Title: Choices
Author: Joy
Email: SleepingBeauty2@ziplip.com
"What are you saying?" Buffy pushed out. Spike couldn't actually be thinking of leaving.
"I'm saying I'll go with LilBit to LA if need be…" Spike ground out with pain. Dawn started to climb down the latter in the Magic Box to hear better the conversation at least on Spike's end. Buffy cried on the other end of the phone. "I love you, Buffy…but that doesn't matter now does it? You'll never see that as real…and Dawn really needs something stable… Maybe it would be best if she lived with your dad. I could bring her home on weekends…"
"I can't believe I'm having this conversation with you…" Buffy whimpered.
"Buffy, don't cry. If there's a way to keep her here we'll find it…but she's just a kid."
Buffy's anger welled inside her, "I was just a kid at her age when I got this gig."
Spike snarled, "You also had a mum and dad in the same town, people who could keep a roof over your head and a bloody watcher to catch you in the vamp realm. What has Dawn got? A mum that died six months after she became a human, a dad that is MIA, a sister just back from the dead trying to keep her head above water between slaying and working, not to mention the ram shackle team of baby-faced twenties that can barely feed themselves let alone help a teenager. You want to pissed at the raw deal you got go a head but when you needed to feel safe and cared for as a teen you had it, even if you didn't appreciate it."
Dawn stood and stared at the back of Spike's head during his railing on Buffy. He got it…someone actually got it.
"Look pet… Tara has been mum to her siblings. That's the only reason social services didn't take Dawn while you were dead, but Tara's not Dawn's family," Spike said more calmly.
"What about you Spike?" Buffy said meekly.
"What about me pet?" he groaned having not a clue where this was going.
"From what I understand you were Dawn's dad this summer…nighttime parent while Tara was her daytime parent," Buffy said quietly.
"What does that have to do with anything?"
"You said we'd find a way to keep her… You could be that way," Buffy whispered.
"I'm sorry luv…I can't hear that from you. It's not fair. Dawn will stay with me tonight. You talk things over with Tara and I will talk to you later… I may not call you on your manipulation of my love often, but I won't have you twisting it when it comes to Dawn," Spike growled.
"That's not…" was all Buffy got out as the phone clicked off.
Dawn stood at the base of the latter when Spike turned around. She looked at him sternly, "Something has been going on with Buffy and you for a couple months now… Maybe I should be mad at you too for keeping her from being home for me?"
Spike closed his eyes, "Maybe you should. Maybe I'm the thing in this scenario that needs to change or leave…" He sighed and sat on an available chair. "I'm sorry…"
"You were my closest friend then you dropped me when Buffy woke up," Dawn said with brimming anger.
"That's only partly true," Spike stated quickly.
Dawn swallowed a few times before speaking again. "You would go with me to LA if I left?"
"I promised, didn't I?" he said through gritted teeth. "It's not like there's anything for me here but you."
"That's not true…There's Buffy and the Scoobies," she said in her very teenage way.
"Pet, I will never have Buffy and the second I'm out of her good graces I'm out of theirs."
Dawn rocked back on her heals, "What was it that Buffy said that you said she was twisting your love over?"
Spike wracked his fingers through his hair a few times and then ran his hands over his face. "Ya know you Summers women are great at tying me in knots?"
"You didn't answer the question."
He sighed, "She said I might be the answer to keeping you here. I don't know what that means but the way she said it…"
"What?" Dawn asked curiously.
"I can't Dawn," he shook his head.
"You can't be the thing that keeps me here?" she asked.
"No…" Spike groaned. "I can't tell you what I thought… I can't put a thought like that about your sister in your head."
"You mean the thought that she would seduce you or beat you or torture you by both physical and sexual ways to get what she wants," Dawn said completely dead pan. "I know my sister better then you think I do."
Spike just stared at her in silence.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The short knock on the front door brought Buffy out of her reverie. She had just been staring at the wall until Tara arrived. Buffy stood and looked into her blond friend's face. She opened the door, received a short hug and then went back over to the couch.
"They're both leaving," Buffy muttered.
Tara didn't pretend she didn't understand. "That hasn't been decided."
"Am I being selfish by keeping her here?" Buffy looked at Tara with puffy eyes. "Is it wrong for me to want to protect her?"
Tara stroked her hair, "No Buffy… but you need help, and more help then is at your disposal right now." Buffy just stared at the wall. "Dawn could have hurt herself again or stolen something else…at least now you know. Finding my little brother on the bathroom floor O.D.ed on meds was not the way I wanted to find out I wasn't cutting it."
Buffy's eyes flew to Tara's face, "What?"
"Oh he survived and things had to change at home… I would have rather things not gotten that far. I guess you can be thankful that for a few minutes tonight she became an adult enough to ask for help rather then doing something that could have permanently injured her."
Buffy began to cry again, "Be thankful I didn't drive my sister to kill herself? Great."
"That's not what I said…" Tara said sternly to get Buffy focused back on the problem at hand. "What do you want to do? We can call social services and see about getting you guys on welfare."
Buffy blanched, "That would mean people snooping around and maybe taking Dawn away."
"Buffy… She hates your dad and is thinking of going there. Things aren't good," Tara stated clearly. The slayer swallowed. "What do you see as the biggest needs you have in caring for Dawn?"
"Not spending the night with Spike…" she groaned. Tara rolled her eyes. "I need money to keep the house going, Willow to pay rent and help with bills, and my dad to send us more money each month to keep us afloat. Maybe if I didn't have to work I could be home more."
"The home more is going to be a big part of helping Dawn," Tara interjected. "The money stuff is important, but actually being here for Dawn will be the part that makes her feel safe and loved."
"I have to patrol," Buffy groaned.
"Spike and you can trade off nights to patrol and stay home with Dawn," the witch challenged. "But that would mean you would have to treat him like a person and he would have a say in how Dawn was raised."
Buffy sighed and flopped back on the couch. "I think I already blew that option out of the water about a million times now."
"Then maybe its time to put the Spike addiction on the table and allowed Spike to be a person instead of a thing you use," Tara said firmly.
"Do I have to?" Buffy moaned pathetically not ready to face facts.
"Do you want to keep your sister?" was the answer she got.