By Admiral Albia
Author's note; So what exactly is in Spandex Space? Well, Duo's about to find out! ~_^ And meanwhile, Quatre's... analysing... Trowa's bang... and... well, I'm not too sure what Wufei's doing. Any guesses?
And I'm sorry if any relationships seem OOC, I haven't yet had the liberty of seeing them interact with each other in the series *sniff* I'm only up to Episode 13... though I have seen Endless Waltz... ^_^
And some scenes will have to be cut through... [] signals place change. [Topside] Means that we're not in Heero's shorts any more, and so on.
Warnings; Mild 2+1. Not sure if that'll change to 1+2+1, but ya never know... incidentally, though, I'm crap at writing romance so don't expect anything major developing. Almost definite 3+4 comin' up.
Disclaimer; I own nothing. Not even the plot. Wish I had some of those slides of Duo's though...
Chapter 5
As Duo stepped - nay, fell - into the mystery known as Spandex
Space, he was intrigued to find that the radio contact probably wasn't
necessary, as he could hear everything perfectly well, if a little amplified;
Heero's voice in particular was much louder than usual.
Sighing, he picked himself up and switched the radio
off. "Quatre, can you hear me?"
"Duo?" Duo winced; the voices really were very
loud when heard from down(?) here. "You sound very... quiet."
"Really? You sound deafening. Where are you?"
"Uh..."
"Quatre," Heero's voice, sounding far too
patient, broke in, "If you value your life, don't get any closer."
"Not that he can," Duo distinctly heard an anonymous
voice mutter.
"Uh... hehe...sure, Heero..."
"Oh, that's where you were," Duo muttered as Quatre's
overly-loud footsteps receded into the distance. Sighing, he looked around
and found that, contrary to his first impressions, Spandex Space was not
completely dark, but more... odd. The walls were black and slightly curved,
and light was filtering through them in a sort of weave pattern... looking
closer, the braided scientist found that it was, in fact, a weave; he could
push his fingers through it. Duo gulped. Either he was very small, or something
odd was going on here. Fortunately, though, the weave was letting light
through, and that meant that Duo could look around.
He was in an oval-shaped room. Whatever Duo had
thought of his surroundings, it had quite a low ceiling, except in one
part where there was a large drop. The room was covered floor-to ceiling
with various sorting devices - a filing cabinet, some shelves, and a few
tables - but most of the objects in the room were in the floor. In a heap.
"Geez, Hee-chan, don't you ever tidy up in here?"
"Shut up," Heero hissed. Duo grinned to himself;
he'd obviously found a source of entertainment for himself, annoyance for
Heero... and better still, Heero couldn't do anything to Duo, at least
while Duo was down Heero's shorts. Near his groin. Heero's groin... no,
focus, Duo, focus.
"Man, I never thought you'd be this messy
in private! So neat in public..."
"Shut up."
"And this is the guy who was always yelling at me
about my mess..."
"Shut. Up."
"Hey Hee-chan, shall I tidy up for you?"
"No."
"Aw, c'mon! Even my messes are tidier than this...
this mountain."
[Topside]
Heero was deathglaring his shorts. It didn't take a genius to work out
that this was because of Duo, but Wufei was still finding it highly entertaining,
especially as Heero's legs shifted involuntarily to get out of glaring
range... apparently his glares even affected him.
Quatre and Trowa had gone off somewhere after Heero
had forcibly removed Quatre's ear from his lower regions, with the proclaimed
intention of `analysing Trowa's bang`. Exactly why a scientist couldn't
do this the oriental men couldn't quite understand, but there was presumeably
a good reason. The scientists were keeping well out of the way.
"You know, you really should take more care of your
shorts," Duo's voice came through the cloth again, sounding very distant.
"I mean look at this pair! They've been on the bottom of this... this heap
for months, by the look of it... and look at the blood! It's impossible
to get off once it dries!"
"Shut. Up."
"Make me," Duo said smugly. Heero seethed.
[A little way away]
"Soo, Trowa.... how do you get it to stay
like that?"
"..."
"Oh, right. How does that work?"
"..." Trowa murmured seductively.
"Trowa! There're people around!"
"..."
"But what if they walk in?"
"...///_^..."
"Oh, well, if you're sure..."
[Spandex Side]
Duo had given up, driven mainly by Heero's statement that he would take
his shorts off and shoot them if he didn't. The braided ex-pilot was
now wandering around the long, low room trying to see if there was anything
worth doing down here, all thoughts of analysing the science behind (hah!)
the shorts forgotten.
Several things in Spandex Space were well
organised; Heero's gun and laptop were in easy-to-find locations, and Duo
played around on the usually forbidden treasure (the laptop), for a while
before he heard Wufei asking why Heero's shorts were making noises usually
associated with... well, to put it bluntly, with a war game. Duo felt
Heero blush, though he was willing to bet it didn't show on the other man's
face. A second later, another hiss, this time of `Get off my laptop, Duo,`
reverberated around the walls of Spandex Space. Duo shrugged and exited
the game, but made a mental note not to do anything noisy on the computer.
Didn't mean he couldn't use it... though he was getting tired. Better find
something else.
The something else was found on the other side of
the room to what Duo had come to know as `the big drop`. It was an odd
shape, and strangely squishy; he couldn't see more than than, because Heero
was sitting down and blocking the light from entering. Curious, the braided
baka picked the... thing... up and squeezed it...
[Topside]
Heero leapt straight into the air with a scream of agony, curling up
into the foetal position the second his feet touched the ground.
"Duo," The Perfect Soldier ground out in a very
high voice, between whimpers, "Put that back right this instant!"
He winced again as what felt like a fingernail dug in. "Please!"
[Spandex Side]
Duo stared at the thing in his hands, Heero's screams still echoing
round his head, and blushed heavily as he realised what it was. He quickly,
and gently, placed it back on the table.
"S-sorry Heero." Another loud whimper was his only
response. "Uh... maybe you should install electric lighting around it...
it's kinda hard to see when you're sitting down...
"Just get away from it, Maxwell," Wufei's voice
came down, adding in what Duo supposed was meant to be a whisper and not
for his ears, "I could kill him if you like."
"Wuffie, I heard that."
"Damn." Wufei sighed. "Well, I could still kill
him, Yuy."
"No." The floor rocked as Heero shifted position,
though everything stayed in exactly the same position as before; including
Duo.
"Please?"
"Not while he's in my shorts."
"Oh..."
Ignoring the argument over whether or not Wufei could kill him on the
basis that Heero certainly would not allow a sword to be poked into his
groin, Duo continued on his journey around Spandex Space, stopping suddenly
as he saw that he'd left the laptop running, and that at some point something
must have hit the keyboard; it had somehow located a file called `diary_OMAE_O_KORUSU.doc`.
Grinning slightly, Duo opened the file, and was met with a password crisis,
at least until he remembered an invaluable piece of hacking and codebreaking
advice; `it's really quite simple once you realise that there are only
a certain amount of birthdays a person can have, and people do tend to
think the same way...`[1]
Grinning, the wide-eyed ex-pilot entered Heero's
birthdate and settled down to nose into his loved one's private life...
[1] Terry Pratchett quote; it's from `Jingo`, I think... or `The Fifth Elephant`. One of `em. Anyway, I know Heero probably wouldn't use such a simple password, but hey... it'd take too long otherwise...
/\/\/\
Woohoo! My chapters are getting back to their average length of three
pages! ^_^ Anyway... what secrets does Heero's diary hold? What are Quatre
and Trowa really up to? And when is Wufei going to walk in on them?
~_^ Find out in the next installement of An Analysis of Spandex Space,
which is guaranteed to come quicker if you review!*
*Guarantee will not be honoured. No matter what Wufei says.