Title: Family
Author: T. C.
Rating: R for violence
Pairing: Angel/Cordelia
Summary: Angel finds his son and the reunion is not joyous.
Disclaimer: The characters of Angel belong to Joss Whedon, Twentieth
Century Fox and the WB.
Spoilers: This season of Angel is spoiled up to the current episodes
and I've also used some of the rumors floating around as to
what is going to happen in the future eps and the season
finale.
***********************************************************************
The boy was filthy, rags and dirt clung to him like a second skin.
Cordelia's heart immediately melted. She had seen a lot of street kids
since she had moved to L. A. - especially when she had lived in the
less desirable areas of the city - but there was something about this
one. She crossed the street, dodging the bumpers of angry motorists
and ignoring the blaring horns, and stopped in front of him. Unlike
most street kids, he didn't shy away or run. Instead he stared up at
her with an unusually intense gaze for a child so young. He reminded
her of someone.
Cordelia held out her hand. "Hello, I'm Cordelia. Are you hungry?"
The child nodded and grabbed her hand. "What's your name?" The boy
only shook his head. "Oh, not talking, hey? I understand that. I'm
going to take you to the office where I work. It's a really big hotel
with a huge kitchen. We'll order out...unless you toaster waffles. I
make great toaster waffles." Cordelia kept up the one-sided chatter
until they reached the Hyperion. She hesitated at the front door,
suddenly unsure about bringing a small boy into the hotel so soon after
Angel had lost Connor. True, the child wasn't a baby, but still.
"You know what, I changed my mind. Why don't we go back to my place.
I have a t.v. and we can find some cartoons."
The boy wouldn't budge from the front step. He looked up at the door
with a stubborn glare. Cordelia tugged on his arm one more time.
"Come on, Scooby-Doo, Roadrunner, anything you want to watch - as long
as it's PG."
"It's okay, Cordelia." The door swung open, but Angel stayed behind it
in the shadows. "You can bring him in."
This time the boy went willingly when Cordelia led him into the darkened
lobby of the Hyperion. The door closed behind them, further deepening
the shadows. "I found him on the street. He won't tell me his name."
Cordelia turned to look at Angel, her apology clearly visible in her
eyes. "I had to help him."
"Of course." Angel moved toward them. He smiled at the boy. "Hi, I'm
Angel." The boy shied away from the much larger man, cuddling up close
to Cordelia's leg. Angel looked up at Cordelia, missing the flash of
hate that burned through the boys dark brown eyes. "Vision?"
"No." Cordelia reached out and brushed the hair out of the boy's eyes.
It was matted and caked with dirt. "You, young man, have an
appointment with water and a bathtub. Fred, can you call and order
some food please?"
Fred skipped forward. "Sure." She bent down toward the boy, a big
exuberant smile lighting up her face. "What do you like to eat? I
like tacos."
Connor turned his head into Cordelia's hip. She smelled nice and he
liked her. She made him feel safe and warm. When he left this place,
he would take her with him. Holtz had told him about her - had said
that she had acted as his mother, but had failed to protect him from
his father - but it was obvious that Holtz had been wrong about her.
His father had blinded her to his true nature, but when it was revealed
he would save her. She would love him and be his mother again.
"Tacos sound great, Fred." Cordelia led the boy upstairs. She knew
what she was doing - taking care of this boy in a way that she hoped
someone was taking care of Connor - creating good karma. She started
the water running in the huge old clawfoot bathtub and adjusted the
temperature until it was comfortably warm. The boy peered into the tub
and then looked up at her with terrified eyes. "It's okay. Trust me,
you'll feel better once you're all cleaned up." The boy still looked
wary and a stubborn line had set in his features. Cordelia sighed.
This was going to take a while.
*****
Angel slowly crept up the stairway. He could hear the sounds of
laughter and water splashing. He stopped and leaned against the wall,
swallowing the lump that formed in his throat. He had never voiced
any of his fantasies concerning Cordelia and his son, but he had
thought about a scene much like this one. Cordelia acting as Connor's
mother - washing his hair, making sure he cleaned behind his ears and
brushed his teeth. But this little boy wasn't his son and he had to
be careful not to confuse them. Connor was gone, lost, and he was
never coming back. Angel pushed himself from the wall and stepped
forward to knock on the bathroom door. "Cordy, I have some clothes for
the boy, Gunn went out and bought some. And the food's here."
"Okay." Cordelia opened the bathroom door. She grinned at Angel and
he couldn't help but smile back. Her clothes were dotted with water
marks and soapsuds clung to her cheek. She took the clothes from
Angel. "We'll be down in a few minutes."
"Has he told you anything yet?"
"No, but he has...."
"Momma!" the boy called out, interrupting Cordelia.
A pink blush bloomed on her cheeks and Cordelia dropped her gaze,
refusing to meet Angel's. "He started calling me that and...well, I
tried to explain...."
"It's okay, Cordelia. I understand." Angel squeezed her shoulder.
His hand lingered. He wanted to pull her into a hug, but his feelings
for her and her feelings for Groo stopped him.
"Momma," Connor called again, but this time it came out more as a
growl than an excited yell. He didn't like seeing his father touch
her. Connor climbed out of the tub, sloshing water onto the floor.
He would protect her from the evil vampire who called himself his
father, even if he had to kill him.
Cordelia turned and caught the charging child up in her arms. "You
must be starved, young man. Let's get you dressed and then we'll go
down and eat." Cordelia pulled the blue t-shirt Gunn had bought over
the boy's head. When his head appeared again, Angel was gone. His
chance to kill his father had passed. There would be another one.
*****
In silent agreement, Fred, Gunn, and Lorne found excuses to leave the
hotel after they had eaten lunch. Lorne even persuaded Groo to go
along with him - saying something about wanting news of his family. It
was just Cordelia and Angel. And the little boy. Cordelia sat on one
of the comfortable plush sofas in the lobby, the boy cuddled in her
lap. She curled his hair around her fingers as he slept peacefully.
"He needs a haircut."
Angel didn't say anything. He knew that Cordelia had been hurt by
Connor's kidnaping. She had put aside her pain and helped him deal
with his and now she was repressing it and lavishing all the love she
had built up for Connor on this little boy. Angel wished he could do
the same, it would be so much easier, but it wouldn't last. The pain
would surface eventually and Cordelia needed to deal with it now. "He
can't stay, Cordelia."
Now it was Cordelia's turn to remain silent. She hugged the boy
closer, she didn't want to give him up. She had a chance to be a
mother to Connor - or at least a glorified aunt - but she had messed
that up. She had went to Mexico on vacation with her boyfriend instead
of protecting her child. This could be her second chance. This boy
needed her. He needed her to be strong and do the right thing instead
of falling back on selfish tendencies. "We should call Children's
Services and have someone pick him up." Cordelia gave him one last
squeeze and then shifted him off her lap. She stood up and brushed a
kiss on his forehead.
The soft touch of her lips hardened Connor's resolve. He would not be
separated from his mother again. If his father thought that he could
send him away into another hell dimension, he had thought wrong.
Connor's eyes opened. His mother and father were standing in the
office, talking. His mother started to cry and his father embraced
her. Connor slipped silently off the sofa and made his way to the
weapons cabinet. An assortment of sharp wooden stakes lay on the
bottom shelf. Connor chose the sharpest looking one. The lighter
wood of the point gleamed in the shadows of the room.
"Angel, I'm sorry...I shouldn't..." Cordelia sobbed in Angel's arms.
She held on to him, her arms wrapped around his shoulders, and finally
cried for the baby that she had lost too. She pushed herself away,
wiping at her eyes and putting the desk between them. "I'm being
selfish. You were Connor's father."
"You were his mother." Angel finally voiced the title that everyone
had silently given her. He looked up at Cordelia to gage her reaction
and was surprised by the horror on her face. "Cordelia." Angel
stepped toward her.
"No!" Cordelia yelled. She jumped across the desk, scattering the
papers over the floor. With a strength she didn't know she possessed,
Cordelia shoved Angel out of the way and caught the boy in her arms.
They fell to the floor, Cordelia twisting so that she landed on the
bottom.
"Momma! Momma, no," the boy cried. He buried his head in the crook
of her neck. "No, Momma, Daddy's supposed to die. He's a bad man.
He's evil, Momma. You shouldn't protect him. Holtz said...he said..."
At the mention of Holtz's name, Angel stiffened. He watched Cordelia
lift the boys head from her neck. "Connor?" Her voice was weak and
Angel shuddered as a thin trail of blood traced a line from the corner
of her mouth down her cheek. She was hurt.
And the sobbing boy in her arms was their son. Angel gently lifted
Connor off of Cordelia. The polished end of a stake was all that was
visible. The stake had been driven deep into her chest right between
her breasts. Angel fell to his knees beside her. There was nothing he
could do. "Cordelia." He caressed her hair and cradled her in his
arms. She moaned in pain, but kept her beautiful eyes focused on him.
"Cordelia, I love you. I should have said it before, but...I love
you. You're so strong and loving and...I don't know if I can do this.
Please, Cordy, don't leave me."
Cordelia felt the wetness of Angel's tears as he buried his head in
her neck much as his son had done. She could hear Connor crying
beside them. "I...love you...and Connor." Cordelia reached out and
lay her hand on Connor's head. He crawled back to his place on her
chest. It didn't matter, the pain was fading. "Look after your...son,
Angel."
Her smile was like the sun, it burned through him and lit up his
world. Angel raised his head in time to see it once more before her
eyes darkened and she went still, her heart giving out in a fluttery
thump. He hugged her and Connor tightly.
The End
Author: T. C.
Rating: R for violence
Pairing: Angel/Cordelia
Summary: Angel finds his son and the reunion is not joyous.
Disclaimer: The characters of Angel belong to Joss Whedon, Twentieth
Century Fox and the WB.
Spoilers: This season of Angel is spoiled up to the current episodes
and I've also used some of the rumors floating around as to
what is going to happen in the future eps and the season
finale.
***********************************************************************
The boy was filthy, rags and dirt clung to him like a second skin.
Cordelia's heart immediately melted. She had seen a lot of street kids
since she had moved to L. A. - especially when she had lived in the
less desirable areas of the city - but there was something about this
one. She crossed the street, dodging the bumpers of angry motorists
and ignoring the blaring horns, and stopped in front of him. Unlike
most street kids, he didn't shy away or run. Instead he stared up at
her with an unusually intense gaze for a child so young. He reminded
her of someone.
Cordelia held out her hand. "Hello, I'm Cordelia. Are you hungry?"
The child nodded and grabbed her hand. "What's your name?" The boy
only shook his head. "Oh, not talking, hey? I understand that. I'm
going to take you to the office where I work. It's a really big hotel
with a huge kitchen. We'll order out...unless you toaster waffles. I
make great toaster waffles." Cordelia kept up the one-sided chatter
until they reached the Hyperion. She hesitated at the front door,
suddenly unsure about bringing a small boy into the hotel so soon after
Angel had lost Connor. True, the child wasn't a baby, but still.
"You know what, I changed my mind. Why don't we go back to my place.
I have a t.v. and we can find some cartoons."
The boy wouldn't budge from the front step. He looked up at the door
with a stubborn glare. Cordelia tugged on his arm one more time.
"Come on, Scooby-Doo, Roadrunner, anything you want to watch - as long
as it's PG."
"It's okay, Cordelia." The door swung open, but Angel stayed behind it
in the shadows. "You can bring him in."
This time the boy went willingly when Cordelia led him into the darkened
lobby of the Hyperion. The door closed behind them, further deepening
the shadows. "I found him on the street. He won't tell me his name."
Cordelia turned to look at Angel, her apology clearly visible in her
eyes. "I had to help him."
"Of course." Angel moved toward them. He smiled at the boy. "Hi, I'm
Angel." The boy shied away from the much larger man, cuddling up close
to Cordelia's leg. Angel looked up at Cordelia, missing the flash of
hate that burned through the boys dark brown eyes. "Vision?"
"No." Cordelia reached out and brushed the hair out of the boy's eyes.
It was matted and caked with dirt. "You, young man, have an
appointment with water and a bathtub. Fred, can you call and order
some food please?"
Fred skipped forward. "Sure." She bent down toward the boy, a big
exuberant smile lighting up her face. "What do you like to eat? I
like tacos."
Connor turned his head into Cordelia's hip. She smelled nice and he
liked her. She made him feel safe and warm. When he left this place,
he would take her with him. Holtz had told him about her - had said
that she had acted as his mother, but had failed to protect him from
his father - but it was obvious that Holtz had been wrong about her.
His father had blinded her to his true nature, but when it was revealed
he would save her. She would love him and be his mother again.
"Tacos sound great, Fred." Cordelia led the boy upstairs. She knew
what she was doing - taking care of this boy in a way that she hoped
someone was taking care of Connor - creating good karma. She started
the water running in the huge old clawfoot bathtub and adjusted the
temperature until it was comfortably warm. The boy peered into the tub
and then looked up at her with terrified eyes. "It's okay. Trust me,
you'll feel better once you're all cleaned up." The boy still looked
wary and a stubborn line had set in his features. Cordelia sighed.
This was going to take a while.
*****
Angel slowly crept up the stairway. He could hear the sounds of
laughter and water splashing. He stopped and leaned against the wall,
swallowing the lump that formed in his throat. He had never voiced
any of his fantasies concerning Cordelia and his son, but he had
thought about a scene much like this one. Cordelia acting as Connor's
mother - washing his hair, making sure he cleaned behind his ears and
brushed his teeth. But this little boy wasn't his son and he had to
be careful not to confuse them. Connor was gone, lost, and he was
never coming back. Angel pushed himself from the wall and stepped
forward to knock on the bathroom door. "Cordy, I have some clothes for
the boy, Gunn went out and bought some. And the food's here."
"Okay." Cordelia opened the bathroom door. She grinned at Angel and
he couldn't help but smile back. Her clothes were dotted with water
marks and soapsuds clung to her cheek. She took the clothes from
Angel. "We'll be down in a few minutes."
"Has he told you anything yet?"
"No, but he has...."
"Momma!" the boy called out, interrupting Cordelia.
A pink blush bloomed on her cheeks and Cordelia dropped her gaze,
refusing to meet Angel's. "He started calling me that and...well, I
tried to explain...."
"It's okay, Cordelia. I understand." Angel squeezed her shoulder.
His hand lingered. He wanted to pull her into a hug, but his feelings
for her and her feelings for Groo stopped him.
"Momma," Connor called again, but this time it came out more as a
growl than an excited yell. He didn't like seeing his father touch
her. Connor climbed out of the tub, sloshing water onto the floor.
He would protect her from the evil vampire who called himself his
father, even if he had to kill him.
Cordelia turned and caught the charging child up in her arms. "You
must be starved, young man. Let's get you dressed and then we'll go
down and eat." Cordelia pulled the blue t-shirt Gunn had bought over
the boy's head. When his head appeared again, Angel was gone. His
chance to kill his father had passed. There would be another one.
*****
In silent agreement, Fred, Gunn, and Lorne found excuses to leave the
hotel after they had eaten lunch. Lorne even persuaded Groo to go
along with him - saying something about wanting news of his family. It
was just Cordelia and Angel. And the little boy. Cordelia sat on one
of the comfortable plush sofas in the lobby, the boy cuddled in her
lap. She curled his hair around her fingers as he slept peacefully.
"He needs a haircut."
Angel didn't say anything. He knew that Cordelia had been hurt by
Connor's kidnaping. She had put aside her pain and helped him deal
with his and now she was repressing it and lavishing all the love she
had built up for Connor on this little boy. Angel wished he could do
the same, it would be so much easier, but it wouldn't last. The pain
would surface eventually and Cordelia needed to deal with it now. "He
can't stay, Cordelia."
Now it was Cordelia's turn to remain silent. She hugged the boy
closer, she didn't want to give him up. She had a chance to be a
mother to Connor - or at least a glorified aunt - but she had messed
that up. She had went to Mexico on vacation with her boyfriend instead
of protecting her child. This could be her second chance. This boy
needed her. He needed her to be strong and do the right thing instead
of falling back on selfish tendencies. "We should call Children's
Services and have someone pick him up." Cordelia gave him one last
squeeze and then shifted him off her lap. She stood up and brushed a
kiss on his forehead.
The soft touch of her lips hardened Connor's resolve. He would not be
separated from his mother again. If his father thought that he could
send him away into another hell dimension, he had thought wrong.
Connor's eyes opened. His mother and father were standing in the
office, talking. His mother started to cry and his father embraced
her. Connor slipped silently off the sofa and made his way to the
weapons cabinet. An assortment of sharp wooden stakes lay on the
bottom shelf. Connor chose the sharpest looking one. The lighter
wood of the point gleamed in the shadows of the room.
"Angel, I'm sorry...I shouldn't..." Cordelia sobbed in Angel's arms.
She held on to him, her arms wrapped around his shoulders, and finally
cried for the baby that she had lost too. She pushed herself away,
wiping at her eyes and putting the desk between them. "I'm being
selfish. You were Connor's father."
"You were his mother." Angel finally voiced the title that everyone
had silently given her. He looked up at Cordelia to gage her reaction
and was surprised by the horror on her face. "Cordelia." Angel
stepped toward her.
"No!" Cordelia yelled. She jumped across the desk, scattering the
papers over the floor. With a strength she didn't know she possessed,
Cordelia shoved Angel out of the way and caught the boy in her arms.
They fell to the floor, Cordelia twisting so that she landed on the
bottom.
"Momma! Momma, no," the boy cried. He buried his head in the crook
of her neck. "No, Momma, Daddy's supposed to die. He's a bad man.
He's evil, Momma. You shouldn't protect him. Holtz said...he said..."
At the mention of Holtz's name, Angel stiffened. He watched Cordelia
lift the boys head from her neck. "Connor?" Her voice was weak and
Angel shuddered as a thin trail of blood traced a line from the corner
of her mouth down her cheek. She was hurt.
And the sobbing boy in her arms was their son. Angel gently lifted
Connor off of Cordelia. The polished end of a stake was all that was
visible. The stake had been driven deep into her chest right between
her breasts. Angel fell to his knees beside her. There was nothing he
could do. "Cordelia." He caressed her hair and cradled her in his
arms. She moaned in pain, but kept her beautiful eyes focused on him.
"Cordelia, I love you. I should have said it before, but...I love
you. You're so strong and loving and...I don't know if I can do this.
Please, Cordy, don't leave me."
Cordelia felt the wetness of Angel's tears as he buried his head in
her neck much as his son had done. She could hear Connor crying
beside them. "I...love you...and Connor." Cordelia reached out and
lay her hand on Connor's head. He crawled back to his place on her
chest. It didn't matter, the pain was fading. "Look after your...son,
Angel."
Her smile was like the sun, it burned through him and lit up his
world. Angel raised his head in time to see it once more before her
eyes darkened and she went still, her heart giving out in a fluttery
thump. He hugged her and Connor tightly.
The End