ASTAROTH
After many grueling battles, Astaroth confronted Maxi.
The enemies stood in the raised ring. Astaroth was half-turned away and spoke without looking at Maxi.
"At last, I've found you again," the huge monster said with a voice that rumbled like an earthquake. "And I will have my vengeance."
"YOUR vengeance?" Maxi said incredulously. "What are you talking about? I'm the one who has vengeance issues with you, not the other way around."
"You're so wrong!" Astaroth yelled. "You don't know the pain you've put me through!"
Now Maxi was really confused. "Okay, this I GOTTA hear. Aside from a crack on the noggin with my 'chucks, how did I EVER cause a demon like you pain?"
"It started three years ago," Asta began. "Although I seem great in age, I am only that age -- three years. Thus I had much to learn about life in this world.
"One great mystery was girls. I found them attractive in a strange way. (Something about their screams really appeals to me. And even though there's less bone and meat to them, they seem able to take more torture before finally passing out or dying. But I digress.) Anyhow, I needed to learn how to attract more of them. So I turned to you."
Maxi dumbly dropped his nunchaku. "Ehhhhh?!? Me?"
"Did you or did you not once publish a scroll called 'The Dandy Daily Digest?'" Astaroth challenged.
"Errrr..." Maxi said, "...I'd hoped nobody actually read that. I only did two issues of it..."
Astaroth lifted his head and turned it to fix his balefully blank eyes upon Maxi. "In it, you had an article called 'Tips on Getting Chicks Without Pillaging.' And one of the biggest tips, right after '#1: Always Look Dandy,' was '#2: Chicks Dig Scars.'"
Astaroth now turned to face Maxi fully. "Look, Maxi! Look what your advice has done to me!" Astaroth jabbed his huge thumb at a massively swollen 16- centimeter wound in the center of his chest. "CHICKS DO NOT DIG THIS!"
"Great roiling waves!" Maxi said with a terrible grimace. "Did you do that to yourself?"
"Never mind that!" Asta said. "It's YOUR fault! It was YOUR bad advice! And since lawsuits haven't been invented yet, I require your life! YOUR SOUL IS M I N E !!!
Maxi wasn't sure which was worse; losing his life and soul to this demon who killed his old crew or living on with the knowledge that the same probably made up the entire readership of "The Dandy Daily Digest." It sure was tough being dandy.
(Author's Note: Of all the confrontations, this was one of the most baffling. There was nothing in Astaroth's profile or history that would lead him to have Maxi as his sub-boss. So I had to look elsewhere for a motivation. Maxi's catchcopy, "Dandy of the High Seas," proved to be a great inspiration. )
After many grueling battles, Astaroth confronted Maxi.
The enemies stood in the raised ring. Astaroth was half-turned away and spoke without looking at Maxi.
"At last, I've found you again," the huge monster said with a voice that rumbled like an earthquake. "And I will have my vengeance."
"YOUR vengeance?" Maxi said incredulously. "What are you talking about? I'm the one who has vengeance issues with you, not the other way around."
"You're so wrong!" Astaroth yelled. "You don't know the pain you've put me through!"
Now Maxi was really confused. "Okay, this I GOTTA hear. Aside from a crack on the noggin with my 'chucks, how did I EVER cause a demon like you pain?"
"It started three years ago," Asta began. "Although I seem great in age, I am only that age -- three years. Thus I had much to learn about life in this world.
"One great mystery was girls. I found them attractive in a strange way. (Something about their screams really appeals to me. And even though there's less bone and meat to them, they seem able to take more torture before finally passing out or dying. But I digress.) Anyhow, I needed to learn how to attract more of them. So I turned to you."
Maxi dumbly dropped his nunchaku. "Ehhhhh?!? Me?"
"Did you or did you not once publish a scroll called 'The Dandy Daily Digest?'" Astaroth challenged.
"Errrr..." Maxi said, "...I'd hoped nobody actually read that. I only did two issues of it..."
Astaroth lifted his head and turned it to fix his balefully blank eyes upon Maxi. "In it, you had an article called 'Tips on Getting Chicks Without Pillaging.' And one of the biggest tips, right after '#1: Always Look Dandy,' was '#2: Chicks Dig Scars.'"
Astaroth now turned to face Maxi fully. "Look, Maxi! Look what your advice has done to me!" Astaroth jabbed his huge thumb at a massively swollen 16- centimeter wound in the center of his chest. "CHICKS DO NOT DIG THIS!"
"Great roiling waves!" Maxi said with a terrible grimace. "Did you do that to yourself?"
"Never mind that!" Asta said. "It's YOUR fault! It was YOUR bad advice! And since lawsuits haven't been invented yet, I require your life! YOUR SOUL IS M I N E !!!
Maxi wasn't sure which was worse; losing his life and soul to this demon who killed his old crew or living on with the knowledge that the same probably made up the entire readership of "The Dandy Daily Digest." It sure was tough being dandy.
(Author's Note: Of all the confrontations, this was one of the most baffling. There was nothing in Astaroth's profile or history that would lead him to have Maxi as his sub-boss. So I had to look elsewhere for a motivation. Maxi's catchcopy, "Dandy of the High Seas," proved to be a great inspiration. )