn't intended to blurt out something quite so profound, but realized it was most likely true. "One day, when the presence of mutants are detected, they will come after us, in fear," Pietro babbled to the empty room, explaining this truth more for his own benefit than the benefit of any entity listening to his one-sided conversation. "I guess that's why you have the plans you do, hmm?"

Looking at the skies, I seem to see a million eyes

Which ones are yours?

Where are you now that yesterday has waved good-bye and closed its doors?

The night is so much darker; the wind is so much colder

The world I see is so much bigger now that I'm alone

"You are out there -- I know it. But I'd rather you be here, where we can see you; contact you. When you were backing us, I felt like we were sitting on top of the world. We were impenetrable. A fortress of sheer will and mastery of our respective crafts. Now, Xavier's little team of freaks has taken the lead, with no one to stop their progress. We need progress," Pietro was pacing now, his slim white hands clasped tightly behind his back. "We need your guidance! Hell, even Mystique was better'n nothing, which is what you've left us with. Thank God for that cash we were able to get," Pietro mumbled the last part, as if in fear of the Master of Magnetism, or Mystique, for that matter, actually being able to hear his words.

Papa, please forgive me

Try to understand me

Papa, don't you know I had no choice?

Can you hear me praying; anything I'm saying?

Even though the night is filled with voices...

"Soooo..." Pietro continued to the vacant room, rocking back on his heels in front of the windows again, "How do you like your future son-in-law? A real looker, huh? What am I saying -- there's no way you'd accept my relationship. You must not know, else you'd be tearing us apart... breaking me of my will yet again. But this time, I think I may just have to stand up to you, because I am quite happy with this part of my life, thank you. Call it ridiculous, childish emotion, a waste of time and energy, and immoral... as if what you do every day isn't. Immoral, that is. Plotting to turn the human race into the subservient species, to allow mutants to rule the earth, dominating everything. It's... bizarre. Although I could never say that to your face." God, I'm glad he's not really here to hear that one. I'd be executed on the spot.

I remember everything you taught me; every book we've ever read

And all the words in all the books

Will be to face what lies ahead

The trees are so much taller; and I feel so much smaller

The moon is twice as lonely

And the stars are half as bright

"I do recall all of your teachings; I wouldn't forget. You would not permit me to ever, ever forget. Drumming the lessons into my skull day in and day out, every single day. But I miss those sessions -- sessions here we could be together, just the two of us, and you would treat me like the son I'd never been. You had faith in me and my abilities, even then. Nothing is the same, yet, nothing is different. Odd." Pietro crossed his slender arms over his chest, shivering at the waves of cold emanating from the frosty glass. He saw the headlights of the Jeep turning into the drive, the falling snow lit up by the bright yellow beams.

Papa, how I love you

Papa, how I need you

Papa, how I miss you kissing me

Goodnight

"Yes, I truly do miss you. I hope you find it within yourself to forgive me my 'sins,' even if they are only sins in your eyes," Pietro finished as he heard the familiar jingle-click of keys rattling in the front door. Seconds later, a small body leaped into the front hallway and up the stairs, followed by a massive one, and then...

"Lance!" Pietro cried, sprinting to capture his beau in a warm embrace of greeting, giving the taller boy a quick kiss before swiping at the snow that had accumulated in his dark hair and liberating the bundles from his arms. "How was shopping?"

"The usual. Oh, but Freddy had a little incident involving the candy aisle and a mop bucket. Don't ask," the rock-tumbler advised, looking toward the kitchen with apprehension. Pietro nodded.

"Need help with the rest of the bags?" he inquired, already grabbing his coat from the rack by the door.

"Sure," Lance accepted gratefully, since the other two didn't seem to be planning on assisting any.

"Okay, I'll be right out," Pietro promised. He waited until Lance had gotten far enough down the driveway to render him deaf to Pietro's final parting words to his absent father, spoken with head bowed demurely in the relative silence of their deserted living room:

"Goodnight, papa."



* * * * *





Umm, yes. That was pretty pointless angst there. Which is annoying, because Pietro and his father issues always have an angsty purpose, but this really didn't. Feh. . Well, at least it had a leeeetle smidgen of slash at the end, cuz I wanted it to! And I can just do that, because I'm special. Nyah-nyah! :P

Review, if you'd like... nothing fancy required, although it is much appreciated. :D