Told You So

Yeah, a songfic. I don't know if I like songfics much... they tend to be really repetitive. However, this idea got stuck in my head and just WOULD NOT go away! This of course, is based on the Barenaked Ladies song, 'Told You So'. Very bittersweet... Taito of course. ^_^;; Although I don't like seeing Yamato in this light, and I prefer the 'yaoi conquers all' theory, this song brought out the other side of the coin. The end of 02 showed the 'future' and what happens to the chosen children. Well, this is my more pessimistic reaction. But it's still sweet. Plus, I'm a HUGE fan of Taichi in general, I just love his characterization, so I wanted to write something where he ends up WITHOUT a partner! Wow, it's ok to not be part of a couple? What a CONCEPT! ^_~ Sorry this is so sad!!!!!!! It even depressed me while I was writing it! ;-;

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"Taichi?" Yamato looked up from the book in his lap. I sighed, and handed him his bag.
"You need to leave, now."

I never jumped in and rescued you
but I wanted to
I didn't tell you which way to go,
'cause I thought you'd know

"W-what?" Yamato stared. He had been staying with me regularly for months, now. After his marriage to Sora, and his quick realization that he had made a mistake, he had turned to me. I had wanted to warn him, but he never would have listened. Now, he had children to think of, and couldn't leave her. He didn't want to turn into his parents. He didn't want to hurt a child like they hurt him. So, he just slept with me, and spent the rest of his time with her.

you had a problem with your new found wealth,
you brought it on yourself
I never told you I told you so
but I told you so

"I said, you have to leave now," I stated again. My voice wavered, but I did not.
"Is it time for me to pick the kids up from day care, already?" He glanced at the clock, missing the point entirely.
"No," I said more clearly. "I mean, you need to leave for good." I had never seen him look more shocked or depressed. I didn't understand why. This was inevitable. I'm not one to be used, not even by him. "You have a wife and children waiting for you, you should be happy."
"But I don't love her! I love you!" he stood, trying to touch his hand to my cheek.
I wanted to say it, but I didn't. I just brushed him aside.

Have to let it go
It's time to let it go
Now I can't believe
it took so long to leave
perhaps one day I'll grieve
or I never will

"I should have never done this. I apologize if I led you on. I love you, but I can get on without you. I can't live like this anymore." I tried to hand him his bag again. He took it, looking numb.
"You know I can't leave her!"
"I know."

I never told you I agreed with you
I don't think I do
I wasn't sure quite what the whole thing meant
but I'm glad you went

He must have seen how serious I was, because he didn't try to argue anymore. He just took his bag and walked out the door. I locked it behind him and sat down on the couch. I could still feel his warmth on it's cushions. I didn't cry.

I never thought it could be painless
but it is, I guess
I had myself fooled into needing you
did I fool you too?

Maybe it could have been different. If he had learned to love anyone, especially himself, he could have loved her back. Then, I could have stayed alone. Or he could have loved me. Either way, it doesn't hurt. I wonder if he thought I couldn't live without him? I have courage, if nothing else.

Have to let it go
It's time to let it go
Now I can't believe
it took so long to leave
perhaps one day I'll grieve
or I never will

I felt like I should have been depressed. I felt like I should have cried. Nothing happened. When I heard his voice on the radio, I felt nothing. When I saw him with Sora at Mimi's annual 'Chosen Children Reunion', I ignored him.

A virile infection that can incubate for years
Caused by affection fallen deep into arrears
No medication to procure
Makes me pure, there's no cure, I am sure

I know I'll never get over him. He's the only one I could ever love. But maybe it's OK to be alone. Occasionally I have a fling, but I always think of him. I still can't smile for anyone else. I save those for his face, when I see his music videos on TV. I'm glad.

I never mentioned how I've prayed for you,
And now I've paid for you
I never said that I would wait for you,
It's too late for you

I wanted him to be happy. I wanted him to love me, not her. I wanted him to run off with me on the day of their wedding. I even told him how I felt, hoping he would change his mind. He didn't. He was scared. I never promised anything. I tried to warn him, I wasn't interested in someone who couldn't love me back. But I gave him love anyway. When he showed up at my door crying, I took him in. I tried to care, even though he couldn't care for me. I never promised anything.

It's time to let it go
Now I can't believe
it took so long to leave
perhaps one day I'll grieve
or I never will...
or I never will...
I never will.

Now he's really famous, his kids are getting older, and his relationship with Sora is public. She craves the attention, and he hates sharing the spotlight with a woman who cares about his image, and not him. They're known as the nation's most unstable couple. It's only a matter of time until he leaves her. I know he'll show up at my door again, crying, looking for love. I'll have to turn him away. Maybe one day I'll feel something again. Maybe one day I'll break down, call him up, and ask him if he still cares. Maybe someday cry. Probably not.