Author's Notes: So, here I go with another fanfic. Shin's Voice has spoken!
Don't you guys love fanfics about Heero and Duo's friendship? So, I am
trying one here....How will Heero react when Duo is missed in battle?
Missed forever...As he heads towards a new mission in order to forget and
heal his guilty emotions, he will notice something odd around him...Who is
this strange shadow following him everywhere? Who's the one helping him?
Who's the Oz's spy sent to ruin his mission?...
"Of Good-byes And Returns"
Chapter One
"Move away" –Heero ordered, shooting his rifle and destroying some Dolls.
"Hey! Watch out!" –Duo complained as he avoided the beam from Wing Zero cannon- "You should tell me when you're gonna fire the Dolls at our right so I can go for the left ones. It's not difficult, ya know?" –Duo smiled teasingly.
"I just did it" –Heero answered in his usual monotone voice.
"Yeah, sure…" –Duo laughed- "Ya gotta be more careful, man, or you're gonna wipe away these people's houses. Instead of protecting the satellites, you're gonna blow them to Hell…" –Duo said, half joking, half serious, when he saw how close Wing Zero's beam was from the satellites they were supposed to protect in this mission.
"I know what I am doing. I don't make such stupid mistakes…" –Heero replied, his ego pinched. But he put the cannon aside and grabbed hold of the glittering laser, facing more enemies.
"Sure thing! The Perfect Soldier" –Duo mocked with a smirk, as his green scythe beheaded three more Dolls.- " Well, seems to me like we're over here. No signs in this screen, not in this one and this…wait a sec!" –Duo looked his left side monitor.
"One more Doll…I'll take it" –Heero said as he flew towards the last enemy, which was trying to protect itself among the satellites.
"Hold on, Heero!" –Duo tried to stop him. That Doll seemed suspicious. It moved slower and its size was disproportionate. Duo activated the scanning system, getting a better view from it.
"I knew it" –Duo whispered, flying right behind Wing Zero- "It has a gundanium cannon integrated. And Heero here don't want to listen…typical…"
"Last Doll of this mission" –the Japanese pilot murmured as he fired it, but the Doll ducked it. The beam was dangerously close to the satellites.
"Hn. I can't use Wing's cannon here as it is hidden among the satellites" –Heero thought as he immediately wielded the laser.
"Hey, wait a minute, man! Heero! The Doll has a cannon integrated in his left arm and I'm sure it's …"
"Move" –Heero ignored Duo's image in the right screen- "I know it. I can take it" –Heero added as he got closer to the Doll.
"Man, you're a lost cause, buddy" –Duo sighed nodding as he followed him.
Heero knew DeathScythe was a better close-fight model, but it was almost his duty to give the last strike of the mission. After all, the mission was assigned to him and Duo was there just as a backup. Just because the American had insisted in helping him.
Heero lifted the laser and Wing Zero hurled over the OZ enemy, which stayed still, targeting him with the cannon.
"It's fooling you! It's gonna fire!" –Duo yelled, hurling himself over Wing Zero.
But Heero didn't stop. The mission was almost accomplished. Besides, Zero was strong and he knew it could take it. The precise moment as Heero lowered the laser, the Doll fired.
Duo's hands were clenched into fists. He knew what was going to happen. He could see it like in a slow speed camera. But he didn't even think it twice and he took the decision.
The DeathScythe crushed into Wing Zero, putting it out of the fire line and the attack reached the 02 Gundam with all its strength.
"It's a gundanium cannon, I tried to tell ya…You should learn to listen, buddy boy…"
Duo's voice and image disappeared from the right screen of 01 Gundam, as DeathScythe exploded into pieces, falling and crushing over one of the satellites under them.
Heero stayed still for a while. He suddenly awoke, looking towards the Doll, which had also exploded due to the cannon's pressure.
"It was gundanium's …" –he murmured, realizing his mistake. In the blink of an eye, Wing Zero made its way down, landing beside DeathScythe's ruins. The cockpit was opened and Heero jumped from it, swearing in more languages than he supposed he knew.
"Duo!" –Heero tried to get closer to the central part of the Gundam, but it took him time and effort, as the fire was surrounding him. The cockpit was full of smoke and circuit shocks, cracked in two pieces. He stayed there, his glance penetrating all the surroundings. Nothing. Not a single hint. Everything was destroyed. The cockpit was Hell itself.
"Damn it, Duo. Say something! Where are you? Just a sound!" –Heero said out loud, but nothing answered him.
Heero gave some steps around, impatient, annoyed, desperate to say the truth. Scared. That was the word. He was scared. His heart started to pound painfully. It couldn't be, it couldn't be…
Suddenly, he caught a glimpse of a metallic shine among the junk and irons. It was familiar… Yes, he recognized it immediately.
It was the silver cross that Duo always wore under his priest's jacket. He had seen it before and Duo had told him once that it was one of his most valuable possessions.
A wave of relief filled his mind and chest as he started to lift the irons. He knew that if he found the cross, he would find Duo.
Time stopped for him. He was standing there, among the wrecks, silent and amazed. In the rough surface, under his blue glance, was the silver cross.
Only the silver cross. He bent slowly to pick it up, but when he touched it, he dropped it instantly, his hand seared. It was burning up. The cross had been in Hell, among the flames…
----------------------------------------------0----------------------------- ------------------
Quatre had a bad feeling about this. He realized that Heero and Duo were one day delayed in their return to the ship all the pilots were living in.
One week ago, a mission had come up for Heero. And Duo had offered to go to lend a hand. Though the Japanese boy pretended not to agree with that, Quatre knew better. He knew loneliness and boredom were always driven away by the cheerful American, and every pilot was grateful for that. Even though they never accepted it…
The mission was to protect the rebel soldiers installed in a savage zone of satellites, but the pilots hadn't come back yet.
When the smaller ship arrived at last and Heero came down, Quatre was sure something had gone wrong. It was perceptible in the blue-eyed pilot's aura. Wufei and Trowa were surprised to see DeathScythe, or what it was left of it…
Heero stood in front of them, an odd expression of tiredness and contrition painted in his features. He seemed like someone waiting for his life sentence. After a moment of total expectation, the bomb was released.
Heero told them about the mission and what happened in their last battle with the less words possible. He didn't want to face the other's glances, so he didn't stared at their eyes. Some minutes of silent passed before Heero turned away and made his way to his dorm, locking himself into.
Each one of the other pilots stood there, disbelief and sadness written in their faces. Wufei walked away to the other room, immersed in a deep meditation. Trowa sighed and occupied a place in front of a large window, resembling one of Duo's stances. A while later, a soft melancholic violin melody floated in the air, reaching all the pilots. Quatre was taking refuge in the music…
And among the darkness of a silent room, Heero was laying is his bed, staring into the silver object that was shining in his hand…
-----------------------------------------------0---------------------------- ------------------
Three weeks had gone already. The tragic news had left an emptiness sensation everywhere.
"Heero? Heero?" –Quatre got closer to his comrade, who was working in a Gundam's repair.
That could have been a normal scene, but not this time. The Gundam Heero was working on wasn't Wing Zero, it was DeathScythe.
Heero was just finishing some final details, because after working hard those last three weeks, the 02 Gundam was 'top notch', as Duo would say it. In perfect conditions. None of the other pilots had offered to help him, because they knew Heero wanted to do this alone. Since that day, 01 had isolated even more from the team.
"Hello, Heero…" –Quatre sat beside him- "You have finished, right? It's an excellent job…" –Quatre went on, trying to sound calm and polite.
Heero didn't answered.
"So…tell me, how you been doing? How do you feel?" –Quatre asked nervously.
Heero looked askance at him, with his usual serious expression. He didn't want to answer, but he didn't want the others to think he was feeling…miserable. That was exactly how he was feeling.
"I'm fine" –he said at last, reconnecting the main systems of the navigation computer of DeathScythe.
"Hn" –was Quatre's response. The blonde thought for a moment before continuing.
"You know, Heero, we are all highly affected by what happened. We tried to honor our friend and to return to our usual life, but it's so hard. We miss so many things. Little details, that all put together, are incredibly real. All Duo…We have faced this pain with our personal strengths, in our personal ways…I can feel this sorrow from all of us, all of us. But now I am worried because you're closing yourself into this and I can't…"
"What's the point?" –Heero interrupted him, closing with a thump one module- "If you are asking me how I feel for real, if I feel guilty, well...yes, that's it. I do feel like that, ok?" –he said with a grunt.
"Heero, I know you aren't comfortable talking about this, but even though you don't want to listen to me, I have to say it. I just wanted to tell you that you're wrong, you shouldn't feel guilty for…"
"Don't you come to me with that…" –Heero interrupted him again, his icy glare threatening 04.
Quatre held his glance and then he smiled condescendingly.
"I remember…I remember we had a dialogue like this with Duo sometime, about his past…do you remember?" –he said kindly.
"Completely different" –Heero replied. -"He had no fault at all…Do you think I don't know what the risks at war are? I perfectly know that we are playing our lives every time we fight; we can die from one second to another. But what happened, that was not a casualty. It was a direct consequence of my mistake…"
"Maybe you're right…"-Quatre said, surprising Heero- "You did make a mistake…just like every one. Like me and the others. Like any other human been. But what happened, Heero, that was not just a consequence of your mistake, it was also Duo's decision consequence. Do you see it? It was his decision. No one forced himself to do it. And you can't control people's decisions…."
"You know he thought very highly of you. If all of us would have known the future one week back, I am sure he would have done exactly the same. That's friendship, Heero, and you know it. Just think of this like if Duo had accomplished one more mission…"
Quatre stood up and, before leaving the room, he looked back at DeathScythe and smiled.
"Duo would love the job…" –he said nicely and he left, closing the door behind him.
Heero also stood up…Three weeks and he couldn't still believe it. Just like that day over the satellite, as he stared to the silver cross. He stayed in that spot, among the dying fire, waiting for something. He wasn't sure what. He thought that maybe, in some way, Duo would appear there. But that didn't happen…
Now, three weeks later, Heero still thought that maybe Duo was fine, and he would enter through that door at any minute. But that didn't happen either. Duo was dead.
The sudden sound of the computer's call brought him back to reality. In a few moments, the four Gundam Pilots were in the main room. Preventors informed them that the Rebel's confrontation against OZ in the 7XB zone was getting difficult and they needed a Gundam's help.
"I take it. Mission accepted" –Heero said as he began to walk towards the hangar.
"I'm going with you" –Quatre rapidly added as he realized that that was the satellites' zone.
"No. I'm going alone" –Heero said adamantly, clearly indicating that was a final decision.
To Be Continued…
*************Shinigami's Voice***************
A/N: Please R&R. Please? I'll be so grateful…
"Of Good-byes And Returns"
Chapter One
"Move away" –Heero ordered, shooting his rifle and destroying some Dolls.
"Hey! Watch out!" –Duo complained as he avoided the beam from Wing Zero cannon- "You should tell me when you're gonna fire the Dolls at our right so I can go for the left ones. It's not difficult, ya know?" –Duo smiled teasingly.
"I just did it" –Heero answered in his usual monotone voice.
"Yeah, sure…" –Duo laughed- "Ya gotta be more careful, man, or you're gonna wipe away these people's houses. Instead of protecting the satellites, you're gonna blow them to Hell…" –Duo said, half joking, half serious, when he saw how close Wing Zero's beam was from the satellites they were supposed to protect in this mission.
"I know what I am doing. I don't make such stupid mistakes…" –Heero replied, his ego pinched. But he put the cannon aside and grabbed hold of the glittering laser, facing more enemies.
"Sure thing! The Perfect Soldier" –Duo mocked with a smirk, as his green scythe beheaded three more Dolls.- " Well, seems to me like we're over here. No signs in this screen, not in this one and this…wait a sec!" –Duo looked his left side monitor.
"One more Doll…I'll take it" –Heero said as he flew towards the last enemy, which was trying to protect itself among the satellites.
"Hold on, Heero!" –Duo tried to stop him. That Doll seemed suspicious. It moved slower and its size was disproportionate. Duo activated the scanning system, getting a better view from it.
"I knew it" –Duo whispered, flying right behind Wing Zero- "It has a gundanium cannon integrated. And Heero here don't want to listen…typical…"
"Last Doll of this mission" –the Japanese pilot murmured as he fired it, but the Doll ducked it. The beam was dangerously close to the satellites.
"Hn. I can't use Wing's cannon here as it is hidden among the satellites" –Heero thought as he immediately wielded the laser.
"Hey, wait a minute, man! Heero! The Doll has a cannon integrated in his left arm and I'm sure it's …"
"Move" –Heero ignored Duo's image in the right screen- "I know it. I can take it" –Heero added as he got closer to the Doll.
"Man, you're a lost cause, buddy" –Duo sighed nodding as he followed him.
Heero knew DeathScythe was a better close-fight model, but it was almost his duty to give the last strike of the mission. After all, the mission was assigned to him and Duo was there just as a backup. Just because the American had insisted in helping him.
Heero lifted the laser and Wing Zero hurled over the OZ enemy, which stayed still, targeting him with the cannon.
"It's fooling you! It's gonna fire!" –Duo yelled, hurling himself over Wing Zero.
But Heero didn't stop. The mission was almost accomplished. Besides, Zero was strong and he knew it could take it. The precise moment as Heero lowered the laser, the Doll fired.
Duo's hands were clenched into fists. He knew what was going to happen. He could see it like in a slow speed camera. But he didn't even think it twice and he took the decision.
The DeathScythe crushed into Wing Zero, putting it out of the fire line and the attack reached the 02 Gundam with all its strength.
"It's a gundanium cannon, I tried to tell ya…You should learn to listen, buddy boy…"
Duo's voice and image disappeared from the right screen of 01 Gundam, as DeathScythe exploded into pieces, falling and crushing over one of the satellites under them.
Heero stayed still for a while. He suddenly awoke, looking towards the Doll, which had also exploded due to the cannon's pressure.
"It was gundanium's …" –he murmured, realizing his mistake. In the blink of an eye, Wing Zero made its way down, landing beside DeathScythe's ruins. The cockpit was opened and Heero jumped from it, swearing in more languages than he supposed he knew.
"Duo!" –Heero tried to get closer to the central part of the Gundam, but it took him time and effort, as the fire was surrounding him. The cockpit was full of smoke and circuit shocks, cracked in two pieces. He stayed there, his glance penetrating all the surroundings. Nothing. Not a single hint. Everything was destroyed. The cockpit was Hell itself.
"Damn it, Duo. Say something! Where are you? Just a sound!" –Heero said out loud, but nothing answered him.
Heero gave some steps around, impatient, annoyed, desperate to say the truth. Scared. That was the word. He was scared. His heart started to pound painfully. It couldn't be, it couldn't be…
Suddenly, he caught a glimpse of a metallic shine among the junk and irons. It was familiar… Yes, he recognized it immediately.
It was the silver cross that Duo always wore under his priest's jacket. He had seen it before and Duo had told him once that it was one of his most valuable possessions.
A wave of relief filled his mind and chest as he started to lift the irons. He knew that if he found the cross, he would find Duo.
Time stopped for him. He was standing there, among the wrecks, silent and amazed. In the rough surface, under his blue glance, was the silver cross.
Only the silver cross. He bent slowly to pick it up, but when he touched it, he dropped it instantly, his hand seared. It was burning up. The cross had been in Hell, among the flames…
----------------------------------------------0----------------------------- ------------------
Quatre had a bad feeling about this. He realized that Heero and Duo were one day delayed in their return to the ship all the pilots were living in.
One week ago, a mission had come up for Heero. And Duo had offered to go to lend a hand. Though the Japanese boy pretended not to agree with that, Quatre knew better. He knew loneliness and boredom were always driven away by the cheerful American, and every pilot was grateful for that. Even though they never accepted it…
The mission was to protect the rebel soldiers installed in a savage zone of satellites, but the pilots hadn't come back yet.
When the smaller ship arrived at last and Heero came down, Quatre was sure something had gone wrong. It was perceptible in the blue-eyed pilot's aura. Wufei and Trowa were surprised to see DeathScythe, or what it was left of it…
Heero stood in front of them, an odd expression of tiredness and contrition painted in his features. He seemed like someone waiting for his life sentence. After a moment of total expectation, the bomb was released.
Heero told them about the mission and what happened in their last battle with the less words possible. He didn't want to face the other's glances, so he didn't stared at their eyes. Some minutes of silent passed before Heero turned away and made his way to his dorm, locking himself into.
Each one of the other pilots stood there, disbelief and sadness written in their faces. Wufei walked away to the other room, immersed in a deep meditation. Trowa sighed and occupied a place in front of a large window, resembling one of Duo's stances. A while later, a soft melancholic violin melody floated in the air, reaching all the pilots. Quatre was taking refuge in the music…
And among the darkness of a silent room, Heero was laying is his bed, staring into the silver object that was shining in his hand…
-----------------------------------------------0---------------------------- ------------------
Three weeks had gone already. The tragic news had left an emptiness sensation everywhere.
"Heero? Heero?" –Quatre got closer to his comrade, who was working in a Gundam's repair.
That could have been a normal scene, but not this time. The Gundam Heero was working on wasn't Wing Zero, it was DeathScythe.
Heero was just finishing some final details, because after working hard those last three weeks, the 02 Gundam was 'top notch', as Duo would say it. In perfect conditions. None of the other pilots had offered to help him, because they knew Heero wanted to do this alone. Since that day, 01 had isolated even more from the team.
"Hello, Heero…" –Quatre sat beside him- "You have finished, right? It's an excellent job…" –Quatre went on, trying to sound calm and polite.
Heero didn't answered.
"So…tell me, how you been doing? How do you feel?" –Quatre asked nervously.
Heero looked askance at him, with his usual serious expression. He didn't want to answer, but he didn't want the others to think he was feeling…miserable. That was exactly how he was feeling.
"I'm fine" –he said at last, reconnecting the main systems of the navigation computer of DeathScythe.
"Hn" –was Quatre's response. The blonde thought for a moment before continuing.
"You know, Heero, we are all highly affected by what happened. We tried to honor our friend and to return to our usual life, but it's so hard. We miss so many things. Little details, that all put together, are incredibly real. All Duo…We have faced this pain with our personal strengths, in our personal ways…I can feel this sorrow from all of us, all of us. But now I am worried because you're closing yourself into this and I can't…"
"What's the point?" –Heero interrupted him, closing with a thump one module- "If you are asking me how I feel for real, if I feel guilty, well...yes, that's it. I do feel like that, ok?" –he said with a grunt.
"Heero, I know you aren't comfortable talking about this, but even though you don't want to listen to me, I have to say it. I just wanted to tell you that you're wrong, you shouldn't feel guilty for…"
"Don't you come to me with that…" –Heero interrupted him again, his icy glare threatening 04.
Quatre held his glance and then he smiled condescendingly.
"I remember…I remember we had a dialogue like this with Duo sometime, about his past…do you remember?" –he said kindly.
"Completely different" –Heero replied. -"He had no fault at all…Do you think I don't know what the risks at war are? I perfectly know that we are playing our lives every time we fight; we can die from one second to another. But what happened, that was not a casualty. It was a direct consequence of my mistake…"
"Maybe you're right…"-Quatre said, surprising Heero- "You did make a mistake…just like every one. Like me and the others. Like any other human been. But what happened, Heero, that was not just a consequence of your mistake, it was also Duo's decision consequence. Do you see it? It was his decision. No one forced himself to do it. And you can't control people's decisions…."
"You know he thought very highly of you. If all of us would have known the future one week back, I am sure he would have done exactly the same. That's friendship, Heero, and you know it. Just think of this like if Duo had accomplished one more mission…"
Quatre stood up and, before leaving the room, he looked back at DeathScythe and smiled.
"Duo would love the job…" –he said nicely and he left, closing the door behind him.
Heero also stood up…Three weeks and he couldn't still believe it. Just like that day over the satellite, as he stared to the silver cross. He stayed in that spot, among the dying fire, waiting for something. He wasn't sure what. He thought that maybe, in some way, Duo would appear there. But that didn't happen…
Now, three weeks later, Heero still thought that maybe Duo was fine, and he would enter through that door at any minute. But that didn't happen either. Duo was dead.
The sudden sound of the computer's call brought him back to reality. In a few moments, the four Gundam Pilots were in the main room. Preventors informed them that the Rebel's confrontation against OZ in the 7XB zone was getting difficult and they needed a Gundam's help.
"I take it. Mission accepted" –Heero said as he began to walk towards the hangar.
"I'm going with you" –Quatre rapidly added as he realized that that was the satellites' zone.
"No. I'm going alone" –Heero said adamantly, clearly indicating that was a final decision.
To Be Continued…
*************Shinigami's Voice***************
A/N: Please R&R. Please? I'll be so grateful…