Title: Doctor

Name: Joy       

Email: SleepingBeauty2@ziplip.com

            Dawn sat anxiously waiting for Gunn to leave Spike's side. Buffy did her best to sooth the teen's fears but knew in no uncertain terms Spike was going to make this easy on Gunn. "He wouldn't eat him, would he?" Dawn asked nervous suddenly.

            Buffy gave her a stern look. "Don't second guess him?" Both sisters sat silently. "Did he… Has he…" Buffy questioned.

            Dawn looked at her sister's shamed face and said, "I think I've convinced him we should leave and go home…but right now you have to let me and Tara take care of him. He's gonna spontaneously combust if he shares any more intimacies with you before he's ready."

            "I don't get…"

            "He says he needs to know where you end and he begins," Dawn said looking at Buffy. "The blood complicated that. He always said he was drowning in you. That you coursed through his veins. Now you actually do and… When it comes down to it let him be the Victorian man underneath all that leather. He wants to court you… He wants to give you back some of those teenage experiences you lost because you were the slayer," Dawn said confidently.

            "He said that to you?" Buffy asked.

            "Yeah… That was why I had trouble getting his attention earlier tonight when I called to tell you we were underway. He was thinking about the future…you and him. He didn't give me specifics other then trying to make up for part of what you lost… When I suggested one of those rights of passage be having sex in his car, he hit the roof…not literally but you get the picture. He wants…he wants to date you…be the boyfriend. I think that's all he really wanted to begin with." Dawn slightly snorted, "Not that I don't think he was absolutely ecstatic he was sleeping with you…but I honestly believe more then anything he wanted to give you normal… or as much normal as possible in his world with some from ours like movies, dinner, and dates."

            Buffy ran both hands through her hair. "I suck!" she whispered fervently. "Angel tried to do that for me but he didn't know how. Plus he never wanted me to encounter his demon. Spike is comfortable with his, not at odds with it… Somehow I think Spike could pull off the boyfriend thing because he isn't conflicted about who he is… Until the Initiative got a hold of him… and me…"

            "Than back off for a while… Believe me, living with us will be enough of a reminder of what he can have. Just don't shove it down his throat," Dawn explained.

            Gunn exited the bedroom causing both Summers girls to stand. "Fred… I helped him get ready. Might be good if you looked at his legs. He seems pretty anxious to leave," Gunn commented slightly smirked at Buffy.

            She sighed in relief then moved with Fred and Dawn into the bedroom. "Hey now… Being checked by a doctor… No need for prying eyes," Spike said in an unreadable tone.

            "Sorry 'Big Bad' but I don't trust you to tell us everything the doc says so…we're staying," Dawn informed her father figure.

            "Alright…I'm not an actual MD so you'll have to bear with me… Out from under the covers," Fred said quickly grabbing the comforter.

            "Not in front of LilBit," he said sharply. "Don't need anyone thinking I'm… She shouldn't see me in my knickers!"

            "I'll turn around," Dawn said pulling her sister too.

            "What? I've seen him in his 'knickers' already today," Buffy complained turning around.

            "And less then that on occasion," the teen said.

            "Dawn!" Buffy and Spike both yelled.

            Fred rolled her eyes. "Lets have a look at your legs." Spike pulled back the covers and let Fred have a peak. She pulled off the splints and ran her hands over his legs. "Fascinating," she whispered. "I've seen Angel recover from flesh wounds but this…this is amazing."

            "I'm glad you like my legs doc," Spike joked.

            "No flirting with the doctor," Buffy announced.

Spike had to smile at the protectiveness she had for him. "'Kay luv."

"This time I'm going to put pressure where the breaks were," Fred informed him.  Spike hissed a bit on his left leg though his right leg didn't seem to bother him at all. "Thank the slayers for the fact you won't be in a wheelchair for a few months… I'll see if we have a pair of crutches you can use." Fred left the room leaving them in silence. She had no idea what caused the heavy atmosphere but it was there.

When he had covered his legs back up he whispered, "Thank you."

Dawn turned around and crawled up the bed to lie down beside him. "You're welcome," she said sweetly hugging his chest.

Spike's eyes met Buffy's for a long while. She desperately wanted to do what Dawn had done and just snuggle up to him. But if this was going to work…if they were going to work…she would have to wait until she was invited. So she stood apart from the scene just staring into Spike's eyes.

Finally he said, "Thank you," for an entirely different reason then his legs.

"You're welcome… I'll go help Fred."

Buffy fled the room fast. She honed in on where Tara was and sought solace in her friend. The blond witch just hugged the slayer as she cried and mewed. "It hurts… It hurts so much…to see him just beyond this invisible wall…to love him so much and know he loves me. To know it's there and we're not doing anything about it…it's killing me," Buffy blubbered.

"Now you know how Spike's felt for months. To have you come to him night after night and then deny there was anything there," Tara said leaning back to look her friend in the face. "At least he'll admit he loves you and he's not embarrassed by you. He's willing to say 'maybe'."

"I always said 'never'," the slayer whispered with tears rolling down her cheeks. She wiped her face with her palms and sniffled.

Dawn had left the bedroom in search of Spike's bag to see if there were any pants that he could wear over the splints. "What's wrong? Why didn't you go hug Spike?" Dawn asked innocently of her sister when she saw her crying.

Buffy put on her best face. "We hugged earlier."

"Why are you crying?"

Tara stroked Buffy's hair. "I hurts to love someone and have them be at arms length," the witch said softly.

Dawn's face-hardened toward them both then relaxed but then hardened again. "Yeah… Like Spike and I don't know anything about what that feels like." The teen walked away in a snit searching out Angel for help.

"She's going to be mad for a long time, won't she?" Buffy asked quietly.

"There will be good days and bad days. The bad days will be when she feels like you brought the pain on yourself or have been injured the way you injured her or Spike," Tara observed. "I'm going to go talk to Spike by myself, okay?" Buffy nodded.

Tara entered the room watching Spike lay back peacefully. "It helps to have your eyes open," she said. Spike's head wiped around to look at her. "That's better. I've seen near dead Spike enough for a long while."

"Tinkerbell," he smiled more then smirked.

"Thought I'd come in and get my own 'Spike' time," she said sitting on the bed. "How are you feeling? And I don't mean physically!"

He eyed her a minute and said, "Physically my leg throbs and I totally hate the idea of being on crutches but its better then being in a chair."

"Don't want to talk, eh? We have ways of making you talk," she said in a mock German accent.

"As a rule pet, never do an accent the person you are talking to speaks the language of."

"Alright then…I'll tickle you if you don't talk to me," Tara said and went for his ribs.

"Why are you so curious?" he demanded.

"Not curious…Concerned. I seem to be someone you can vent with so vent away… Don't need to have you popping off after we get home. Release stress now and later rather then have you explode," she observed.

Spike sighed deeply, "I don't like the way things are with Buffy… You know that… I've said it…so lets move on."

"I don't think so… Why don't you like the way things are with Buffy?" Spike sat stoically. "Okay I'll say statements you agree or disagree," Tara offered. "You don't like the distance between you."

"Partly."

"You don't like the pain she is in because of this."

"Yes."

"You don't like having to be strong…to keep the wall up between you."

"Huh?" Spike looked at her face.

"It takes a lot of energy to keep you two apart. You want her to respect your wishes and keep her distance but you don't trust her enough to actually keep her word… Therefore the energy sucking wall is constructed," Tara answered.

He looked at her, "I guess that's true."

She looked at him hard, "You want me to be the actual barrier between you so you can rest."
            Suddenly Spike recognized what she was saying. "Tara… I'm not trying to use you… I asked you to stay with us. I wasn't trying to hurt you in any way."

            "Spike… I'm going to help because you're my friend but you need to understand this will hurt me. Staying in the same house as Willow will hurt me, like staying in the same house with Buffy hurts you," she stated clearly.

            "I can't hurt you, pet," he said in almost no voice. "I'm sure Red will help with moving me around… I'll just face Buffy alone. I'm sorry I asked…I didn't think."

"It hurts…" she asked and stated.

            "Yeah…every bloody minute." He looked into her wide eyes, "I had some space, some boundaries between us when we started heading home. Now they're gone again… I can't know what any of you went through while I was under but waking up with Buffy touching me…me touching her…drinking from her… all the boundaries were gone again."

"Close your eyes for me," Tara said soothingly. Spike did as he was asked. "Don't think about the past pain. Think only about the experience itself… Did it feel right?"

            Spike squeezed his eyes shut tight and then released them as he gritted his teeth. "I can't think of it that way Tara."

            "Why not?"

            "Because then she's my mate!" he announced.

She gave him a sympathetic look. "She loves you and wants to be with you."

"Now… What happens in a few weeks when I give in and she's no longer interested? What happens when she does what she always does and decides I'm a monster…that without the chip she can't love me? What happens then?" Spike growled.

Tara tilted her head, "Then we kick her ass…" Spike laughed then smiled. "Look… I know what all the insecurities feel like. If for some reason Buffy did that to you, she would get such hell from everyone and she knows it… But honestly, it's not going to happen. I wish you could have seen the abject horror on her face at the thought you might be dead… She's not going anywhere. She has to earn back your trust not the other way around…"

Spike stared at her for a moment then nodded. "Thank you for coming with Buffy."

"Not a problem… When we get home you can thank Xander for the use of his car, phone, and the great looking room he set up," Tara said with a smirk.

"Great… I'm indebted to the Whelp."

"Could be worse?"

"How?"

Tara smirked, "Could be in debt to Gunn… Oh wait… you are already."

"Witch!" Spike laughed.

"What of it?!"

"Nothing luv… So what do you think of the boy?"

"You were here longer. You've been more exposed to him then any of us," she pointed out.

"Yeah, but you have that good 'aura reader' quality," Spike mentioned.

"So, you want me to cheat?"

"Yes," he said firmly.

She smirked, "Champion, loyal, loving, devoted, passionate, and intense."

"I don't know how I feel about the passionate part," Spike squirmed.

"Have you seen him in battle?" Tara asked.

"Yeah one night."

 "Does it describe him in a fight?"

Spike thought it over, "Good point… I liked him too. I just hate to admit it to myself… I thought that he was a guy I thought was worthy of my LilBit. I wanted her to date someone like him. I was just hoped it was someone younger and closer by."

"I think you should trust your gut and him," Tara offered.

"Right…" Spike sighed.

"Here we go," Dawn said as she burst into the room. She was holding up some black sweats and placing the crutches near the bed. "These should do."

"Dawn…Let me help him," Tara instructed, as it appeared that Dawn was ready to be the house nurse. She shrugged and left the room.

Somehow it was easier to accept help from Tara then anyone else. It suddenly dawned upon him. "Have I ever told you about my sister Elizabeth?" Spike said from nowhere.

She considered him a minute before saying, "No… Spike you haven't."

"Remind me to."

"Okay."

"I only bring it up because…well it just struck me that I am treating you very sisterly," Spike said stiltedly as they worked to get the sweats tied and fitted over the splints.

Tara smiled. "Be kind of cool…then I'd be Dawn's aunt." They laughed lightly before she said, "Time to face the rest of the crew. Ready William?"

"Why'd you call me that?"

"Isn't it a sister's prerogative to call their brother by his name or his nickname?"

"Alright Tinkerbell…have it your way."

TBC…