Sorry it's so late! My computer died so I lost what I had of the second chapter. It was
so discouraging! It was just too depressing trying to rewrite it. My attempts sucked so bad. I just
needed a break from it. But now I'm able to improve upon my previous ideas.
So, yeah, I've changed things a bit. I even added Seiya in a part (hope there's no Seiya haters out there).
And it's a huge improvement on this big senshi meeting filler part I'd written in the first version.
Oh, and if it gets a bit choppy at parts, blame it on me reading too many of eternal angel's fics. I'm trying to
go for that kind of artistic style, and I've never been great at it but it fit the scene and I hope I pulled it off
well enough for it not to fry your brains.
PLEASE READ: This is only part of a chapter. I'd intended to post the finished product all in one chapter
but I felt bad for promising to finish it centuries ago. So I won't make any promises about the last half. Also,
since I'm not done with the second half of this I probably will change a lot of what's in here, it's really like a
rough, rough draft. So you can give me advice or negative feedback if you want. I'm seriously considering
cutting out or changing the last half. It's kind of just filler stuff right now. I'm sure you'll notice the lack of
angsty-ness in this one but I felt like making it more about apathy and giving up on life than about wallowing
in absolute misery. But hey, if you want angsty I can try for angsty. So opinions please! Do you
guys want Seiya to have a big part or small one? Take advantage of this, I'm normally not so open to
suggestions! But I'm really just kinda up in the air about how I want this chapter to go and am feeling pretty
uncomfortable about the flow since I'm using of bit of eternal angel's style.
Tomorrow
by moonangel
ch 2a out of 2
"You don't look too happy."
Silence.
"Ok bad joke. But Odango, I'm worried about you. We all are... *sigh* fine, be that way. You know I
can only stay a week longer. The princess needs me back soon but I can't just leave with you here in this
state!"
Seiya sighed. It was a bit frustrating trying to have a serious conversation with a door. Then again,
this was the closest anyone had gotten to Tsukino Usagi in the past two weeks. She'd simply refused
to come out and her parents, despite being overwhelmed with worry, had been a bit miffed that not one
of their often used and consistently heeded threats had gotten through to her and had backed off
completely. They decided to just put food outside her door during meal times and hoped she'd come
out sooner or later, realizing with a great deal of frustration that this was out of their hands. Seiya had a
feeling that on some level they were starting to understand that there were some things about their
daughter that they could never control.
Despite Rei's protests Seiya believed that he should be the one to get through to her. He and the
senshi knew what had happened after Rei'd filled them in. But when they tried to explain to Usagi she
hadn't listened. Well, it seemed that she hadn't. It was hard to tell when one was conversing with a door.
So after the last hour or so of arguing with an inanimate object, Seiya was starting to get a bit peeved.
Another equally annoying fact was that Mamoru had disappeared off the face of the Earth, ironic since
it was his planet. So Seiya couldn't try to explain the situation to him. Not that Mamoru would listen.
The man was too stubborn to listen to reason. And he wasn't any greater at controlling his jealousy,
not that he ever tried to. But Setsuna insisted that even if Mamoru would believe him, this was
something that the two moping lovers needed to work out by themselves (that seemed to be all she was
willing to tell them, despite their questions about her knowledge of the situation considering that she
had triggered this turn of events). So yeah, they were so supposed to let the couple handle things on
their own... Though a little push wouldn't hurt.
Staring with defeat at the stupid door that kept him from the woman he loved, he tried one last time,
deciding to stop with the whining and begging. He needed to stop trying to coax her out and just... talk,
make one big last ditch effort. She had to be listening.
"Odango, you love him. Any idiot with his head screwed on backwards could tell. And he loves you.
We've been through this and I'm not going to waste any more time trying to convince you of that fact.
I'm sick of this. After days and days of coming here, arguing the same points, I'm just getting so tired.
It's just getting harder and harder to think of the right words that'll do the job. So I'm done throwing
that 'true love', 'destiny' and 'soulmate' bull your way. But I just want to make one last try..."
"... as I said, you love him..."
A desolate figure sat on her rumpled bed, hugging her legs, seemingly oblivious to the frustrated young
man standing outside her door. If anyone was to see her they'd wonder if she was a statue, unmoving,
untouchable...
"... more than I've ever seen anyone love anyone before..."
She stared blankly out the window, wisps of ghostly, silver blond hair flowing around her in the cold
breeze that blowing in behind her open curtains.
"... and it just amazes me, every time, seeing that look in your eyes that tells me you're thinking about
him. I never knew it was possible for anyone to love so much...."
She shivered slightly in the breeze, her thin clothes impossibly wrinkled, her eyes impossibly red and
swollen.
"... Odango... say what you seem to believe is right. Say that there's a chance, no
matter how nonexistent I believe it to be, that he doesn't love you..."
Her lips trembled.
"... I know it's the scariest thing in the world. I know how your heart has shattered and you can't even
begin to even look for the pieces, much less try to start picking them up. And the world has fallen
apart and the sunniest skies only seem to mock your mood..."
She seemed so helpless against the cold. You'd think she was just a child, until you looked into her
eyes...
"... but inside, you know there's still a chance. Even if it's just the tiniest chance, you know it's there.
And you push it away and ignore it, afraid to put your tattered heart out on your sleeve one last time,
knowing that taking that chance only to lose it could destroy you forever. Because deep down you know
that though you deny it, it's the only thing keeping you alive..."
Those sad blue eyes shimmered.
"... but ask yourself this: why are still you holding on? Why are you still clinging to that chance? I
know you'd tell me that if you took the chance that he might actually love you and found out he didn't
you'll just die right there. Losing him was far too much, right?"
A lone tear spilled down a porcelain cheek.
"... Odango, I think I'm starting to realize something. This is real. This, what you two have, it's forever.
You two love each other! And I think that just may be all that really matters. That that's all that's ever
mattered. You *love* him. And that's the most amazing feeling in the world. You of all people should
know that. So now that you're being all depressed are you going to tell me that you'd give it all up, all
those happy times and wonderful feelings, just to avoid this pain? I know you Odango Atama. You
wouldn't. It's eating away at you but you'll never give it up. So I'm asking you why you're giving up now.
There's a chance. I'll be honest with you, if I believed just for a second that there was even a speck of a
chance that you might love me I'd go for it, welcome the pain, just to take that one chance on it... I'd give
everything for it..."
Her hand clutched at her heart.
"... Onegai, all I ask of you is don't be a coward. That isn't you. You've heard us. Don't tell me you
haven't. You heard our little explanation for what he said and yeah, I know it sounds lame. And that just
made it easy to toss it aside as an attempt by the senshi trying to make their friend happy and keep the
happy future they were promised, or whatever you choose to think. But please, just listen. Take the
chance. Kami-sama, you know what I always loved about you was that you've always preached your
heart out about love. Even in the bleakest situation I always believed that you of all people would bet on
love. You are the strongest person I've ever met. Onegai, don't let me down Odango..."
There was silence outside until she could hear a defeated sigh and the sound of footsteps retreating
down the stairs. For a long while after that Tsukino Usagi stared at her bedroom door.
It was so sunny outside it killed her. To think, just the simple warmth of the sun's rays used to be
enough to make everything in the world seem right. Yet, these days the blistering heat of that annoying
bright spot in the sky hardly mattered to this deathly pale girl who had cooped herself up in her room for
two weeks, living off the food her parents left at the door. It was funny how they couldn't deal with the
depressed, mature Usagi. They were at a complete loss. Unfortunately, it seemed everyone else knew
what had happened, more or less. Did Pluto tell them? Did Rei figured it out?
Did they find out from Mamoru?
... and did she have to mention his name? Not that it should matter since he was all she ever thought about.
But somehow just thinking his name brought on an extra wave of pain.
Why did Seiya always know how to get through to her? Why couldn't she just forget what he'd said? Why
couldn't she just cry her heart out like every day in who knows how long she'd been in there...
'You preach.. about love... Even in the bleakest of situations... you of all people...'
Kami-sama! Why couldn't she forget what the senshi had told her from the other side of the door?
A misunderstanding? Chiba Mamoru just didn't get jealous. He would not get upset over something as
silly as this, surely, and how could he possibly think that she and Rei were arguing about Seiya?
No.
They were just lies. Just misguided attempts to cheer her up. Did they even know the truth? Didn't they
see that he didn't want her enough? Didn't love her as much as he'd always claimed he did? So what
if there was a billion to one chance that they were right? She wasn't betting on that one against that billion.
Anyways, it didn't matter...
'Say that he doesn't love you... but... you *love* him... the most amazing feeling... that's all that
matters... bet on love...'
Stop! Why did she keep hearing him in her head? He knew she couldn't handle it. Why was he asking
her to face *him* again? Why was he asking her to get her heart stepped on one more time?
'... welcome the pain... just to take that one chance...'
Onegai... dame... dame...
'Onegai, all I ask is don't be a coward... just... one... chance... all i ask... don't be a coward... you are the
strongest person I've ever met...'
... so prove it.
Usako...
He traced the lines of the beautiful face staring back at him from behind the glass. This was his favorite
picture of her. Her eyes... they said so much, they had seen so much and yet her smile was brighter than the
sun... she was so beautiful it hurt to look at her.
'I was a jerk to the woman I love. How did I let myself be so cruel to her? All these years she's been
teaching me how to love, how to open up to people. I gave my heart saying I wanted nothing in return,
claiming that I'd learned how to love unconditionally, telling her that the scars from all those years
alone were gone.
'Yet when I got scared I became that lonely seven year old again. All her work undone... because no
matter how much I changed, how much I tried to change, inside there was that seed of doubt, that fear
that I'd lose it all, in other words, lose *her*. You can't grow if there's something holding you back... and
I reverted to my old self, lashing out at my love to protect myself. Why couldn't I let her be happy? It
must have been so hard for her to make that decision... and all she was doing was being honest with
me... she couldn't lead me on when she loved Seiya instead.'
Chiba Mamoru would have beat himself on the head if it he had the energy. Or the will really. He barely
could lift his head from the picture frame in his shaking hand. Lucky for him his healing ability seemed
to cover hangovers and headaches that came from crying all night. Unfortunately, it also sobered him
up a little too quickly. So he'd given up on that escape from reality. Then there came the self-loathing for
hurting his darling Usako in any way so he just welcomed the pain that he'd been trying to avoid with
the beer. Who needed alcohol to screw up their lives when they could do all the screwing up
themselves? Anyways, he'd never really liked that stuff.
With some reluctance he set the picture frame down. These past two weeks he'd spent staring at the
wall, almost reveling in the aching pain he felt in his chest at the thought of her. Because it seemed that
he couldn't feel. Without her light there was an emptiness inside that would only go away when the
pain sunk in.
During the break up a few years ago, staying away from her hurt like hell but at least he knew she still
wanted him. He knew that all he had to do was say the word and she'd come running. And he could
watch her from afar. Before they were together, in the two lifetimes he'd spent longing for her just the
sight of her had been enough. Living with the memory of her smile, her touch, her kiss... it had been
torture. But he could survive somehow. Now he didn't have the comfort of her love, of knowing that the
only reason she wasn't with him was because he was protecting her. Loving and protecting her. That was
his life. She was his life. And surely he had made her miserable.
Suddenly, in the midst of his self pity trip, he felt a rush of wind and a figure in black appeared, then
blurred, turning into a slightly lanky, dark haired man. He didn't bother to act surprised, feeling almost
too apathetic to feel anything about this random visit, and he dully cocked his head towards the
intruder.
"You do realize that coming here wasn't exactly the brightest idea you ever had, don't you? I'm feeling
very much like beating you to a pulp."
The cocked his head, "Why?"
Giving him a disbelieving look, Mamoru narrowed his eyes. But before he said a word something flickered
in his eyes and he paused, all his anger leaving him as he lowered his eyes to the ground.
Seiya nodded in understanding, saying, "She's not yours and it's not your decision whether she chooses
you or with me. Nice to know that you're not going to get all hothead and leave me with a few broken
bones."
Mamoru's eyes wouldn't leave the ground as he muttered, "So what are you doing here? Here to gloat?"
Seiya sighed, "Actually, I'm here to throw in the towel. You won. I lost. Not that there was any contest,
despite what you're obviously thinking."
He leaned casually against the wall, ignoring Mamoru's doubtful look.
"You know, I think I'm breaking some kind of rule here, trying to reason with you," he continued.
"Setsuna's gonna have my head on a platter by the end of the day, I swear. She keeps saying all the
senshi can't interfere for some reason. Though they all thought you'd disappeared. Funny how none of
them thought to try entering your apartment through your balcony and seeing if someone was home.
Look, I know that this is between the two of you so I'm butting out. I think I just needed to do something.
Even if she doesn't love me it still kills me to see her so miserable."
Ignoring Mamoru's troubled looks and confusion, Seiya glanced at his watch, sighing dramatically, "I
probably can't stay longer or say more without a certain green haired senshi coming in and dead
screaming my head off. So I'll get to the point. I'm just here to say that if you don't let her explain then,
well, you know she has my number. Ja ne, Mamoru-san."
Feeling in need of a dramatic exit, he leaped out the window, leaving a blank Chiba Mamoru staring
out after him as he transformed in midair.
After what felt like barely two seconds of contemplating Seiya's odd visit, he felt something. A tug.
He hadn't felt his connection with her since she'd fled his apartment who knows how long ago yet suddenly
he felt a twinge in his heart. Whatever it was, it gave him an indescribably powerful urge to see her, to make
things right, to apologize for blaming her for his rotten lot in life.
Only moments after Seiya's exit another dark figure could be seen leaping out into the night.
She didn't know why she knew he'd show. She just did. It felt like something inside her had called to him
and now for some reason she felt sure that he would answer. As she sat there, wincing at the bright
sunlight that rudely penetrated the storm clouds that seemed to follow her around, Usagi shivered despite her
warm surroundings. It took a bit of adjusting to, being outside after weeks of a taking hiatus from life. It didn't
help that she felt incredibly wired, on edge as her foolish heart pumped in its eagerness to see him again.
to be continued....
Ok, I'm pretty rusty right now and I did say that I'll probably fix this chapter up a bit later, to what extent even I
don't know, so any constructive criticism won't kill me. I never claimed to be an English major! (actually, that was
one of my not so wonderful subjects in high school ^_^;)
As for the major angsty-ness, I always felt that it'd be nice for Usagi and Mamoru to work out a few
issues. My main goal is to make them define their relationship without the million outside factors they
always face and to address Mamoru's insecurities since Usagi's were dealt w/ already during the break
up, more or less... heh, these two have issues. At least in my fic! I mean, in the anime it's like, they just
know that they love each other. I want some effort here! Have them you know, try to tell each other for
once.
PS. i realize that parents in general wouldn't give up that easily on their kid if she's in pain.... it's just in SM
fics they're always like that and i figured that i could take that liberty.
so discouraging! It was just too depressing trying to rewrite it. My attempts sucked so bad. I just
needed a break from it. But now I'm able to improve upon my previous ideas.
So, yeah, I've changed things a bit. I even added Seiya in a part (hope there's no Seiya haters out there).
And it's a huge improvement on this big senshi meeting filler part I'd written in the first version.
Oh, and if it gets a bit choppy at parts, blame it on me reading too many of eternal angel's fics. I'm trying to
go for that kind of artistic style, and I've never been great at it but it fit the scene and I hope I pulled it off
well enough for it not to fry your brains.
PLEASE READ: This is only part of a chapter. I'd intended to post the finished product all in one chapter
but I felt bad for promising to finish it centuries ago. So I won't make any promises about the last half. Also,
since I'm not done with the second half of this I probably will change a lot of what's in here, it's really like a
rough, rough draft. So you can give me advice or negative feedback if you want. I'm seriously considering
cutting out or changing the last half. It's kind of just filler stuff right now. I'm sure you'll notice the lack of
angsty-ness in this one but I felt like making it more about apathy and giving up on life than about wallowing
in absolute misery. But hey, if you want angsty I can try for angsty. So opinions please! Do you
guys want Seiya to have a big part or small one? Take advantage of this, I'm normally not so open to
suggestions! But I'm really just kinda up in the air about how I want this chapter to go and am feeling pretty
uncomfortable about the flow since I'm using of bit of eternal angel's style.
Tomorrow
by moonangel
ch 2a out of 2
"You don't look too happy."
Silence.
"Ok bad joke. But Odango, I'm worried about you. We all are... *sigh* fine, be that way. You know I
can only stay a week longer. The princess needs me back soon but I can't just leave with you here in this
state!"
Seiya sighed. It was a bit frustrating trying to have a serious conversation with a door. Then again,
this was the closest anyone had gotten to Tsukino Usagi in the past two weeks. She'd simply refused
to come out and her parents, despite being overwhelmed with worry, had been a bit miffed that not one
of their often used and consistently heeded threats had gotten through to her and had backed off
completely. They decided to just put food outside her door during meal times and hoped she'd come
out sooner or later, realizing with a great deal of frustration that this was out of their hands. Seiya had a
feeling that on some level they were starting to understand that there were some things about their
daughter that they could never control.
Despite Rei's protests Seiya believed that he should be the one to get through to her. He and the
senshi knew what had happened after Rei'd filled them in. But when they tried to explain to Usagi she
hadn't listened. Well, it seemed that she hadn't. It was hard to tell when one was conversing with a door.
So after the last hour or so of arguing with an inanimate object, Seiya was starting to get a bit peeved.
Another equally annoying fact was that Mamoru had disappeared off the face of the Earth, ironic since
it was his planet. So Seiya couldn't try to explain the situation to him. Not that Mamoru would listen.
The man was too stubborn to listen to reason. And he wasn't any greater at controlling his jealousy,
not that he ever tried to. But Setsuna insisted that even if Mamoru would believe him, this was
something that the two moping lovers needed to work out by themselves (that seemed to be all she was
willing to tell them, despite their questions about her knowledge of the situation considering that she
had triggered this turn of events). So yeah, they were so supposed to let the couple handle things on
their own... Though a little push wouldn't hurt.
Staring with defeat at the stupid door that kept him from the woman he loved, he tried one last time,
deciding to stop with the whining and begging. He needed to stop trying to coax her out and just... talk,
make one big last ditch effort. She had to be listening.
"Odango, you love him. Any idiot with his head screwed on backwards could tell. And he loves you.
We've been through this and I'm not going to waste any more time trying to convince you of that fact.
I'm sick of this. After days and days of coming here, arguing the same points, I'm just getting so tired.
It's just getting harder and harder to think of the right words that'll do the job. So I'm done throwing
that 'true love', 'destiny' and 'soulmate' bull your way. But I just want to make one last try..."
"... as I said, you love him..."
A desolate figure sat on her rumpled bed, hugging her legs, seemingly oblivious to the frustrated young
man standing outside her door. If anyone was to see her they'd wonder if she was a statue, unmoving,
untouchable...
"... more than I've ever seen anyone love anyone before..."
She stared blankly out the window, wisps of ghostly, silver blond hair flowing around her in the cold
breeze that blowing in behind her open curtains.
"... and it just amazes me, every time, seeing that look in your eyes that tells me you're thinking about
him. I never knew it was possible for anyone to love so much...."
She shivered slightly in the breeze, her thin clothes impossibly wrinkled, her eyes impossibly red and
swollen.
"... Odango... say what you seem to believe is right. Say that there's a chance, no
matter how nonexistent I believe it to be, that he doesn't love you..."
Her lips trembled.
"... I know it's the scariest thing in the world. I know how your heart has shattered and you can't even
begin to even look for the pieces, much less try to start picking them up. And the world has fallen
apart and the sunniest skies only seem to mock your mood..."
She seemed so helpless against the cold. You'd think she was just a child, until you looked into her
eyes...
"... but inside, you know there's still a chance. Even if it's just the tiniest chance, you know it's there.
And you push it away and ignore it, afraid to put your tattered heart out on your sleeve one last time,
knowing that taking that chance only to lose it could destroy you forever. Because deep down you know
that though you deny it, it's the only thing keeping you alive..."
Those sad blue eyes shimmered.
"... but ask yourself this: why are still you holding on? Why are you still clinging to that chance? I
know you'd tell me that if you took the chance that he might actually love you and found out he didn't
you'll just die right there. Losing him was far too much, right?"
A lone tear spilled down a porcelain cheek.
"... Odango, I think I'm starting to realize something. This is real. This, what you two have, it's forever.
You two love each other! And I think that just may be all that really matters. That that's all that's ever
mattered. You *love* him. And that's the most amazing feeling in the world. You of all people should
know that. So now that you're being all depressed are you going to tell me that you'd give it all up, all
those happy times and wonderful feelings, just to avoid this pain? I know you Odango Atama. You
wouldn't. It's eating away at you but you'll never give it up. So I'm asking you why you're giving up now.
There's a chance. I'll be honest with you, if I believed just for a second that there was even a speck of a
chance that you might love me I'd go for it, welcome the pain, just to take that one chance on it... I'd give
everything for it..."
Her hand clutched at her heart.
"... Onegai, all I ask of you is don't be a coward. That isn't you. You've heard us. Don't tell me you
haven't. You heard our little explanation for what he said and yeah, I know it sounds lame. And that just
made it easy to toss it aside as an attempt by the senshi trying to make their friend happy and keep the
happy future they were promised, or whatever you choose to think. But please, just listen. Take the
chance. Kami-sama, you know what I always loved about you was that you've always preached your
heart out about love. Even in the bleakest situation I always believed that you of all people would bet on
love. You are the strongest person I've ever met. Onegai, don't let me down Odango..."
There was silence outside until she could hear a defeated sigh and the sound of footsteps retreating
down the stairs. For a long while after that Tsukino Usagi stared at her bedroom door.
It was so sunny outside it killed her. To think, just the simple warmth of the sun's rays used to be
enough to make everything in the world seem right. Yet, these days the blistering heat of that annoying
bright spot in the sky hardly mattered to this deathly pale girl who had cooped herself up in her room for
two weeks, living off the food her parents left at the door. It was funny how they couldn't deal with the
depressed, mature Usagi. They were at a complete loss. Unfortunately, it seemed everyone else knew
what had happened, more or less. Did Pluto tell them? Did Rei figured it out?
Did they find out from Mamoru?
... and did she have to mention his name? Not that it should matter since he was all she ever thought about.
But somehow just thinking his name brought on an extra wave of pain.
Why did Seiya always know how to get through to her? Why couldn't she just forget what he'd said? Why
couldn't she just cry her heart out like every day in who knows how long she'd been in there...
'You preach.. about love... Even in the bleakest of situations... you of all people...'
Kami-sama! Why couldn't she forget what the senshi had told her from the other side of the door?
A misunderstanding? Chiba Mamoru just didn't get jealous. He would not get upset over something as
silly as this, surely, and how could he possibly think that she and Rei were arguing about Seiya?
No.
They were just lies. Just misguided attempts to cheer her up. Did they even know the truth? Didn't they
see that he didn't want her enough? Didn't love her as much as he'd always claimed he did? So what
if there was a billion to one chance that they were right? She wasn't betting on that one against that billion.
Anyways, it didn't matter...
'Say that he doesn't love you... but... you *love* him... the most amazing feeling... that's all that
matters... bet on love...'
Stop! Why did she keep hearing him in her head? He knew she couldn't handle it. Why was he asking
her to face *him* again? Why was he asking her to get her heart stepped on one more time?
'... welcome the pain... just to take that one chance...'
Onegai... dame... dame...
'Onegai, all I ask is don't be a coward... just... one... chance... all i ask... don't be a coward... you are the
strongest person I've ever met...'
... so prove it.
Usako...
He traced the lines of the beautiful face staring back at him from behind the glass. This was his favorite
picture of her. Her eyes... they said so much, they had seen so much and yet her smile was brighter than the
sun... she was so beautiful it hurt to look at her.
'I was a jerk to the woman I love. How did I let myself be so cruel to her? All these years she's been
teaching me how to love, how to open up to people. I gave my heart saying I wanted nothing in return,
claiming that I'd learned how to love unconditionally, telling her that the scars from all those years
alone were gone.
'Yet when I got scared I became that lonely seven year old again. All her work undone... because no
matter how much I changed, how much I tried to change, inside there was that seed of doubt, that fear
that I'd lose it all, in other words, lose *her*. You can't grow if there's something holding you back... and
I reverted to my old self, lashing out at my love to protect myself. Why couldn't I let her be happy? It
must have been so hard for her to make that decision... and all she was doing was being honest with
me... she couldn't lead me on when she loved Seiya instead.'
Chiba Mamoru would have beat himself on the head if it he had the energy. Or the will really. He barely
could lift his head from the picture frame in his shaking hand. Lucky for him his healing ability seemed
to cover hangovers and headaches that came from crying all night. Unfortunately, it also sobered him
up a little too quickly. So he'd given up on that escape from reality. Then there came the self-loathing for
hurting his darling Usako in any way so he just welcomed the pain that he'd been trying to avoid with
the beer. Who needed alcohol to screw up their lives when they could do all the screwing up
themselves? Anyways, he'd never really liked that stuff.
With some reluctance he set the picture frame down. These past two weeks he'd spent staring at the
wall, almost reveling in the aching pain he felt in his chest at the thought of her. Because it seemed that
he couldn't feel. Without her light there was an emptiness inside that would only go away when the
pain sunk in.
During the break up a few years ago, staying away from her hurt like hell but at least he knew she still
wanted him. He knew that all he had to do was say the word and she'd come running. And he could
watch her from afar. Before they were together, in the two lifetimes he'd spent longing for her just the
sight of her had been enough. Living with the memory of her smile, her touch, her kiss... it had been
torture. But he could survive somehow. Now he didn't have the comfort of her love, of knowing that the
only reason she wasn't with him was because he was protecting her. Loving and protecting her. That was
his life. She was his life. And surely he had made her miserable.
Suddenly, in the midst of his self pity trip, he felt a rush of wind and a figure in black appeared, then
blurred, turning into a slightly lanky, dark haired man. He didn't bother to act surprised, feeling almost
too apathetic to feel anything about this random visit, and he dully cocked his head towards the
intruder.
"You do realize that coming here wasn't exactly the brightest idea you ever had, don't you? I'm feeling
very much like beating you to a pulp."
The cocked his head, "Why?"
Giving him a disbelieving look, Mamoru narrowed his eyes. But before he said a word something flickered
in his eyes and he paused, all his anger leaving him as he lowered his eyes to the ground.
Seiya nodded in understanding, saying, "She's not yours and it's not your decision whether she chooses
you or with me. Nice to know that you're not going to get all hothead and leave me with a few broken
bones."
Mamoru's eyes wouldn't leave the ground as he muttered, "So what are you doing here? Here to gloat?"
Seiya sighed, "Actually, I'm here to throw in the towel. You won. I lost. Not that there was any contest,
despite what you're obviously thinking."
He leaned casually against the wall, ignoring Mamoru's doubtful look.
"You know, I think I'm breaking some kind of rule here, trying to reason with you," he continued.
"Setsuna's gonna have my head on a platter by the end of the day, I swear. She keeps saying all the
senshi can't interfere for some reason. Though they all thought you'd disappeared. Funny how none of
them thought to try entering your apartment through your balcony and seeing if someone was home.
Look, I know that this is between the two of you so I'm butting out. I think I just needed to do something.
Even if she doesn't love me it still kills me to see her so miserable."
Ignoring Mamoru's troubled looks and confusion, Seiya glanced at his watch, sighing dramatically, "I
probably can't stay longer or say more without a certain green haired senshi coming in and dead
screaming my head off. So I'll get to the point. I'm just here to say that if you don't let her explain then,
well, you know she has my number. Ja ne, Mamoru-san."
Feeling in need of a dramatic exit, he leaped out the window, leaving a blank Chiba Mamoru staring
out after him as he transformed in midair.
After what felt like barely two seconds of contemplating Seiya's odd visit, he felt something. A tug.
He hadn't felt his connection with her since she'd fled his apartment who knows how long ago yet suddenly
he felt a twinge in his heart. Whatever it was, it gave him an indescribably powerful urge to see her, to make
things right, to apologize for blaming her for his rotten lot in life.
Only moments after Seiya's exit another dark figure could be seen leaping out into the night.
She didn't know why she knew he'd show. She just did. It felt like something inside her had called to him
and now for some reason she felt sure that he would answer. As she sat there, wincing at the bright
sunlight that rudely penetrated the storm clouds that seemed to follow her around, Usagi shivered despite her
warm surroundings. It took a bit of adjusting to, being outside after weeks of a taking hiatus from life. It didn't
help that she felt incredibly wired, on edge as her foolish heart pumped in its eagerness to see him again.
to be continued....
Ok, I'm pretty rusty right now and I did say that I'll probably fix this chapter up a bit later, to what extent even I
don't know, so any constructive criticism won't kill me. I never claimed to be an English major! (actually, that was
one of my not so wonderful subjects in high school ^_^;)
As for the major angsty-ness, I always felt that it'd be nice for Usagi and Mamoru to work out a few
issues. My main goal is to make them define their relationship without the million outside factors they
always face and to address Mamoru's insecurities since Usagi's were dealt w/ already during the break
up, more or less... heh, these two have issues. At least in my fic! I mean, in the anime it's like, they just
know that they love each other. I want some effort here! Have them you know, try to tell each other for
once.
PS. i realize that parents in general wouldn't give up that easily on their kid if she's in pain.... it's just in SM
fics they're always like that and i figured that i could take that liberty.