He hadn't moved since Carly had stormed out in tears. He vaguely remembered Liz leaving but he had no recollection of how much time had actually passed by. He just kept playing the scene over and over in his head…it was etched, word for word into his memory.
He pictured her face, her eyes filling with tears, as he had hurled insult after insult at her. Her final words rang in his head…he had driven her to say them of course but he couldn't help but think there was some truth to them. He had pushed and pushed, trying to destroy any vestige of a connection that had remained between them. The best defense is a good offence…he had heard that somewhere.
Well, he had succeeded admirably…in ten minutes he had managed to destroy his last chance at a real family. His bitter laughter echoed throughout the penthouse, just one more reminder of how empty his home felt without Carly and Michael.
His thoughts were interrupted by a soft knock at the door.
"Go away!!" Sonny bellowed in response to a knock at his door. Where the hell was Johnny? He had specifically instructed his guard not to let anyone bother him tonight.
"Sonny?" called a tentative voice from behind the door. "It's Bobbie…I need to speak to you! It's important…please let me in."
Sonny stared straight ahead, making no move to rise from his position on the couch.
"Please Sonny…"
With a sigh, he hauled himself up and shuffled over to the door. This better not be about Roy!
"Listen Bobbie, this isn't the best time right now…maybe you could come back tomorrow." It was a statement not a question and, without even bothering to look at her, he closed the door.
"Sonny!! Listen to me. Carly's gone. I got home from the hospital today and there was no sign of her or Michael except…oh!" She gasped as the door swung open with such force that it nearly fell off the hinges.
"What do you mean "gone"? She's probably just out shopping or at the park."
"That's what I thought…but Sonny," she paused as she searched for something in her purse, "all of their clothes were gone and the place was spotless. I found this too," she said as she produced a small white envelope.
"Why do you care anyway…I thought you wanted her out?" He glared at her, as he reached over and grabbed the envelope.
She continued, ignoring his comment, "It was sitting on her dresser. I don't know what to make of it, do you?"
He unfolded the letter and began to read…
Dear Momma,
I am taking you up on your advice and leaving here while I have the courage to do it.
I know when you told me I should leave, you meant moving back in with Sonny but I can't do that, Momma, I just can't. I can't and I won't settle for anything less than what I deserve (keep the snide comments to yourself, Momma). He doesn't love me, not like I want him too. Maybe I don't deserve it…maybe I do but either way I want the whole package…someone to love me, someone to have a family with, someone who will love me not despite what I am but because of it.
I thought that person was Sonny. I thought we had a real future together until I overheard him on the Island. That was why I left him, Momma, not because I was trying to hurt him or manipulate him, I left him because…for once in my life…I wanted to do right by someone…he deserved more than to be shackled to a woman he doesn't love for the rest of his life because he feels obligated to take care of her and her kid.
You kept pushing me back to him though, and I really thought that maybe we could work something out. I went to the Penthouse today to ask him if we could move back in but I never got the chance. He's already moved on to bigger and better things! Sorry, that was my hurt showing through…I t was my own fault, I overreacted and started a fight. It was a good thing I did though because I found out the truth. He hates me…plain and simple. He thinks I'm trash and somehow I don't think he'd be caught dead within two blocks of me now. I know what you're thinking, once again I managed to f*** up a relationship but believe me when I say that's the last thing I meant to do.
I…I care…no, that's not right…I love Sonny, Momma, more than I was willing to admit to myself. I can't stand by and watch as he lives his life fully and happily without me, it hurts too much.
So I've decided to make a clean, fresh start somewhere else… somewhere where I can begin again, without my mistakes coming back to haunt me.
No matter what you may think of me, Momma, I love you and I'm thankful for finding you and getting a chance to know you. I know we haven't always seen eye to eye…in fact, we didn't agree most of the time but that didn't matter, you know? Thank you for being my mother.
Caroline
She had scratched out Benson and instead written Spencer.
P.S. Don't worry about us…we'll get by.