The door creaked slightly as Phoebe pushed it open. All around her, the manor was dark, the lights extinguished in the small hours of the morning. She let the stained glass door shut behind her as she began to creep up the stairs. Something, however, drew her attention away from the bed that was calling her name just a few steps away. She turned back around and hesitated before flicking on the lights in the living room. They illuminated the area, spraying the furniture with a dusting of pale yellow beams. Phoebe shielded her eyes for a moment as they adjusted to the brightness, then lowered her hand to glance about the empty room.
It was as it had always been, the couch and table in the center on a fake Persian rug, the seldom-used fireplace and mantle littered with trinkets vacations and antique shops. The usual pieces of furniture were all in place and were all in tact, despite many of them having had had run-ins with random demons and sisterly rivalry. They were all restored to their former majesty, free from the cracks and dents that had once scarred their figures.
As she looked around one last time before she left for bed, Phoebe paused as she noticed the picture in the oaken frame on the end table. She approached it slowly and lifted it with tender care as she recognized the faces, which she traced with her index finger.
She and her sisters stood in a row, Piper, then Paige, and finally herself. It had been the first and only picture the new family had taken together, right after Paige had moved into the manor a month earlier. Leo had taken the photograph with one of those disposable cameras, while Cole had watched from behind him. No one had expected the snapshot to come out as nicely as it had, defining each of the women's features with intricate detail. All three of the girls were filthy, tired, and cranky after a long day of hauling luggage and furniture through the house, but somehow they found a second to see the good side of their labor, and smiled widely for the camera.
Phoebe sighed and let the three happy sisters in the picture become a blur. Instead, she focused on her own reflection in the glass, watching herself as if for the first time. She saw the deep circles under her eyes and the faded river of mascara that had embedded itself on her cheek. She tried to wipe it away, rubbing furiously at her skin until it was red in the glass. She heaved and gave up, but refused to glance away from her reflection in the picture. Looking into her own eyes, she saw something buried deep within her that she couldn't quite put her finger on. It wasn't the child growing inside her, or the feeling of guilt that she had every time she looked in the mirror. No, it was something more, and it irritated her to no end that she had no idea what was going on inside her own head. She stared deeper, only to be rewarded with a headache. She relaxed her eyes again and wheezed lightly.
There was a flash. Not a flash of light, but more a flash of darkness. The lamps in the room flickered for a second, blinking in and out of order as Phoebe saw an image appear next to hers in the glass. Cole smiled at her and winked, his translucent face shining with pride as he faded again. His lips moved without a sound, trying to say something that Phoebe couldn't make out.
"What are you saying?!" she hissed to the picture. "Oh God, just tell me what you're saying!"
The window behind her burst open and she snapped her head up. A strong gust of wind made the pane slam against the wall, the glass cracking as the wind blew in a handful of dry leaves. She looked back at the picture, but Cole's face in the glass was gone. The wind continued to howl both outside and in as Phoebe felt another flood of tears overwhelm her.
"Cole…" she whispered, dropping the frame to the floor. "Please don't leave me…" She fell onto the couch, curling into a tight ball as she closed her eyes to sleep…
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The world around her spun too quickly for Phoebe to make out what she was seeing. It almost looked like the manor, but there was no furniture around. As the spinning slowed, the room around her became clear, and she recognized the foyer of the manor. She was standing in the open doorway, watching as Cole descended the stairs slowly.
"Hey baby," he said. "I've missed you."
Phoebe stuttered from her position, her knuckles turning white as she gripped the doorframe. "Bu…But you… you're d-de…?"
"Dead? Yeah, I know." Cole finally managed to make it down the stairs to her, pulling her gently inside the manor. The cold wind from the street that had been whipping at her back ceased as he shut the door and enveloped her in a warm embrace. "I never meant for this to happen, Phoebe. You know that, right?"
She was trembling in his arms, but managed her quiet reply. "Of course I know."
He nodded and kissed her head. "Then you also know that there's nothing you can do for me. It's over, baby. I've got to move on…and so do you. And I can't do that unless I know that you'll be okay."
Phoebe shook her head vigorously and clenched her fists in his shirt collar. "No, I won't. I can't. Please, it's too soon to let you go. I've only just gotten you back."
Cole lifted her chin with his hand so he could look in to her eyes. "You won't be able to take care of our baby of you don't… Once I had died, the higher powers gave me an option: I could see your future if you did let me go, or the future if you didn't. I wanted to see if you didn't, and I can tell you, it wasn't pretty. You lost the baby after about a month, since you never ate or slept. You were really depressed, moping around the manor and being a general nuisance. Saving innocents didn't matter to you anymore. You even pushed your sisters away. Don't end up like that, Phoebe. I don't want to spend eternity knowing that I ruined your life."
Phoebe's lower lip quivered in his palm as the tears welled up in her eyes again. "You were the only reason that my life wasn't in shambles, Cole. You made me a whole person."
"But then I ripped your heart out," he countered. "On numerous occasions, if I remember correctly. You should hate me."
"How could I hate you for being yourself, or for something that you had no control over? It was beyond our command."
Cole shrugged. "I never got a chance to make things right between us, after me powers were stripped and the proposal… I just thought that you might resent me for leaving you to bear the burden alone."
"A child is hardly a burden, Cole. It's a blessing. Albeit a blessing that requires a lot of work, but a blessing nonetheless. And just the fact that the baby is yours makes it all worth it." Phoebe sighed and wrapped her arms around him. "I don't want to let you go."
Cole exhaled sharply, squeezing her around the waist with loving tenderness. "You're going to have to. Piper's coming…" he trailed off as Phoebe heard a faint voice floating somewhere above her.
"Phoebe…"
"Oh God, not now," Phoebe looked back to Cole, who was no longer in her arms, but seemingly gliding up the stairs. "Cole, wait!"
He turned to he and smiled, his bright blue eyes shining. "I love you, Phoebe, but do me one last favor: let me go. For yourself, and for our baby…"
"Phoebe…"
Phoebe dashed to the stairs, stumbling as the floor opened beneath her feet.
"You can't follow me, Phoebe. Please, go home. Your sisters need you…"
She felt herself falling through the crack, screaming Cole's name as she heard the last thing he said.
"Just move on…"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Cole! Cole, wait!"
Phoebe sat upright on the couch, her already filthy shirt soaked with sweat. Piper was at her side, a glass of water and what looked like Advil in her hand.
"Shhhh… it's alright, honey. It's okay, it was just a dream." She eased Phoebe into a sitting position, then sat down next her. Piper wrapped a comforting arm around Phoebe's shoulders. Phoebe leaned against her and wept, shaking violently in her sister's arms as she let go of all her resignations.
"God, how can I live without him, Piper? I loved him so much…" Phoebe whispered, fearing that anything louder might deafen the silences. "And now, with the-" She stopped, suddenly realizing that Piper didn't know about the baby yet. She gulped and tried to forget that she was about to say it out loud. Piper had been wanting a baby for so long, and it seemed only right that she should have one first, but now…
"With the what?" Piper asked gently, her eyes soft with understanding. "With the…the baby?"
Phoebe let her jaw drop slightly, before shaking her head in disbelief. "How did you…?"
"You were talking in your sleep. I heard you come in earlier, but figured that you wanted to be alone. When I heard you talking to someone, I came down to investigate, but you were out cold on the couch. I didn't want to wake you so I just sat and listened. You were dreaming about Cole." Piper stroked her little sister's hair as though she were a child in her arms, crying over a scraped knee.
Phoebe snuggled into the maternal gesture with ease and remained curled up there while she thought about the dream again. "I was in the manor, with Cole, and he told me I had to move on… if not for myself or the baby, then for you."
"I heard," Piper replied. "All I heard was your half of the conversation, but it was enough to give me an idea… Phoebe, I'm sorry about Cole. I just wish that there was some way to reverse time, to take it all back."
The younger sister nodded and closed her eyes. "There's nothing to take back, Piper. He's gone. I'll see him again someday, just maybe not as soon as I'd like to hope. Until then, I have my baby to think of. My son…" The pieces nearly fit themselves together as Phoebe realized that her premonition and Hattie's dream had been one in the same. The little boy in her premonition had been the son she carried inside of her, and the lonely woman had been Phoebe, alive and well without Cole. She had made it after all. She had survived the loss, grown through it, and had given birth to a beautiful baby boy... or so she thought. What did the future hold for her, other than the perfect child that had shown himself to her? With her eyes still closed, Phoebe squeezed Piper's waist and thought deeply, trying to bring back the premonition that had struck her so profoundly the night before. The image of the field flooded her vision, the small blond boy toddling ahead of her. She finally saw her own face, followed by that of a handsome young man, who came up from behind and swept her off the ground and whisked her through the tall grass. She heard shouts from behind and the man turned for both of them.
"Mom!"
A girl, who looked older than the boy, called out to her, and she jumped from the man's arms. She ran to her and hugged her tightly, whispering something into her ear just as Phoebe saw her Piper run past them all to swing the little boy into her arms. The vision faded, and Phoebe was once again in the quiet living room of the manor. She opened her eyes and smiled, remembering the girl's bright blue eyes and thick chestnut hair, and the small blond boy running through the fields.
"Piper?"
The oldest sister yawned and glanced downward. "Hm?"
"Congratulations."
"For what, Phoebes?"
Phoebe grinned, and settled back into the couch to sleep. Piper did the same as Phoebe replied, "You'll just have to wait and see…"
Fin
A/N: I finally finished it! (yes, that was the end) Just as I find out I'm nominated for best unfinished fic at the Halliwell Haven Awards for this piece, I finish it. Oh well. I needed to write something. Don't worry, VoD and Torn are next on my To-Do list. After that, I have a novel to finish, so you might not see me for a while. Anyway, hope you enjoyed 'Tis A Shame!
*Dimples*