AN: Be prepared for ridiculous strange stuff… although if you're reading
this you'd know that already. Damn it, why do I have to be so weird!?
**CLAIMER/DISCLAIMER** Here's one for you, Aurora!! :P If you see any people here you don't recognise, they're probably mine, ok?
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*Comic Interlude Part 2/Chapter 7* James! Is that you in Remus' belly?!
Lily shrieked. Facing her, perched on James' motionless body, was a fully grown werewolf. Its eyes were glittering like red sapphires, glaring angrily at her. Sirius and Peter whipped out their wands.
'HOY!' they screamed together, and Lily flew sideways into a ditch. The werewolf stood staring, confused. It didn't know whether to go after Lily or defend its prey.
'Remus,' said Sirius, his voice trembling. 'That's you, isn't it?' But the creature only snarled. Very obviously poor Remus had no control over his wolfish mind and would eat his friends as readily as he would understand them.
The werewolf lunged at Peter, and Lily screamed. Peter ducked and scurried to the ditch where she was hidden. Remus turned his fury-lit eyes towards Sirius and growled. Lily drew out her wand with shaking hands, the way she'd done at the lake with Malfoy and Snape, and aimed at the werewolf.
'NO LILY! DON'T…!'
'Exp-exp-expelliarmus!' Lily squeaked. For a moment it looked like nothing happened, but then several tufts of fur flew out of Remus' coat and smothered her face. The werewolf recoiled in pain and humiliation, then turned towards her.
'Run, Lily!' She didn't need warning twice. But as she hurled herself back into the ditch, the werewolf pounced and knocked her to the ground.
Lily's heart was pounding in her chest. Common sense warned her that the werewolf would not like it if she screamed. Sirius and Peter held their breaths for a long, long moment that seemed to stretch across an eternity. The werewolf's paws pressed into Lily's chest. She found her breaths growing louder and louder. And then…
'Hold up, bro!'
Three shadowed figures emerged from behind a cluster of trees, pointing wands at the werewolf. Lily squinted and she could see that their robes glowed green in the moonlight. One of them looked familiar.
'…Rhonda?'
Rhonda looked down at Lily. 'Think I'd abandon you in your time of need? No chance, buddy. We're here to put a stop to this silliness.'
Sirius drew back, staring. 'Erm…'
'Ah yes!' cried one of the others, a shorter girl with brown hair. 'How rude of us. Introductions first, of course, of course. I'm Krystal.'
'I'm Rhonda.'
'And I'm Chelsea,' said a third, blond girl. 'And we're… Super Fine No Grime Saving Time Werewolf Busters!' They pulled off a few backflips and star-jumps, landing in a striking pose. All this time they kept their wands pointed at the werewolf who still had Lily pinned to the ground, but was now looking at them curiously.
'Well, how do you like it?' said Krystal to Lily. 'We spent, like, *hours* working on that routine.'
Sirius looked at them like he was about to wet his pants. 'Oh come on, please! This is too ridiculous! This would never happen, not even in an imagination fantasy book!' [AN: Many thanks to my… flaming friend, who said something like this]
'Nonsense!' said Chelsea. She stared down the werewolf. It slowly got off Lily's chest and slinked away into the trees, though looking back at the three girls in a way that said something other than that it wanted to eat them.
'See?' Rhonda gloated. 'We do it, every time! Well, gotta go, I—' She stopped abruptly as she saw what Remus was doing. 'No! Bad boy!'
Sirius rushed over and snarled at the werewolf, who had bits of James hanging out of his mouth.
'Bad, bad Remus! You don't eat your friends!' Krystal wagged a finger at the werewolf, who dropped James' toes and slithered away sadly.
'Uh, Kryssie?' Chelsea came up from behind. 'I think we're a little late.'
Lily threw back her head and began to howl much like Remus had done. For when they looked down at what remained of James there was only a pile of robes and the few toes that had fallen from Remus' mouth.
The next morning Lily's eyes were puffy and red from crying all night. She had hung James' robes in her dorm, along with a box that contained his toes. She went slowly down to the common room and into the Great Hall where she was met by Sirius, Peter, and Remus.
'Lily…'
'No, don't speak! I – the only voice I want to hear is… No, no, you're right.'
'Lily, I'm sorry.' Remus was distraught. 'I – I wasn't in my right mind! Please, I didn't mean to do it!'
'That's all right Remus,' Lily smiled though it obviously took a lot of effort. 'I understand. You were a … a werewolf and you had to eat. It's all right.'
'No, it isn't, I…ate my friend… your boyfriend… I…' He dropped his head, looking upset. Before anyone could stop him he took out his wand, held it against his head and cried "Avada Kedavra". There was a flash of green light and there was Remus, lying in a heap at Lily's feet.
A long moment of shock.
Rhonda came over and put her arms around Lily, who was sobbing hysterically.
'I… I… dead! He is… all my… waaaaah!'
'Hush! Quiet Lily, you'll be okay.'
In the background, Peter and Sirius shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot as bystanders flocked around them to see what had happened.
'Er, come on Lily,' said Peter gently 'Let's just… go get some breakfast, okay?'
Sitting at the Gryffindor table, Lily felt sick staring at her bacon and eggs. Sirius, on the other hand, was stuffing his face.
'Come on, honey! Please, lighten up…' She glared at him and he stopped. 'Jeez, jeez, okay! It's just… what can we do about it Lily? They're dead, they're gone.' She didn't answer.
'Well, I guess that's the end of the story then, isn't it?' mumbled Peter. 'What with him being one of the main characters and all.'
'Yes, I suppose.' replied Sirius. 'But it doesn't feel right. I mean, poor Lily, and poor James, and poor Remus…'
Over at the Slytherin table, Snape was looking apprehensively at the sobbing girl. He nudged Crabbe: once, twice, three times.
'What? What is it? You made me spill orange juice on my bacon!'
'Shut up you loser! Listen, do you think I should go talk to Lily? Is now a good chance?'
'Now? Now?! Look at her, Severus. For goodness' sake! She's distraught!'
'I…' Snape faltered. His eyes hurt. 'I… just can't stand seeing her so miserable! Oh, this is all my fault!'
Then he dropped his head on the table and wailed.
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AN: Weird, VERY weird I know. Flame if you want, I don't really care. Cyaz l8r! :P
**CLAIMER/DISCLAIMER** Here's one for you, Aurora!! :P If you see any people here you don't recognise, they're probably mine, ok?
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
*Comic Interlude Part 2/Chapter 7* James! Is that you in Remus' belly?!
Lily shrieked. Facing her, perched on James' motionless body, was a fully grown werewolf. Its eyes were glittering like red sapphires, glaring angrily at her. Sirius and Peter whipped out their wands.
'HOY!' they screamed together, and Lily flew sideways into a ditch. The werewolf stood staring, confused. It didn't know whether to go after Lily or defend its prey.
'Remus,' said Sirius, his voice trembling. 'That's you, isn't it?' But the creature only snarled. Very obviously poor Remus had no control over his wolfish mind and would eat his friends as readily as he would understand them.
The werewolf lunged at Peter, and Lily screamed. Peter ducked and scurried to the ditch where she was hidden. Remus turned his fury-lit eyes towards Sirius and growled. Lily drew out her wand with shaking hands, the way she'd done at the lake with Malfoy and Snape, and aimed at the werewolf.
'NO LILY! DON'T…!'
'Exp-exp-expelliarmus!' Lily squeaked. For a moment it looked like nothing happened, but then several tufts of fur flew out of Remus' coat and smothered her face. The werewolf recoiled in pain and humiliation, then turned towards her.
'Run, Lily!' She didn't need warning twice. But as she hurled herself back into the ditch, the werewolf pounced and knocked her to the ground.
Lily's heart was pounding in her chest. Common sense warned her that the werewolf would not like it if she screamed. Sirius and Peter held their breaths for a long, long moment that seemed to stretch across an eternity. The werewolf's paws pressed into Lily's chest. She found her breaths growing louder and louder. And then…
'Hold up, bro!'
Three shadowed figures emerged from behind a cluster of trees, pointing wands at the werewolf. Lily squinted and she could see that their robes glowed green in the moonlight. One of them looked familiar.
'…Rhonda?'
Rhonda looked down at Lily. 'Think I'd abandon you in your time of need? No chance, buddy. We're here to put a stop to this silliness.'
Sirius drew back, staring. 'Erm…'
'Ah yes!' cried one of the others, a shorter girl with brown hair. 'How rude of us. Introductions first, of course, of course. I'm Krystal.'
'I'm Rhonda.'
'And I'm Chelsea,' said a third, blond girl. 'And we're… Super Fine No Grime Saving Time Werewolf Busters!' They pulled off a few backflips and star-jumps, landing in a striking pose. All this time they kept their wands pointed at the werewolf who still had Lily pinned to the ground, but was now looking at them curiously.
'Well, how do you like it?' said Krystal to Lily. 'We spent, like, *hours* working on that routine.'
Sirius looked at them like he was about to wet his pants. 'Oh come on, please! This is too ridiculous! This would never happen, not even in an imagination fantasy book!' [AN: Many thanks to my… flaming friend, who said something like this]
'Nonsense!' said Chelsea. She stared down the werewolf. It slowly got off Lily's chest and slinked away into the trees, though looking back at the three girls in a way that said something other than that it wanted to eat them.
'See?' Rhonda gloated. 'We do it, every time! Well, gotta go, I—' She stopped abruptly as she saw what Remus was doing. 'No! Bad boy!'
Sirius rushed over and snarled at the werewolf, who had bits of James hanging out of his mouth.
'Bad, bad Remus! You don't eat your friends!' Krystal wagged a finger at the werewolf, who dropped James' toes and slithered away sadly.
'Uh, Kryssie?' Chelsea came up from behind. 'I think we're a little late.'
Lily threw back her head and began to howl much like Remus had done. For when they looked down at what remained of James there was only a pile of robes and the few toes that had fallen from Remus' mouth.
The next morning Lily's eyes were puffy and red from crying all night. She had hung James' robes in her dorm, along with a box that contained his toes. She went slowly down to the common room and into the Great Hall where she was met by Sirius, Peter, and Remus.
'Lily…'
'No, don't speak! I – the only voice I want to hear is… No, no, you're right.'
'Lily, I'm sorry.' Remus was distraught. 'I – I wasn't in my right mind! Please, I didn't mean to do it!'
'That's all right Remus,' Lily smiled though it obviously took a lot of effort. 'I understand. You were a … a werewolf and you had to eat. It's all right.'
'No, it isn't, I…ate my friend… your boyfriend… I…' He dropped his head, looking upset. Before anyone could stop him he took out his wand, held it against his head and cried "Avada Kedavra". There was a flash of green light and there was Remus, lying in a heap at Lily's feet.
A long moment of shock.
Rhonda came over and put her arms around Lily, who was sobbing hysterically.
'I… I… dead! He is… all my… waaaaah!'
'Hush! Quiet Lily, you'll be okay.'
In the background, Peter and Sirius shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot as bystanders flocked around them to see what had happened.
'Er, come on Lily,' said Peter gently 'Let's just… go get some breakfast, okay?'
Sitting at the Gryffindor table, Lily felt sick staring at her bacon and eggs. Sirius, on the other hand, was stuffing his face.
'Come on, honey! Please, lighten up…' She glared at him and he stopped. 'Jeez, jeez, okay! It's just… what can we do about it Lily? They're dead, they're gone.' She didn't answer.
'Well, I guess that's the end of the story then, isn't it?' mumbled Peter. 'What with him being one of the main characters and all.'
'Yes, I suppose.' replied Sirius. 'But it doesn't feel right. I mean, poor Lily, and poor James, and poor Remus…'
Over at the Slytherin table, Snape was looking apprehensively at the sobbing girl. He nudged Crabbe: once, twice, three times.
'What? What is it? You made me spill orange juice on my bacon!'
'Shut up you loser! Listen, do you think I should go talk to Lily? Is now a good chance?'
'Now? Now?! Look at her, Severus. For goodness' sake! She's distraught!'
'I…' Snape faltered. His eyes hurt. 'I… just can't stand seeing her so miserable! Oh, this is all my fault!'
Then he dropped his head on the table and wailed.
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AN: Weird, VERY weird I know. Flame if you want, I don't really care. Cyaz l8r! :P