Say Huh? Karaoke
THE WHEEL OF ALMOST-DEATH
Disclaimer: See chapter one
~~~
-The screen starts with a close-up of wheel with multi-colored spaces-
JADYN: Time for the WHEEL OF ALMOST-DEATH! Steve, William, you're each going to spin this wheel and you have to sing one verse and the chorus of whatever song comes up.
-STEVE and WILLIAM grimace-
JADYN: Then, the judges score you. Let's go!
-WILLIAM approaches the wheel. He spins it and it lands on "Whenever, Wherever" by Shakira-
JADYN: Ready?
-WILLIAM nods-
WILLIAM:* Lucky that my lips not only mumble,
They spill kisses like a fountain.
Lucky that my breasts are small and humble,
So you don't confuse them with mountains.
Lucky I have strong legs like my mother,
To run for cover when I need it.
And these two eyes that for no other
The day you leave will cry a river.*
*Le lo lo le lo le
Le lo lo le lo le
At your feet,
I'm at your feet*
*Whenever, wherever
We're meant to be together.
I'll be there and you'll be near
And that's the deal my dear.
Hereover, thereunder
You'll never have to wonder
We can always play by ear
But that's the deal my dear.*
-WILLIAM finishes, blushing. JADYN walks over to him-
JADYN: Okay judges, what do you think?
REMY: Remy t'inks dat a man performin' dat song is pretty scary. You get an eight.
SPIKE: Man, bloke, you're brave. Seven.
SHELLY: Don't ever belly-dance in front of me again, Regal. Seven.
JADYN: Alright William, that's a twenty-two. Steve, your turn.
-STEVE spins the wheel. It lands on "Rest In Peace" by Spike-
SPIKE: He doesn't have to sing. He gets a ten from me.
JADYN: Shut up! Let's go Steve!
-STEVE takes a deep breath and starts-
STEVE: *I died so many years ago,
But you can make me feel like it isn't so.
And why you've come to be with me,
I think I finally know.
Mmm.
You're scared, ashamed of what you feel
And you can't tell the ones you love,
You know they couldn't deal.
Whisper in a dead man's ear,
That doesn't make it real.*
*That's great.
But I don't wanna play.
'Cause being with you touches me
More than I can say.
But since I'm only dead to you,
I'm saying stay away…
And let me rest*
*Let me rest in peace
Let me get some sleep
Let me take my love and bury it
In a hole six-foot deep.
I can lay my body down
But I can't find my sweet release
Let me rest in peace!*
-STEVE gives the thumbs-up to SPIKE-
JADYN: Okay, scores?
REMY: Nine, cher.
SPIKE: Ten, luv.
SHELLY: Nine. Gotta love the dimples!
JADYN: Which gives Steve a score of twenty-eight, making him the winner!
STEVE: What do I win? Huh?
JADYN: A cherry popsicle. Join us next time on 'Say Huh? Karaoke'! Bye!
-As we leave, STEVE is screaming in outrage. JADYN and REMY are snogging in his chair. SPIKE is having a conversation with SHELLY and KANE, who is bound and gagged on the floor. And in the corner of your eye, you can see the AUDIENCE sneaking out the back door as JADYN'S men dance on-stage. Thank God it's over… or is it?-
(Just joking, it is…)
A/N: The lyrics of "Wherever, Whenever" belong to Shakira. The lyrics of "Rest in Peace" belong to Joss Whedon. Don't sue me!
THE WHEEL OF ALMOST-DEATH
Disclaimer: See chapter one
~~~
-The screen starts with a close-up of wheel with multi-colored spaces-
JADYN: Time for the WHEEL OF ALMOST-DEATH! Steve, William, you're each going to spin this wheel and you have to sing one verse and the chorus of whatever song comes up.
-STEVE and WILLIAM grimace-
JADYN: Then, the judges score you. Let's go!
-WILLIAM approaches the wheel. He spins it and it lands on "Whenever, Wherever" by Shakira-
JADYN: Ready?
-WILLIAM nods-
WILLIAM:* Lucky that my lips not only mumble,
They spill kisses like a fountain.
Lucky that my breasts are small and humble,
So you don't confuse them with mountains.
Lucky I have strong legs like my mother,
To run for cover when I need it.
And these two eyes that for no other
The day you leave will cry a river.*
*Le lo lo le lo le
Le lo lo le lo le
At your feet,
I'm at your feet*
*Whenever, wherever
We're meant to be together.
I'll be there and you'll be near
And that's the deal my dear.
Hereover, thereunder
You'll never have to wonder
We can always play by ear
But that's the deal my dear.*
-WILLIAM finishes, blushing. JADYN walks over to him-
JADYN: Okay judges, what do you think?
REMY: Remy t'inks dat a man performin' dat song is pretty scary. You get an eight.
SPIKE: Man, bloke, you're brave. Seven.
SHELLY: Don't ever belly-dance in front of me again, Regal. Seven.
JADYN: Alright William, that's a twenty-two. Steve, your turn.
-STEVE spins the wheel. It lands on "Rest In Peace" by Spike-
SPIKE: He doesn't have to sing. He gets a ten from me.
JADYN: Shut up! Let's go Steve!
-STEVE takes a deep breath and starts-
STEVE: *I died so many years ago,
But you can make me feel like it isn't so.
And why you've come to be with me,
I think I finally know.
Mmm.
You're scared, ashamed of what you feel
And you can't tell the ones you love,
You know they couldn't deal.
Whisper in a dead man's ear,
That doesn't make it real.*
*That's great.
But I don't wanna play.
'Cause being with you touches me
More than I can say.
But since I'm only dead to you,
I'm saying stay away…
And let me rest*
*Let me rest in peace
Let me get some sleep
Let me take my love and bury it
In a hole six-foot deep.
I can lay my body down
But I can't find my sweet release
Let me rest in peace!*
-STEVE gives the thumbs-up to SPIKE-
JADYN: Okay, scores?
REMY: Nine, cher.
SPIKE: Ten, luv.
SHELLY: Nine. Gotta love the dimples!
JADYN: Which gives Steve a score of twenty-eight, making him the winner!
STEVE: What do I win? Huh?
JADYN: A cherry popsicle. Join us next time on 'Say Huh? Karaoke'! Bye!
-As we leave, STEVE is screaming in outrage. JADYN and REMY are snogging in his chair. SPIKE is having a conversation with SHELLY and KANE, who is bound and gagged on the floor. And in the corner of your eye, you can see the AUDIENCE sneaking out the back door as JADYN'S men dance on-stage. Thank God it's over… or is it?-
(Just joking, it is…)
A/N: The lyrics of "Wherever, Whenever" belong to Shakira. The lyrics of "Rest in Peace" belong to Joss Whedon. Don't sue me!