Title: Stay Anyway 9/?

Author: Amber (Ambino1111@prodigy.net)

Author's Note: Josh & Donna goodness and Ainsley are coming up in a few parts.

Disclaimers & other notes in Part 1

Previously, in Stay Anyway…

Part 1…

… Josh and I are working our butts off on the latest Health Care Package, an amendment to H.R. 206.

… The President, CJ, Toby, and Charlie are in China until Monday evening.

… Josh lets out a snort. He wiggles his index finger in my direction. "You

were engaged to this woman, you haven't seen her in years, and all you can

say is 'she got a haircut'?" "Well, she did," I defend, looking down at my hands briefly. "That, and a baby."

Part 2…

… I can remember Sam leaving as if it were yesterday, yet... it's been over three years and, at times, seems decades longer.

… She shifts in her seat suddenly and thrusts a manicured hand in my direction. "I'm sorry, I didn't introduce myself. I'm Donnatella Moss, Josh Lyman's assistant." I chortle in amused sympathy, which causes Donna to grin. "I somehow doubt Josh's personality has changed much in three years." I pause. "You're a very brave woman."

… The door opens again and I sigh. Gathering my courage I stand, ready to face my ex-fiancee.

Part 3…

… Lisa and I are staring at each other, and Donna coughs slightly, backing into the Roosevelt Room. "I'll be in here, if you, uh, well, we'll be here." Then she's gone, and it's just Lisa and me... and Alex.

… Why does politics always come between Lisa and me?

Part 4…

… His face brightens and he smiles one of his killer smiles. I always loved his perfect white teeth, and it has nothing to do with professional appreciation.

… "I - I... we... why does everyone think we should date? Donna is my friend and a fine assistant, and we are both professionals."

… "You can both be professionals and be in love," I tell him truthfully. He doesn't meet my eyes.

… My body tenses immediately. "Sam, I don't want to do this right now," My voice carries with it a silent plea. Sam either misses or ignores it. "Lisa, please. I think we need to talk about it."

… Then Sam coughs and the spell is broken, and he leads the way to Josh's office.

Part 5…

… I stand up, more furious than I should be but unable to help it. "No. You know what? No! We're not getting into this. I know you mean well, but frankly, this is none of your goddamn business. Yes, I was engaged to Lisa, but that was before the campaign and has no relevance to anything. And unless I express them verbally, my thoughts and feelings are mine and mine alone. I'm sick and tired of being 'Poor Little Innocent Sam' whose life's purpose is to amuse the White House Staff with tales of his misadventures.

… Oh great. This is fitting; this is perfect. I take it back - the last thing I want to do right now is talk to Lisa.

… "Oh, Sam," Lisa sighs. I look up at her as she gestures vaguely with her left hand. "This - this was never supposed to happen; this wasn't supposed to be us... How did we get here?"

Part 6…

… I'm standing still, staring at this man in a most unprofessional manner but unable to stop. I never believed in love at first sight, but... "Uh, I'm Sam Seaborn. I have an eleven-thirty appointment to fill some cavities?" He sounds like he's trying to jog my memory, and he has.

… He laughs, and I can tell that despite his cavity problems he has a terrific smile. I wonder if he uses whitening toothpaste...?

… "I thed, 'ow woo fwee Fwiday night foh dinnah?'" I feel Helen's eyes boring a hole into the side of my head as I force my brain to respond coherently. "Y-yes. Yes, I am."

Part 7…

… "It's not lying; it's misdirection," Josh insists. "No wonder you're a politician," I mutter playfully. I can almost see his grin. "You're going to be here to help me, right? You're flying in on Thursday?"

… "Hi, Lisa," I say, walking up to her while discreetly tucking the paper in my back jeans pocket. She raises her eyebrows at my apparently _in_discreet actions, and I answer her unasked question with a kiss.

… She's going to love her surprise party.

Part 8…

… So why does my mind torment me so? If I _know_ that Sam is faithful, then why does my stupid, annoying, doubtful brain keep pointing out clues?

… It's 7:00 on Thursday, and I'm about to confront the woman with whom Sam has been cheating on me. What could I possibly be thinking?

… Sam's having an affair with a man?

… I have never felt so horrible in my entire life.

*****

"Relationships--of all kinds--are like sand held in your hand. Held loosely, with an open hand, the sand remains where it is. The minute you close your hand and squeeze tightly to hold on, the sand trickles through your fingers. You may hold onto some of it, but most will be spilled. A relationship is like that. Held loosely, with respect and freedom for the other person, it is likely to remain intact. But hold too tightly, too possessively, and the relationship slips away and is lost."

-Kaleel Jamison

*****

"Did you enjoy the movie?" I ask, taking out the keys to the apartment.

"It was all right," Lisa decides as I jingle the keys loudly. That's their cue.

"That's good," I say before swinging open the door.

"SURPRISE!"

I watch happily as Lisa's emotions play out openly on her face. Surprise, temporary confusion, understanding, happiness. Now she's laughing and hugging me.

"Sam, how - why- when? My birthday isn't for another three months!"

"That's the surprise!" I declare cheerfully. I must say- I'm pretty proud of myself. I lean down and kiss her forehead, spinning her around to face her guests. "You really didn't suspect anything?"

I can't tell if she heard me with all the noise and confusion, so I circle around and stand in front of her. "You really didn't suspect anything?"

The blood drains from her face and she freezes, staring at something just beyond my right shoulder. I hope she's not sick.

"Are you okay, honey?" I inquire, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder. She jumps a mile at my touch.

Finally, I turn around and follow her gaze to see what has shocked her. All I can see is my best friend, Josh Lyman.

"Oh!" I exclaim, smacking my head. "Lisa, this is Josh Lyman, my best friend and planner-in-crime. He helped me set everything up. Josh, this is Lisa Prescott."

I notice the odd looks on both their faces as they slowly shake hands. Now I'm utterly confused.

"Have you guys met before?"

Both jerk their heads to look at me, then back at each other.

"Uh..."

"You could say that."

"N-no. I wouldn't say that."

Suddenly, Mr. Prescott appears by our side to hug his daughter.

"Lisa! I'm so glad to see you. Come in the kitchen; Mom's been looking for you."

I watch as Lisa's led away. When she begins talking to her mom, I turn around to face Josh.

He's gone.

"Josh?" I appeal to the room, scanning the heads for his familiar reddish-brown hair. I look just in time to see the front door closing. Without hesitation, I find myself jogging past party-goers to the door. The hallway is dim and empty, but I can hear his footsteps echoing around the corner.

"Josh!" I yell, hurrying towards the sound. I round the corner and come face-to-face with my best friend. He refuses to meet my eyes.

"Josh!" I exclaim, exasperated. He flinches but still stares at his feet.

"Hiya, Sam," He mumbles. I roll my eyes.

"Josh, where are you going?"

"Home... well, the hotel."

"But... why? Josh, what - what the - what happened in there?"

"I just, uh, I thought it best if I left."

"Why?"

He shakes his head almost imperceptibly. I cross my arms over my chest and clear my throat. "Have you two met before?"

"...Maybe..."

"Maybe?" My voice squeaks. "When?"

"Nevermind."

"Nevermind?!? Joshua Lyman, what is going on here?"

He waits a beat, then looks up, still unwilling to meet my eyes. "Why don't you ask Lisa?" He says quietly. Somehow his words sting more than his delivery.

I take a breath, trying to calm my nerves. Why is my heart racing? Why am I feeling so... angry? So... jealous? I have no reason to be.

"I'm not asking Lisa right now; I'm asking you."

Josh takes a step backwards, as surprised as I am by the venomous quality of my voice. He swallows loudly and finally meets my eyes.

"Ask. Lisa."

"No, dammit," I start to pace the width of the hallway, trying to collect my thoughts. "I - I want - I..." I stop and spin around to face him, finger pointing at his chest. I have to know. "Did you two..." I swallow the lump in my throat. "Did you sleep together?"

"What?!?"

"Did you?" I growl. I'm beginning to scare myself.

"Sam-"

I grab him by the collar and pull him towards me. I'm out of control, but, for some reason, I can't stop myself.

There's actual fear in Josh's eyes.

"Don't lie to me, Josh."

"I'm not," He defends. Gradually the fear dissipates; anger in its place. He tries to pull away, but I don't allow it.

"Tell me the truth."

We lock eyes for a moment before he yanks himself free of my grasp. His eyes never leave mine.

"Sam, you are losing your mind."

With that, he turns and continues down the hallway. I stand still, watching as he waits for the elevator.

"Did you?" I call out, cringing at the desperate, heartsick tone of my plea.

Josh doesn't turn around. The elevator dings, and the doors slide open. He waits a moment before stepping in and slowly turning around.

"We didn't sleep together, Sam."

I watch the doors slide shut and sigh. Then I spin around and punch the wall as hard as I can with my fist.

TBC